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WHITECAT19's Photo WHITECAT19 SparkPoints: (55,220)
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3/31/15 12:34 A

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A true friend thinks you're a good egg, even if you're slightly cracked.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/30/15 5:53 P

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What can you hold in your right hand that you can't hold in your left hand?

Your left elbow!

Edited by: PICKIE98 at: 3/30/2015 (17:53)
SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

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3/29/15 4:20 P

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What do you call a rabbit that is angry over getting burnt? A hot cross bunny.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/29/15 1:05 P

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What word begins with an E, ends with an E, but only has one letter?

Envelope

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

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3/28/15 12:29 A

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I saw this one on a Sparker's blog and just have to share it:

Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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WICKEDMELISSA's Photo WICKEDMELISSA Posts: 297
3/27/15 9:17 P

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A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."

Pain is temporary quitting lasts forever!


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3/27/15 5:27 P

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How did the Vikings send secret messages? By Norse code!


The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/26/15 4:41 P

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Susie: "Scientists who launch rockets into space must be very intelligent."

Tommy: "I don't think so, they can't even count correctly. They always get the numbers backwards."

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

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3/25/15 12:07 A

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My favorite rapper is the Easter Bunny. He's really into hip-hop.

emoticon emoticon

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/24/15 4:44 P

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What do you get when you cross a centipede with a parrot?
A walkie-talkie.

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WICKEDMELISSA's Photo WICKEDMELISSA Posts: 297
3/24/15 2:26 A

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I decided to make my password "incorrect"

because if I type it in wrong, my computer will remind me, "Your password is incorrect."

Pain is temporary quitting lasts forever!


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3/24/15 2:20 A

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What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?

It gets toad away.

Pain is temporary quitting lasts forever!


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3/23/15 9:48 P

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/23/15 3:08 P

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Middle age is having the choice of two temptations and choosing the one that will get you home earlier.

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

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3/22/15 2:00 P

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What do you call a funny chicken? A comdeihen.


emoticon emoticon

Edited by: WHITECAT19 at: 3/22/2015 (14:01)
The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/22/15 9:38 A

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Timmy: "My uncle can play the piano by ear."

Tommy: "That's nothing. My uncle fiddles with his whiskers."

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3/21/15 8:09 A

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For dinner they eat:Bristle sprouts

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3/21/15 12:11 A

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What do hedgehogs eat for breakfast? Prickled eggs.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/20/15 6:45 A

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Eclipse: What a gardener does to a hedge.

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I-AM-BUBBLES's Photo I-AM-BUBBLES Posts: 37
3/19/15 10:17 P

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What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.


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3/19/15 7:10 A

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The only thing worse than hearing the alarm clock in the morning is not hearing it. emoticon

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3/18/15 11:38 P

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These are awesome! I know because I'm laughing out loud emoticon
I'll round up some too.
He who laughs, lasts.

"Optimism is the foundation of courage."
--Nicholas Murray Butler


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3/18/15 2:13 P

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Sign in an optometrist's office: IF YOU DON'T SEE WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR, YOU'RE IN THE RIGHT PLACE!

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3/17/15 10:15 P

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Hee, hee, hee!

Why did the elephant sit on the marshmallow? So he wouldn't fall in the hot chocolate!

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/16/15 6:31 P

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What is the difference between a flea and an elephant? A n elephant can hav efleas, but a flea can't have elephants.

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3/15/15 11:47 P

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Do you iron your 4-leaf clovers? You'll be pressing your luck if you do!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/14/15 7:16 P

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Humorous error in newspaper headline: NIGHT SCHOOL TO HEAR PEST TALK

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3/14/15 12:09 A

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Have you heard about the new app to prospect for gold? You should downlode it!

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/13/15 6:47 P

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Mother (noticing the clothes lying on the floor): "Who didn't hang up his clothes when he went to bed?"

Oliver (in a muffled voice from under the covers): "Adam."
emoticon

Edited by: PICKIE98 at: 3/13/2015 (18:47)
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3/12/15 11:06 P

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Why do the Irish wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day? Because they aren't as heavy as real rocks.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/12/15 3:31 P

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Ambition may be all right, but it sure can get a fellow into a lot of hard work.

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3/11/15 6:36 P

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Sign on the back of a stock truck: Caution! Floor may be covered with political speeches!

(Sorry I've been MIA. Coughing and feeling pretty rough.)

