Author: Sorting Last Post on Top ↓ Message:
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
9/16/14 11:46 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I've swung from sleeping all the time to a rather bipolar energy mix of sleeping all the time and then being up two to three nights in a row to sleeping all the time to being up two to three nights in a row, and it is EXHAUSTING... and wouldn't you know it I would catch a break right as my turn to see the med nurse comes around.

Its someone new and she was totally dismissive, saying that schizoaffective disorder is "of course like bipolar" So this is what I'm stuck with until she leaves. Fortunately the last few people have only stayed a little over a year or so, so maybe I'll have a new person next year around this time. The only thing she switched in my medication was my Wellbutrin from SR to XR (short release to extended release)

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
8/10/14 6:03 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
And I didn't keep up my good streak.. July was basically a bust for me. Fortunately the voices and delusions are back next to nill now and all I have to deal with is the depression, which is formidable.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
7/13/14 4:23 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I am now doing a lot better.. since I slept over 15 hours a day for six days I didn't feel like sleeping on the 11th so I stayed up.. and last night when I went to bed I purposefully cancelled my alarms. I slept 8 hours.

We'll see if it holds. I'm suffering anxiety thinking of a subject I have to talk to Dad about tomorrow, but after talking with one of my friends, its okay again. Oh and I'm showering and brushing my teeth again too.. And I counted calories for the first day since a year or more and I was in my calorie budget!!

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
7/11/14 1:59 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I am struggling with decompensation. I sleep all day and don't shower. don't brush teeth.. don't wash my hair.. I finally got up today and made myself shower and dress in one motion.

In getting my coverage back, which is a phenomenally good thing, I have therapy coverage again and sent around a message to my bible study ladies and others that I wanted to check in with. I forgot that I got zero sympathy when my benefits were cut from my Bible study, and that they thought I didn't need therapy, wasn't sick enough for therapy, was using it as a crutch and an excuse etc. Really, maybe I thought because I was taking steps to work on something myself that maybe it would be okay. But I just got a message back from the leader of the bible study telling me to pray and study scriptures in regard to pursuing my therapy, so I'm thinking I may have to drop all my Bible study ladies as well, which is going to really reduce the number of RL friends I have.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
7/4/14 5:49 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I have appointments for July 15th (the second one YAY) with my counselor, who has been hired full time after serving as my intern WOOT! And a digestive health appointment for August 20th.

My mood is fluctuating wildly because of all the delusions and auditory hallucinations I've been experiencing the past two days, but if I can distract myself enough I actually feel better. Plus Roger, my SO has been giving me my allowance even though I lost my wallet yesterday after seeing an accident in a parking lot (ultimately no one was hurt even though it was truck vs pedestrian). The things I wanted were online and my debit card was in my wallet, so he put my play money on a green dot visa so I could still buy my books n things online. Today he took me to the book sale in the park and let me pick as many books as I wanted.

I have a blog now. It's theresareed15.wordpress.com I posted last night when I was feeling worse and couldn't seem to connect with people.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
6/21/14 10:28 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I'm wildly happy today because I got a letter from DSHS saying that I now have medical coverage and that I no longer have a spenddown. My mental health services have been suspended for at least two months, so I am ready to have this fixed. One of the first things I am doing on Monday is to phone and set up an appointment!

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
RHEASPARKS's Photo RHEASPARKS Posts: 69
6/21/14 12:28 A

Reply
My mental health was good today. I was relaxed and danced in the park concert. I met friends and it was just wild time. I feel so happy while I"m dancing. it's so wonderful, but unfortunately, my depression seeps back in by the morning. emoticon

Edited by: RHEASPARKS at: 6/21/2014 (00:28)
RHEASPARKS's Photo RHEASPARKS Posts: 69
6/21/14 12:25 A

Reply
ISTRALOUISE: Hey Yeah, I even recommend it on those days that you want to stay home. Sometimes all the traffic, crowds,and people will annoy me, so I stay in, then it's fun to work out to dancing, kickboxing, or pilates DVDs, just as long as I don't do too much exercise. I take a mental health day once in awhile and take all my exercise inside the home where I can recuperate until I can function fully again.

Edited by: RHEASPARKS at: 6/21/2014 (00:26)
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
6/19/14 11:42 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Can you do DVD's or videos inside? That's what I do most of the time

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ANI_LILANGEL's Photo ANI_LILANGEL Posts: 117
6/17/14 2:32 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
just been really depressed. And i do not feel safe walking outside, so i don't.

I can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me!


 current weight: 200.0 
 
200
181.25
162.5
143.75
125
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
6/16/14 9:58 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I'm so sorry to hear that, Angel! Could you tell us a little more about what is going on?

