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SWEETLILBLUEYES's Photo SWEETLILBLUEYES SparkPoints: (13,476)
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7/14/14 6:30 P

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So, depression. Problems. I obsess about problems. Old ones, new one, ones that might happen, ones that might not. It keeps me up at night. It seems I just can't let go. Of even little things. I worry about every little detail until an issue is resolved. Seriously, it is exhausting. I cry all the time and feel extremely overwhelmed by so many small things. I feel like I just can't get a grip. I need to find a way to deal with regular life. I just don't know why it is so hard for me. I resent being the "responsible" one. The problem solver, the money saver, the bill payer. Just once, I wonder what it would be like to be irresponsible. To let someone else take over. To just not care. To sleep all night. That's what I'm thinking about today.

One day at a time.

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal.
It is the courage to continue that matters!'


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JEFFJAPAN SparkPoints: (1,479)
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7/14/14 6:07 P

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Stillmenewbody...trust i've got a lot of sometimes you've got tolet go and let God....at least that's what mother says...i say that's easier said than done...but ruminating about a problem only seems to make it worse in my head. Question, do you trust yourself?
I know i don't. Even though don't have any reason not to...i suppose that's why we have a dealiing with deppression forum...
Now I'm just rambling.

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7/14/14 5:49 P

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My depression, diabetes, and melas are interfering with my love life or causing a lack there of....on the rare occasion i can actually get a date ...i can't seem to get second one. Plus it's exhausting trying to pretend that you're a functional adult when you're struggling with health issues.
I can't seem to enjoy anything in life right now. ”i am human and i need to be loved just like everybody else does“‐from How Soon is Now by the Smiths

STILLMENEWBODY's Photo STILLMENEWBODY SparkPoints: (3,896)
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7/14/14 5:18 P
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change of heart

Edited by: STILLMENEWBODY at: 7/14/2014 (18:24)
KEEP ON KEEPING ON! I CAN DO IT!


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7/14/14 4:43 P
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made a mistake

Edited by: STILLMENEWBODY at: 7/14/2014 (18:25)
KEEP ON KEEPING ON! I CAN DO IT!


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CHRISTINACOFFEE's Photo CHRISTINACOFFEE SparkPoints: (2,009)
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6/18/14 11:44 A

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Anything you need I am here. We are all together in this.

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6/12/14 10:16 A

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JeffJapan, I sent you a private message emoticon

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6/12/14 10:00 A

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I can relate. I've had low grade chronic depression for most of my life... but it's gotten worse since last fall, when a good friend died of a sudden heartattack and my fiancee left me...then i found out i had diabetes and was hospitalized for 2weeks during which time i was replaced at work i had been unemployed for five months my new job is two hours a way so.o i get up at 430am. I also took 50000yen or about 500usdollars cut in pay per month. The i got rejected by a good friend.
I'm trying lots of anti depressants.
What're you doing to deal with your depression?


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6/12/14 9:27 A

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I suffer from emotional depression. emoticon

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6/12/14 9:26 A

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Christinacoffee. What brings such a nice girl to a depression forum anyway?

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6/12/14 9:20 A

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Christinacoffee. What brings such a nice girl to a depression forum anyway?

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6/12/14 8:07 A

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Okay emoticon

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6/12/14 8:05 A

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Thank you. I really needed to hear that. Perhaps there is hope after all.

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6/12/14 7:56 A

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Anything you need I am here. We are all together in this.

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6/12/14 7:54 A

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Thank you. I really needed to hear that. Perhaps there is hope after all.

CHRISTINACOFFEE's Photo CHRISTINACOFFEE SparkPoints: (2,009)
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6/12/14 7:48 A

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It is just the truth. Just cause someone friendzoned you, it does not erase your right to life and love

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6/12/14 7:39 A

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Thank you. I really needed to hear that. Perhaps there is hope after all.

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6/12/14 6:42 A

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My profession is relevant to medicine so I know what you are talking about. Still it does not remove you the right to have a relationship.

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6/11/14 6:51 P

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Its not just diabetes im my case. I also have Melas mitochondria myopathy encephelopathy with lactic acidosis and stoke-like symptoms. It. Causes low levels of ATP ‐(energy)production, throughout the entire body. It causes depression, diabetes, hearing loss, blindness It's a rare genetic disease. Its noncurable nontreatable and its progressive. Last.fall i had one of those stroke like episodes and have forgotten half my Japanese. Now people are laughing at my poor Japanese i've been living in japan for 13years. Not the girl who rejected me though. She was the only one who noticed when i disappeared for a few weeks when i was hospitalzed with diabetes.