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/11/15 5:37 P

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The grasshopper is something of a singer, but the potato bug is the most indefatigable musician. He plays on the tuber

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3/9/15 4:48 P

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Bulldozer:Someone who can sleep through a campaign speech.

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3/7/15 8:39 A

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Some people pay their bills when they are due, some when they are overdue, and some never do.

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3/5/15 6:12 P

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Susie: (reading the newspaper) "Daddy, what kind of robber is a page?"
Daddy: "A what?"
Susie: "It says here that two pages held up a bride's train."
emoticon

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3/3/15 6:45 P

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Unfortunately for us, not far enough over that Hill.

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3/3/15 3:25 P

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Old senators never die; they just go over the Hill.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/2/15 2:51 P

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Tom:"What's your son going to be when he finishes college?"

Tim: "An octogenarian, I think."

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RACHAELANN810's Photo RACHAELANN810 Posts: 196
3/2/15 10:46 A

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LOVE these! Thanks for making my morning a little brighter everyone!

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3/1/15 7:37 P

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What do you call a pig in a rickshaw? Pulled pork.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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3/1/15 4:33 P

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Yup!

Criticism wouldn't be so hard to take if it weren't so often right.

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2/28/15 12:23 P

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When the TV repairman got married, the reception was excellent.

(Are there even TV repairmen any more?)

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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2/28/15 10:17 A

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You're over the hill when, instead of walking over and changing the TV channel, you spend 15 minutes looking for the remote.

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2/27/15 11:23 P

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My high school music teacher got fired for making us read band books.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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2/26/15 3:58 P

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Probably from people tickling his ivories...
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SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

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2/25/15 7:29 P

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My mate swallowed a key-board. Now he has irritable vowel syndrome.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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2/24/15 2:12 P

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Twins:Womb-mates. emoticon

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

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2/24/15 2:12 P

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Ewwwwwwww,,,,, yoxi-booly!

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

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2/23/15 9:50 P

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My cousin stared at his belly button so much, his boss promoted him to navel officer.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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2/22/15 6:30 P

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Nudity: A one-button suit!

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

Lost 66 pounds!



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2/22/15 1:58 A

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Inflation, inflation . . . I went to buy a new comforter for the bed, and even down was up!

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


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2/21/15 7:00 P

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My yard is filled with drifts.. and snow piles and ice,,, and more snow...

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

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2/21/15 1:53 A

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I hope these nasty old snow storms don't get so bad that they cause a continental drift!

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The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


 Pounds lost: 0.0 
 
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PICKIE98's Photo PICKIE98 SparkPoints: (314,488)
Fitness Minutes: (191,377)
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2/20/15 2:25 P

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A taxpayer is a person who has the government on his payroll.

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SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

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2/20/15 11:29 A

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But it's so quiet in the bowling alley that you can hear a pin drop!

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The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


 Pounds lost: 0.0 
 
0
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PICKIE98's Photo PICKIE98 SparkPoints: (314,488)
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Posts: 27,072
2/19/15 6:34 P

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The one thing harder than sticking to a diet is keeping quiet about it.

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

Lost 66 pounds!



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2/17/15 10:06 P

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And the tailor is in stitches over your joke!

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


 Pounds lost: 0.0 
 
0
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PICKIE98's Photo PICKIE98 SparkPoints: (314,488)
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2/17/15 2:46 P

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That joke is "tailor-made'!

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

Lost 66 pounds!



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2/16/15 5:19 P

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A P.I. trailed the lawyer after court was out. He had to follow suit.

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


 Pounds lost: 0.0 
 
0
12.875
25.75
38.625
51.5
PICKIE98's Photo PICKIE98 SparkPoints: (314,488)
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Posts: 27,072
2/16/15 3:51 P

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Judge: "Have you ever appeared before this court in any other suit?"

Lawyer: "Why, yes--the navy pinstripe."

SIX YEARS SPARKING!!

Lost 66 pounds!



Total SparkPoints: 314,488
 
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2/15/15 11:51 P

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If your doctor is a quack, you have every right to duck her on the bill.

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The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

A monk was once asked: What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again. - Tito Colliander

The Jesus Prayer helps to lift the whole life, body and soul, to a level where . . . the world is sought and known in the beauty of God, not God in the beauty of the world. - Mother Maria of Normanby


 Pounds lost: 0.0 
 
0
12.875
25.75
38.625
51.5
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