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ANI_LILANGEL's Photo ANI_LILANGEL Posts: 117
6/15/14 7:35 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
no wlaking in the last 2 months... feeling really deppressed and put all my weight back on. life sucks


I can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me!


 current weight: 200.0 
 
200
181.25
162.5
143.75
125
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
6/15/14 3:26 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Well I am in 2nd month of spend-down, meaning I have no mental health services until my paperwork goes through. I have an appointment with a med provider scheduled for the 18th of June, but unless I find out that my case has been taken off the spend-down list, I'm going to have to phone on Tuesday and tell them I need to reschedule.

In lieu of therapy I've been asking people in my support network whether they would mind being an accountability partner for me. I've selected one and have begun to work on getting up in the morning and staying up all day. I'm working from a book called "Frumps to Pumps" by Sarah Mae. It is just supposed to take a month, but I'm working about three exercises a week instead of 7, so Its going to take me a bit longer.

It's going well enough that I'm thinking of cutting back on therapy to once or twice a month from four or five times a month.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
4/16/14 5:28 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
So its been a long time since I or anyone else has checked in. I love my intern-therapist! but her term is coming to an end sometime in May. I've been struggling with mood. Actually... without the psych-speak.. I've been struggling with hiding in bed all day..

I've had two good days this last week, and both of them had coffee as a common denominator. Anyone else find that they just NEED 2-3 cups of coffee in the morning to feel like they can accomplish anything or simply FACE the day ahead. The difference between coffee/no coffee is soo different that I'm planning on buying more for next month. I finally got the delay on my coffee pot to work, so it brewed coffee at 6:30 this morning and I woke up after 7.

Unfortunately, I found out I have to wait until my permanent license gets here to replace my social security card and my medicare card probably won't be here until after my appointment is scheduled for, so I need to cancel the appointment and make another one.
Fortunately, I am just unflappable today, so this hasn't slowed me down.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
3/9/14 11:21 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Way to Go Angellll!!!!!


emoticon emoticon

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
3/9/14 10:49 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Sounds like you are moving in the right direction!!! Keep up the good work!!! I am proud of you!!!




"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


 Pounds lost: 3.1 
 
0
29.75
59.5
89.25
119
ANI_LILANGEL's Photo ANI_LILANGEL Posts: 117
3/9/14 5:27 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Today was a good day. I got in a hour walk, and a good nap. I also stayed under 1500 cal. I am down 5 lbs. I hope I can keep it going.

I can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me!


 current weight: 200.0 
 
200
181.25
162.5
143.75
125
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
3/7/14 7:08 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I know for me the stress of just figuring out what would make a good employee set me back to not caring for myself as well, so employment probably isn't in my future, but I really am encouraged to see others able to go back to work. My best friend isn't sza but is employed as a peer support specialist and others I know have gone back to work. (((((((((HUGS)))))))))) I hope it works out well for you. SSI isn't much to live on.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ANI_LILANGEL's Photo ANI_LILANGEL Posts: 117
3/7/14 7:59 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Grief takes it own road, and can come back around at any unsuspected time. It is good you were at the T when it hit you so you could talk it out. I have not worked in 2 years and have thought about trying to get another job, but I'm quit afraid of it as I end up back in the hospital over the stress of work. I to am on SSDI and can only work so many hours with out loosing it. I hope you can find just the right job that fits you and with just the right amount of hours.

I can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me!


 current weight: 200.0 
 
200
181.25
162.5
143.75
125
WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
3/7/14 6:58 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Good morning....Yesterday was 10 months. I was ok until I realized it. I had a counseling appointment and I go with a friend of mine who also utilizes the counseling services there. We talked the whole way down there (it's an hour away) and I was fine. Then I realized the date when I signed in and started to cry in the waiting room. I felt like an idiot but my counselor told me something encouraging. With my schizoaffective, I am doing remarkably well with the fact that I loss my wife/partner/best friend of 22 1/2 years. It's nice to have affirmation on the fact.

Today, I have an appointment with a local some-kinda group that helps disabled people get jobs in the community. I went to one already but it was more or less of an intake. I have no idea what we are doing today. My counselor and shrink have both limited me to part-time work but that actually works out with my disability so I can still collect it and make some extra money on the side legally.

Have a good day and try to look at something and smile. It will change your whole perspective!!!

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


 Pounds lost: 3.1 
 
0
29.75
59.5
89.25
119
ANI_LILANGEL's Photo ANI_LILANGEL Posts: 117
3/6/14 7:05 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Thank you ISTRALOUISE... There are no shoulders to walk on Persia. But we do have the neighbor hood, the problem there is that people do not have their dogs tied up or fenced a lot of the time, and they will chase you and nip at your heals. I started carrying my mace again. It helps me to feel a little bit safer.

