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BOCCATAGHNA1955's Photo BOCCATAGHNA1955 SparkPoints: (9,562)
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9/12/14 2:39 P

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Inga, I am so sorry for you. I have been in your situation, and had to deal with most awful things myself while my ex-husband watched and did nothing. My life was abusive -verbally, physically (when I was a child) and mentally.

Please remember that you are a wonderful person and are worth all the love there is in the world. I will keep you in my prayers.

Today is the beginning of the rest of my life.

Marie


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LACEYKYLE's Photo LACEYKYLE SparkPoints: (18,670)
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9/11/14 10:08 P

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I am praying!!

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
9/10/14 11:45 A

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Hi Pink Soldier, I am so sorry for your situation. I am sure you stay in it for your own reasons but it seems that you have enough of a battle with your health issues. But, who said life would be fair? My experience has taught me that people don't change and if it is verbal abuse which is bad enough as it can tear you down emotionally and physically, it could escalate to something more. I pray that God gives you guidance and direction on what is the best solution to your difficulty with your husband. Perhaps counselling would help but since he works so many hours I'm sure that would be his excuse. Cast all your troubles onto Jesus, He will help you!

God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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PINK-SOLDIER's Photo PINK-SOLDIER SparkPoints: (120,115)
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9/9/14 12:52 P

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emoticon I keep up with daily Bible study, I have looked into things that help, read books, talk to counselors. I am like Abigail in the Bible, I will persevere.

Inga
Co-Leader of Breast Cancer Survivor's & Those Who Care. Days Go By...So Live Your Life.

Motivational Quote:
"You have within you a supply of energy limited only by your ability to discover and develop it. In body, mind and spirit, you are endowed with capabilities far greater than you know, keep reaching for your potential. "




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IGNITEME101's Photo IGNITEME101 Posts: 5,770
9/9/14 12:13 P

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RESERVED I'm glad you're coming to some new revelations! It makes good sense.

PTL!

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IGNITEME101's Photo IGNITEME101 Posts: 5,770
9/9/14 12:12 P

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Oh, Pink Soldier! What a sad situation.
I will keep you on my prayer list.
Do you have a support group that is nearby? A church, or family that you can be honest with?

I went through emotional abuse with my x-husband, and his drinking, towards the end of our marriage.



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9/9/14 11:11 A

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emoticon and emoticon

I am in an emotionally destructive marriage, it has been going on during my entire cancer journey, 3 bout's with cancer/13 surgeries, chemo 2x and radiation started 10 years ago this past June. My husband is verbally abusive and works too much, he makes good money but does not keep our home up. We have mold, sewer odors, about 30 things to repair, I am alone from him at least 75 hours a week. I am stuck. emoticon so much more...very bad situation.

Inga
Co-Leader of Breast Cancer Survivor's & Those Who Care. Days Go By...So Live Your Life.

Motivational Quote:
"You have within you a supply of energy limited only by your ability to discover and develop it. In body, mind and spirit, you are endowed with capabilities far greater than you know, keep reaching for your potential. "




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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
9/9/14 10:49 A

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Thank all of you for your support. I am feeling better now. I understand that it is hard to admit to emotional abuse when you are in the middle of it. I have decided to stop kicking myself for allowing it to go on. I have forgiven my abuser realizing that is his reaction to life. He once told me his childhood was more chaotic than being in Viet Nam. I fully realize that an abusive person is just that....I have no hopes of changing him and have enough trouble making good choices for myself. I just have to look at this whole experience as a lesson in life to be aware....to look before I leap and to not give my heart before I truly know a person. I am grateful that I am no longer in the situation and look to the fact that I went down that alley as a way to deal with suppressed emotional rage in myself.

God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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IGNITEME101's Photo IGNITEME101 Posts: 5,770
9/9/14 10:19 A

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RESERVED I agree with Ronda, you can do it!!

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HANNAHSGRAMMIE's Photo HANNAHSGRAMMIE SparkPoints: (66,664)
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9/8/14 8:20 A

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RESERVED, it took a lot of courage to step away from a bad situation. I'm praying that you'll stay courageous and be strong. You can do it!!

