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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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7/11/14 9:30 P

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Here's a wrist/forearm stretch which is good for those who spend a lot of time on the computer:
www.sparkpeople.com/resource/exercis
es
.asp?exercise=279


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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Posts: 7,789
7/11/14 10:23 A

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Here's a Spark article on chronic stress and how to reduce it:
www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellnes
s_
articles.asp?id=1687&page=6


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
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162.5
145
BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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Posts: 7,789
7/8/14 1:04 A

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Here's the link to an article about 14 things to do to organize and clean your home: www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellnes
s_
articles.asp?id=1998

Good ideas from fellow Sparkers!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
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162.5
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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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3/8/14 11:00 P

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I posted this on another thread, but thought it was appropriate here, too:

One of the ideas I got from my therapist at the last session was to put together an "emergency kit" for when feelings get overwhelming, or I'm struggling or just out of balance. It could have a list of things that make me feel better--what to read or listen to, phone numbers to call, movies to watch, reminders to take a walk, do some stretches, favorite quotes, a special candle, a teddy bear--anything and everything that can help me self-sooth and get back to a place where I can better deal. I really like the planning ahead, and having tools I can turn to when I'm feeling needy.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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2/1/14 8:32 P

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emoticon blog by our own Janice (A New Jan) about the French approach to eating. Quick and easy to read, with wonderful, life-affirming perspectives. I didn't even get to the second link, but highly recommend checking out the first one! www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=5608348


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
180
162.5
145
BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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12/23/13 10:56 P

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On another team, members were talking about holiday tasks they had completed, or still had to do, and I shared this:

I keep recommending to people that they only try to do what they can get done enjoyably, without stressing themselves out. You may not do everything each year, and can mix it up on where you'll spend your time, money and energy. We don't have to do it all. Because of finances, I cut way back on gifts this year, but I have my tree and sent cards with a letter, because I really like that part--and wearing the holiday jewelry and listening to music.

Wishing everyone a joyful next few days--whatever you do!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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12/17/13 10:45 P

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If you struggle with organization and clutter like I do, here's a great short article, 10 reasons to clear clutter--and it's all about the benefits, with no "shoulding": www.mindbodygreen.com/0-11619/10-rea
so
ns-to-stop-what-youre-doing-start-clR>earing-your-clutter.html


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
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GABBY308's Photo GABBY308 Posts: 7,936
6/12/13 9:01 A

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emoticon I heard that tapping is also good for pain and dieting. I watched some videos and did it for a couple of days but forgot all about it. Thanks for the reminder!






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ACTOUTLOUD's Photo ACTOUTLOUD SparkPoints: (1,933)
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6/11/13 5:38 P

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I'm not sure if this has been mentioned already (and if it has, I apologize), but I find something that helps me is EFT. My therapist uses it during our sessions and I find it has helped tremendously. Sometimes I feel bad after the sessions, but it's just due to dealing with the emotions, and it typically disappears the next day. Brad Yates has a series of videos on Youtube to tap along to. He's very positive and uses good affirmations and suggestions. Here's a link to his channel: http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiHZMZejDS
4RIxDdBwoie9A
My therapist also recommended Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway and The Assertiveness Workbook. I like the latter. It's helping me to learn how to stand up for myself and get rid of the feeling that what I say is not important.

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6/8/13 6:44 P

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Wonderful sharing, Gabby-- emoticon Chopra shares something similar--a study that showed the most important predictors of longevity were not physical--blood pressure, weight, diet or exercise--but emotional, like resilience. Our emotional & mental health are just as important as our physical health, as deserving of concern, nurturing and effort.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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GABBY308's Photo GABBY308 Posts: 7,936
6/7/13 8:51 A

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Four Steps to a Positive Outlook
Did you know that pessimism has been linked to a higher risk of dying before age 65? On the other hand, expressing a positive, optimistic attitude is associated with a variety of health benefits: lowered production of the stress hormone cortisol, better immune function, and reduced risk of chronic diseases. If you are stressed-out or anxious - which can be either a cause or an effect of a pessimistic outlook - try the following:
1. Take care of yourself by eating a healthy diet, exercising regularly and getting adequate sleep.
2. Express your emotional reactions honestly so you can effectively deal with what's bothering you.
3. Confide in someone - your mate, a good friend or a trusted relative.
4. View the cup as half full instead of half empty.

