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FTHOODBABY's Photo FTHOODBABY Posts: 209
7/29/12 5:39 A

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We clean "Flylady style" at my house. That' s the system I use to clean house and she has a daily email called Riley Challenge for kids. Each day it tells them something to do in their room. Most challenges do not take longer than 15 minutes. My 7 year old loves cleaning this way -- and it works!

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RUMBAMEL's Photo RUMBAMEL Posts: 1,959
7/27/12 10:35 P

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Oooooh, I like the picture of the clean area idea to reference it to. Smooth move.

rumbamel

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HIPPYCHICK5005's Photo HIPPYCHICK5005 SparkPoints: (12,087)
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7/27/12 5:22 P

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My 8 and 10 year olds share a room. After a lot of frustration on both of our parts regarding whether or not a room was clean, I realized what they thought was a clean room and what I did were two different things. To help them understand what I meant by "clean your room" I helped them clean it to MY standards and then took pictures of the various areas of concern. If they ever aren't sure what needs to be done, they compare that area to the picture and it becomes completely obvious.

Still, this is a big struggle. Many mom's just close the door, but I think there is an adult lesson to be learned there.

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MJC2826 SparkPoints: (715)
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6/24/12 12:43 A

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I deal with a 9 & 11 year old girls that share a room. We have tried almost everything to keep their room tidy (I no longer shoot for clean). We use laundry baskets for most of our cleaning/organization tasks. When the room gets bad enough, I send them in with baskets to put everything on the floor into the baskets. Then one by one, we sort the baskets. Sometimes it helps just to sit in there to help keep them focused. We also let them take turns. Using a timer they get 10 minute cleaning rounds. While one is cleaning, the other is working on her desk, emptying her rack in the dishwasher or some other chore, NOT in their room. I have one who is more willing and takes less supervision than the other - it's a real challenge keeping things fair.

RUMBAMEL's Photo RUMBAMEL Posts: 1,959
6/21/12 11:17 P

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PIPPI---I like the idea of "how can I help you succeed?" That way they know you are on their side supporting them. I will have to try that.

Thanks...

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PIPPIMARRIED's Photo PIPPIMARRIED Posts: 41
6/21/12 11:06 P

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my daughters are 6 and 8 and they struggle with their room too.

Some things we do:

"You pick it up, or I do. If I do, you won't get it back."

"I will not take kids to the park if they do not have a clean room." (My youngest once answered this with "but I don't want to clean!" and I said, "I know, it's hard work, but you must not want to go to the park that badly, either."

Sometimes, when I can tell it will be a difficult cleanup struggle but BEFORE (very important) they start whining, I will go in and say: "How can I help you succeed in having a clean room today?"

Whichever I decide to implement, I have to follow through. If your child knows they can wear you down until they can get away with it, then its just more wasted energy.



Never underestimate the power of a redhead.


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QHAMOM's Photo QHAMOM Posts: 896
2/25/12 11:21 A

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There are some genetic factors with OCD, and there are also some learned behaviors. Watching Hoarders has been helpful for myself and my kids, for the motivation as well as the information and advice. None of us want to end up with a house like the ones on the TV show.

Wanda ~ 5'11", 42 y/o mom to kids ages 7, 10 and 12


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KEPETERSEN3405's Photo KEPETERSEN3405 SparkPoints: (1,877)
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2/22/12 11:42 A

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My husband and I are as guilty as the girls with keeping our rooms clean. I am trying hard to get things under control. I swear being a pack rat is hereditary. If that's the case, my kids are out of luck! I am starting to try and get better but it's not easy. I have 8, 6 and 18 weeks. By the time I get them all to bed, I'm too exhausted to do anything.

My plan is to have Saturday as major cleaning day and little things during the week. I am also going to write out my expectations so they know where I'm coming from.

Good luck!

Words to live by... "Never let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game."


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QHAMOM's Photo QHAMOM Posts: 896
12/11/11 9:33 A

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I used to keep my room a mess when I was a teenager, mainly because it was my space, I liked it that way, and it drove my mom crazy. (insert evil laugh) Figuring out the motivation behind the mess would be a good place to start. For my own kids, my 10 year old son keeps his room pretty clean. My 6 and 8 year old girls keep their room a mess. I have big plastic bins they can toss everything in and I tell them it doesn't have to be perfect, just everything off the floor so I can vacuum. The biggest problem is them yelling to me that the other one is not helping. I usually end up telling them that I'll be back in 10 minutes and they can leave anything on the floor that they want to go in the trash, but they need to pick up everything they want to keep. That solves the issue of who picks up what - they each end up picking up their own stuff.

Wanda ~ 5'11", 42 y/o mom to kids ages 7, 10 and 12


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JRICE1973 SparkPoints: (11,276)
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12/9/11 12:49 P

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I know this is an older discussion, but OMG, do we share the same kids? They are terrible packrats (girls 10 and 5, not so much my 8 yr old daughter). Papers, cool boxes or wrappers, SO MUCH STUFF and they will not pick it up, even with a reward system (money, going out to eat, toys, whatever). We have tried the Love and Logic approach, "Feel free to pick up whatever you would like to keep." Oh, the drama when they say they are done and we go in with a bag to take the rest away.....