I can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me!


 current weight: 200.0 
 
200
181.25
162.5
143.75
125
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
3/6/14 6:51 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Its okay.. I think I've grown used to the fact that the boards are a breeze in and out, check-in place for most of us.. We are just happy that you dropped by to say you are okay and what is going on in your life.

When I was dealing with more anxiety I actually used Edmund Bourne's Anxiety and Phobia Handbook and Beyond Anxiety and Phobia. I was told I didn't have a anxiety disorder, but the fear really seemed to respond well to some of the tactics I learned that were meant to be used with an anxiety disorder.

I'm sorry there are no sidewalks :( That makes life difficult because it actually could be dangerous to walk along the road without them, depending on how wide the shoulder of the road is.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ANI_LILANGEL's Photo ANI_LILANGEL Posts: 117
3/6/14 5:31 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Hi all. It has been a long time since I was here last. Time just goes by when you are depressed and Hibernating in Isolation. I have just started to get out and walk again. I had been having so much anxiety and fear about being out of the house that I was not doing much of anything. Im not struggling much with my SZ but have been having a large amount of fear. I put on all the weight I took off in 2010 (a total of 90 lbs) and now am starting all over again to take it off. I have really been dealing with a lot of self hate and anger.

The move my husband and I made across country in 2012 did not help. We are living in the country and there are no sidewalks and lots of traffic on our street, so I am trying to walk the neighbor hood with out feeling scared out of my witts. I am not going to promise I will be back soon, but I am always around once in a while so I will try to stop by more often. Glad to see you are still here.

Ani_lilangel

I can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me!


 current weight: 200.0 
 
200
181.25
162.5
143.75
125
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
2/26/14 9:21 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Thank you so much, Oona. I feel the same way.. It would be so easy.. especially with my recent back problems, to end up bed bound, and Roger and I (my SO) talked about it.. and I soo.. don't want to go there!

But anyone can do it! Which means I can do it! Which means I have hope!

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
2/24/14 12:37 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I just watched that video and started crying. I wanted that for Kathy. She was 400 + lbs and wasn't walking anymore. She could've done it. But, I cannot change what is done. But, I can keep myself from getting there!!!! I may not lose 140 lbs in a year, but I can lose 50 and that is my goal. I am keeping my eye on the prize and doing what is necessary!!

Just keep taking baby steps toward your goal and you will get there!! Eventually they will become LEAPS AND BOUNDS!!!

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


 Pounds lost: 3.1 
 
0
29.75
59.5
89.25
119
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
2/24/14 8:52 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I have my clinician again today. I narrowly succeeded at my talk with my SO and exercise 3 times a week for 15 minutes, but a success is a success. This week I bump up my time to 20 minutes of cardio. I did 21 this morning.

I found the following really inspirational and am including it here:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX9FSZJu448

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
2/10/14 6:40 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Hi CPrice!

I understand about clarity but not wanting to go back. The nicest thing I can say about my last hospital visit, and one of the only nice things I can say, is that I was stable afterward. Still doesn't mean I want to EVER end up there again.

I'm sorry to hear that you're having some issues, Oona. Confusion and anxiety are not much fun. You've been seeing everyone and taking your meds as normal right? I sometimes have to guess if I don't use the weekly pill container thingy that Roger got for me, whether or not I took the pills at the right time or not.

Then again just spinning wheels not being able to focus is hard enough and I've been there too.. Have you been able to relax any and do recreational things? Like movies or comedy routines, games? It may still be a bit early, but it might be a good time to try to start distracting yourself when you feel frustrated with your progress.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
2/9/14 9:00 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I have been having a hard time lately, don't know what I'm doing or missing or what's going on!!! Just alot of anxiety, some depression, alot of confusion. I am getting really frustrated, too!!

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


 Pounds lost: 3.1 
 
0
29.75
59.5
89.25
119
WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
2/5/14 9:48 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
That is awesome, CPrice!!! Take it one day at a time. Don't push yourself. Just do what you KNOW you can handle, and before you know it, it'll be a long, funfilled list!!!

I'm doing so so....took a little derailment and quit taking my meds for a week. That wasn't so smart. I am taking them again. I miss Kathy everyday but it is getting easier. In about 23 1/2 hours it will be 9 months. And they seem to go by slower and slower but I am working on not counting time.

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


 Pounds lost: 3.1 
 
0
29.75
59.5
89.25
119
CPRICE408's Photo CPRICE408 SparkPoints: (1,952)
Fitness Minutes: (415)
Posts: 15
2/4/14 6:53 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I always liked seeing the resident psychiatrists that were only there for a year and then they left.

