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CJBAGGINS's Photo CJBAGGINS Posts: 31,762
6/25/11 9:53 A

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Thank you for sharing your story to help this couple, Mike!

cj

What if we woke up tomorrow with only those things that we thanked God for today?


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ANGGEL40's Photo ANGGEL40 SparkPoints: (59,076)
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6/24/11 3:10 P

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Congrats Mike for making that change in your life and your family...and yes God is the answer..my hubby had to accept God as well as I did to keep our marriage and family strong...as married people we are all going to go through things...but if you love one another, things can be worked out..we are not in no way perfect...

Come near to God and He will come near to you- James 4:8


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STRIKE_NOIR_23's Photo STRIKE_NOIR_23 SparkPoints: (995)
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6/24/11 9:27 A

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Hello,

I have been your husband. I am right now doing everything I can to prove to my wife that I can be the her husband she deserves. I have cheated on her, I moved out on her, I told her that I wanted a seperation and I was living with a younger woman. I have disrespected her, used her, lied to her.

I really hope you the best but you have to realize that you are just as important a person as he is. It took me going to jail and having my wife one foot out the door to change enough to allow God to come into my life and help me change the person that I was to begin being the person my wife needed me to be. I am speaking from experience that for him to treat you the way you deserve he needs to be the one to change, he has no reason being her friend...it's not right and actually unhealthy. As much as it hurts and as much as he might be the love of your life, you can't sell yourself short.

Talk to family and friends and ask them for their honest opinion. See if he'll go to therapy or counseling. But I really do believe that if he loves you and respects you he should not be friends with that woman. I invite you to my homepage and my blogs, you'll see that I was where your husband was. It is not right of him.

I wish you the best
Mike

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SAMODER's Photo SAMODER Posts: 11,838
6/21/11 10:32 A

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I too wish you well. I do think that getting professional help so that the 2 of you can talk things out would be helpful. Many of the mental health clinics have sliding scales, if that is an issue.

Remember you have to do what is best for you!

Sam

You don't stop laughing. because you grow old, you grow old. because you stop laughing!


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MSTIGGERFAN's Photo MSTIGGERFAN SparkPoints: (59,064)
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6/20/11 10:40 P

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I am not for sure what to say either. I pray all goes well for you and you find the answers you need. Good luck to you.

Cherly
I can do all things through Christ who strenghtens me Philippians 4:13



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ANGGEL40's Photo ANGGEL40 SparkPoints: (59,076)
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6/20/11 10:08 P

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Hi and I am sorry that you are going through this...when things start going bad for me ..I always pray and ask God to guide me..this is something you will have to deal with alone with your hubby..if he loves you like he says, then there shouldn't be any problems letting the other lady go out of his life..remember when all else fails look to God..Wish you nothing but the best..God Bless!

Come near to God and He will come near to you- James 4:8


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CJBAGGINS's Photo CJBAGGINS Posts: 31,762
6/20/11 8:08 P

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Hello.

I'm so sorry that you are dealing with such a complicated situation!

I don't feel like I can offer any good advice, as I'm certainly not a professional or anything. I would suggest that you first ask some close family members or friends for suggestions as they know you best. Then, perhaps you can find a counsellor in your area (at a clinic, or by asking your family doctor for a referral).

This does seem like an involved situation, and it might be useful to get some help with it.

I would suggest, though, that you mention to your husband what it is you want - and tell him what it is you expect. If he says he wants to be with you, then perhaps he needs to show that with his actions (by not seeing her as well).

All the best to you!
cj


Edited by: CJBAGGINS at: 6/20/2011 (21:29)
What if we woke up tomorrow with only those things that we thanked God for today?


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AHARTZ0406's Photo AHARTZ0406 Posts: 62
6/20/11 3:23 P

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good morning here's my problem last month about the 20thish my husband told me he wanted to split and he wanted to "see" other people. so we split i had to move to Washington in marchish because my dad is dying and he staid in Arizona until we could move out of our place and he could close his shop. then he was going to move to Washington and go back to school and make our lives better. well that didn't happen when we split he found someone else and fell with her. so now I'm fighting for my marriage doing everything i can think of to save it. i moved back to AZ and we have been living in the same place well on the 6th her husband came back into the picture and she chose to go back to him and just left my dh i new she would. then her husband and my husband started fighting because my dh thinks she needs someone that will treat her better and this guy is a loser so i don't know. but he said he thinks the reason he fell for her so fast was because she is a lot like me.

they stopped talking for about 2 weeks and we (dh and i) were getting along great well i guess she messaged him and now they are friends, he said i cant ask him not to be friends with her its not just fair and its wrong i guess i can ask him not to do anything with her that's fine to ask but not just not be friends with her. so really i don't know what to do. i love him more than anything but i know her type her and her dh are not really together anymore so now she is back in our picture.

that should i do please help . she came to his shop the other night and was talking to him trying to spray him with glitter because she new i would see it and get mad she wants us to fight and break up.

he says he loves both of us but wants to be with me so i dont know



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