Blessings,

¸¸.•´¸.•*¨) ♥¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ .♥ (¸.•´ .♥ (¸.•*´¨`* ♥☆¸.•*´¨`*♥☆¸.•*´¨
`*♥☆ Ronda, the lady with MS (The Master's Strength)
¸.•´¸.•*¨) ♥¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ .♥ (¸.•´ .♥ (¸.•*´¨`* ♥☆¸.•*´¨`*♥☆¸.•*´¨
`*♥☆

Hopeful Hearts Breaking Free From Hurts, Leader

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13


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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
9/6/14 12:09 A

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My ex-husband from a marriage (an 8 year abusive relationship) that ended 32 years ago used to say, "do you want the truth or do you want to be happy?". Facing the truth does make me free but I must admit I am having a hard time hanging on to my joy. I have heard the "price of freedom is lonliness". But, I know that there are worse things than lonliness and I know that abuse is one of those things. I think I am fortunate to break away from this man. I have had weak moments when I wanted to call "him" but I am happy to report that I have not done that. Mixed in with the feelings of abandonment are feelings of shame for having put up with the emotional abuse for so long and there were signs of physical abuse. I should be saying WHEW!

God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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IGNITEME101's Photo IGNITEME101 Posts: 5,770
9/4/14 11:22 P

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Bamajama is right on!! emoticon for the truth! Its what makes us FREE!!

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LACEYKYLE's Photo LACEYKYLE SparkPoints: (18,670)
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9/4/14 9:15 P

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emoticon with BAMAJAM2 wholeheartedly!!!!

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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9/4/14 3:12 P
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Yes-- You are strong enough to realize that you deserve to be valued and you deserve RESPECT!
When you miss the hugs and kisses --- think of the abuse that was attached to these gestures. You have dignity, and you have value, and you deserve to be treated respectfully. Please know that prayers are good for everyone, especially the one who mistreated you. However, you have taken enough abuse; enough!
You have team members who offer support and offer encouragement-- Best wishes!

God grant me the strength to reach my goal.


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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
9/4/14 12:36 P

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I have started gonging all my thoughts about "him". I do miss the hugs and kisses ... but now they are gone. I pray for him when I think about him. I have a lot of other people to pray for including me. God has assured me that He will make me stronger. I am strong enough to live without the emotionally abusive man that I love.


God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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9/3/14 12:01 P
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Hi Irene--

Well I am older than you, and I have those "child-like" eating habits too! Faced with a gooey pastry, it takes powerful strength to resist. --- However, considering the consequences, considering the "harm" from the evil calories, maturity and logic should WIN OUT!! LOL
--- Sending you big hugs!
Mary

God grant me the strength to reach my goal.


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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
9/3/14 11:55 A

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I weighed in today at 309.6. I've got to end the emotional child-like eating! Five years ago, I weighed 293 so in five years I have gained 16 pounds...at that rate (about 3 pounds per year) in 10 years I would weigh 350 pounds. Now, that is frightening!!!!

God has put a bandaid on my broken heart and I am given myself some time to heal. I am aware that the heart is a muscle and needs to be exercised once in a while and hey! I am 66 years old and still can fall foolishly in love, break up and heal. Life is good! Now to end the emotional eating!!!

Thanks for all of your support.
Irene

God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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LACEYKYLE's Photo LACEYKYLE SparkPoints: (18,670)
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9/2/14 4:49 P

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RESERVED1948, God is hugging on you girl and He's going to get you through this. You are so blessed to have someone who'll clean out and under your fridge!!! Just knowing it's clean makes you feel like the whole house is clean.

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
9/1/14 12:13 P

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Thank you for your prayers. They are working! I'm enjoying my last free day off before returning to work. I am feeling relieved for being out of an abusive relationship. God is good!


