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JEROMESGURL's Photo JEROMESGURL SparkPoints: (4,108)
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7/10/13 7:48 P

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Hey everyone!!!! Wow- I want to thank all of you for sharing- I know it''s hard to talk about- but sometimes talking about it to others that truly care, like those on our team, helps us to realize, be more contentious, and being accountable is such a wonderful motivational tool!!! You are all so brave to bare everything here- know that you are protected in so much love and through God all things are possible!!!! You can do it- and we are all here to help- you have made the first step -acknowledging that there is an issue and that one step was a doozy- but you did it-!!!!! The next step is loving yourself enough to watch and realize your triggers- but by loving yourself, you will find it gets easier- and it really does- but we are here for each other- and i feel that is worth more than anything in your journey to a happier and healthier life- and I am always here if anyone needs to talk- always-
Huge hugs, many prayers and bunches of love to all-

Have a beautiful day, and always remember to love you, because you are amazing!!! Much love and light!!!


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PATTIE441's Photo PATTIE441 Posts: 42,592
7/7/13 7:32 P

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Hi Terry! I am an emotional eater too, and it is really taking over on me, with some family issues recently, and I, also was bullied in school, Aimee-Michelle. But I want to thank you, Sue, for the suggestion of Brain over Binge. I have been reading the author's blogs, and is helping a lot. Here is a link to it, and I hope it helps you Terry, and others. She has other blog links on the side of the page. emoticon
brainoverbinge.blogspot.com/search/l
ab
el/Self-Control


Edited by: PATTIE441 at: 7/7/2013 (19:35)
There is a creative child in each of us. Open your heart and invite it out to play.

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TERRY0217's Photo TERRY0217 SparkPoints: (21,713)
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7/1/13 6:42 A

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I'm an emotional eater...I think that's where most of my problem lies...I get stressed at work, and bam...if there's donughts, cookies or anything around,,,I'm right there...It's a mindless reflex to stress...

Fall seven times...get up eight.

Be still and know I am God

"I vow to let go of all worries and anxiety in order to be light and free... Freedom is not given to us by anyone; we have to cultivate it ourselves. It's a daily practice


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6/28/13 2:34 A

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I want this time to be different so I am going to a therapist who specializes in anxiety and eating disorders. She has been wonderful! I have made several discoveries about myself and had to deal with disappointments and childhood memories. It sucks to have been bullied for most of my schoolyears, but I am learning to go back and forgive those who have hurt me. It's a slow process, but it has been helping. Prior to joining the sparkpeople site I had lost 40 pounds. My therapist recommended this site as a support.

God's grace and blessings!
Aimee-Michelle


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SONSHINESUE518's Photo SONSHINESUE518 Posts: 466
6/24/13 12:26 P

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I hate that this is one of my first posts here because I don't want you all to think that I have any connection with the book I am recommending, but I have to tell you, I have been an emotional/binge eater from the age of 13 until this past February, and I am 53 now. Forty years
of bingeing. The book Brain Over Binge by Kathryn Hansen changed my life!
The premise of the book is that we binge because we are listening to our lower, or primitive brain. The part of the brain that is "us" has full control over this lower voice. Once I was able to separate the fact that my urges were not ME, it made all the difference.
I felt like such a loser because food had such power over me, and then of course that self judgment made me want to eat even more! I highly recommend that book for all of you who are struggling.
I still have the desire to overeat, but the food doesn't call my name from the refrigerator anymore!!

Edited by: SONSHINESUE518 at: 6/24/2013 (12:27)

be blessed, and be a blessing, Sue


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6/14/13 5:14 P

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I am an emotional eater. it doesnt matter what emotion i am feeling. if i have a bad day, or am feeling very upset or even just feeling hormonal, my first instinct is to eat anything and everything in sight. I have a few "comfort foods" and they are awful. in a twist of bittersweet fate, one of my favorite comfort foods, my first go-to food, the angus burger from mcdonalds, is no longer available on their menu! i was incredibly upset but at the same time, i guess its a good thing because the burger i got was over 1000 calories alone!

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6/11/13 11:07 A

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I had a bad week then overeating this pass weekend. I even wrote a blog about it and in the blog I wrote how I just said STOP. And after reading this forum I need to add the word STOP to the part about beating my self up. Feeling defeated. I have felt bad for two days now but have eaten better the past two days. I think I am still hung up on the bad days instead of just letting it go. Thanks for all your sharing partners!!!

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MOMO7YROLD's Photo MOMO7YROLD SparkPoints: (37,014)
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6/9/13 10:57 A

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Yesterday was my nieces 1st b-day party. My sister ordered a cupcake cake. A big #1 plus I had a bunch of ice cream n chips n 2 bratwurst on buns.. I went with the the intentions of only eating a little. Where I made my mistake was sitting at the table next to all food. I ate 5 cupcakes. I was so miserable I could barely breathe. I stepped on scale this mornin n gained 1.1 lbs. It could've been worse but I did 75 mins of xercise bfor I went bc I knew I was gonna chow I just didn't expect that much. I wish I had gotten up after the 2nd cupcake.