Improve Your Well-Being

Making simple, conscious decisions about your everyday life can improve your physical and mental well-being. Following through on the right health and lifestyle resolutions doesn't have to be difficult, especially if you have a firm idea of areas you want to improve, and remember that small, gradual steps typically have better results than all-or-nothing approaches
\From Andrew Weil MD






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LOBOSMOMMA's Photo LOBOSMOMMA Posts: 141
4/11/13 9:46 A

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I was recently given a phone number to call if you're a veteran. They can help with any kind of crisis and provide in person counseling if needed also. I know there's more they can help with, so if in doubt, and you're a veteran, call them.

VA Crisis Hotline: 1-800-273-8255

~*~ Betty ~*~

"If you truly want to change your life, you must first change your mind." - Anon


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3/4/13 12:22 A

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Fantastic blog on loving, not shaming, our bodies:
www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=5266193

There are some great quotes and graphics along with it.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
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162.5
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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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2/10/13 1:50 P

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This was my comment to a Spark Friend's blog which mentioned struggling with exercise:

I was struck by what you said about exercise--that it's hard for you to decide to do it, but once you do, you enjoy it & like the feeling of accomplishment. That could be an important key for you. Each morning before getting up, think about that internal experience of pride and happiness, of strength and accomplishment, and remind yourself you deserve to feel that today, and plan what you will do to make it happen. At night, savor the experience of accomplishing your goal and how it felt. Let yourself imagine doing it again tomorrow and how wonderful it will be.

You can do your planning & acknowledging at other times during the day as well. Compliment yourself often, plan little rewards for keeping your commitments to yourself, and share your successes with your 3Bs on our Success thread!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Here's her blog: www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=5243946


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
180
162.5
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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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1/26/13 8:18 P

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Here's a wonderful blog that ends with this line: "How do you handle Adversity? Are you a Carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean? "

www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=5223746


emoticon Gabby for posting a link in our daily chat thread!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
180
162.5
145
BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
Fitness Minutes: (74,717)
Posts: 7,789
11/18/12 10:08 P

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Here's a Spark article on 21 ways to cut down on T Day calories. You don't have to do them all, but lots of good ideas, and recipe links!

www.sparkpeople.com/resource/nutriti
on
_articles.asp?id=1238


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
180
162.5
145
BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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11/1/12 1:39 A

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I just read it and shared it on my other 2 teams. emoticon Gabby!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
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GABBY308's Photo GABBY308 Posts: 7,936
10/31/12 10:05 A

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here's a good article on diet and stress (and how to reduce it). I read Jon Gabriels book and it was very motivating.
www.hungryforchange.tv/article/visua
li
zation







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10/15/12 8:22 P

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The Chopra Center is starting a new 21-day meditation challenge on 11/5, Creating Abundance. I just registered. emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
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162.5
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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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10/7/12 12:01 P

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Here is an inspiring blog by a dear Spark Friend on the lessons she has learned over the last year, in which she successfully moved from the mid-300s into Two-ville:
www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=5065498


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
180
162.5
145
BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
Fitness Minutes: (74,717)
Posts: 7,789
9/20/12 10:17 A

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From our own Jineane in today's status:

JINLYNN Are the choices I make today helping me get closer to my goals or further away?

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
180
162.5
145
BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
Fitness Minutes: (74,717)
Posts: 7,789
7/15/12 5:44 P

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Here is an amazing blog by ~Indygirl:
www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=4967136


Hers is an amazing story. She's lost over 200 # so far and is disabled. She ends the blog (you may want to skim, it's very long) with an endorsement for taking it slow. It took her 2-3 years to lose the first 100 # and another 4-5 to lose the next 100, having plateaued for about a year after the first 100, as she reports.

This woman is the real deal, and author of many Most Popular Blogs, of which this is one.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
180
162.5
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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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6/4/12 11:12 P

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Ah, the gift of laughter! This sweet note came with an applause goodie, and made me smile:

Applause, applause, applause! Way to take charge of your weight loss and your improved health while inspiring everyone else! Enjoy your celebratory shopping. Many maintainence Blessings, Cyndy

Sorry about the spelling of maintainence, maybe when I get there I will learn how to spell it.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
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162.5
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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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5/24/12 10:35 A

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Love this:

PLAYBLUES22 "If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place.."