Anyway, I have good news! I have been un-institutionalized for the first time in three years since December 30! I'm being careful though, because I don't want to have to go back there. I am truly thankful. So far so good! It is this reason that my mental health check in is ...AWESOME ...LOL.

 current weight: 405.0 
 
405
397.5
390
382.5
375
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
2/4/14 1:37 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I like seeing the interns.. they have a fresh perspective and are not burned out yet.. just a question of how long I get one for. I have a lot to work on with this one.. and I am happy to say I get her every week now. But thank you for your tips. There's really only one other agency I could go to and I'm not sure how it would affect my housing, since my housing is a shelter + care ticket through my current mental health agency.

How are you doing, Oona? Please let us know, and thanks for replying!!!

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
2/3/14 8:29 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Glad to hear you are making progress!! That's wonderful news. I know it may not seem like TREMENDOUS progress, but it is definitely a step in the right direction.

Some places are forced to keep costs down-due to being state funded-and do so by employing interns. I have found this to be in many places that service the mentally ill. They want to help, but being that so many mentally ill people are un-employed, on disability, under-employed or homeless, they do not have the "best" insurance and so they often help "pay the bills" through state funding.

If you do not feel as if you are getting help from your local provider, if possible, look to the next one, and even the next one after that. Sometimes it means another 1/2 hour an appointment, but if it means your health, you should do it!! If it was cancer, you would, wouldn't you!??!?!?

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


 Pounds lost: 3.1 
 
0
29.75
59.5
89.25
119
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
2/2/14 11:15 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
And I have a counselor! She is an intern and I don't know how long I have her for.

We are going to work on the feelings that led to the overspending in December, on credit and cash basis.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
1/14/14 7:24 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I'm glad that you got to keep your New Years traditions and that you will be okay.

I am up at 4:22am .. slept most of the last 5 days.. just making the wrong decisions. I think I need to see a counselor. I haven't been to see one since November sometime.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
1/1/14 11:22 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Surprise, surprise. I lived through New Year's Eve!! I was alone but I made a decision to be alone. (check out my blog for more details) I exercised today, got a shower, put on make-up and nice clothes and I feel good. I am going to my BIL's house today for pork and sauerkraut later on and to spend time with the boys. I am going to be okay.

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


 Pounds lost: 3.1 
 
0
29.75
59.5
89.25
119
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
12/29/13 7:45 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I'm so sorry, Oona...

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
12/29/13 7:11 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
When I was a kid, we would watch the ball drop in NYC and then the next day (actual New Year's Day) we would have pork and sauerkraut. Kathy and I also did this. We sometimes would have people over but usually it was just us. This year, I may stay up, I may not. I don't know. I won't have anyone to kiss like I have for the past 23 years,, though.

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


 Pounds lost: 3.1 
 
0
29.75
59.5
89.25
119
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
12/28/13 8:03 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Happy New Year's OOna.. I am glad you are getting to spend some time with family. Are there any New Years Traditions you or your family holds to? We don't do anything except the resolutions. We don't have any specific foods or anything to eat the next day.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
12/28/13 1:56 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I have been exercising here and there. I spent the last 5 days at my sister's house and I did manage to get 2 walks in-with my sister, even with her complaining....LOL. Today, I used the Wii to get 31 mins of exercise in. I feel so much better, mentally and physically, when I exercise, I dont' know why I don't do it more often. I feel accomplished and like I am doing something for me.
I still miss Kathy and have been dreaming of her often. Some good, some bad. So, in turn, I have not been sleeping much. At my sisters, I was lucky to get 6 hours a night. Last night (or is it this morning?) I went to bed at 3am and got up at 7:30am. Something to talk to my shrink about, I guess.

Well, I'll try to be here before New Year's, but in case YOU aren't, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! emoticon

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


 Pounds lost: 3.1 
 
0
29.75
59.5
89.25
119
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
12/28/13 2:26 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
We've used both Wii Fit and Wii Fit plus. I can't start exercising again until I know what the doctor says about the anemia, but we have the Wii Fit U game ready to go when I know for sure I'm back to normal. I am retesting sometime in January.

I have not been doing well. My motivation has been gone. My natural inclination is to sleep. And while I'm not supposed to be exercising, I could be controlling my food portions which over the holidays are large and plentiful.

My make one, break one habits for DEC 25 through DEC31 are to get up at 7am, no naps.. and to eat only one portion of food per seating. (thus breaking my tendency to get seconds and to eat larger than normal portions)

My counselor came back from two weeks out of the office sick, to contact me just enough to say that the intern sounds like it would work better for me, and to go out of the office for another three weeks starting DEC 20. So now I need to contact the office supervisor to get me plugged into the intern since obviously my former counselor isn't going to have time to do it between when she got my message and when she was going out of office again.

One thing has improved and that is my mood. I quit, briefly, trying to do what I didn't feel like and let myself grieve, but I feel it is time for a new rally. And maybe it won't be so bad now that I know that beating up on yourself when you make a mistake or fail, is just another bad habit to overcome.