God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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INEEINAZ's Photo INEEINAZ SparkPoints: (12,620)
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9/1/14 2:17 A

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RESERVED1948.....
I'm praying for you. Keep your head up.
emoticon

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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
8/31/14 12:37 A

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I am still eating too much. I am trying to step up my exercise. I realize I have a lot going for me including relative good health for which I am thankful for. Tuesday I will be returning to my job. I'll be well rested, better adjusted and ready and willing to do my work. Today my cleaning girl came and cleaned my refrigerator and moved it and cleaned behind and under. This needed to be done and I am fortunate to have a friend come by who needs the extra money. Life is good. I am disappointed in love but thanks to God and my family and friends, I am on the mend. I think I just have to salvage my wounded ego at this rate. In the scheme of things wounded pride is not the worse thing that can happen and their are much worse things than lonliness. I can co lonely, that I am familiar with.

God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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IGNITEME101's Photo IGNITEME101 Posts: 5,770
8/28/14 11:50 P

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emoticon with you and Dari!! emoticon with JESUS!!!

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LACEYKYLE's Photo LACEYKYLE SparkPoints: (18,670)
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8/28/14 11:30 P

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RESERVED1948, I'm glad you joined this team also. You have an excellent attitude even though you're hurting. Trust me right now, God is the BEST partner you can have. You don't get distracted, just growing closer to Him. I wouldn't have it any other way right now. I know God has wonderful plans for you Jeremiah 29:11. I'll be praying for you!! And keep us updated, we care!!

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
8/28/14 2:35 P

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thanks for your encouragement. I am happy that I joined this team. I took this week off from work because I was too distracted to work but now I am feeling like the dishes that were falling out of my mental closet have stopped jangling about. I know I can be alone because I have been alone before. One thing that helps is I know I am alone with God. Better to be alone than in company of an abusive partner. Been there done that!

God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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IGNITEME101's Photo IGNITEME101 Posts: 5,770
8/27/14 7:04 P

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Reserved1948, I agree with bamajam2 and dari! You are getting better, even though you've slipped into eating too much for a while.
OA is a great organization, for SURE!

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8/27/14 4:41 P
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Reserved1948
Hope that I can cheer your day--- Chin up, Sweetie, --- that man that you thought you loved did not deserve your love. If he showed disrespect for you, and if he treated you rudely, he certainly did not have lovable qualities. A broken relationship can sting for a while, but if logic prevails, you are much better off without him! You mentioned Overeaters Anonymous and going back to their meetings.... I wish that that group was convenient for me. Not only can you reach weight loss success, but the social atmosphere can provide a happy outlet for you. Know that Spark friends are wishing you all the best, and sincerely want you to feel hopeful for your future! Each new day offers a fresh beginning! Warm HUGS!
Mary

God grant me the strength to reach my goal.


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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
8/27/14 1:49 P

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I took advantage of the fact that my heart was broken open and turned to Jesus and the word of God. In working with the children in Vacation Bible School, my inner child is being healed. I noticed when I colored with the three year olds that my picture of Queen Esther had her all dressed in blue. Her face looked happy but I had chosen blue and caught that is how I feel even though I am smiling on the outside. My heartache is healing, my mind was disturbed and is calming down. Now all I have to do is salvage my silly putty ego which has yet again been put through a meat grinder. One day at a time. I have been stuffing with food but I think I am getting under control again. One day at a time. I think I will go back to my overeaters annonymous group which meets on Sunday. But, I will be too embarrassed to tell them the man I loved thought I was too fat to be desireable.

God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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LACEYKYLE's Photo LACEYKYLE SparkPoints: (18,670)
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8/26/14 7:55 P

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emoticon with Della. She is so right. I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years a little over a year ago and haven't regretted it. He was a nice man who claimed to be someone he was not. We were supposed to get married this year. He was the only long term relationship I've had since my husband of 20 years passed away. I found out my ex-boyfriend got married 5 months after we broke up. Weird, but confirmed he wasn't who he said he was. I'm sure you're doing the right thing and I know you know that. Keep running to God, His arms are wide open for you.