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RUMBAMEL's Photo RUMBAMEL Posts: 1,959
8/23/11 9:28 P

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Ours have their moments, but we started them off at a very early age making sure that they understand that if they make a mess, they must clean it up afterwards. We stand there and make sure it gets done before anything else can be started. If they got out puzzles, then they must be put away before blocks get out, etc.

Just tonight my 7 yr. old daughter was about to go to sleep when I noticed she left a crafty mess on her desk (making something for a friend's birthday card. I said that I understood she wasn't finished, but we don't leave open glue and beads out. I made her put all but the card away. Then she went to bed. It took all of 5 minutes, maybe.

It also helps when everything has it's place. A box or a bin that they know where to put an item when it's done. I substitute taught at a preschool once and notices pictures on everything for a disabled child. I thought that sounded awesome for my own kids. I took pics of the items in our bins and then taped the pictures to the bins. They can't say, "I don't know where it goes....", the picture is right there. Of course, Daddy would mess it up sometimes anyway. :P

Good luck to all.

Oh, when they do fight us on it, we end up taking items away for charity or for an extended time-out.

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1FEISTYMAMA's Photo 1FEISTYMAMA SparkPoints: (37,293)
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8/20/11 10:16 P

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I have to help at least twice a year.......kids just don't see things the same way we do. Dads usually don't, either. =)



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8/20/11 6:21 P

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It so bad one time that I had to go in here and do it because she wasn't throwing anything away. My oldest had papers in there from the 1st grade. I think I might have a bigger problem then just wanting to clean her room.

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RMSALINA SparkPoints: (420)
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8/20/11 3:00 P

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My kind of momma! emoticon

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RMSALINA SparkPoints: (420)
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8/20/11 2:57 P

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WOW! My house is the same. My 8 and 3 yr old play with everything,but do not want to pick it up. I ask them to clean it up,if they don't, toys and privledges get taken away. My 8 yr old must clean her room and fold her clothes before she goes to grandma and granpa's house. Of course i help her a bit,but she must have it done before she leaves and it works!!
The lil one is more stubborn, so i take her favorite toys away until she helps her sister clean up the mess. They work as a team and it is awesome! emoticon

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MNM_MOMMA's Photo MNM_MOMMA SparkPoints: (1,077)
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8/19/11 3:08 A

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I have the same problem. My two daughters, 7 and 4, share a room. They have absolutely no problem in destroying it and it only takes about ten minutes to do so. I honestly don't know how they do it. Sometimes I think they just take all their bins and dump them on the floor. Who knows? Cleaning up the mess that THEY'VE made though, well that's just unthinkable. I've heard so many excuses but their favorites seem to be, "I can't pick it up by myself" "I need help" and my personal favorite "I wasn't playing with it, she was" when I know perfectly well they were both playing. I've tried several different things to fix this problem but so far, I've only found one that works every time. I'm a nosy mom so I have to check and see what they're doing like every five minutes or so. Then when it's time to clean up, I know what each one has played with and who dumped what. We now have the rule that if you drag it out, you pick it up. So when the oldest says that she can't pick up by herself, all I have to ask is "Were you playing by yourself?" The answer is usually yes and she figures out she's pretty much stuck with picking it up by herself.

A diamond with a flaw is worth more than a pebble without imperfections.

To know the road ahead, ask those coming back.


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DILNJAAN SparkPoints: (897)
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8/18/11 1:51 P

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i go through the same problem @ my house between my 3 yrs and 8 yrs, when i tell my 8yr old to clean her room, well everything is in closet in pal and pals of clothes, in drawer without folding them. under the bed if no room to put them any where, i have to go through her room, cleaning every 2 weeks, throwing away clothes, trash that she hides under her bed, when i'm tired of yelling at her . her grand mother is visiting us , and shares room with her, even she is tired of picking after her. i just don't know what to do anymore . ?????
i just brought her new clothes for school, guess what she can not find half of it already........, or when time to do homework she can not find half of her stuff, since she puts them every where.
every time when i tell her to clean her room, well she complains that my 3 yr masses her room.
even my husband id tired of throwing away their toys, whenever he steps on them, we even stop buying toys form them. still they will not improve. books everywhere even when we brought them nice book selves., bigger bins/containers to put extra clothes that does not fit in closet or dresser. bigger bins for toys my house is even messy things everywhere. emoticon emoticon

1FEISTYMAMA's Photo 1FEISTYMAMA SparkPoints: (37,293)
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8/18/11 1:55 A

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My mom did that......bagged up all of our things and away they went. We saw her put them with the trash bins.......what we didn't see was her putting the bags in the attic when we weren't looking. She wasn't going to get rid of things she paid good money for. We got them back 6 months or a year later and it was like hitting the motherload.