After tonight, I don't think I can make it, but my New Years Resolution this year is to read 4 books per month. That's roughly a book a week. How did I come up with this number? It was the number I thought I'd be satisfied with if I read in a month as the top to be expected. Realistically anything should be an improvement over last year however, and as long as I realize that I should be fine. Last year, I think after all the hemming and hawing, I only read 1 book, (not counting the audiobooks I listen to), so anything will be a satisfactory improvement in that regard.

Tonight I took notes on the book as people commented on the game being played and other things. Usually the guys sit in the living room at the TV and the chicks all sit in the kitchen and dining room discussing life. I got halfway through Chapter 3 after starting just after Chapter 1.

My first book is:
Making Good Habits, Breaking Bad Habits by Joyce Meyer
My second book is:
Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst (also an online Bible study through proverbs31.org)
(the free bible study goes from January 19 - March 1)

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
11/10/13 6:49 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
and I _finally_ have an appointment with my clinician again.. It is on Friday at 11am, so wish me luck. I'll have to take my calendar because she said before this is the meeting she wants to schedule out six months in advance. That will be sooo nice!

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
11/3/13 8:09 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I love CBT.. its the most effective therapy type for me. I'm not sure what my current therapist does. We haven't been working together for very long. She's been more helping me find a middle ground between my and my significant other's religious differences.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
HERMIEME's Photo HERMIEME Posts: 6,846
11/3/13 10:36 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Ani_LilAngel, now that you are doing some walking, are you recording your miles (iTreadmill or a pedometer) so you can get badges from SP. They gave me two of them after 25 and 50 miles and they're very motivating. Leslie Sansone videos on YouTube are great. The beginners is start walking, then it goes up to 1 mile and more when your're stronger and you can start collecting miles. I find it motivating. Maybe that's something you'd like to try as the weather gets colder? Emmy :))

HermiEme (Emmy) ᕙ(`▽)ᕗ

Head Girl Hufflepuff House
Winter Term 2013
Spring Term 2014

Determined Daisies - Fall 2013, Winter 2014
Turquoise Titans BL Winter Warmup
Violet Virtuosos - BLC 24
Orchid Oasis BTS - Spotted Tiger Orchid Hut
Leader of Montreal & QC Sparkers - The Official Team
Co-leader of Hong Kong People Sparkers

I will reach my goals.


12 Days until:  Personal 100 Day Challenge Ends
 
50
37
25
12
0
HERMIEME's Photo HERMIEME Posts: 6,846
11/3/13 10:26 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
InstraLousise, does your casemanager do CBT? I've had it 3 times and found it extremely helpful the first time, okay the second, and good this time too. Helps me get on schedule . Maybe it's something you don't need though. It's good at helping me deal with these "hot thoughts but I've missed two appointments because I'm addicted to exercise now and can't sleep. SP is very enticing.

HermiEme (Emmy) ᕙ(`▽)ᕗ

Head Girl Hufflepuff House
Winter Term 2013
Spring Term 2014

Determined Daisies - Fall 2013, Winter 2014
Turquoise Titans BL Winter Warmup
Violet Virtuosos - BLC 24
Orchid Oasis BTS - Spotted Tiger Orchid Hut
Leader of Montreal & QC Sparkers - The Official Team
Co-leader of Hong Kong People Sparkers

I will reach my goals.


12 Days until:  Personal 100 Day Challenge Ends
 
50
37
25
12
0
HERMIEME's Photo HERMIEME Posts: 6,846
11/3/13 10:20 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Yeah, now I'm having trouble with the other grocery store security tracking me cuz my card didn't work. The cashier was a sweetie pie but for some reason the manager came over. I went to the bank across the street and came back 4 minutes later and a man with a vest and club followed me around the store and stood there while I left. Sorry, it's hard for me to keep up with the threads Im on the 5% challenge and NaNoWriMo now, but I look a mess without fall clothes. limited incomes suck too. Dentists are the worst, whispering behind your back and then doing a half assed job on your teeth and telling you you need way more done than you need to cuz your're covered. One told me I had 9 cavities and then I got examined at the hospital and they told me I had none... Catching up...

HermiEme (Emmy) ᕙ(`▽)ᕗ

Head Girl Hufflepuff House
Winter Term 2013
Spring Term 2014

Determined Daisies - Fall 2013, Winter 2014
Turquoise Titans BL Winter Warmup
Violet Virtuosos - BLC 24
Orchid Oasis BTS - Spotted Tiger Orchid Hut
Leader of Montreal & QC Sparkers - The Official Team
Co-leader of Hong Kong People Sparkers

I will reach my goals.