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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IGNITEME101's Photo IGNITEME101 Posts: 5,770
8/26/14 6:05 A

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Break ups are difficult, to say the least!! It takes a lot to want to be in a relationship at our age. I admire your 'desire'.
I don't think you're a sick puppy, at all. You ended it, because you thought it was best for you. We have to take care of ourselves first, before we can rake care of anyone else and it seems to me, you know that. (That's healthy)

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RESERVED1948's Photo RESERVED1948 Posts: 596
8/26/14 2:43 A

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I broke up with a man I love because I realized I could not trust him and he was treating me with disrespect. He was scheduled for surgery for an aneurysm and I felt I was over a barrel when he stood me up yet again but when I talked to him he was so arrogant that I ended the relationship over the phone. That was two weeks ago and I haven't heard from him since. I know it would be folly for me to call and find out how he is. I find myself out of control with the eating. I was so distracted at work I decided to take this week as vacation and work with my church's program on Vacation Bible School. It was a blessing to allow my inner child to put cotton balls on the sheep that I had just colored with the shepherd and his staff and sitting with the little three year olds. I'll be doing this every night for the rest of the week, then hopefully the mind virus that kept me in an abusive relationship for a year will be healed and I can focus on my work. I'm not hungry -- it is 3:00 am in the morning and all I can think about is something else to eat. I realize this is separation anxiety. I still love this man and am harboring delusions of his getting me back. I am a sixty six year old woman with a history of two abusive marriages and I am pining away hoping for marriage with a man who has shown me to be abusive. What a sick puppy!!!

God loves me just the weigh I am and too much to leave me this weight!


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LACEYKYLE's Photo LACEYKYLE SparkPoints: (18,670)
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8/25/14 8:43 P

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You don't sound ungrateful at all. Lets face it we live in a technology world, well most of us do
we depend on our computer, phone, etc. When we don't have them accessible it's an adjustment. I'll be praying yours is able to be fixed soon!!

emoticon

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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DUSTYPRAIRIE's Photo DUSTYPRAIRIE Posts: 9,079
8/25/14 4:26 P

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It's been hard to communicate because my computer crashed. Sometimes I can use hubby's which is helpful. I don't mean to seem ungrateful. It just gets frustrating.

CAL6563's Photo CAL6563 Posts: 207
7/17/14 11:36 A

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Praying for you and your family this morning. Sometimes I find that having a good cry makes me feel better...get it out instead of keeping it inside. I'm then able to say... "Okay, God, I know you're with me and You are in control."
Love and blessings,
Candy





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BOCCATAGHNA1955's Photo BOCCATAGHNA1955 SparkPoints: (9,562)
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7/17/14 8:14 A

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I am thinking of you Della. Life is so hard at times, and crying is a good relief. Be strong as your mother will need your strength.

Today is the beginning of the rest of my life.

Marie


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IGNITEME101's Photo IGNITEME101 Posts: 5,770
7/16/14 7:41 P

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I'm crying with you. Everyone deals with illness, death, differently.
emoticon emoticon
You're not alone! Della

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PHATCRYSSY's Photo PHATCRYSSY Posts: 250
7/16/14 4:29 P

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Today I am having a sad day I just need a sit and talk, with some one that is not family. We have my father in~law back at the emergency room by ambulance. They are going to admit him. I had to convince him that he needed to come to the e.r. and with out fight he came. Some of his children act like nothing is wrong and he is just bounce back from this. And some understand this could be his last day. I am so sad because I didn't have this with my dad. I didn't get to make the calls to the ambulance, I didn't get to sit up at the hospital. It was just a call one late night from the local e.r. that he was gone and I had to identify even though his new wife was there. I who am only a child of his by his son is the one not handling this well. Mom j broke down today also. But I have to stay strong and I can't know all I want to do is sit and cry.

Forgive the novel thank you for listening and prayers

“NEVER!! discourage anyone...who continually makes progress, no matter how slow.”
~~Plato~~


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LACEYKYLE's Photo LACEYKYLE SparkPoints: (18,670)
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7/15/14 1:50 P

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Marie and SHORTSTORY I so agree about the clothing in church. I've always gone to a church where you dress up and for the last 8 years I belong to a church where the dress is casual. It's great and I don't feel judged. We're able to see the heart and look past the clothing. I live in the desert where it gets in the 100's in the summer so being comfortable is very important. I also agree that the weather affects me too. I know what you mean about gloomy. Even as a child living in northern CA I was affected by all the fog. Nice to hear from you ladies.

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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BOCCATAGHNA1955's Photo BOCCATAGHNA1955 SparkPoints: (9,562)
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7/14/14 3:23 P

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Sat down this morning with my home help and agreed a new schedule and it is hopefully going to work.