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
197.5
180
162.5
145
BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (86,880)
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Posts: 7,789
5/11/12 10:46 P

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emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
215
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GABBY308's Photo GABBY308 Posts: 7,936
5/9/12 1:22 P

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This was in my inbox this morning - good timing since I'm still struggling g=with getting back on track

Today's affirmations are in the areas of - "Motivation" from Jeff at Affirmware.com

* I feel empowered to move in the direction of my goals.

* I have unlimited energy, creativity and drive.

* I feel motivated and ready to take action.

* I am always guided to take right action.

* I am motivated to take the next step.

* I have a clear vision of what I want to accomplish.

* I deserve all good that life has to offer.

* My greatest good comes to me from my connection with Spirit.

* New opportunities are showing up daily.

* I feel alive, energetic and ready to take on the world.

* I can do it.








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4/25/12 11:41 P

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I like it-- emoticon I think I'll share it, too!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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4/25/12 10:54 A

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A friend sent this to me in an email - it is from one of those chain emails which I absolutely hate but this is good advice:

'Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice.'

1. Go to bed on time.
2. Get up on time so you can start the day unrushed.
3. Say No to projects that won't fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health.
4. Delegate tasks to capable others.
5. Simplify and unclutter your life.
6. Less is more. (Although one is often not enough, two are often too many.)
7. Allow extra time to do things and to get to places.
8. Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don't lump the hard things all together.
9. Take one day at a time.
10. Separate worries from concerns . If a situation is a concern, let go of the anxiety . If you can't do anything about a situation, forget it.
11. Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases.
12. Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc.
13. K..M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble.
14. Do something for the Kid in You everyday.
15. Carry a book with you to read while waiting in line.
16. Get enough rest.
17. Eat right.
18. Get organized so everything has its place.
19. Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life.
20.. Write down thoughts and inspirations.
21. Every day, find time to be alone.
22. Having problems? Talk to someone.. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don't wait until it's time to go to bed.
23. Make friends.
24. Laugh.
25. Laugh some more!
26 Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all.
27. Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can).
28. Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most).
29. Sit on your ego.
30 Talk less; listen more.
31. Slow down.
32. Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe.
33. Every night before bed, think of one thing you're grateful for that you've never been grateful for before. IT MAY HAVE A WAY OF TURNING THINGS AROUND FOR YOU.







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4/17/12 10:11 P

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I posted this on the affirmations thread also. I just think it's a powerful message for all of us, from our own beloved Wispy: Fear of any kind holds us back from doing practically anything that we really want to do. Love says move forward--grow, expand, open like a flower to the sun and the rain.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/11/12 10:29 A

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From my GG co-leader today:
MRS_EVA_K says: The road to success is always under construction.

I find this especially comforting today, given my current feelings of impatience and frustration. emoticon emoticon emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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3/29/12 10:31 A

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A great huddle from one of my 3Bs (Babystep Brigade Buddies): NPA4LOSS says: Wake up and Shine your Spark!
I have this great image of dusting and polishing a little flame of hope and perseverance to keep it strong and proud and shiny, so when we are feeling tired or overwhelmed & in need of a boost, we can find it easily, because it is shining so brightly! emoticon
Like it says in one of my favorite songs, Remembering and Forgetting, "The light that shines inside of us is brighter, brighter than the sun!"

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/19/12 10:23 A

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That's a great one; I haven't read it in a long time. It was one of the early ones on my path, as well as Shakti Gawain's Living in the Light.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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3/18/12 1:31 P

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A book that I've started reading which is helping me is "The Road Less Travelled" by M Scott Peck.