12 Days until:  Personal 100 Day Challenge Ends
 
50
37
25
12
0
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
10/31/13 1:29 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Hey.. we all have our bad days and she just sounds like a crappy clerk to me. I had a similar thing happen with me when I had a disagreement about what my Risperdal dosage was.. they were upping it and I needed two strengths of pills and they only wanted to give me one of the pills (like close to half the dose I needed) I was really embarrassed and flustered about having to argue with them to get my medication.. I decided to collect myself and look at some of the other things in the store and a security guy started talking to the pharmacist.. "..just like the other addicts.." was what I heard. That chain had recently called the police and jailed cancer patients twice over prescriptions so I didn't think I heard wrong. I went to a different store for a while but now go to a different branch of the same chain as before, but this store is much, much better and the people are so friendly there, so I'm glad I went back and tried them again in the new city.

Still, it sucks having people treat you like that

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
HERMIEME's Photo HERMIEME Posts: 6,846
10/30/13 2:32 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Hi, I'm sorry I can't continue the thread right now but I'm in tears because I went to the grocery store the other day and I wasn't looking my best because I'd been up for several nights working on my book and it took me forever to choose what I wanted and when I got to the cash the butcher, who I guess is the owner said something in French, like did she steal something I guess and the girl at the cash said, in a snarky tone, "Elle est malade en deux sens du mot" (She's sick in both senses of the word). I was never going to go back there and swore I was going to write head office (this was a couple of weeks ago) but today I was in desperate need of coffee and it's less than a block away. The girl was sitting on the ledge by the cash reading a magazine. The checkout girl was nice and told me to take my time fishing for change but it turns out I forgot my bag and had to come back. The girl on the ledge looked up cuz I was laughing at myself with the cashier and I turned to her and said in French, I guess that's because I'm sick in both senses of the word, SONIA (because I took her name from the receipt because I wanted to get her fired. WELL, my voice came out so shaky she just gave me this sly snarky look like she was laughing at me. I was SO ANGRY walking home. I had gotten all dressed up to go to that store just in case she was there but my hair was still wet and I was wearing cream so my face looked oily. But I was so angry I started to make the coffee and then I knocked over a very expensive plate that was part of a snow-angel Hallmark collection and now I'm just in tears. Anyway, I'm going to go on The Secret Team site and try to get some positive energy back. Thanks for providing a team for me. Please go back to the previous thread, I'm going to be fine. If there was a way to sue the girl for publicly defaming the mentally ill I would, but I'm not sure that's possible or what she did. Anyway InstraLouise, my friend, sorry to interrupt. I'lll get back to your thread too.

HermiEme (Emmy) ᕙ(`▽)ᕗ

Head Girl Hufflepuff House
Winter Term 2013
Spring Term 2014

Determined Daisies - Fall 2013, Winter 2014
Turquoise Titans BL Winter Warmup
Violet Virtuosos - BLC 24
Orchid Oasis BTS - Spotted Tiger Orchid Hut
Leader of Montreal & QC Sparkers - The Official Team
Co-leader of Hong Kong People Sparkers

I will reach my goals.


12 Days until:  Personal 100 Day Challenge Ends
 
50
37
25
12
0
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
10/11/13 1:44 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Well, I'm back with the old casemanager now. She is the same one before that didn't really seem to be listening to me, but I must have gotten her on off days, tired, or sick, because now she seems to be totally interested and focused when I am with her, and she seems to have more energy too, so maybe I just wasn't getting her best before.

The reason why I was having trouble getting people to return my calls is that someone really dropped the ball on reassigning me to the new casemanager. They told my old casemanager that I was removed from her caseload, but then didn't finish assigning me to the new person, so when I left messages, no one thought I was part of their workload.

I did have the opportunity to go to a new intern and see someone more often, but I like some of the things that we've been working on, so I'm going to stick with the casemanager I have now.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
HERMIEME's Photo HERMIEME Posts: 6,846
10/6/13 11:35 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Hello Butterfly Friends. This is my first mental health check in and I am sorry to report that it is the first day since I joined this team that I have not been able to take all my medication in the day so I will not tick off the box on the goals that I took it once a day as prescribed, because for me it is prescribed three times a day, and I have run out of one of my my night time meds (Lamictal (Lamotrigine). I was so wiped from a goal of writing a book in 5 days for a contest and then six themed poems for a reading at a gallery a few days later that I let the refill slip my memory until 26 minutes before the pharmacy closed on a dark stormy night. I've already slept 5 hours today with 2mg of clonazepam but I get physical withdrawal symptoms (a terrible migraine) after a few hours without the meds I take I've been on them so long. I hope things are looking up with the increases in meds and that the caseworker is top-notch..

HermiEme (Emmy) ᕙ(`▽)ᕗ

Head Girl Hufflepuff House
Winter Term 2013
Spring Term 2014

Determined Daisies - Fall 2013, Winter 2014
Turquoise Titans BL Winter Warmup
Violet Virtuosos - BLC 24
Orchid Oasis BTS - Spotted Tiger Orchid Hut
Leader of Montreal & QC Sparkers - The Official Team
Co-leader of Hong Kong People Sparkers

I will reach my goals.


