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KITTYKITTEMMING's Photo KITTYKITTEMMING SparkPoints: (78,646)
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8/2/13 10:28 P

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The ADHD in my oldest son is legit. I'm a teacher, so I see both sides of the situation. Undiagnosed/untreated and running around the room or failing classes because of organization/impulsivity issues. I also see those who are over-medicated to the point of being a zombie or medicated for no reason. My son takes one pill a day, down from five with a change in med managers shortly after diagnosis, which has really helped him. I'm also a very active parent working to limit his TV, video games, sugar, and keep his schedule quite structured with activities. He's doing very well, and his two younger siblings don't display any of the same issues.



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URBANAUDREYE's Photo URBANAUDREYE SparkPoints: (48,954)
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8/1/13 10:03 P

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Ugh... I hate the ADHD diagnosis, especially at such a young age. Careful with that dx. They tried treating me for an initial diagnosis of ADHD when I was younger which only ended up in worse problems because, surprise, I was misdiagnosed. They tend to throw that label on every kid these days, and very rarely are they actually correct. I don't know how much TV time you allow him, but sometimes if you restrict it more, ADHD symptoms will become less prominent. Get him involved in more reading and puzzle assembly, etc.

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KITTYKITTEMMING's Photo KITTYKITTEMMING SparkPoints: (78,646)
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8/1/13 4:41 P

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Interesting... He has always been my more overtly cuddly/worrisome Peanut as he has gotten older. They have decreased in frequency, intensity, and length. He will go into preschool in September. If issues continue I will ask that he be evaluated for sensory issues and OT. I'll also keep that in mind for my school-ager. He is ADHD and feels his emotions very strongly and over reacts frequently. Seeing possible sensory issues there, too.

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MOMIN09's Photo MOMIN09 Posts: 22,127
8/1/13 2:02 P

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I feel like with the aggressive behavior, that I could have written the post myself. My son is 4 and was having some very violent tantrums where he would hit, kick, spit. He's getting to the point where he's too strong for me to hold him down while he's having these "episodes". We were at his doctor for a different reason, and so we brought it up. He asked us a lot of questions about the behavior and then referred us to an occupational therapist for sensory issues. I really feel like this might have been the issue because since we started going, he really hasn't had as many episodes and when he does, they don't last as long.

Maybe something to talk to the doctor about if you need to have a referral to an occupational therapist.

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7/28/13 3:14 P

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I taught Kindergarten and I agree with what was said about sleep, reading books, and talking to them. Maybe set up a reward system that when he deals with the situation the right way he gets something. If it continues to get worse after all this I would look into his diet and counseling, but I wouldn't go right to that. You could even role play what he would do in certain situations, so you can get ahead of the problem.

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URBANAUDREYE's Photo URBANAUDREYE SparkPoints: (48,954)
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7/18/13 8:27 P

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Sounds a lot like me at 4... my mom put me in counseling. Though I don't necessarily recommend it. It sure didn't work for me. He has to want to be able to control it. Try sitting him down and talking about feelings. How did it make him feel when his brother hit him with the fishing toy? How does he think that his brother felt while he was beating up on him? How do mommy and daddy feel when he acts out that way? If you can help him to understand those feelings and how his behavior is hurting others, he might be more willing to be less aggressive. Again, it does take work. It took me a good 16 years to realize that I wanted to change, and it's been nearly a decade since that trying to control my emotions. And I'm not going to lie, I'm still aggressive, but at least I recognize it earlier now and can settle myself down.

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MYKIDSRSWEET's Photo MYKIDSRSWEET SparkPoints: (12,017)
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7/11/13 3:03 P

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My 11 year old was like that a lot at four, and is so different now. My doctor said it was normal too...and I worried so much so I feel for you. I had even made an appointment with a child psychologist but ended up canceling because by the six mon wait, he was much better. My suggestions that helped me are:

1. Make sure he is getting enough rest. When we started putting my son to bed earlie and added a nap sometimes he was much better.

2. Talk to him about other ways to take out his anger. We bought a punching bag and punching pad that my son could go to if he wanted to take out some energy. Or even punching a pillow. He felt more in control that way. We even learned that sending him to his room till he felt in control worked. Yelling or regular timeout escalated him, but giving him the option to come out whenever he was ready to follow the house rules really helped him.

3. Talk to him and share books about anger in general. Brian used to say that he could feel himself getting mad..lhe would get hot or sweaty or his heart would race. Talk about how to recognize the signs and tell him that those feelings are okay. Everyone feels them. He just needs to learn ways to act on those feelings that are allowed.




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KITTYKITTEMMING's Photo KITTYKITTEMMING SparkPoints: (78,646)
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7/11/13 2:55 P

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The rest of the stuff I described has been decreasing; it's just the aggression that seems to be increasing...

Thanks for the support.

Heather
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WILDFLOWER521's Photo WILDFLOWER521 Posts: 817
7/11/13 10:27 A

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I really wish I had an answer for you! My (just turned) 5 yr. old does this as well sometimes. Especially if all 3 kids are together playing (ages 12,5,3).

I end up removing him from the situation and sitting him in a room alone. This, of course, causes him to screech and scream louder and throw a tantrum. If we ignore him, he eventually stops. I make sure he doesn't have anything around him that he can accidentally hurt himself with or throw.

As for the riding on the freeway in the car, maybe if you distract him with coloring books or a portable dvd player?

Maybe you should look into a second opinion if he progressively gets worse? He could just be having a hard time expressing his feelings. My 3 yr. old has a hard time with that. She gets extremely frustrated and just starts in on a rant. I try to distract her before she gets into the tantrum too far. Sounds like you are doing a really great job with the situation. You deserve a pat on the back. Sometimes, I just have to walk away for a minute or two myself. Just to get my bearings back.

Good luck with everything.

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KITTYKITTEMMING's Photo KITTYKITTEMMING SparkPoints: (78,646)
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7/10/13 1:03 P

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Hi. I don't post here very often, but I'm finding that I need some help/ideas/suggestions for my four year old.

He really struggled with his behavior the last nine months. We had tantrums that would last for half an hour or more, aggression, strange fears (riding in the car on the freeway), and excessive fear (the dark). I did talk to our family doctor about these issues, and she said it was essentially the "terrible twos" and "troublesome threes" all rolled into one Peanut. Overall this have gotten better, with the exception of the aggression. I won't say he doesn't have reason, but his reaction is very over the top. As an example, he kicked his little brother this morning (age 2), and before I could separate the two, my two year old smacked him in the head with a plastic toy fishing rod. My four year old started screaming and attacked his little brother, hitting him repeatedly in the head and shoulders.

Of course I disciplined him (really both) and sent him for a time out in his room. Four minutes later he was completely calm, ready to apologize and rejoin the family (no further sign of agitation, adrenaline, etc.). Any ideas on what I can do to stop the aggression, though?



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