Theresa-WV
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I can do it, You can do it, set ur mind to it.
fall down, get up, dust off, move on


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JOANNATR0001's Photo JOANNATR0001 Posts: 8
5/16/13 5:06 A

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I am having a stressful and unpleasant day at work and as I am working in a restaurant environment I really want to binge! but you guys keep me so motivated. Instead of going to the kitchen I just went on this page. It makes me stronger. We won't loose this battle;)

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4EVERNESS's Photo 4EVERNESS Posts: 1,086
5/2/13 12:46 A

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Doing okay Jeromesgurl? emoticon

A better tomorrow, starts NOW!

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MOMO7YROLD's Photo MOMO7YROLD SparkPoints: (37,014)
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4/30/13 8:44 A

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Yesterday was a really rough day. I cried most of the day bc my life is a mess. My husband is still in the hospital but stable he is off lifesupport now thanks to God. He is in rehab now. My son who is autistic has had a really rough time with it all. The school Principal placed him in a day program for his behaviors. Yesterday the director of The program called me n told me they wanted to put him in a psych hospit.al in Pittsburgh. I was a mess n did not want to lose my son also. I started calling our support group to figure out what to do n in the meantime I turned to my comfort food. A big bowl of cereal. I got a grasp on it n managed to stay Worthington my limits n I did manage to lose 4 ounces. Today is looking better.

Theresa-WV
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leader of SP Class Oct 27 - Nov. 2 2013 team www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
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leader of North Central WV team www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
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I can do it, You can do it, set ur mind to it.
fall down, get up, dust off, move on


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4/30/13 8:26 A

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emoticon jennacyde for the tips.

Theresa-WV
leader of Daily Fitness Challenges Team www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=60848


leader of SP Class Oct 27 - Nov. 2 2013 team www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=60747


leader of North Central WV team www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=41616


I can do it, You can do it, set ur mind to it.
fall down, get up, dust off, move on


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JENNACYDE82's Photo JENNACYDE82 SparkPoints: (1,091)
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4/24/13 8:57 A

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Honestly... I'm not too worried about emotional eating. I do slip up now and then when I really feel bad. But I won't let it take me off my course.

What's really hard for me isn't so much emotional eating, actually when I'm really upset I feel like there's a lump in my throat and stomach, and I usually can't eat for a while. But what's hardest is leaving food when I'm full, or stopping before the plate is empty. Or getting too much to begin with because I think I'm hungrier than I am.

You get that mindset of having to finish what's on your plate. I still feel horrible about wasting food. I try to remember to just get small portions at first. I eat very slowly anyways, and I actually enjoy taking small bites, using small utensils.

Need to work on chewing more, I've done it before and it does make you feel like you ate more than you did. Also waiting a while after finishing my meal so my brain has time to get the trigger I'm full. Not drinking with meals before and after... so the food doesn't just go straight through.

Protein gives you a more full feeling, I'm supposed to be on high protein anyways... but it's true. Almonds make a great filling snack. I get my protein in first, then if I'm still really hungry after a while I can have some veggies or fruit.

Also a good trick is a hot drink between meals... always makes me feel like I ate something... usually just a boullion cube, or some hot tea does the trick. I feel the saltiness is more satisfying than the tea though.

Just wanted to share some tricks - and hope they might help

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4EVERNESS's Photo 4EVERNESS Posts: 1,086
4/24/13 12:18 A

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What if you thought of fat as little debils you needed to get rid of? and the ones in the hind end are getting you with their lil pitchforks to get you up and moving? :)

But as far as "This is hard, I want to share emotional eating" ..NO YOU DON"T...you just keep your portions to yourself thank you and don't tempt me!


Edited by: 4EVERNESS at: 4/24/2013 (00:20)
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SLIMTHICK2's Photo SLIMTHICK2 SparkPoints: (81,137)
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4/23/13 5:14 P

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I've just begun to go through some of your post here and they are all quite interesting. I love this group and am so glad I've joined. I don't know what my triggers are I just know that I eat too much too often. I used to weigh over 250lbs and with the help of this site I'm now at my present weight and needing to lose about 25 more lbs to put me at my goal weight. Over a year ago I was well on my way and I don't know what happened but I fell back and am now struggling to regain my position. I got down to 178lbs, about two weeks ago I got down to 185 but am back up again to 187 as of this morning. I need to let something go in order to move on. I don't know what stresses me or if I'm stressed at all or maybe I'm reluctant to say what these things are but I think I will eventually with the help of the Lord be able to move on and free myself from the tendency to overeat. I keep looking for something to spur me on and nothing is doing it for me I can say like the author of the book of Romans "oh wretched man that I am who can deliver me from the body of this death" and the answer "I thank God through Jesus Christ my Lord". I will win this battle.