12 Days until:  Personal 100 Day Challenge Ends
 
50
37
25
12
0
ANI_LILANGEL's Photo ANI_LILANGEL Posts: 117
9/29/13 10:12 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Sorry I've been missing in action... Aug has been a very busy month. after the move and getting unpacked and all then made a trip back home and was gone a bit. so now Im trying to catch up on all the things I need to do here. Im also just feeling a bit like sleeping a lot... guess is is still a bit of jet lag. Well I hope I will catch up soon. I hate feeling like a slug.

On a nother note I found out from my Pdoc that I was suppose to increase my meds last month but was neglected to be told by my T who coordinated it all. And of course I did not read the bottle, I assumed that it was all the same. So now Im feeling the results of that increase.

Well I will try to get back in the swing of things here.

I hope you find out who your caseworker is soon that can be very unraveling. It is good though that you found someone to talk too.

I can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me!


 current weight: 200.0 
 
200
181.25
162.5
143.75
125
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
7/22/13 12:12 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Getting really worried. Still don't know who my casemanager is and my casemanager is the one that has to set up my arrangement with the intern. I will phone again tomorrow to see if I can find out who it is.

Fortunately a fellow SparkPerson who heard I was going to have a gap, told me that she's been studying to be a life coach and therapist and has her certificate for life coaching already, but has never had a client before, so she asked if I would mind if she practiced on me a bit, so we're talking together for free right now. At least I get to talk to SOMEONE about things.. Right now I'm working on basic hygiene, wearing makeup, and self care, reading the Bible, and working on the house. I kind of dropped exercise last week but that's still on my tracking calendar as is book reading, so I'm still hoping to do those as well. The tracking calendar available on SparkPeople's shop has room for 4 goals,and I'm tracking a 5th where the four meet in the center by placing a star there if I get my 10 minutes of housework done.

Edited by: ISTRALOUISE at: 7/22/2013 (00:16)
"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
7/6/13 5:08 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I think having something extra to do in the Partnership Accountability to the Finish Line group has really helped my mood. I've also started taking vitamins again, I notice more energy/less sluggishness following the evening when I take them. Unfortunately I've also been more than my share of spacey recently.

The latest episode happened yesterday:

Roger and I were both very hungry. We looked through the cupboard and decided on Tuna Helper Fettuccine Alfredo. We were at the end of our food for the month (today was our monthly grocery trip to Winco) but had bought various staples mid-month, like Milk. So I make the food.. we scoop it up and it looks perfect.. I thought it tasted a little bland so I put salt and pepper in it, knowing of course how chalk-full of sodium the whole thing was. Roger and I finished complimented each other on how good it was and how we were full.. and then I noticed in cleaning up, this large, paper and foil package on the counter.. I suddenly knew how guys feel when they finish putting something together and have miscellaneous unknown parts left over. In my haste to get everything melted and heated and in the saucepan I TOTALLY FORGOT to add the prepackaged seasoning. No wonder it tasted like it needed seasoning.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
6/17/13 12:53 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
from being slothful to falling into a mild depression for two weeks.. well that's been my journey this month..

I met with my med provider and we are watching things, but next time I go in it will be a new person, because my med provider is retiring. I really will miss her. She's really good and also very friendly.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
5/24/13 3:48 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
those are really good developments, angel!

I hope you keep them up!


I've slipped back into sleeping all day when I don't have things planned, but am hopeful, as I recover from the self-induced setback of quitting my babysitting job and losing a little income and something that gave me purpose, that I will rebound nicely. I have a lot of support and a planner!!!... and I'm not afraid to use it!!!!!!! lol.. Tomorrow I will try to get to the atm, the library and a grocery store, all on foot!

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
LIL-ANGEL-WINGS's Photo LIL-ANGEL-WINGS Posts: 492
5/17/13 8:35 A

Send Private Message
Reply
Doing better... I have started walking, again. This is day 2. 2.49 miles in 45 min. that's a 15 min mile.

Maybe I can do it just another day. And then another. I know my dog likes it. as do I when I'm all showered up.

I walk first thing in the morning before I have time to procrastinate. by 12:00 though I'm ready for a nap.

well one more day. I'm really gonna try.