Today is the beginning of the rest of my life.

Marie


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SHORTSTORY2's Photo SHORTSTORY2 SparkPoints: (8,956)
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7/14/14 9:21 A

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The weather tends to have quite an affect on me. Here in Oregon it has been gloomy and very foggy most of the time we have been here. A few times the sun has come out in the afternoon, but every morning we wake up to gloom. Right now it is all fogged in with so much moisture in the air that it looks like it is raining! Makes me want to stay in bed ; ( I've been snacking more too. Time for some sunshine!!! We leave here on the 20th. Thank you God!!!

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7/14/14 5:11 A

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I am not one to create an arguement so I stay quiet and put up with a lot of things. This morning I had to sort out a problem and I prayed for God to help me and he did. Things are now sorted and life should be a bit easier.

Today is the beginning of the rest of my life.

Marie


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7/13/14 9:12 P

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It is sad when people can only see the outside and not the heart. We go to church to worship God. What we wear shouldn't be so important. I think as long as we look respectful that's fine. I don't think we should go in our worse cloths, but being comfortable sure does help.


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7/13/14 11:54 A

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I am a practicing Catholic and attend Mass as much as I can. Here in Malta we dress modestly but the heat that we have in the summer is pretty unbearable and there is no air conditioning just fans. The ladies wear short sleeved tops or dresses or full or mid-calf pants while the men where t shirts or short sleeved shirts and either long pants or shorts. In England though it is very different, we can wear what we like within reason and no one bats an eye. I think its a shame that one is judged by what one wears than what is in one´s heart. What God thinks of us is what is important and if we believe and trust in him, nothing else matters.

Today is the beginning of the rest of my life.

Marie


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7/11/14 4:40 P

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Praise God Diane! I'm so happy for you.

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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7/10/14 10:46 P

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emoticon Diane, that is really good. Forgiveness heals all concerned if they are willing.

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7/10/14 7:48 P

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Just want to say..... I have been reading and adjusting more to the Lord as my Shepherd. Just yesterday & today, I have been saying, what an abundant, loving, comforting Mother/Father Lord I have in my life. And when I called my mother today, it was like all that resentment had fallen away.

I also seem not to be "coveting" things, for example, all that nasty junk food in the stores. This makes me so happy!

emoticon - Diane -

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest." (MSG, Matt.11:28)


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6/30/14 1:44 A

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INEEINAZ I agree! I'm believing for my family and God's word is encouraging me.


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6/29/14 5:29 P

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Everyone is at different levels when it comes to their journey with the Lord. No two are the same walking through the doors of a church. I love how the Lord is a true gentleman and lets us "realize" things at His pace.
I think that when my daughters have that revelation (because I am believing and trusting that they will), it will be ever so much more deeper and etched in their spirit because it will ultimately be their decision and not mine.

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6/25/14 1:03 P

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Bene, I agree with Dari. Some have been without modesty their entire life and don't know any different. I find it offensive everywhere except at a swimming pool. Still, it's what the media promotes and some are more in tune with that than GOD.

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6/25/14 12:57 P

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Bene, I know what you mean. I now go to a "casual" church and I love it. I don't have to think about what I'm going to wear but some people take it too far. There's a mom and her two daughter's who do take it too far. Too much leg and too much cleavage. As an older member of the church I want to say something but I've been praying about it and I feel the Lord is telling me to step back and wait for her to see it for herself. The Lord doesn't want me to jeopardize her not coming back. I make sure I greet her and her daughter's when I see them so they feel welcomed and loved. I pray for them that the Lord will speak clarity when it comes to their clothing. They're very sweet ladies. We get a lot of visitors too and I wouldn't want them to think they weren't welcomed back. The Lord took me when I was a mess.

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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6/24/14 8:11 P

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AMEN!

emoticon emoticon

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6/24/14 4:33 P

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.... thankfully, He'll NEVER give up on any of His own. emoticon emoticon
while I was this sick I had moments that His hand on my life was so clear. He promised and He keeps His promises.

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6/23/14 4:43 P

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Thank you IGNITEME.