CHRISTINACOFFEE's Photo CHRISTINACOFFEE SparkPoints: (2,009)
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6/11/14 6:14 P

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Don't let the fact that you are diabetic effect you so much..... It is not fair to yourself.

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6/11/14 6:07 P

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...thanks...ありがӗ
2;う。

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6/11/14 5:53 P

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I am sorry it turned out like that but is better to tell someone how you feel even if you get rejected. You were very brave.

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6/11/14 5:47 P

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Yes i have now i'm not in the friend zone anymore...i'm in i think we should't see each other zone

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6/11/14 1:51 P

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Certainly not. And being diabetic is not a reason not to be loved. You told her your feelings?

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6/5/14 6:02 P

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Still stuck in the friend zone. Can't blame her for not wanting to be with a depressed diabetic foreigner. Feeling unloved. Are depressed diabetic foreigners worthy of love and affection in Japan?

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5/8/14 10:47 P

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Dealing.. but barely.

Edited by: FANNYMANSON at: 5/9/2014 (14:00)
Feed your head.


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PAPABOB2012 Posts: 225
3/17/14 12:52 P

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Hang in there and keep your head high and your smile bright emoticon

YAEME79's Photo YAEME79 Posts: 396
3/12/14 1:49 A

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Just an amateur suggestion consider getting the divorce and you could still not date yet. Just date your self! Really get to know you and work on transforming you into the person u want to be. emoticon

Always move forward


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JOSIEG74's Photo JOSIEG74 SparkPoints: (971)
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3/10/14 2:31 P

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I thought my marriage was fine myself. I suffered MST while serving but never thought anything was wrong. I had PTSD and when my husband saw what I was dealing with he quit the marriage. It was "too hard" for him. We have been separated 5 years, I still haven't filed for divorce, because I am afraid to date. Part of it is the MST, but a lot is because after what happened I allowed myself (and encouraged) to gain weight. I am in treatment, but it's really hard to even think about going out there again. And the only men that seem interested creep me out, or they are only into big girls, so they wouldn't be good for my weight loss.

I am looking for people who deal with the daily depression of wanting to hide behind the weight, and be of it at the same time.

Hope is never lost, it is only misplaced.


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YAEME79's Photo YAEME79 Posts: 396
3/8/14 7:10 P

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moonlitmuse and krando1; I have been in a similar relationship that you describe. My ex husband whom I met in basic training had some issues; and with me having my own it was really hard to deal with. For 3 years I played w/ the idea of leaving him. Actually packed up and moved once; but 4 yrs ago I did it for good. I never got deployed while I was in the Army but he did twice and came back w/ nightmares and even more controlling than he was before. We went to marriage counseling just to be kicked out. The therapist looked at me after a couple of months and said he is not cooperating; he won't even practice basic communication and I don';t think anything is gonna change and you should think about divorce. Which was true b/c on our way to the 1st session he told me a list of things I was not allowed to talk about. I am now broke and living w/ my mom but in many ways soooo much happier.

Always move forward


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KRAND01's Photo KRAND01 SparkPoints: (896)
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2/23/14 9:00 P

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I've had no luck with relationships. Got divorced because my ex kept cheating on me, was emotionally and physically abusive to my son, and "Never loved me in the first place." Even with all that I was willing to work on the relationship with a marriage councler on her request, but she wouldn't say anything or be truthful in the sessions.
What finally got me to divorce her was her best friend getting fed up and telling me everything she had done behind my back, as well as the fact that she had divorce papers filled out and had been talked into taking full legal and physical custody.
The next day I got my own papers with full custody and she signed them without even a complaint or question. This was when my son was 8 months old.
This really put me into a deep depression where life was taking care of his needs, sleeping and working, doing it all mostly while not thinking or trying to feel. I then tried dating, the first date I had was from work, and she moved 2 days later to NY without telling me.
Then I dated a few other women over the next 2 years but each time they would loose intrest once I told them I was a single father of a very young son. After the last one I decided that all this up and down and splitting myself between my son and new relationships wasn't good for my son and decided to give him all of my attention.
Now I'm 40, son is in his late teens and the last few years I have thought of not wanting to be alone anymore, but it seems extremely hard to meet people at this age if you don't go to bars. Everything that is set up to meet others to create friendships is geared to 20 year olds.