"Life is about process, not stasis. We are processes, not things. We constantly change, even when we resist, even when we think we are stuck...Stuckness is an illusion" ~ Jessica Macbeth


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3/17/12 12:51 A

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From a friend's status; here's the comment I wrote on her page:

I was going back through your feed and found this status comment: "I've gotten off track a few days. OOPSIE!" I love it! There is never a need to beat ourselves up when we don't meet our goals. Just acknowledge what we've done with an "Oopsie" or "My bad" and hop back on track!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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3/9/12 10:30 P

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PLAYBLUES22 If you make a mistake, be gentle on yourself and encourage yourself to learn from it, let go and move on.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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2/19/12 7:01 P

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Just a reminder for new members and veterans alike, please check Wispy's page. She has a series of blogs on building self-esteem that are great. If you can't afford a therapist right now, or in between sessions, do these activities and blossom into the you you are meant to be!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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POSITVEGRRRL's Photo POSITVEGRRRL Posts: 1,597
2/6/12 12:44 P

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Amanda,

Awesome one frame cartoon of inspiration! EVERYONE You Gotta Check It Out!

emoticon

Edited by: POSITVEGRRRL at: 2/6/2012 (12:45)
Towanda! Righter of Wrongs, Queen Beyond Compare!

Great works are performed not by strength, but by perserverance.
Samuel Jackson

Seek first to understand before you seek to be understood.
Unknown


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2/5/12 9:52 P

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A great visual blog from a Spark Friend on my BB & GG teams, on how our thinking affects our success and our experience:
www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=4723434


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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2/1/12 7:32 P

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I received this in my personal email. Written by Louis Hay

The thoughts we think, the words we speak, the beliefs we accept, shape our tomorrows. Every morning, stand in front of a mirror and affirm to yourself:

I am filled with unconditional love, and I express it today.
I am filled with joy, and I express it today.
I am filled with peace, and I express it today.
I am filled with infinite wisdom, and I practice it today.
This is the truth about me.

Now that is a powerful way to start your day! You can do it!


Towanda! Righter of Wrongs, Queen Beyond Compare!

Great works are performed not by strength, but by perserverance.
Samuel Jackson

Seek first to understand before you seek to be understood.
Unknown


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1/23/12 11:50 P

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Here's a great blog that one of my emoticon s commented on
www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=4699403#cR>omments

a great listing of habits and ways of thinking that lead to success!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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1/22/12 4:58 P

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Thanks Gabby, Looks good. I've got it saved in my Amazon account.

Towanda! Righter of Wrongs, Queen Beyond Compare!

Great works are performed not by strength, but by perserverance.
Samuel Jackson

Seek first to understand before you seek to be understood.
Unknown


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GABBY308's Photo GABBY308 Posts: 7,936
1/22/12 11:41 A

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Someone on another team said that she found these albums on meditations very helpful. She used them to help her work on her Heart chakra. They helped her to learn how to forgive herself and those who damaged her. She said that her heart is opening up again. If you are seeking help for anger, guilt and forgiveness she suggests that they might help you too.

They are also available on ITunes.

www.amazon.com/Turiya-Hanover/e/B001
LH
3ZNA







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1/19/12 1:57 A

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If you read the book, let me know what you think.

Thanks for the suggestions

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1/18/12 11:27 A

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@Shoegirl - thanks for the book referral. I'm so happy that you got out, for you and for the sake of your child. Children who witness domestic violence are also victims of that abuse. I hope that your son is getting counseling also. I still remember scenes of my father hitting my mother from when I was only 4 years old (I'm 60 now).


Here's something that was posted on my other team:

Never Be Ashamed
=============

"Never be ashamed of the scars that life has left you with.
A scar means the hurt is over, the wound is closed, you endured
the pain and God has healed you."
~Author Unknown~

Edited by: GABBY308 at: 1/18/2012 (11:28)





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1/15/12 10:24 P

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Thanks for sharing that resource. And emoticon on your progress--you are over halfway to your goal! emoticon emoticon

I just came across a saying so powerful, I had to share it with y'all:

From a new Spark Friend's page, one of the pictures in her gallery and on her page background is the image of the back of a woman with the quote
"Look in the mirror
Behold God"

Indescribably powerful! emoticon emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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SHOEGIRL38's Photo SHOEGIRL38 Posts: 20
1/15/12 12:09 P

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I'm in the midst of leaving an abusive marriage. It was so bad that he's getting a court martial because of it. This whole experience happened while here in Hawaii, his duty station. In the army everything happens fast. My son and I will be leaving within the next two weeks, no exact date. It's been hell for the past 3 years and I've put on weight because of this...emotional eating and anti-depressants have been a part of that. Happy to say that I have found a winning combination of anti-d's that aren't causing me to eat and making me feel much better.

