Hum. I think a lot of people, women especially, think like you do. I've had that mentality as well. "If I loose some weight and look better, I'll be happier." Personally, I don't think its the pounds or inches lost that does that though. I believe that as people treat their bodies and minds better (by exercising, eating healthier, getting rest, ect) , it's only natural for that body and mind to feel better/happier. A lot is to be said about the self confidence one gets when one makes any kind of goals and meets them or makes a commitment (like committing to track food and exercise long-term) and follows through with it. People discover inner strength when they are faced with temptations or obstacles almost daily.
There is possibly some underlying reason why you feel your weight is holding you back from lasting relationships. You might feel it's not fair for the person you're with to be "stuck" with someone whose not "hot" or healthy, I call it the "I'm not worthy" complex (I have it myself, but mine's not weight-dependent) You might even be sabotaging relationships without realizing it.
With these types of issues, I always say seek help. If you can't figure out things on your own, find a councilor or therapist you feel comfortable talking things through with.
If exercise makes you happy, do it as often as you can. Good luck, Spark Sister!
current weight: 210.0
Fitness Minutes: (7,800) Posts: 32 4/20/13 9:25 A
I am the queen of excuses and have a long to do list that I'm not motivated to do. When I'm not in the loop/on the band wagon/in an exercise routine, I add exercise to my to do list. That is always the first to get skipped.
When I was cleaning, I found a journal from when I was in college. The first entry was from April 2000 - "I'm fat, I'm making bad choices, I'm worthless, etc." The second entry was from Feb 2001 - "I've started exercising, watching what I eat and I've lose 30 lbs. I am seeing Mike, although, I don't know if that will work out but I have a date with Dave on Saturday. I feel good but I have a long way to go." I know that thin is not measured by love life but I also truly believe for me, that is the reason I am alone. I date people but it never lasts with the people I want it to last with.
Here's where the confusion comes in - I want to lose weight for myself, I do believe it will make me happy. I need to lose weight for my health. What I've got going on here is a hot mess. I like to exercise, I love the release of endorphins and the all around feeling of fantastic it gives me.
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