Romans 8:38-39

John 3:16

I Cor. 13

Rev. 1:7 Look! He is coming with the clouds, and every eye will see Him, including those who pierced Him, And all the families of the earth will mourn over Him. This is certain! Amen!

lil-angel-wings.hubpages.com/

https://twitter.com/lil_angel_wings


 Pounds lost: 0.0 
 
0
17
34
51
68
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
5/12/13 9:14 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Well all the checks have cleared and I'm ready to refocus my energy from worrying about financial things to getting back to the weight loss and housekeeping. I've been sleeping really well the past few days and am ready to close my old account tomorrow. My voices are remarkably silent right now.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
5/5/13 9:30 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I've been doing really well yesterday and today. No extra sleeping, no naps.. no wasted time yesterday.. I've been kind of stressed today.. see the daily check-in, but otherwise am doing well.. I was having a lot of fun and feeling confident this morning. I have one or two little bumps and it throws me off my game.

Its so silly, because no matter what happens I'm going to have a better bank than the one I have now. And my anxiety is only going to last until tomorrow, then I'll know which bank I'm banking with.

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
4/30/13 3:54 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Oh Angel Wings..

((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))) I am sorry you feel so bad right now...
Please keep hanging in there and letting us know how you feel and how you are doing

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
LIL-ANGEL-WINGS's Photo LIL-ANGEL-WINGS Posts: 492
4/27/13 9:23 A

Send Private Message
Reply
I am so disgusted with my life... with me... every part of me... to day is a day when I wish it would just end. I feel like if I could just stay in bed for ever then everything would eventually be okay...
WHAT
EVER

Romans 8:38-39

John 3:16

I Cor. 13

Rev. 1:7 Look! He is coming with the clouds, and every eye will see Him, including those who pierced Him, And all the families of the earth will mourn over Him. This is certain! Amen!

lil-angel-wings.hubpages.com/

https://twitter.com/lil_angel_wings


 Pounds lost: 0.0 
 
0
17
34
51
68
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
4/23/13 3:14 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
All is quiet with the voices on my birthday!!!

I was feeling down and then I came on and I had a lot of SparkMail and Email and Facebook messages (I know I didn't say anything here, so people couldn't have known.. maybe that would make a good thread for here.. When is your birthday.. so we could all support each other on their special day.. let me know what you think of the idea..) It was overwhelming.. and then I got on myself for sleeping so long today.. but then I did my cardio routine and I feel loads better now!



"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,810
4/21/13 12:49 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Thanks, LiLAngelWings.. :)


Getting out and going for a walk and doing those simple things is a good sign. I know how incredibly hard it can be, but that you are able to make yourself speaks volumes and makes it more likely that you will continue to improve...

Sorry I didn't write back right away.. (((((((((((Hugs))))))))))

"Istra Starcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄🍤 🐛 🐝 🐜 🐞 🐌✫✶♡🐫
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


 December Minutes: 0
 
0
60
120
180
240
LIL-ANGEL-WINGS's Photo LIL-ANGEL-WINGS Posts: 492
4/20/13 3:57 A

Send Private Message
Reply
ISTRALOUISE Thank you for continuing to post even when we do not... you are an encouragement to me and I know to others to. Just wanted to say Thanks. emoticon

Romans 8:38-39

John 3:16

I Cor. 13

Rev. 1:7 Look! He is coming with the clouds, and every eye will see Him, including those who pierced Him, And all the families of the earth will mourn over Him. This is certain! Amen!

lil-angel-wings.hubpages.com/

https://twitter.com/lil_angel_wings


 Pounds lost: 0.0 
 
0
17
34
51
68
LIL-ANGEL-WINGS's Photo LIL-ANGEL-WINGS Posts: 492
4/18/13 10:28 A

Send Private Message
Reply
Last night was my first walk since last Aug. I am finally feeling like I can actually step out side and manage my anxiety. It is quite difficult but I'm so needing to do this. I'm back up again to where I started in 2009 at 200lbs. It is so sad and I am so miserable. I can not believe that I just had no self control and am still trying to find it.

I went out yesterday and bought a frig full of fresh fruit and veggies. Now I have no excuse to not eat healthy. If I do not eat it and I eat junk then I have just thrown $50.00 in the trash. So it gives me more motivation to eat right. I had to start some where. Oh ya, I actually went to the store alone, and not just one store but two. I'm so glad that God goes with me everywhere I am or I could not have done it.

Romans 8:38-39

John 3:16

I Cor. 13

Rev. 1:7 Look! He is coming with the clouds, and every eye will see Him, including those who pierced Him, And all the families of the earth will mourn over Him. This is certain! Amen!

lil-angel-wings.hubpages.com/

https://twitter.com/lil_angel_wings


 Pounds lost: 0.0 
 
0
17
34
51
68
Page: 1 of (4)   1 2 Next Page › Last Page »

Report Innappropriate Post

Other Butterfly People Mental Health Posts

Topics: Last Post:
Medications 7/4/2014 5:52:50 PM

Thread URL: http://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/team_messageboard_thread.asp?board=22232x21069x45719373

Review our Community Guidelines