A counselor at the family advocacy program here suggested a book, based on much of what I have been going through and I have to say that this is the most dead-on descriptive book about abuse-at least what I'm going through-that I just have to share....WHY DOES HE DO THAT? by Lundy Bancroft, I purchased kindle edition on amazon. He puts so much into perspective and can explain things in ways...It's just that good.

I'm new to this team and I really hope this helps!!


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1/13/12 12:05 A

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One of the best blogs I've read examining the lessons from losing momentum and focus over the holidays: www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=4676051

from our own Gabby308!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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12/31/11 10:09 P

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Here's a dynamite blog about looking back with perspective and forward with passion and determination. Very inspiring! www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=4646074#cR>omments


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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12/11/11 9:58 P

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I saw Ronnie's status in my Friend Feed, and wanted to share it:
PLAYBLUES22 Says...Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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12/11/11 11:30 A

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Here's a great blog on Keeping the Balance for the Holidays www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=4620508


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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12/4/11 8:42 P

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Here's another great blog by Ronnie, "Do Not Let Go of Hope":
www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=4612324


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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11/28/11 9:39 P

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Gabby, that's great. I'm totally intrigued, and plan to share with my other teams, especially the BBs!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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GABBY308's Photo GABBY308 Posts: 7,936
11/28/11 12:46 P

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Someone posted this on another team. It's a about setting a theme for the month and then mini goals in 3's - 3 per week, 3 per day. I especially thought Amanda might like it for organizing and baby steps :)

sourcesofinsight.com/monthly-plannin
g-
with-agile-results/?utm_source=feedbR>urner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=
Fe
ed%3A+SourcesOfInsight+%28Source
s+of+Insight%29
sourcesofinsight.com/monthly-plannin
g-
with-agile-results/?utm_source=feedbR>urner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=
Fe
ed%3A+SourcesOfInsight+%28Source
s+of+Insight%29







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POSITVEGRRRL's Photo POSITVEGRRRL Posts: 1,597
11/26/11 1:55 P

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I recently got out of a verbally abusive relationship. During the relationship I often felt confused and rejected. I am reading a wonderful book now that is clearing away the confusion, validating what I had been feeling, and will prepare me so that I will recognize this type of thing in the future.

THE VERBALLY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP, HOW TO RECOGNIZE IT AND HOW TO RESPOND. By Patricia Evans Copyrighted in 1992 and 1996

I bought it used off of Amazon. An amazing book!!

emoticon

Towanda! Righter of Wrongs, Queen Beyond Compare!

Great works are performed not by strength, but by perserverance.
Samuel Jackson

Seek first to understand before you seek to be understood.
Unknown


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11/24/11 9:54 A

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With the busy-ness of the holidays, wanted to share this relaxation meditation I just found. I enjoyed it very much:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoM57Z8dRUY&
NR
=1


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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11/19/11 10:38 P

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Here's a quote I really like, that I found on another team's Quotes thread:
“Keeping your body healthy is an expression of gratitude to the whole cosmos — the trees, the clouds, everything.”
― Thich Nhat Hanh, Touching Peace: Practicing the Art of Mindful Living


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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11/19/11 10:17 A

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I have numerous of these guided meditations saved into my favorites folder. Here's one I just found today that gives basic meditation technique, especially nice for beginners:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=1LVkxZUDTsQ&
fe
ature=related


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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11/7/11 8:47 A

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I've been trying out some of the guided meditations mentioned on another team, and have found some good ones (and some not so much) on You Tube. Perhaps my favorite ones are by Lilou Mace, who has a pleasnat--though soft (I turn up my volume for hers)--voice, and gentle manner. Here is a 10 minute one on manifesting. She also has a nice short one (3-4 minutes) on visualizing.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQLXTF7FT_c&
fe
ature=related


Edited by: BLESSEDBEING at: 11/7/2011 (08:48)
Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


 current weight: 145.0 
 
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GABBY308's Photo GABBY308 Posts: 7,936
11/3/11 12:55 P

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Thank you for sharing Kimberly - I'm glad that your faith gives you so much comfort.