Edited by: SLIMTHICK2 at: 4/23/2013 (17:16)

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4/21/13 4:47 P

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great advice Jeansullt.

d


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JEN_ORR Posts: 94
4/21/13 3:00 P

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Don't beat yourself up for feeling bad when someone in your family attacked you. And yes, while it was with words, that's what it was. You found a way to comfort yourself. Maybe the found made you feel bad, but you didn't strike back and hurt her - so congratulate yourself for that.

I am lucky (!!!) to have the world's greatest mother in law. But my mom can cut to the bone with a short sentence. It took me YEARS to realize that just because she said something (Oh, is that what you're wearing?) didn't mean I had to let it land (Yes, that's what I'm wearing. I look good today.) Next time, if you can, and I know it's hard, don't let it get you in between the ribs. Push her comments back in a positive way - but put them back in her court. (Oh, you didn't like the potatoes? Well, I would really love your help, next time how about you make your recipe and bring it over. OR - Well, we are trying new recipes to be a more healthy family. I'm just so lucky your son is so supportive of my attempts.)

After a while, she won't be able to get under your armor anymore.







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JEROMESGURL's Photo JEROMESGURL SparkPoints: (4,108)
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4/18/13 3:15 A

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WOW!!!! YOU GUYS ARE ALL THE GREATEST- THERE ARE SO MANY REASON WHY WE OVER-INDULGE- BOREDOM, SADNESS, LONELINESS, ANGER, TO COMPENSATE FOR WHAT WE ARE LACKING IIN OUR LIVES, LOVE, COMFORT, AND I CAN HONESTLY SAY I HAVE PROBABLY DONE EACH OF THESE AT LEAST ONCE- THAT IS ONE REASON I LOVE AND ADORE THIS TEAM SO MUCH, BECAUSE THERE IS SO MUCH LOVE HERE- SO MANY THAT SHARE OUR PAIN, AND BY HELPING EACH OTHER- AND BEING ACCOUNTABLE AND HAVING SOMEONE TO SHOUT OUT TO WHEN YOU ARE FEELING THESE EMOTIONS THAT ARE CAUSING YOU TO HURT YOU IS WORTH MORE THAN ANYTHING!!! BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT IT IS, YOU NEED TO KNOW THAT YOU ARE STRONGER THAN THIS- STRONGER THAN THE URGES, AND EVEN IF YOU DO AT TIMES OVERINDULGE- ITS OKAY!!!! WE ARE ALL HUMAN AND WE ALL HAVE ISSUES AND WE ARE ALL IN THE SAME BOAT- DO NOT ALLOW FOOD TO CONTROL YOU, YOU CAN CONTROL IT!!!! BUT NEVER BE ASHAMED FOR DOING SOMETHING THAT YOU FEEL YOU SHOULDNT', LET IT GO- LET IT ALL GO- AFTER THE FACT- SAY OKAY- I DID DO THIS, WRITE DOWN HOW YOU FELT- WHAT YOU WERE DOING, THINKING, WHAT WAS HAPPENING- WHAT CAUSED THIS TO HAPPEN- ONCE YOU START WRITING IT DOWN, AND SEE FOR YOURSELF WHY- WHEN YOU START TO FEEL THE URGE- YOU CAN DO SOMETHING TO CHANGE YOUR DIRECTION- CLEAN. READ ,WALK- WHATEVER- AND IT DOES GO AWAY- THE THING I HAVE FOUND THAT IS THE HARDEST THING IS THAT UNLIKE ALCOHOLICS OR DRUG ADDICTS, WE CANNOT STAY AWAY FROM FOOD- WE HAVE TO HAVE IT TO LIVE- BUT THROUGH LOVING YOURSELF, AND TELLING YOURSELF THAT I AM MORE THAN THIS, I AM STRONG- AND I AM WONDERFUL AND I WILL NOT DIET- BUT I WILL CHANGE THE WAY I THINK ABOUT EATING- EATING TO SUSTAIN YOUR HEALTH AND LIFE, INSTEAD OF EATING TO FILL EMPTINESS AND OTHER EMOTIONS YOU ARE FEELING ARE TWO VERY DIFFERENT ANIMALS- AND IT DOESNT HAPPEN OVERNIGHT- I HAVE BEEN DIETING FOR ALMOST 40 YEARS- YOU NAME IT, IVE DONE IT- AND THE ONE SUCCESS I HAVE FOUND, AND AM STILL FINDING , IS THAT BY LOVING YOURSELF, LOOKING AT EATING DIFFERENTLY, AND DOING THINGS TO TAKE CARE OF YOU- BEING HEALTHY AND HAPPY IS WAY MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING ELSE YOU CAN DO FOR YOURSELF- AND I KNOW THAT THIS TEAM IS MEANT FOR THAT AND OTHER PURPOSES, TO BE ABLE TO COME HERE AND KNOW THAT WE ALL WALK THE SAME ROAD, HIT THE SAME POTHOLES, TAKE THE WRONG ROAD, ETC, BUT JUST LIKE IF YOU WERE IN A CAR- IT IS PRETTY EASY TO TURN AROUND AND GO BACK DOWN THE RIGHT ROAD- RIGHT?? I AM SO AMAZED AND SO BLESSED AND THANKFUL FOR ALL OF YOU HERE- AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I HAVE THE SAME SHOES YOU DO- AND I FALL, OH BOY DO I!!!! BUT I GET BACK UP AND SAY OKAY- THAT WAS MESSED UP- BUT THAT WAS AN HOUR AGO- I HAVE ALREADY MOVED FORWARD, AND HAVE ALOT OF OPPORTUNITIES TO REDIRECT MYSELF- AND I AM GOING TO DO JUST THAT- AND DON'T WORRY- IF I NEED A GOOD STRONG KICK IN THE PANTS- YA'LL WILL BE THE FIRST TO KNOW- AND SHOULD YOU EVER NEED THE SAME- I AM HERE- WITH LOTS OF LOVE AND WHATEVER YOU NEED- ALWAYS.
LOVE, HUGS, BLESSINGS AND HAPPINESS ALWAYS MY DEAR DEAR SPARKIES
CHERISE

