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DUBLINROSE
10/4/06 5:45 A
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Whatever you choose to do someone will have a problem with it. As long as it suits you and your happy with it who cares?
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| Quasi, that is very well put.
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QUASINORMAL
10/2/06 11:25 P
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yeah.
those women make me chuckle.
i always thought it was a little hypocritical to say that "women have their own minds, and can make their own decisions and dont need a husband"...
then, dictate how they HAVE to live their lives in accordance with the post-feminist ideology.
its just another form of dogmatic oppression.
i like to think the beauty of feminism is that we were left with the ability to form our own lives the way we want them. marriage, single, partnership, straight, gay, kids, no kids... whatever.
life is too short to get hung up on other people's decisions.
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PURPLE_OCTOPUS
10/2/06 8:03 P
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| Sorry to jump the gun there, Quasi. I've had that conversation with way too many pretentious, more-feminist-than-thou twits who have had a women's studies class or two, have read something by Mary Daly or Simone de Beauvoir, and think they're somehow "more of a woman" than everyone else. I appreciate that you weren't trying to go there.
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QUASINORMAL
10/2/06 7:11 P
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PURPLE,
simmer. i was curious...
i am not trying to be judgemental. to each their own. but seeing as i have zero interest in marriage (except for maybe immigration purposes) and i am the oldest in my family (and therefore no one has gotten married in 15 years) ... i am trying to understand it. that is all. didnt mean to offend anyone.
(thanks for explaining it CGSSYR).
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PAINTEDLADY35
10/2/06 3:03 P
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| i totally agree with you..i think marriage is the start of a new family and in changing your name(either he takes on yours or you his)it's an act of unity.that is how i feel ...
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Quasinormal, I'm not sure it's archaic, but I'm changing my name, because marriage, to me, is about starting a new family. Traditionally it's been for tracing bloodlines and such, but I like the idea of being the "so named" Family. According to an article I read, some couples take the woman's name because the groom didn't want his anymore. And some couples combine the two names to one. Whatever you sign on the legal marriage certificate is your legal name.
That's a good idea to reserve my new email address with my married name. I need to check on that.
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JOYFULSERENITY
10/2/06 11:38 A
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Gunnar,
You can change your name legally and still use another name professionally. Think about all of the celebraties(sp) that do it... I also have several friends who have done this... it's not a big deal whatsoever!
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PURPLE_OCTOPUS
10/2/06 9:50 A
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| Because it's my name and I can do what I want with it. No one is putting a gun to your head. If you don't want to, don't change it.
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QUASINORMAL
10/2/06 2:08 A
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hmmmm.
i get that my lack of desire to get married is out of the norm... (its politically and socially motivated).
but, isnt it a little archaic and misogynistic (not to mention creepily possessive) to change your name to the mans?
although it may sound this way, im not being judgemental. i have my mothers birth name. ive never known anything otherwise... im more curious and confused.
why do women still change their names?
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| i also want to open an email account wt my future new name. i will not use the old name in my email accounts after i change it legally
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PURPLE_OCTOPUS
10/1/06 1:38 P
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My current last name is from my late husband, whom I lost to cancer 8 years ago. It sounds like a first name that could be for either gender, so I am taking it as a middle name and taking my fiance's name as my last name. I'm dropping my current middle name altogether. My fiance is very supportive of this, because he understands that a part of me will always love my late husband.
I haven't practiced, but I have opened a gmail account that I'm not using yet just so that I could make sure I got my name.
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PAINTEDLADY35
10/1/06 8:48 A
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| i'm changing my name..my name is so plain and his is so exotic...silly right? but it will also make me feel more like a family which is the whole point...
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| well i have a cousin and my grandma (frm my father's side) always says that he is going to keep the family's name "out there" and me, as a girl, i am worthless. needless to say i can't wait to change the name b/c i really don't like it. it sounds Hungarian while i am Romanian! at least now i'll only have "normal" letter in my name.
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| I have mostly women in my family too! That's a neat idea to pass on a family name.
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DUBLINROSE
9/29/06 11:45 A
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I've decided not to change my name cause if I do I'll have the same name as his mother and that would be just too strange ! Plus I much prefer my name to his.
All my married friends though use their maiden names for work but have changed over to their married names for everything else.