MOONLITMUSE's Photo MOONLITMUSE SparkPoints: (9,606)
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2/15/14 8:59 A

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I'm not sure if I should be posting this on this forum or if I should start a new...but here's my story (in a nutshell)

2005: Met my future bf and started establishing friendship
2006: Started dating, got pregnant
2007: BF went to Utah for a job, met another girl, left me for her, my son was born
2008 - 2013: Dated my ex, not a healthy relationship (lots of mental abuse)
2013 - Present: Got back with my son's father when he came back from Georgia

So that timeline being given, I should note that he is a former Marine and is an Iraq combat veteran. He discovered that he suffers from PTSD which explained a lot of his "running away" from problems. Well, we've been together for a year now and I've been finding myself going in and out of cycles of deep depression. Lately, with not having been at work for a month, I've had too much time to spend in my own head. I find myself thinking about his past relationships and worrying that I'm not as good as them, that he's only with me out of some sort of weird obligation. He's not the most affectionate or reassuring, but he's incredibly busy with finishing his degree so I figure that's probably why.

I guess this is my ultimate question - how should I handle this? There's much more to what's going on in my head, but the gist is that I just worry about things a lot and don't feel good enough and that I'm just here because it's easy. Should I just wait for this to pass, or what? I don't want to bother him with my pettiness, but at the same time I just need some sort of reassurance.

Any help would be much appreciated

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2/10/14 12:27 P

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that is great you found someone that is there for you and that you happy keep on rocking emoticon

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2/10/14 2:13 A

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Stay busy with things that will MAKE you get out of bed. When you can get in to see your doctor and let him know how you are doing. I will admit though it would be nice to be able to just chill during this cold, dark, and damp weather, but it is healthier to stay active. Best wishes in reaching all of your goals.

HUGS
Pam

Co-Leader of the Fitness Instructors Team
Senior Moderator of the Dealing with Depression Team

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
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I am not a medical professional or a trained counselor. Please seek professional advice about treatment options.

"The reason people find it so hard to be happy is they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be."
-Marc Pagnol
FRANKIEKNIGHT2's Photo FRANKIEKNIGHT2 Posts: 71
2/4/14 2:44 P

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This weather is causing me to be depressed and I want to stay in bed and not get out. I did not even get out of bed yesterday...I had to get out today and head to school and work so needless to say I had no choice but to get out of bed.

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HOPEFOLLOWS's Photo HOPEFOLLOWS SparkPoints: (1,435)
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1/10/14 10:13 P

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It's tough being in that insecure feeling place but I learned the hard way that I have to focus on myself and doing all I can to take good care of me. I have had PTSD and depression all my life but it gets better every day. When I remind myself that every person comes into our life for a reason and there is always a gift and a lesson in every challenging situation it helps me focus on the positive of the experience. I was busy with my career and building a good life for myself for a number of years and didn't date during that time. In the past year I've had two relationships and realize that even though neither relationship worked out I have learned so much about myself as a result. I am better and stronger for the experiences, love my life and am looking forward to a bright future even though I have had some real struggles recently that include a breakup and losing the person I thought was my best friend to my ex. Try to keep your focus on yourself (and it isn't being selfish to take care of you) and doing all you can to develop your self-love and build your self-esteem. Many Blessings.

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OKIE_NANA's Photo OKIE_NANA Posts: 277
12/20/13 12:51 P

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Tell him you would really like it if he flirted with you. If he doesn't like the idea, he may not be worth the effort. Some people automatically flirt when they meet each other. It is not a big deal to them but others might be hurt. My husband flirts with babies and small children. He teases me about flirting with younger men I've known since they were pre-teens.

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JOKERSBABGIRL's Photo JOKERSBABGIRL SparkPoints: (1,354)
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12/15/13 10:29 P

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I have been dealing with depression for 11 years now and every now and then it really flares up bad. I often think that I am losing everyone. The relationship I am in for the most part has been great. We have been together for a year and a half and like every couple we have had our share of ups and downs. Here recently though, I have been feeling really depressed and like I am losing him to someone else. Though he has never actually cheated on me, I caught him the other night flirting with someone on the phone. This isn't the first time I have caught him flirting but it's the first time in a long time. I love him with all of my heart and don't want to walk away just because he has a flirting issue. I just don't know what I can do to get him to see how bad it hurts me and how bad it makes me feel. I asked him that night if I wasn't good enough or if I didn't make him happy any more and he swore up and down that that was not the issue. Any suggestions?