Have a beautiful day, and always remember to love you, because you are amazing!!! Much love and light!!!


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4/16/13 9:33 A

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I use to eat out of boredom too. One thing that helped me is to try to find others who need just a little encouragement and send them some goodies here, so I don't have time for boredom now. Ha!

Also, I use to sit and over indulge big big time. Since I have joined sparks and committed to the Lord guiding me in this journey, my life has been so totally motivated like never before.
So be encouraged there is hope for all of us. emoticon

d


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4/15/13 1:32 P

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I find my emotional eating is also triggered by boredom. This was a huge problem for me in the evenings. I am really trying to tackle this problem head on, and it's a struggle, but I refuse to give up. I want to be the winner this time. I am winning. I am reaching out to family, spark friends, trying new things, to really tackle this problem.

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4/15/13 11:00 A

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I am with you on the emotional eating piece and just joined this group. I give you so much credit for being upfront. I used to view this as my dirty little secret. Used to eat an entire box of crackers at one sitting when I was feeling sad or depressed. I also used to binge on pasta and cake and ice cream anything to put in my mouth to dull the pain. I can't say that I have conqured this each day is a struggle but so far I have managed to stay at my goal weight for six months. However, I am terrified. You can do it though if I did it anyone can. I am diagnosed with depression.

4EVERNESS's Photo 4EVERNESS Posts: 1,086
4/15/13 12:04 A

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Please don't share emotional eating...you might have cheesecake or black forest torte to share and I don't resist those well LOL

A better tomorrow, starts NOW!

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BIOLOCO1001's Photo BIOLOCO1001 SparkPoints: (309)
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4/14/13 4:14 P

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Emotional eating is something that is hard to deal with. My comfort food is not healthy and with bipolar my emotions are on a rollercoaster. I have a hard time staying away from the mac and cheese and hotdogs usually. I am trying to be better but each day has millions of different things that set me off.

Life is too short to spend on a couch.


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4/6/13 3:21 P

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Wow.
-
I have read everyones post and I feel the pain. I am so glad for this group. It is nice to have people that we can all relate too.
-
I don't have the same reasoning for eating as most. Sometimes I eat when I am bored, or stressed but mostly I eat to have a break. I was skinny for many years, 120 - 130 lbs. Course then I always thought I was fat. I didn't start eating more until my second marriage. I was very happy and comfortable. My husband works very hard, long days, and as a good wife I like to have a nice hearty meal on the table for him. Because of this I spend a lot of time cooking and I want to sit down and enjoy the food. This is the time that I get to spend with my husband and family each day. He can eat and eat and eat and not gain a pound. He is a slow eater, I am a fast eater. So I will sit at the table and eat and enjoy the company. Not to mention this is usually the only time that I really sit down and relax the whole day. So I will have seconds maybe thirds. In my mind this justifies me sitting down to relax.
-
I LOVE FOOD.
-
Together we can get through this. Thanks so much for everyone sharing. It really touched a special place in my heart. Keep strong.

Where there is a will, there is a way!

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Frustrations - Finding foods that the whole family will eat.