It's imperative that I do not give up on the Lord....He's NEVER given up on me.
I appreciate your prayers.

Have a blessed day!
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6/23/14 3:33 P

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Sometimes, it's right to be uncomfortable. It helps us grow more in Him. I've found that the times things were the roughest at church, I was made stronger in Him. Praying for you INEEINAZ.

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6/23/14 3:06 A

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Thank you for your encouragement.
I need to keep my eyes on the Lord and be strong while I am uncomfortable at church.

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6/22/14 7:58 P

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INEEINAZ, I understand. I've felt this way many times! The enemy of our soul loves to get us discouraged.
It's some of the same thing I'm working through now. Different reason, but relly the same problem.

Keeping my eyes on what's right, His word and searching for Him is the only way. He promises that if we seek for Him with our whole hearts we will find Him! He's closer than you may think. Don't give up! It's the only thing that counts in this life-peace with Him.....
Sometimes when I want to give up, I hear a little voice that says, 'I'm right here with you'.

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6/22/14 7:37 P

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I am a devout Catholic and I don't like to see immodest clothef, but our standards are not the same. we wear jeans, shorts, and the like. In old times, though, the priest might not give Holy Communion to someone who was showing too much! When I say "immodest," I am not talking about jeans (even short ones). I am talking about a dress that shows too much cleavage, shorts so short you can see everything, and hip huggers with short tops where you can see tooo much belly. And on the male side, there's the fashion of wearing big pants with no belt so that the wearer is showing more of his behind than I ever wanted to see. I play a lot of weddings and the trend in wedding gowns is rather shocking, to say the least! On the positive side, the groom can certainly see what he is getting! emoticon

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6/22/14 6:51 P

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I am struggling with my church.

Some of the members have made it very difficult for my daughters. The church that I go to is very modest. They believe that women should always wear skirts, wear shirts that have sleeves that cover their elbows and high necklines. I believe that this is a personal conviction between you and the Lord. Well, my daughters are not abiding by that. I don't force them because this has to be a personal walk with them. They have to have a relationship with the Lord on their own. Now I don't allow them to wear just whatever. They do not argue with me when I tell them no short skirts or short shorts. ( I work at a high school and I have seen a lot!)

Well, we were at a store and some of the members of the church saw my daughter in a pair of jeans that went past her knees and a t-shirt. The next day in Sunday school the topic was about modest dress. This didn't bother me because I figured that it was going to preached...until I heard the way the youth pastor delivered it. Things were said like "if I was that person's parent, I wouldn't allow such a thing" and some other things were said.....Well we are not the same and I wasn't raised in church. My household is not the same as others. Everyone raises their families different....our arrival to the Lord is different for everyone. No two are exactly the same.

This made my daughters upset and cry. My husband is not in church...so I have a battle because my house is divided. Some of the kids at church stopped talking to my kids for awhile and stopped inviting them to "youth activities".

There is much more, but it's too much to write. This has turned my house upside down and made my struggle a bit harder. There is negativity when the topic of church is brought up. I think my kids are almost in the mode of "hating church". This is not good at all. I have a brother who is agnostic and an uncle who is completely atheist. It's not good at all. They are missing something so great deep down inside.

I have tried to talk to the pastor and he said don't let the devil get you offended by others.

I need prayer because it is very difficult to see these people. My initial instinct is to get in their face and confront them, but I am trying to relax and not be the hot-headed, aggressive person when I feel my family is attacked.

Not all the church people are like this....there are some amazing ladies there as well who are wonderful sisters in Christ. Then there are some that have completely stopped talking to me and I didn't even have issues with them.
Now I am seeing things I have never noticed before. The other day the pastor was talking at the pulpit saying that another member came to him and showed him a picture of another member at a baseball game (which is kind of a no-no cause it can steer you away from God). Now personally I don't think baseball can take you away from the Lord, but then again I would never be obsessed with baseball...it bores me. But I thought..who has time to go in a tattle-tell against another member of the church???!!! If they were doing something illegal or something that was dangerous, then maybe they had a reason to bring it up to pastor. emoticon

Just recently one of my daughters told me that the spouse of one of my good friends at church told her that he is going to pray that she has a miserable high school experience in order for her to come running to church. Really!?! Why would you pray for such horrible things....that would not be my choice on how to pray for others. You don't pray against people...you pray for them. It's up to the Lord if He chooses to place obstacles in front of them....not you. emoticon

I feel so stuck. I just want a relationship with the Lord because in the end....church is just a building with people in it.....what counts is my relationship with the Lord. I have been struggling with this for over 3 months now. Church used to be a place of comfort where I can refresh my soul. Now it's just a place of stress and resentment.