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11/3/11 11:55 A

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I have learned several things that have helped me through my journey:


God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The Courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
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Love is all around us, and if our mother's cannot provide it, we must seek it elsewhere.
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Uncover the hurt. – Talk about it, don’t ignore it.
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Take care of yourself. – Don’t deny your anger; taking care of yourself is the cure for resentment.
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Cry. – Tears are cleansing. Your emotions have been frozen and now they are thawing.
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Idleness is the Devil's workshop. Learn a new hobby.
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This too shall pass.
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We don't know what the future holds, but we know who holds the future.
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A creek is like a Christian’s life – sometimes rough and turbulent, and sometimes tranquil, peaceful, and sheltered. We need to seek a tranquil, quiet spot every day to commune with God, to nourish our souls, to seek the strength that will make us fit for Christian living.
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An artist painted life as a sea, wild, swept by storms, covered with wrecks. In the midst of this troubled scene, he painted a great rock rising out of the waves. In the rock, above the reach of the billows, was a cleft with herbage growing and flowers blooming, and in the midst of the herbage and the flowers, a dove was sitting quietly on her nest. It is a picture of the Christian’s heritage of peace in tribulation……Thus Christ would have us live in the world – in the midst of the sorest trials and adversities, always victorious, always at peace. The secret of this victoriousness is faith—faith in the unchanging love of God, faith in the unfailing grace and help of Christ, faith in the immutable divine promises. If we but believe God and go forward ever resolute and unfaltering in duty, we shall always be more than conquerors.
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Happiness is the inner joy that can be sought or caught, but never taught or bought.
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Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
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You who no longer have a mother to love you,
And yet crave for love,
God will be as a mother.

You who have no brother to help you,
And have so much need of support,
God will be your brother.

You who have no friends to comfort you,
And stand so much in need of consolation,
God will be your friend.
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Father God, I come to You today in Jesus’ name. I give You everything that has hurt me. I give You every loss and the pain I have felt over each one. I give You injustice, every unfair situation, everything I don’t understand. I give You the people who have hurt me. I give You my past. I give it all to You, and let it go right now.

I ask for the comfort of the Holy Spirit to come into my life. Comfort me, oh God, the way only You can. Forgive me for running to people and getting angry at them because they could not make me feel better. You are the only One who can make me better.

I thank You, Lord, for healing. I ask that the grieving process take its proper course in me and You would show me when it is time to go on and how to do so. I pray for my joy to return and for my life to return. I commit to You to get up and go on. In Jesus’ name, amen.
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Breathing in, I know I am breathing in.
Breathing out, I know I am breathing out.
In/Out

Breathing in, I see myself as a flower.
Breathing out, I feel fresh.
Flower/Fresh

Breathing in, I see myself as a mountain.
Breathing out, I feel solid.
Mountain/Solid

Breathing in, I see myself as still water.
Breathing out, I reflect things as they are.
Water/Reflecting

Breathing in, I see myself as space.
Breathing out, I feel free.
Space/Free


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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10/14/11 11:41 P

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One of my co-leaders shared this on the team A Gathering of Goddesses, and I think this Self Blessing might be helpful to some of my SAssy sisters here:

"I forget where I first learned this, but I have used it a lot through the years. It is very healing and empowering. It is extremely powerful, although rather difficult for me, to do it while naked looking into a mirror and staring into your own eyes. I usually do it with my eyes closed in more of a meditative state.

I open it by saying: Goddess bless me, for I am your (child, daughter).

Then I start at the top of my head and work my way down, blessing different parts of me. It changes from time to time, but here is an example:

Goddess bless my head so that I may think clearly.
Goddess bless my eyes so that I may see your beauty all around me.
Goddess bless my mouth so that I may taste your goodness.
Goddess bless my throat so that I may speak truthfully and kindly.
Goddess bless my heart so that it may be filled with love.
Goddess bless bless my breasts as symbols of a woman's power to nurture.
Goddess bless my hands so that I may work at all that pleases me.
Goddess bless my belly, home to my womb, center of my power to create life.
Goddess bless my legs so I may walk in beauty.
Goddess bless my feet to carry me on my path.