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4/5/13 12:35 P

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to all of you who had the courage and strength to post here- I am so proud and inspired and so blessed to know such brave and courageous people- yes- there are always reasons behind why we do these things to ourselves- but through Him who fills us, who loves us, and by loving ourselves, and knowing that that love is unfailing and never ending, despite how we could ever feel about ourselves, is the biggest step, along with loving ourselves, you took the first step in admitting not only to yourselves, but to others who not only share your pain, but LOVE YOU and are here for you no matter what- i am- always- please contact me anytime with anything- or each other- talking about it -especially when we get that urge to do so and knowing we have our partners to go to or at least some one here to chat to when we need is a comfort in itself- i love all of you- you truly have me in awe with how amazing and wonderful and beautiful all of you are-
i am having issues right now with other things in my life-that sometimes keep me down- i have ra, oa, fibro, copd, and sometimes it overwhelms me- but most of he time it is controlled and i am here almost all the time- the last few days have had me away-but i still check in- please- never ever feel alone here- you are where you should be- and together with His love and help- we will overcome- this is not about dieting or losing weight-this is about loving yourself- being happy- and being healthy- and learning a lifestyle and making changes to live happily and healthily- still being able to have the chocolate- occasionally-because what is life if we cannot enjoy it- it is about making choices that allow us to do that- eating to nourish and fuel instead of comfort- working our bodies to make them strong and flexible and feeling good- and taking care of what He created- as he created us in His image- each one- and each one He knows and loves intimately- YOU!!!! Each one of you is special and beautiful and amazing- and I bet if you sat down and thought about it for just a moment-and took a look at you- your accomplishments all through your life and things you have done and overcome- and just getting to the points in life where you are- be proud of each little thing- for it is no small thing to Him- and celebrate!!!! Even if is as small as not eating that last piece of pie or drinking you water or eating all your veggies or getting your exercise minutes in- or just going about your daily chores- feeding your families-and taking care of them- your precious pets or praising Him, and loving one another and being kind to not only other but yourself, and being forgiving to someone and especially yourself- its the little things that add up to the big ones- and be proud of who and what you are for you are all amazing-
please friend me if you havent already- and know that we are all here for each other- and there are others too that are as well- i love you-
hugs, happiness, blessings and prayers, always,
cherise

Have a beautiful day, and always remember to love you, because you are amazing!!! Much love and light!!!


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JSNOW999's Photo JSNOW999 SparkPoints: (2,430)
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4/5/13 12:07 P

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I don't have a HUGE emotional eating problem but I do tend to feel munchy when stressed and bored. I am working on both! But I understand the struggle, believe me.

This is one reason I like the idea of this team; so we can get support BEFORE we eat that jar of Nutella, when we're feeling those impulses. emoticon

Jae

Today is a new day with no calories in it!



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4/5/13 12:33 A
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Wow, I can feel everyone's pain. I mean, literally with tears streaming down my face. I know I eat for emotional reasons. I think I have always miss handled emotions in one way or the other. We can only do what we know and we only know what we've been taught. Please know that I am not blaming my parents for this because they could only teach what they had been taught; and I know they loved me the best way they knew how. ....However, I did not make it out of childhood undamaged. I am broken, it's a fact. I do not feel sorry for myself because I believe that everyone is broken in some way shape or form....life hurts; it is not fair and sometimes it is unbearably painful.
When I was young I know I used food to soothe me. I was young though and like many, I never gained weight. I was tall and than and it seemed that I could eat anything and it would not cause weight gain......When I got a little older I switched from food to cigarettes....Yeah I smoked when I was bored, I smoked when I was angry; I smoked when I was numb and did not even know how I felt....I smoked for 31 years. I was thin, coughed constantly and always had a sore throat. With God's help I quit smoking approx 3 1/2 years ago. I know God helped me to stop smoking. However when I stopped smoking I started eating. I gained (and this is horrible and shameful to admit) 49 pounds since I stopped smoking. I now have diabetes because of my poor food choices....so I know this has to stop.....I keep telling myself that God got me through many things, among them are: cancer and he helped me to stop smoking. I know that he can help me to have the right relationship with food also. And I guess it is a relationship that I have had with food most of my life and it has not been a healthy one. If you read the poem I posted on my blog 4/3 you would know that there has been allot of pain in my life. There has also been allot of joy and peace and love. I believe that God had gotten me through the worst of it and I just need to step out in faith and trust that he can help me face the emotions that I've been running from all my life. He created emotions...and God knows me better than anyone else does. He knows my past, my present and my future. Not only that I believe that God wants me, us, to come to Him with everything. He knows the secrets of my heart and he knows why I eat, even when I don't know. I've got Bible verses written that are suppose to inspire me to go to God instead of food. I made copies and put them in conveniently located places.....Those verses don't do me any good when I choose to go to the food first. So I think what I need is for God to change my heart. So right now I am asking God to please give me a heart that will go to Him for all my needs. God, please change my heart so that I would seek you first and nothing else. Give me a heart that would bring my boredom, or anger, or insecurities to you, give me a heart that truly believes that you are big enough to meet my emotional needs........ok, If you read all of this, thanks for hanging in there with me, and I hope you said that prayer with me. If you did, be brave enough to let me know and we can pray for each other....anyway, thank you for reading and hearing me out.

