Try getting him to commit to little steps, like creating a loose routine. For example, try telling him that it is too lonely to sleep alone, and you'd really appreciate it if he'd come to bed before X time. Just make it a little step that he is comfortable with. Then when he has that down, you can work on more healthy habits. I personally really agree with LOLA926 in that you can talk to him and see if he will agree to having healthier/single serving snacks around. I know my mom had the same issue with my dad and it was mostly a convenience issue that led to his eating poorly. If that's the case, try making double of what you are having for dinner and give it to him when he comes home to hit the fridge, etc.
LOLA926 5/10/07 4:53 P
I had/have the same worries about my fiance. His family has many medical problems including heart problems and diabetes. I simply talked to him and told him that I want to be with him for the rest of our lives, and if he continues down the path he is on 'the rest of our lives' will not be a very long time. I also told him that I do not want to be a widow at 40 or 45 because he thinks he needs fast food. For you, maybe explain to him some of your concerns, without sounding like you are trying to get him to 'diet'. I refuse to purchase chips, ice cream etc, but if I do I get single servings items. We are all not perfect, and occasionally we both slip, but we are there to support each other, and I give him credit for keeping me on track a lot of the time.
If he is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with just talk to him and let him know you care and you are worried about him, and his health!
RYAN8669 5/10/07 12:28 P
These are both good ideas, but I don't eat meat and he does, so making something for both of us is always an issue. I suppose I could make something veggie and had some chicken on the side - how hard could it be to cook?
Also, between our jobs and my school, we don't have much time for hiking or anything together. I go to the gym at 5:30am, because that is my only free time - he works until 8-9pm at night most days, so it is about dark when he gets home and is too tired to get up when I do.
So frustrating!!
PSUKELLBELL 5/9/07 4:10 P
You could suggest an "active" activity that he would enjoy, such as hiking, bike riding, tennis, basketball. If he's not an outdoors-y type, you could even just walk around the mall. Maybe he just doesn't like going to the gym.
As far as eating healthy, you could make him a romantic dinner that is healthy. Maybe salad, chicken, broccoli, and a glass of wine.
RYAN8669 5/9/07 3:27 P
He does not have any kind of routine or schedule. I know that lots of people function fine without a routine, but he worries me. He works a lot of long hours, eats late into the evening, falls asleep on the couch a lot, says that he is going to come to the gym with me and then doesn't. I am concerned about his stress level, his health, his weight, his snoring, etc. I love him deeply and I want to be his wife for a really long time - I just don't want anything to happen to him and he does not take very good care of himself in times of stress.
I don't know how to talk to him about this without sounding like I want him to lose weight or that I look down on him for being over weight - I love him and I don't care how much he weighs, I just want him to be healthy and around for a long time!