I took it further. I explain to my kids, if you can't put things away then I guess you have too many things. I make THEM throw away their things. I hold the trash bag and ask them "trash or keep?". If it's trash, they toss it. If it's keep, they make room for it.

I also put their beds on risors. We have plastic bins under the beds. I figure, that's where everything ends up anyway, right? Under the bed? So, organize it. It can be under the bed as long as it's in a bin. Some bins are designated for specific items (trains, cars, kitchen dressup and legos all have their own). Everything else can be in any bin as long as it fits. Clean-up is a snap when you're tossing things into bins.

All clothes are in the laundry bag or put away.

I also choose a Saturday or Sunday morning for big clean-ups. You have ALL day to clean up your room if you like but you ain't coming out until it passes inspection.

Edited by: 1FEISTYMAMA at: 8/18/2011 (01:57)

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MOMTOCONNOR2003's Photo MOMTOCONNOR2003 Posts: 5,169
8/11/11 9:59 A

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My daughter is just like me when I was a kid. I never liked to clean my room. When I got my own place all of that changed. However what I have come to do is give her a deadline. I tell her she has two days to clean up her toys off the floor and or I will go through it with a garbage bag and throw anything in the floor in the trash. I do not care how expensive or new it is. If she does not respect her toys enough to take care of them i will no longer buy them or step on them. I have done this a couple times and now she knows I am serious. She of course will wait until the last minutes to do it. Also if I force both of my kids to work together to clean a room they fight like crazy. Constantly saying one is doing more than the other. I would assign tasks for each not doing the same thing and a deadline. That way you know which child suceeded and which one did not in accomplishing their tasks.

Edited by: MOMTOCONNOR2003 at: 8/11/2011 (10:00)
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HEALTHYOTTER's Photo HEALTHYOTTER Posts: 946
8/10/11 11:18 A

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Maybe this will offer some hope: my 13 year old boy usually keeps his room fairly well picked up. He never did when he was younger. With my 11 and 8 year old, the most surefire way to get success in cleaning their rooms is a) tie it into something they want: if the house isn't clean, you can't..... b) help supervise. My 3 are ADHD, so checking in with them frequently comes with the territory. Breaking down "clean your room" into steps helps all of us: put clothes in laundry or refold into drawers. Put books on bookshelf. Put shoes in holder, put toys in bins. For cleaning the family room, kitchen, etc, I'm focusing on all of us working as a team at the same time in 1 room, put on some music. I call out specific tasks for each kid: you pick up papers, you put away crayons.

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MSTIGGERFAN's Photo MSTIGGERFAN SparkPoints: (59,064)
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8/9/11 6:30 A

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Mine is exactly the opposite and it's my son who won't clean his room. For me I have told him that I will make them swap and he would have to clean his sisters room if he didn't get his done. I also give him a time limit that certain things be done by and write it on his dry erase board and make him check it off. I too have also started making my two help me with house chores as well to earn the extra things that they get. Good luck!!

Cherly
I can do all things through Christ who strenghtens me Philippians 4:13



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8/8/11 6:04 P

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My oldest is always saying that it too much work there is so much to be done. That's when I break it down, I tell her to do clothes first, then the bed, then pick up her toys and books. She even has it written down for her in the steps so she doesnt get over whelmed. I have seen her do her room in 10min when she wants things and on other days 5 hours.

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NCHEALTHY's Photo NCHEALTHY SparkPoints: (1,353)
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8/7/11 9:42 P

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This is going to sound weird, but do they know how to clean their room? Have you broken down the steps of what you expect, or do you just tell them to clean their room. What if you gave them smaller steps -- pick the clothes off the floor, make the bed, throw away the trash, make sure the laundry is in the hamper.... whatever. also, maybe 5 minutes a night of picking up before bedtime? It's a constant battle.

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8/7/11 4:44 P

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I have tried that. It would last a week then we would be back at square one again. I am just going crazy.

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MYBABYBEARS's Photo MYBABYBEARS Posts: 1,457
8/7/11 3:10 P

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Maybe try a reward system. I used to put a chart on the fridge and at the end of the day we would go through the checklist. I would have a category for "no clothes on the floor" "no toys/games on the floor", "brush teeth", "no fighting with sib", etc... If the chore was done without me telling them they got 2 stars instead of one.
They each made a goal.
25 stars - we go see a movie, etc.
They get into it at least for a while.

If you fail to plan, you plan to fail!


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8/7/11 1:54 P

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I am sure that I am not the only who has this issue. I have three kids ages 11 and 5, I have twins. How do I get them to clean their rooms without yelling. I swear by the time the weekend is over I have no voice. My two girls share a room (11 & 5) and my son has the smaller room (5). I don't have an issue with him cleaning, its my girls. Yelling and screaming at each other and getting nothing done. I have tried everything. I just want it done before the weekend is over. Every 2-3 months we go through the HUGE clean where I go in and throw out papers and trash that the oldest collects. HELP! What am I to do?

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