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4/4/13 4:22 P

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The path to obesity is a long and winding one, even though the pounds seem to sneak on board literally overnight. All we have to do is trace back where we started from to unravel the mystery of why we do what we do. We do nothing without a reason or without a benefit, primarily we eat to neutralize our active sensation of pain and turn it into a dull realization that something is wrong, preferably something we don't quite understand, so that we lose the immediate threat of being in the middle of something we do not know how to handle. As I stare out of my window and ask myself what I am running from -- nothing comes to mind. Nothing that would make me burst into tears -- as it ought to. I just hear the monotony of the rain drops falling from the roof and the roar of distant traffic, and it is hard to tell that I wanted it this way. I chose to dull my senses to the point where I am used to feeling ill at ease without one single reference point to guide me gently to the cause of all my trouble that only exposes itself when I step on the scale, shop for new clothes, or glance in the mirror. Binge eating I seem to have filled under the heading of 'A Treat Well-Deserved' since it happens all too often. I have been able to postpone dealing with the issue in this supposedly clever way -- sigh -- for years. As you can tell, this is a very sterile version of what I really wanted to write, because I'm afraid that if I really gave in to the panic that I have truly trapped myself, I really would have to conclude that I'm no longer in charge of my problems re. weight. As I am writing this, I feel a great deal of unease welling up in me for even letting my fingers hit the -- blank! Can't even think how to finish the sentence. However, I am here with you, slowly uncovering what is holding me back. Love and ((hugs)) to all. Thank you for patiently reading. emoticon

"What distinguishes those of us at the starting line from those of us on the couch is that we learn through running to take what the days give us, what our body will allow us, and what our will can tolerate." John Bingham


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4/3/13 9:17 P

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I'm with you all, too! Stress, emotions, and boredom! A while ago, I thought back to what started this boredom/mindless eating and I realized it was sometime around 11-13 years of age. My parents & brother all worked during the day and I was home alone. They were all in Amway at the time and went to meetings all the time. One Saturday each month, they'd leave around 11am and not return till 11pm! I was BORED! We had a pool, but I couldn't use it alone, I had no nearby friends. So, I watched TV or read all afternoon...and ate and ate and ate. I never gained any weight out of it, thankfully, but the bad habits are still with me today. I suppose now that I realize it, I can work on it. I really need to find some things to do to keep myself and my hands occupied so I don't reach for the food!

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4/3/13 3:26 P

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Such timing! I actually just wrote a blog post about this a few minutes ago. I'm a stress/emotional eater and it can be very difficult! Cherise, I can totally relate to cleaning up in the kitchen and just eating and eating. Thank you all for sharing as well! Emotional eating is a tough battle to face. Cherise, I will be praying for you!

Headed to healthy & fit!


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4/3/13 4:20 A

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To alll of you that commented and shared today- what brave brave women you are to be able to talk about it- it IS hard- because you are admitting PAIN, something you are usually doing something else to forget about- another thing i get is alot of boredom and pleasers- and mostly at the same time- and us pleasers are not getting appreciated- and as a matter of fact- are not getting treated very nicely at all- which was alot of my issue too- while it is good to love our bodies and feed them to make them healthy- LOVING OURSELVES is so much more important- because once you reject unacceptable behavior - and yes, I am learning this too, you shoulda seen me before- and love ourselves, that unacceptable behavior wont matter- be form a bounce shield- around us- some of us use the Lord, I so do, others use what they need, what is right for them, and that is okay too- as long as that shield is up- the im rubber youre glue-=yeah!!! we had something then!!!! When we place all our happiness in doing or trying for others, we loose our own happiness along the way- and fill it with other things- alcohol-drugs, food, and other destructive behaviors start to emerge as a way to punish ourselves because we should have- no no no no no!!!! one of my friends that i hadnt talked to in awhile was great at first, but then the behavior started again- and i instead of just not saying anything because, yes, believe it or not, i do have those moments where i do shut up- lol, but just to not displease or start a confrontation- i normally would not say anything- this time i did. and i did it very nicely, but instead or her best interests, i had mine- and as i knew it would happen, she got mad and said i changed and hung up- and ya know what- that was a great thing to hear!!! cuse i have changed- i am not the same because i can finally look in the mirror and say i love me- and the people pleaser is still there- pulleeze- she will alwayz be there- but the destructive need to be a pleaser for love, she isnt there- because she has it- not only from our beautiful Lord, but from me- and I want you all to know- you have it from me too- you do not have to do anything but be you- who and what you are- and i think you are all amazing- and i share love with you all- thank you for being here- i always will be- and just remember- love you- the rest does fall into place-
goodnight, my dear, sweet wonderful friends, sleep the sleep of angels, and
hugs, happiness, and blessings, and love, always
cherise

Have a beautiful day, and always remember to love you, because you are amazing!!! Much love and light!!!


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4/3/13 1:18 A

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Cherise, emoticon to you!

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4/2/13 10:49 P

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Being mindful and recognizing your triggers is a HUGE step, keep your mind clear and focus on what YOU want to achieve. I have learned to do this and know now the distractions need to be something that is going to benefit me in a good way. Keep the faith!