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12/10/13 7:50 P

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ENDUROVET - my daughter-in-law has been morbidly obese and a life-long battle with depression. He adored her until he went to Afghanistan. Now he has PTSD so bad he doesn't have the energy to follow through on instructions from his therapist. It is his denial that has her considering divorce. The best I can do for them is pray and ask others to pray for them.

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YESICANYESIWILL's Photo YESICANYESIWILL SparkPoints: (7,679)
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11/22/13 1:30 P

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My husband has an affair with online poker. He plays it far into the night. There are times that I want to take that stupid smart phone and crack into pieces. See how smart it feels then!

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SONDRAC65's Photo SONDRAC65 SparkPoints: (1,881)
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11/6/13 11:50 A

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I've been in a relationship for 13 years and as of this morning he told me he is leaving instead of trying to talk our problems out. Not sure how I feel right now, kind of numb.

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DAIZYBUG's Photo DAIZYBUG SparkPoints: (10,130)
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11/6/13 10:47 A

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I totally agree! I am in my first real relationship after my divorce...almost 7 years ago! We have been together 2 years and yes there are days where I think that it is VERY hard, I know that nothing worthwhile is easy.

For those who are in relationships that are not going well, remember, YOU DESERVE THE BEST! No matter your weight, no matter if you have depression, you are a wonderful person. Never sell yourself short because of the choices others make

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11/1/13 9:40 P

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Im no expert in relationships but I know one thing that if you both love each other with all your heart then you both will find a way to stick together. I have always believed that we are put to a test some of us last and some of us dont... Does it mean that we fail..NO it just means that though we love this person we were not ment to be more then friends. Time can only tell what lays a head....

The best way to get through things together is to stick together,communicate about every thing how you both feel what you both want and need, Listen to each other,Respect each other not as a half but as a whole, and you cant forget LOVE!!!

I hope this kinda helps anyone out there!! and best wishes and wellness to all

ENDUROVET's Photo ENDUROVET Posts: 163
10/26/13 9:48 P

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Hello everyone, I hope this thread is still active! I don't know where else to post...
(I've blogged a lot so if anyone requests it I will add as SparkFriend. I'm really paranoid about ex-husband or minions finding info on my Spark account)

I just learned that 2nd husband (11 yrs) is having emotional affair w/someone I never heard of, this person named Edwina G!?!?!? It feels like déjà vu all over again, since Ex also took up with & eventually left me for an older woman. I know it's not much fun being married to an obese middle-aged veterinarian who struggles w/chronic depression & is "drawn & quartered" on a daily basis between work, childcare, looking after aging parents, w/marriage coming in a distant 4th place. I may be getting exactly what I deserve, but it sucks for my depressive state. As I've told my husband when we've tried to hash things out in the past, it isn't as if I've ever misrepresented who I am or what I do!

Thanks for listening,
Val

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GRUNGEGODDESS's Photo GRUNGEGODDESS SparkPoints: (15,285)
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9/18/13 7:23 P

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Hi everyone. I am 28 and was with my high school sweetheart from 16 to 24 and we have a 9 year old son together. I am only just now consistently dating someone. We are going on our 4th date Friday and have texted everyday since the beginning of May. My ex's mother died Saturday after being in the hospital for a month. I was still very close to her. I was holding her hand when she died. I have been on the right med cocktail for 2 years. Only extreme stress brings on real depression and anxiety, such as what went on with MIL. I get a little clingy and weird when I am under extreme stress because my ex and I had a VERY messed up and codependent relationship and this was something major to go through on my own. I think I have done some damage with my new guy. I want to explain to him why I have been the way I've been lately, but I am scared to be that vulnerable and let someone in again. My ex saw me at my worst and still says I was just lazy. My new guy is joining the Marines in a year. He said we are going to have a talk on our date because he thinks him being in the Marines will be a prob for me.... Maybe I should just see how that conversation goes and go from there. I really like him...

