I know y'all can't see it from a guy's point of view, so I'll try to provide you some male input.
Every female we've ever known, when she enters TTOM, has scratched and clawed - causing injury to our physical selves or of our emotional self. It's a product of conditioning for a guy to go somewhere with the other guys, or to his man-cave and hope the female of the species can't find him.
The first time he gets scratched and clawed is a shock - he doesn't know what to do (remember, girls got those classes like in the sixth grade). Guys are exposed to the CONCEPT in college, but that's as far as it goes. No instruction in the psychology of TTOM, no suggestions about how to cope.
The second time it happens, he is confused and starts to think. WTF? Is she telling me in a not-so-subtle way to get lost? But he tries out this relationship thing one more time.
The third time it happens - he's gone. He has absolutely NO idea what he did, and the lady involved never gives him a clue, so he decides to dump and run. He never even realizes it's a cyclic thing. Anything more than a week ago is "in the past", and his "past experience" focuses only on the times he felt ripped and abused.
IF the female comes to him, acting all hurt that he left, he thinks, "Who does this .... adjective .... think she is? How does she have the gall to tell me she really wants to get back together? I wouldn't subject myself to that kind of abuse for all the tea in China. She's WAY to high maintenance for me."
If he had encountered another male who attacked him just once like he felt he was attacked by his so-called "girlfriend", they would have immediately gone to Rumble City.
But they can't do that with girls. Smacking a female that attacks a guy is a social no-no and leads to charges of "domestic abuse". Jobs become difficult to come by if that's on his record. It may very well affect his ability to get credit. He'll never be able to buy a handgun and will probably be hasseld if he tries to buy a shotgun or hunting rifle (the phrase, "screwed, blued and tatoo'd" is what he experiences). The best thing to do (he thinks) is to start singing that old song, "These Boots are Made for Walking", and he walks.
Pavlovian training - Get out of town when she starts to turn into some kind of vampire.
My advice (I've been married to the same lady for 39 years)?
Before TTOM, set him down and explain what it does to you psychologically and mentally (he doesn't want to know about the physical stuff - believe me).
When TTOM comes about, the very first time you try to scratch his eyes out (actually or literally), tell him he's so good for understanding and that it might be better if y'all spend a little time apart.
The second month, most guys are willing to try a bit longer before they freak. So two days is a 100% improvement. Feed him some of his favorite candy.
The third month, with a whole lot more effort, he lasts three days. Pat him on the head, give him a piece of candy and buy him his favorite Sports magazine.
If the relationship is still going on after four months, and he goes through day four, tell him it's OK if he doesn't spend every minute with you. Send him out to play with "Da boys". If you think he might not be able to make it through month five, buy him a couple of tickets to a hockey game or a professional fight.
At five months, you're on the downhill side, hopefully. At the end of the day, comment that he is sooo sensitive; you've Never had a relationship as good. Reward him with a few kisses and hugs. BE VERY CAREFUL. At five days, his eyes are starting to glaze.
At six months (hey, this guy shows some promise), take him out to dinner. Don't worry if the food is healthy or not - men at this age rarely care. In fact, it's best to not take him any place where the waitstaff dresses all alike in black pants and white shirts, or where you have to choose between three or more wines (beer? the more choices the better). MEAT (meaning beef and the redder the better) and potatoes. He probably will take two bites of whatever vegetable, just to show you he "thinks" about being healthy.
If he gets through an entire week, sometimes by the seventh month, and you've decided he really doesn't meet your standards for some other reason, gently cut him loose. He's done an awesome job and so have you. His next girlfriend will appreciate your having trained him.
The sad part is, if he doesn't meet your standards, you have to start all over with training a new boyfriend.
However, if he Does meet your expectations, the next phase of his training will go much smoother.
It goes back to his childhood when "If Momma ain't happy, nobodies happy".