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4/2/13 10:27 P

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Cherise, I can relate to you . . . oh how I can relate. For me, hurt does weaken my resolve quite a bit. I forget my goals as I dive into the food to distract myself. Stress, and boredom also send me straight to the fridge. Anger makes me clean oddly enough and with exteme nervousness I can't even think of eating. It's good to be able to identify these things. Tonight I was bored so I decided to take a walk. I've given into the boredom the last two nights and overeaten. When I got home I had forgotten my keys. I rang the doorbell and could hear my husband in the room near the front door. Apparently he didn't care to let me in and started yelling for his daughter to do it but she was ignoring him (or maybe she really didn't hear him screaming at the top of his lungs) but meanwhile I'm waiting for my own family to let me in the house. My husband finally let me in but he was glaring at me. Yikes. My feelings were pretty hurt but I was also mad! You should see my clean kitchen. Now that I've calmed down I would like nothing more than to go eat. I really really really want to so bad. I'm just not going to. So I'm sitting here trying to distract myself with Spark. In a little bit I will go to bed and read. It's a neverending battle and I hope to fight the good fight with God's help.

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4/2/13 8:59 P

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First off, just want to give you a hug! I know what you're going through. I've been there.

I didn't get to weigh 425 pounds without being an emotional eater! Any and all emotions would cause me to eat. Happy, sad, mad, upset, whatever! Food was my way to blunt any strong feeling I had.

I would binge and binge and binge. Eat enough food that the thought of it now makes me sick. But at the time...

I had a person in my life that significantly contributed to why I was eating like I was eating. I understand that you care for your mother-in-law, but... her behavior is clearly not helping you. The person in my life that treated me that way was not helping me, either.

She would claim that she wanted me to lose weight. She would claim that she'd eat whatever healthy thing I made for dinner. But when the time came, and it was set in front of her... she'd take one bite, complain about how it wasn't like hers, and then refuse to eat any more of it. She'd ask for a bowl of ice cream.

And the thing is, I would have made her whatever she wanted to eat. I had no problem cooking two separate dinners. But she'd always say she'd eat whatever we ate. And it was - in general - a lie.

I can't count the number of times I would be doing good on a diet - I'd have lost like 50 or 75 pounds! - and she'd do something to really upset me, and bam, I'd go off on a binge that never ended. I kept trying not to let her derail me, but she always did.

Now that she's gone, I ask myself, why did she behave in that way? I've come up with a few ideas, but really, it doesn't matter. I keep praying for God to help me forgive her for the things she did - what I mention above was just the tip of the iceberg - and He has. I won't say completely, because I still have a lot of pain over her behavior. But The Lord has helped me.

I've lost 128 pounds and I'm still losing and I couldn't have done any of it without God's help. Please don't give up. I've stopped eating for emotional reasons, and it's been the hardest thing I've ever done. Seriously. At first, I'd just walk around in a circle, crying, because I did not know what to do with the pain. I was so used to eating it away. I made myself stop - with lots of prayer! - but it was HARD.

You can do it. We all can. We just can't give up.

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MYSTERIOUS-LADY's Photo MYSTERIOUS-LADY Posts: 1,399
4/2/13 6:07 P

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emoticon all around

Never Give Up . . . Never Surrender

Do not give up what you want the most for what you want at the moment.



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4/2/13 4:22 P

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I am so thankful for all that comes to this thread and shares from their hearts.. I once was an emotional eater. As I look back at the pictures of years past, I see how each year the pounds increased. I ate out of boredom, sometimes just wanting a close friend to talk too, Often, I would try to avoid crowds thinking everyone was looking at me and feeling like I was the largest there. However, I realized that with these attitudes, I was causing myself more and more damage. I surrendered the spiritual part of my life to a closer walk with the Lord and through gratitude for all he had done for me I just wanted to share Him everywhere. I started teaching Sunday School and then felt led to teach Bible Studies in the local jail. Yet, as I served the Lord more, I always felt there was a link between my physical life and my spiritual life. I knew my health was not as good due to overeating and the increasing weight was really affecting my spine and my legs. I knew my body was a temple of the Holy Spirit and I should take better care of it for I would be able to do the things that He would guide me to do. However, I kept telling myself I could not quit eating the way I was, and that being overweight ran in my family. (one excuse after another). The last week of 2012, I knew I was going to have to do something. By January 1st, I had surrender my weight to the Lord and I am living out the verse Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ which strengthenths me! I claim this every day! Since I am living this verse in his strength, I have been motivated every single day. With his help, I KNOW I am going to accomplish what I have never done before. I am going to lose this weight. I say it on this side of faith. I know my Lord is with me and is helping me. Then he blessed me with starting this team. I took a step out of my comfort zone and thought I may be the only member, but I needed to do this not only for me, but surely others felt the same way, too. I am so humbled to see so many join this team. Thank you for coming. May we with help from one another find this an enjoyable journey together as we find success week after week. Let's enjoy every pound that we lose and not just be focused on the last pound. Thank you Jesus for your help. I know you will help any and all who will put their trust and faith in you.

