I know what you are feeling. I have been with my partner for 4 yrs. For the first 6 months we had a wonderful sex life. But the past 3 1/2 yrs it is nowhere to be found. We love one another and live together he just cant bring himself to inniate sex. If I touch him he rolls over or has some excuse. I have not gained any weight but he says he loves ME but hates my body. He says he tried and it worked for 6 months but he cant do it any more. So if I were as young as you I would lose the weight for me and put him on the curb. I dont make a lick of sense do I? Please dont be like me and think its good enough for who its for or worse half a loaf is better than none.
Edited by: SONJ57 at: 4/1/2010 (17:00)
Fitness Minutes: (33,935) Posts: 10,077 1/16/10 11:45 A
In my opinion, you should NEVER strive to lose weight to "make" someone love you again. In my opinion, he's being very shallow. What's inside is more important than what's outside... I give him credit for being honest with you, but at the same time, you need to let this one go. If he can't love you when you're fat, and it makes you feel bad about yourself... well, it's just not good.
The most important thing is to be sure you are losing the weight for YOU, and no one else. You CAN do this... and it has absolutely nothing to do with him. ;)
"Do, or do not. There is no try." - Yoda
Total Pounds Lost with SparkPeople: 65!
On Official Spark Hiatus, with a newborn baby girl (born 7/23/11). Will be back when I am done breastfeeding :D
Fitness Minutes: (175,033) Posts: 21,521 1/16/10 10:56 A
Staying engaged with this website can be motivational, encouraging and educational. This lifestyle change will empower you. I do empathize with your hurt feelings but you can also take pleasure in knowing your man is honest and clear. Being overweight does create obstacles for a relationship. I speak from experience. It is time to take the steps to lose the extra weight and be healthy and fit. You will find rewards with every pound lost as you become disciplined and more mindful. Keep posting and let me know how you are doing. I looked at your SparkPage and you are already beautiful. Empower yourself by becoming fit too!
I've never posted anything on here before, but I have been in a situation for several months now that is intefering with my weight and I need some motivational advice.
I'm 25 and I didn't start dating till last year. I met a man I fell for and he for me. When I had met him I had lost 80 pounds, but gained 30 during the course of our relationship. We had been together seven months when out of nowhere he says he can't love me because I'm fat. He thinks I'm beautiful inside and out but I'm fat. So the relationsip ended there because I was so hurt that he couldn't stand by me. We still see each other every day and are best friends and we still have feelings for one another. I have to lose 100 pounds for him to be happy and for him to agree to dat me and for me to be healthy. He works out with me alot but I'm still angry and hurt by what he said, because I'm worth having heavy or not. I need some help, advice, motivation to get passed this. I'm motivated to lose my weight on my own,but I'm still hurting and depressed. Please help.
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