I didn't mean for this to be so long and dragged out...I guess I am still more upset than I'd like to believe.

I need prayer....please!

Thank you.

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6/21/14 7:14 P

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emoticon Dari! I have slept since 10 or so last night mostly until now. Lots of hours, but I am healing. How could I sleep that long? I woke up around 8 took the meds with yogurt and slept with a few conversations with my gd who is swimming now w my lovely Dd!!
My DRs words were sleep as much and as long as you can. I'm doing just as she says, too.

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6/21/14 2:32 P

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Della, you have let NO ONE down! You can't control when you get sick or how bad. You are doing the best you can and it's so important to rest and heal so you don't relapse. We love you and want you to take care of yourself first.

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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6/20/14 10:03 P

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Anyone need to vent about what's keeping them down today?

I've sure had a weird day, but got through it!

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6/13/14 7:00 P

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Debbie, I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL.
I felt bad like I let every one down I thought being unable to go outside would make it easier to be online but that didn't happen, either. Thank you for being understanding.
Helplessness is a good think if/when it turns our focus back on GOD. I have been fighting to stay right there.....
steroids are a bummer. live - learn: then do it right! lol hugs my friend!!

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6/13/14 6:53 P

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Della, I think that before all this was placed on my plate it was fine, I knew I needed help but I figured it would come soon, this week was so busy and having remodeling done on the one day off! Tomorrow I am going to have the day to myself to clean answer emails etc. I will try to get to a bunch tomorrow later and we are suppose to go to Breakfast on the Farm but it is suppose to storm so I may get to a lot on Sunday if that happens! I will pray for your recovery, we never know if what we are eating is really good, I try hard but every once in a while make bad choices, boy do I pay for it! My tummy does not like a lot of sugar or any fried food! I think a McDonalds hamburger would make me vomit! LOL. Our bodies are so particular! God Bless you sister! Deb

Debbie Pheifer
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6/13/14 3:13 P

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Bene, I understand about bosses. Though I'm retired, we all have a boss of some sort. Government, loan holders, electric bills, etc., they all have a power over us. It's why it's so nice to know GOD is in control and that He is our supreme boss..

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6/13/14 3:10 P

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DEBBIEPHEIFER57 , no worries at all. I've been sick but I remember feeling in the beginning as a sparker, at times, that I could not do enough to spread the word. So I understand your frustration. Now that I've been sick it's hard to let go and rest. I'm doing more now. Adjusting to the food changes is hard for me. It's like learning to et all over again. I use to work in the weight loss field so for the 1st time, I don't know what to do about my food! It's kind of funny when you think about it. All of my knowledge about weight loss is almost useless, for the time being.


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6/13/14 1:58 P

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My boss. He can be really frustrating! emoticon

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6/12/14 9:09 P

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I am sorry my letter was so blunt and angry. I was just frustrated. I knew I was going back to work, I had a busy month coming up and when we asked people to help there was no response. There is no way people who have just lost loved ones or have been ill should feel guilty for not helping with introductions. They will wait, Dari is helping, we will get more help. I am sorry for making you feel bad... emoticon Deb

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6/11/14 2:39 P

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D7TOHIM,
It's hard s our loved ones get older. She may have some memory problems. she sounds happy though. It's great that you still have her in your life.
So glad you have friends to share with!! Dell

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6/11/14 2:34 P

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Deb, I appreciate all you re doing for our team. Hopefully, I'm back on the mend. I have always read their blogs, Nnd left comments plus a goodie until I was so sick I couldn't do it anymore. I have welcomed a couple today and hope to be able to do more.
emoticon