Goddess bless me, for I am your (witch, priestess, daughter).

You can say whatever you want, this was just to show you how it could be done.

This can be turned into a very nice ritual by including a ritual bath before the blessing.

And it can be very healing if you choose parts of you that you don't like, and then ask the Goddess to bless them for all the positive reasons you can think of."

Someone else on our GG team thought it may have originated with Z Budapest, and they shared a link for a youtube video, which I shall try to share separately.


Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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7/8/11 1:23 A

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Amen, indeed! What a glorious concluding sentence--and illustration!! Thanks, Tia! emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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7/7/11 11:22 A

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Amen emoticon






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7/6/11 10:19 P

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Things that have helped me: An amazing therapist who has patiently allowed me to work through my issues at my own pace and who has never wavered in her support, a sense of humor (if you can find a way to laugh at it, you can live through it), crying, grieving, screaming, praying, spending time every day to do something that I love (even if I would rather spend the day bed), NOT spending more than an hour a day dwelling on or working through past issues, the Courage to Heal book and workbook, the Survivors of Incest Anonymous group, and never giving up hope that I will be healed and whole. Abuse sucks and healing is hard, but every tear I have shed is worth where I am today emoticon

Co-leader: Survivors of Abuse Team. teams.sparkpeople.com/SoA Co-leader: Parents of Teens Team. www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
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Wanna-be cheerleader: www.oldfatcheerleader.blogspot.com


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7/2/11 4:06 P

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This was posted on the meditation team that some of us belong to:


www.learningmeditation.com/siw.htm

Good for someone who wants free guided meditations. There are even a couple for self-esteem and weight loss.






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6/3/11 10:17 A

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Blessedbeing, I replied on your blog, but I wanted to reply here as well. Your blog post was wonderful and I really appreciate you sharing the link with us here. It is a great reminder to me to work on accepting all of myself, not just the parts of me that I like. I hope that you continue to share your revelations as they come up in your work so that we can benefit from all that you learn emoticon

Co-leader: Survivors of Abuse Team. teams.sparkpeople.com/SoA Co-leader: Parents of Teens Team. www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
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Wanna-be cheerleader: www.oldfatcheerleader.blogspot.com


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6/3/11 1:03 A

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I didn't know whether to create a discussion on this team or my Goddess team, since the Aha! stemmed from a Tarot reading. My compromise was to write a blog, the link for which is here:
www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal.asp?id=BLESSEDBEING


It deals with the work I'm doing now on my incest issues and how that fits into other work I'm doing. I hope it may be helpful to others.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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5/29/11 11:35 A

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Something that has helped me immensely is the Survivors of Incest Anonymous group. I am fortunate enough to have a local group to attend, but there are also online and phone meetings for people who do not have the same access. The group is based on a 12-step program and focuses on support and healing from the effects of childhood sexual abuse. While it works best in conjunction with therapy, it can be helpful for anyone.

Co-leader: Survivors of Abuse Team. teams.sparkpeople.com/SoA Co-leader: Parents of Teens Team. www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=22491fromSparkPeople.com.

Wanna-be cheerleader: www.oldfatcheerleader.blogspot.com


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5/28/11 2:36 P

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Thank you for that BlessedBeing...I agree that we don't have to "forgive" our abuser. I wasn't going to forgive my abuser, but someone else once told me that it's not forgiveness in the literal sense, but to "release" them in your mind so they no longer have power over your psyche.

Can you post also post those books under the book topic?






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Things that have helped me over the years:

Therapy with a therapist who is qualified to work with survivors of abuse. I did EMDR (Eye Movement Desentization something) that was very powerful.

A more recent therapist recommended the book Mindsight by Daniel J Siegel--excellent!

Work with affirmations--I adore Louise Hay's You Can Heal Your Life. Though I recommend you skip the chapter "What I Believe" at least in the beginning. You don't have to believe what she does to gain benefit from using the affirmations.

Listening to positve music with uplifting lyrics.

Not polluting your consciousness with violent or cruel imagery, words, and stories. For me that means no watching the news, crime shows, gangster movies.