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I tried to write what my new name will be but I found it very hard to do cause in work at the mo I have a signature which I write at the bottom of the letters I send out, but my new name just can't be done.
Will be taking a lot more practise and thinking about this one
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| I come from a family of girls as well, three of us. There's only one male cousin out of eight so I feel bad about not carrying on the name as well. If I have a son I would like to give him my maiden name as his middle name.
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BRIDE2BEE
9/23/06 12:05 P
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This is a fun question.
I haven't 'officially' started practicing, but shortly after we were engaged I was out with my sister at lunch and when the bill came, I signed my first name, then started signing his last name.
She thought it was cute, but it kind of freaked me out.
I think part of the reason that happened is when we go grocery shopping we always use the self check out, and while he's at the end of the aisle bagging our stuff, he gives me his credit card to pay and I end up signing his name.
Overall though, I think I'll take his last name, even though it makes me a little sad to give up mine since I come from a family of all girls, so it's kind of the 'end of the line' for my family name.
My middle name is my mom's first name though, so there will still be a 'family connection.'
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| I haven't decided what I am going to do about my last name because my son has my last name and I don't want him to have a different name than I do. I have thought about hyphenating especially since I hate my middle name and never use it anyway except as an initial which is how my checks and ID are printed.
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| I don't think it's weird at all. A lot of actress change their names legally when they wed but still use their maiden names as their stage names. But since you're only be practicing for such a short time, relative to all the years you'll be married, you may just want to change it both personally and professionally.
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| I am planning on changing my name but, I just graduated w/ a doctorate and opened my office. I don't get married for 10 months. Is is weird to change my name personally but not professionally? Is that even possible? I don't want to confuse everyone, But his last name is LOOOONNNGGGGG
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| I had never thought of using my surname as my middle name... It's a really good idea...
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| I have thoght about it, but I dont want to jinx it!!
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| I'll be marrying my best friend since 5th grade's younger brother. We were out the other day and she was like, "practice signing your name" so I did and she ended up giving me advice on how to sign it. ;) It's seriously kind of hard, though - my family name is all flowy with vowels and "soft" letters - his has a lot of consonants (sp?) and ends in an "n". Going to be hard to get used to...
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PALOUSEPONY13
9/12/06 8:57 P
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| I didn't practice too much - but it took me 3 months after changing my name to get used to it! Finally it looks like a natural signature.
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| When I get married I want to make my maiden name my second legal middle name. But I will just use my maiden name as my middle initial in documents. I don't want to hyphenate.
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SCHEEL1430
9/12/06 10:20 A
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| ha! this is too cute. i just realized that when i was younger and had crushes or boyfriends i would always sign my name with their last name, but i haven't once practiced writing or signing my name with my soon-to-be last name. i will start today. i'm planning on dropping my middle name, moving my maiden name to my middle name and taking his last name. i will sign with a middle initial. i can't wait to take his name. i think it's really neat.
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Hello Ladies,
I am planning on hyphenating my last names. I already have 2 middle names so I am looking for ways to abbreviate or shorten my signiture. I will have 5 names in total. I know that in Canada you can use any name that you have had since birth at any time. I was married for 12 years until I got divorced last June. I asked for a name change in my papers through Supreme Court and was told that I didn't need one. Even after I am married I don't have to legally change my name (unless it is hyphenated, since 9-11 occured) I can even use my ex's last name after I am married. I was very confused on that information and called vital statistics and they comfirmed it.
Michelle
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| my acting teacher's sirname is Dima, which is my name after the wedding
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I used to work with a girl at McDonalds who's name was what my married name will be... Isn't that strange??
Has that happened to anyone else?
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Hi!
I'm practicing, but we eloped in August (having a ceremony for family in November) so as soon as I get all the paperwork back from the state, his name will be my name.
Trying to get used to it in the interim -- same starting initial, but shorter and ends with a 'd', and I'm used to scrawling out an 'r'.
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| i practiced today LOL he saw it and laughed little . hihihi i gotta get used to it cause it's weird. lol i love his last name though
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| I never written it out. I will be taking his last name. I should start to practice when I get bored at work
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CERACOBBLER
9/7/06 1:11 P
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i keep thinking about sitting down and doing that but keep forgetting. :)
i still dont know how im going to be doing this name change thing. i really want to keep mine.
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