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6/8/14 10:41 P

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I really want some of the leaders to step up and help with new SP introductions. I read about doing the auto welcome, that is so un personal. I like to address the reason they are introducing themselves, like if they have a question regarding where to start, you have a auto message that's great that you welcomed them but they still don't have their question answered! Sometimes the auto message is just a welcome emotion, is this the way we want to great new people? To me it is cold and if they have a question you just blew them off. So I am trying to do as many as I can but it is taking hours, a day. The other night I was up till 11:30pm and I had to be up by 6am. I can't keep this up. It is about being kind compassionate and understanding people who are coming to a group for the same reason we did. I was welcomed and felt it! Now we want to AUTO welcome, our team needs at least 3 people. What could be more important then greeting new members, to SP or HH? Sorry I don't want to come off crude, but I am getting frustrated. I also get about 50 messages in my in box because of others responding to the new members, I don't want to un click because how would I know if a new member has a question, so today I went through over 80 messages. Please someone step up! I would be so grateful! Blessings, Deb

Debbie Pheifer
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6/7/14 8:36 P

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I wish my mother wanted to listen to me. I called her again today with a couple of things I could share; well, she did ask about my trip to Florida, but I had more girl stuff on my mind. My counselor has told me that it will probably always be that way (talking about herself - then she wants to quick hang up). I guess I need to remember that she is 87 yrs old, & in assisted living & what things happen in a ward like that ( I mean as far as extracurricular stuff & world events - she rarely watches TV).

I wish it were more of an intimate level, but I think that is what we have friends for. And I have a couple dear, dear friends. I am thankful for that. - Diane -

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest." (MSG, Matt.11:28)


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4/28/14 8:54 P

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Jenny, I know what you mean. Or when they tell you they know how you feel when they've never experienced what you're going through. I know they're trying to be sympathetic and nice but they make the problem worse. It's hard to gently tell them not to do that. I try to learn from it and remember to not do it to someone else. Are you doing any better?

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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4/17/14 10:01 P

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What bothers me is when people try and tell me what they know it hurts to think that they have never been in my shoes. I mean I bought orthotics and they only made the pain that much worse. Last night two people I will leave unnamed since they know who they are said something to set me off. Because of that my page will now be private. When you are in pain protocol don't matter to you. You want the pain gone! One remedy does not fit all. So said Christy Brown; my former primary. She don't think it will work for me. I am on my last legs with cortisone shots. Christy Brown believes therapy and orthotics won't help me. One of them was a friend who spoke of protocol. I think that friend doesn't know how protocol angers me.

Jenny Peshtigo WI
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4/16/14 9:44 A

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My finance's are always messed up ( I have little say or control over even the money I make......... the person in charge spent 700.00 on a hobby and pushed the mortgage off anly to tell me if we fall through with any financial obligations he is leaving because he is not going to be with a loser ) but it is WORDS! more than anything. I try to pill them of and reject them or work harder if they have truth I recognize I am not perfect.
It is a never ending battle ...... the critical and negative people who speak them do not see what they do to the inside of you. If you try to express how bad they have hurt you they justify it as you deserve it. ( I was told I deserve to have a failing business this week because I am lazy and sugar issues )
Forgiveness is good but it wont cover the gun shy feeling you have with trusting others with the most fragile parts of you on the inside. Trying not to get tearful or pull away or be too cool and steady which usually a critical/ negative person will see as you being disrespectful .
Words are very very powerful and we all should be a lot more carful about what and how we say things.
Hugs and Prayers



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3/13/14 9:19 P

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Personally when my finances are messed up, it gets me down cause I know I did it to myself!

emoticon

I can also get down if I am craving a particular food and am not able to get it. It puts me in a bad mood for a bit I'm ashamed to say.

He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Isaiah 40:29 NKJV

Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Phillipians 2:4 NKJV


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GLITTER60's Photo GLITTER60 SparkPoints: (8,543)
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3/11/14 6:28 P

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thank you everyone.

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3/11/14 1:21 P

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emoticon So sort for your loss Glitter,hardest thing I ever went through was the loss of my Father,will be praying for your peace and comfort emoticon emoticon

''By God's design,there lies in wait for you,Important work for you to do.Just as the planets find their paths through space,You too must grow to fill your proper place''Unknown


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