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HOLLYSNOWWOMAN's Photo HOLLYSNOWWOMAN Posts: 2,364
9/12/13 5:39 P

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I had a 5 yr relationship with a man who has to travel a lot. Anyway I found out abt his drinking problem and the questions I could never figure out became crystal clear. The same day I was channel surfing and stopped to listen to Dr. Phil which I never watch. He told this woman that she was in love with the man she wanted him to be. The more I thought abt this I had to agree. I broke off my relationship and feel much better with myself now. I may be alone now but that is ok too. I did not realize how is behavior was effecting me.

Edited by: HOLLYSNOWWOMAN at: 9/12/2013 (17:47)
Slow but will get there!


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LIALEEPANTHER's Photo LIALEEPANTHER SparkPoints: (891)
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9/12/13 7:37 A

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Help! I need hope! If anyone's reading this. Please share the story of how you met and got together with your partner! And how you get through hard times! I'm sure a lot of us could do with the inspiration!

-Lia Lee :]
DAYTEC Posts: 13
8/14/13 10:48 A

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Thanks for the advice Vic,
We are trying to set aside a date time each month to help renew things.
His anger issues are due to life happening, alcohol isn't involved. He refuses counseling. He says when he goes to talk to a counselor that he will just say what he is suppose to say, not what he needs to say. I don't know if this is a passive/aggressive behavior. His home life as a child was not good. His mother was an undiagnosed bipolar so things we very rocky.

I would love a getaway, but work and money seem to be the main issue. I guess it is setting our relationship as priority.
Thanks again for your insight

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THEPOWERGUY's Photo THEPOWERGUY Posts: 697
8/13/13 2:01 P

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Hi Daytec;

My thinking of this has a couple of different aspects on this. It all depends on several different causes of the issues involved.

For instance what is the cause or trigger of your husbands 'Anger Issues' is it just life getting to him, what he was exposed to when he was a child, or can it be some sort of drinking issue. Keep in mind I am not accusing or such just know several people that have different triggers for their anger. My Best Friends Husband and My own Mother have anger issues when they start drinking, but my Dad and I get anger issues when life starts getting to us. So you see where I'm going here.

If it's life getting to him counseling is a very good start but I would also suggest a 'Getaway' for you two. Sometimes Mom & Dad need an Adults Only Getaway to keep everything happy. I understand that this might be a bit tuff because of most of your friends & family being so far away. But you can make it a way where your family has time to reconnect with your kids as well. You can talk to family members as if they can watch the kids while you and your husband try to work on your marriage. Maybe it's just me and how my family is but we are always willing to take care of each others kids while the adults try and take care of themselves for a while. With your children being 12 & 14 there should be little issue of them traveling alone on train or plane if needed. With the children gone you two can work on your issues and be like you were when the kids weren't around. (Let's face it, all of us acted different before our kids were involved LOL!) Sometimes that is all that is needed is a little bit of personal time that lets everyone forget about things (for lack of a better term) for a little while.

If it's a drinking issue again counseling is a good start, but only you, your husband, and his therapist can figure what type of treatment is best.

I home this is helpful.

Vic (aka ThePowerGuy)

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DAYTEC Posts: 13
8/13/13 12:46 P

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Hi everyone, been with SP a few years, but just now getting with the program.
I am having relationship difficulties and wanted advice.
I am 47 married, with 2 kids(14 and 12). We have been married for 15 years, but the spark is going. I have been depressed with my weight and feeling like a failure in my goals in life. He has had anger issues which we have gone to counselling for. It has helped, but there is still some tension, at least on my side, of not rocking the boat and causing conflict.
He loves me and does try in his own way. I find myself missing the connection we had and wondering if it is still there, or with someone else. I don't want to ruin my marriage. I use to put a lot of effort into date nights, talks, etc. but have just stopped because he wasn't giving as much to the development of our marriage as I was. I have become stubborn in giving as I feel it is one sided.
I just feel so alone. Most of my friends and family are hundreds of miles away. I feel lonely and stuck.
Any advice would be great

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WORKOUTWITHPAM's Photo WORKOUTWITHPAM Posts: 133,481
7/28/13 6:30 P

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I hope you will make new friends and acquaintances when you get started in your classes or through AA. Nothing says that our friends HAVE to be in our own age group. Friends can be older or younger. I think what's more important is that we share common interests with our friends and also in relationships.