Edited by: 63KEEPONGOING at: 4/5/2013 (06:56)
d


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4/2/13 3:52 P

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Aw, Ruthie, Thank you so much for sharing with me- my mom came from a family of obesity and became neurotic- and of course i now belong to the eating disorder family- and i think i have mostly controlled everything- it just happens once in awhile- and i do give it all to the Lord, and it does help- I do live with my mother-in-law-, and you really cannot talk to her-and here are alot of reasons- but my husband and i are very close and very close to the Lord and we talk about it and i have never been one to hold resentments- never- I used to take it out on myself- but i am good about that-I can honestly say that I do love myself- something I truly hope everyone on this team does, or someday can do- because it does change your life.
You are truly a dear for sharing with me too- and I am certainly very grateful for it. I just hope that other that see it will know they are never alone- and there are always friends to-share anything no matter what it is, but there is always, and I don't care what it is, there is always someone who has walked in your shoes, and it is very comforting sometimes just to know that.
Thank you again, precious friend, I look forward to many more chats with you in the future...
Hugs, happiness and blessings always,
cherise

Have a beautiful day, and always remember to love you, because you are amazing!!! Much love and light!!!


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4/2/13 3:13 P

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Thank you for sharing this with us, Cherise. It takes a certain kind of courage to open up like you did. I don't do emotional eating. I come from a family of obese women. My mother has always been at least 100 pounds overweight and it gets worse the older she gets, she is now about 325 and one of my sisters is 340. I decided at 14 to never let myself get in that shape so I don't eat when I am emotional. I think the most over weight I have ever been is 52 pounds. That said... I do occasionally do "binge" eating - line me up to the troth type - and end up sick because of overeating. I don't even know what sets it off.

If I am not getting too personal here... Does you mother-in-law live with you? Maybe you should have a heart-to-heart talk with her and explain that you are trying to cook more healthy for all of you and that she hurt your feelings with her remarks. I have harbored hurt in my heart in the past. Getting it out in the open always helped me to deal with hurt or anger. It keeps me from holding grudges which hurt me more than the ones I was mad at. Some people don't listen and that is when I give it to God. And you are right, some things are hard to let go of. Especially when you are hurt by someone you love very much. You are in my thoughts and prayers dear one.

Much love and emoticon ,

Ruth

Ruth

"Adam fell that men might be, and men are that they might have joy."


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4/2/13 12:58 P

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Hey ya'll- I really feel like I am surrounded my so many friends here- I wanted to share about something that I know many of my fellow sparkies share- and it's hard to admit sometimes- let alone talk about- but emotional eating sometimes affects all of us at one point or another- i have had many times- ( i could never list them all) but i'll give you an example- I love to cook- love it- and i would like to consider myself a good cook- and coming from the south- sometimes yeah- things aren't so healthy- but i am working on changing that- and making recipes that are not only yummy and remind you of your grandmothers or momma's cooking- but that have less calories and fat- and add somethings that are way healthier too- well- i made a wonderful dinner of my baked fried chicken- sauteed' asparagus with olive oil and garlic, mashed potatoes mixed with cauliflower- (seriously- you cannot tell and it is yummy!!!) and i made egg custard - surprisingly low in fat and calories and has alot of good stuff too- and i worked very hard on this dinner- well, my mother in law just complained about everything- and i'm not talking bad about her- i love her to death- and i understand- she likes things a certain way- but i tried- but from how everything was so fattening to it didnt taste like hers to it wasnt how she would do it- just cut me to the bone- and it shouldn't have-i prayed and i tried very hard to give it to God- but after she went to bed- and i was cleaning up-i did eat alot more food and i don't eat alot as it is-you can feel free to look at my journals for that- but i did- i ate like 3 extra pieces of chicken- and another custard- and as i normally wounldn't have- i did it because i was hurt- and i wanted to fill that space that wanted that appreciation and happiness, because the whole reason i love to cook is to make those i love happy-and everyone i feed- ( and i'll feed anyone- comeon' over-lol :) ) But i don't do this alot- but i do from time to time- now- if anyone out there sometimes does the same thing- please- feel free to share- i truly feel that by sharing we could help each other through it- and if you have a hard time sharing- let me know and if there are a few of you-i can pair you up if you like- just as another partner who understands- sometimes its good to have a few partners who understand different things you go through- and we can get through this together-whether it is prayer- sharing, friendship, meditation, whatever works for you- please let's get together and help each other through this- i know not only will it make us feel better to help one another- and that is what this group is all about- but it will make us healthier not only mentally, for the guilt and things you feel when you do "stuff your feelings" but physically, for the obvious reasons. This honestly wasn't an easy thing to share- but I do feel so close to all of you-and i feel safe here-and i hope ya'll do too- it is really something I honestly needed to get out- and maybe if i put myself out there- i can help someone who is going through this too- I am grateful to be able to share- i adore everyone and i am here- and i thank you if you have read this- and if you should share or write me- you are truly my hero-
hugs, happiness and blessings always,
cherise

Have a beautiful day, and always remember to love you, because you are amazing!!! Much love and light!!!


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