Speaking your truth. I used to lose my voice regularly--I first got laryngitis at age 9, when the abuse escalated--but that stopped when I began to tell what happened and speak up for myself.

Don't let anyone tell you that you *must* forgive your abuser. When I gave myself permission to hate my father for the rest of my life, the pressure eased. Forgiveness is a choice you make for yourself, to free yourself from the limits of the past. You don't do it because it's nice or expected or it will prove how holy you are. It is also a process. You don't do it once and everything is OK. A history of abuse isn't something you just "get over" and anyone who tells you to do that is ignorant.

Face your pain and your demons, don't ignore the past, but don't stay stuck there. A SF on another team shared a comment about there being a good reason that the windshield on your car is bigger than the rearview mirror: it's more important to see where you're going than where you've been. You can't turn a blind eye to your past and pretend it didn't happen; if you don't learn the lessons, you may end up repeating them. But there comes a point when surviving isn't enough; we are meant to Thrive.

Meditation can also help. Real Happiness by Sharon Salzberg is short, easy, profound. She also has a great Lovingkindness meditation.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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5/28/11 11:14 A

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I copied this from another team that I'm on:

Marianne Williamson's latest book Course in Weight Loss (Hay House) details 21 spiritual lessons for surrendering your weight forever. Here's an insight into the author's approach, which supports moving away from the obsessive and compulsive habits of over eating towards conscious self care and worth.

1 Love the real you
There is the physical you (your body), that sees physical things in this material world (including food) and the spiritual you, the real you that cannot be defined as fat nor skinny as it has no material density. "The more you identify with the light of your being, the lighter you will feel," Williamson says.

.2 Commit to yourself
Williamson teaches that your relationship with food is a reflection of your relationship with yourself. Overeating is an act of self rejection, self betrayal and self punishment. If you learn a new way of thinking fuelled by a love and compassion for yourself, you will learn how to be there and stand up for yourself when the self-destructive urge to binge kicks in.

.3 Ritualise the change in you
This lesson requires you to identify a real person in your life who has a healthy relationship with food, a commitment to wellbeing or an ease with their body. Ask them to take part in a special ceremony that marks the beginning of your new relationship with food and wellbeing. They will be like a mentor of sorts for your weight loss journey.

.4 Exit the alone zone
"Overeating is not a food issue, it's a relationship issue," says Williamson. Your weight is like a wall you have built to further separate yourself from people you already feel separate from; it is a statement of your unavailability. There is no point trying to lose weight unless you have arrived at a place where you want to be closer to people.

.5 Be disciplined
As your mind realigns with its true spiritual self, your body will realign too and begin listening to its natural programs and hunger mechanisms. But beware. Your old Self will not go quietly. Now is the time to exercise discipline of loving thoughts and give credit to yourself for every single improvement you make in better choices and behaviours on your journey to true wellbeing.

.6 Honour the process
The weight loss journey is a process requiring spiritual mastery. "Learning to live with the common disappointments and failures of the human experience is part of your spiritual mastery," Williamson says. "Mastery does not mean you arrive at a place where nothing goes wrong; it means you are able to endure and transform what's wrong. It means you rise up more often than you sink in life."








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5/27/11 6:15 P

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I think that's great!

It's suprising how many people don't know how to breathe properly. I was taught to put a hand on my stomach and the other on my chest. When inhaling the hand on the stomach should move first and then the chest. Or lie flat and put a paperback on your stomach. When you inhale the book should rise and when you exhale it should go down. If your chest moves first you're breathing very shallow without the full capacity of your lungs.

Thanks for posting that! emoticon emoticon






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5/27/11 5:58 P

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One of the best things anyone ever told me was to BREATHE.

That is real helpful.

I was in yoga class the other week and we were working on breathing and the instructor suggested we breathe in to two long counts and out to either threee or four long counts ( depnding on what is comfortable for you) She said this calms the mind and body. I use it to go to sleep with and it works.

Just thought I would pass it on!

Licks and Hugs

-Judith- & Pickle the wonder dog

I can
I will

I AM!


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5/27/11 5:55 P

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Use this to post something you read, something that worked for you, something you learned in therapy or in school or from life - whatever. If it helped you or if you think it could help someone else, post it here.






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