We all have a few faults that we could stand to work on, I am sure. Great attitude you have about that! Best Wishes in reaching all of your goals. Take care, and keep in touch.

HUGS
Pam

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I am not a medical professional or a trained counselor. Please seek professional advice about treatment options.

"The reason people find it so hard to be happy is they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be."
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7/28/13 6:21 P

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Ya, he was a lesson learned!

In the last town I was in (Denton, TX) I had a good support system (AA) and a few close friends I met through that system, but since I moved back in with my parents last month (in Temple, TX) I don't have anyone to hang out with these days. I am starting classes in the fall, though only part-time, and am still looking for a job. Perhaps I will meet new people to hang out with through that or through AA--though it is much smaller with hardly anyone close to my age group here.

Thank you! ::hugs:: I will. I know I have many faults that prevents me from sustaining long relationships and friendships, but I aim on working on correcting those faults.

Cassandra


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7/28/13 5:50 P

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Ouch! Sorry about the way your last 'relationship' ended. That guy sounds like he 'looked better going than coming!'

You are wise to 'get stable again' before getting into a relationship, however, that doesn't mean that you have to also be "LONELY!" Do you have girlfriends with whom you can go out and do fun things? Are there any young children in your family that you can spend quality time with? Are there any facilities in your area where you might offer your services as a volunteer? Since you are looking for a job, volunteering often leads to being employed by that business or in a similar line of work.

Whatever you do, I wish you the best of luck for a bright and successful future. Take care, and keep in touch.

HUGS
Pam

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ndividual.asp?gid=953


I am not a medical professional or a trained counselor. Please seek professional advice about treatment options.

"The reason people find it so hard to be happy is they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be."
-Marc Pagnol
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7/28/13 1:19 P

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I have very limited experience in relationships. The longest I've ever had with someone is a month or two. Most of the time it is a week or a one-night stand, even though I usually want more.

I tend to pick all the wrong ones, too. The last one I got friendly with (who lived in another state) was very intelligent, we talked a lot (well, he did most of the time), we were both in AA, he was going to school to be a drug counselor (he thought he'd be good since he's an 'experienced' drug addict). Then he 'relapsed', told me he was suicidal and that he might 'off' himself very soon, and that if he did--to please contact his parents..but in the meantime...don't tell anyone...

That night I had the worst panic attack for 8+ hours straight. My sponsor came over and sat with me all night, then took me to the hospital. The guy, Noah, eventually told me he was 'getting' help from his sponsor, didn't bother to ask if I was okay, didn't bother with updating how he was doing.

After that he only talked about himself, his ex-girlfriend that he hated, asked for prayers when he needed help and got cold with me when he got what he wanted. I ended up telling one person about the suicide bit, because I need to talk about it, get it off my chest. Noah found out I told someone, called me up while he was high, asked me for an apology and to remedy the situation.

Soon afterwards, he broke up our friendship, calling me immature, and wouldn't tell me what it was I did that was so 'wrong'.

I would much rather be single and lonely for the rest of my life than to get emotionally involved in another 'friendship' like that one. The others weren't quite that bad, but some were not much better!

These days, I'm not even interested in going on a date with anyone. I just don't wanna. I know in time I'll give it another go, but I'm afraid of that kind of pain and disappointment, especially during a fragile time of my life. Most likely, I'll jump back into the dating scene after I get myself a job and get stable again.

Cassandra


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WORKOUTWITHPAM's Photo WORKOUTWITHPAM Posts: 133,481
7/22/13 12:45 A

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You are very welcome, YAEME79.

As soon as someone wants money it is time to say, "See Ya!" and Move On! I let one guy borrow $80 just 'until payday.' LOL...I never saw the money OR the guy again! Lesson Learned!

Good luck to both of you. I am at the age where I am totally happy being alone without being in a relationship. I was married for 35 years and separated for 5 more years, and I've had way more than my share of marital up and downs. I love my divorced life...I AM FREE! WHAT could be better that THAT?

HUGS
Pam

Co-Leader of the Fitness Instructors Team
Senior Moderator of the Dealing with Depression Team

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ndividual.asp?gid=953


I am not a medical professional or a trained counselor. Please seek professional advice about treatment options.

"The reason people find it so hard to be happy is they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be."
-Marc Pagnol
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