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5/7/11 2:53 P

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Shampoo Warning:


I figured out why I have been gaining weight. The shampoo I use in the shower that runs down my body says…“for more volume & extra body".

So now, I am going to switch to Dawn dish washing liquid.

It says..."dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove".

......So glad I figured this all out!



“There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when it's convenient. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses; only results.”

When you get to a plateau, think of it as a landing on the stairway to your goal. And maintenance is a lifelong plateau, so a bit of "rehearsal" for maintenance isn't the worst thing in the world

pacific time


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L*I*T*A*'s Photo L*I*T*A* SparkPoints: (358,712)
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3/29/11 10:21 P

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Now, don't cheat and look at the answers at the bottom of the email.



A TEST FOR OLD KIDS

I was picky who I sent this to. It had to be those who might actually remember. So have some fun my sharp-witted friends. This is a test for us 'old kids'! The answers are printed below, but don't cheat.

01. After the Lone Ranger saved the day and rode off into the sunset, the grateful citizens would ask, Who was that masked man?
Invariably, someone would answer, I don't know, but he left this behind. What did he leave behind?________________.

02. When the Beatles first came to the U.S. in early 1964, we all watched them on The _______________ Show.

03 'Get your kicks, __________________.'

04. 'The story you are about to see is true. The names have been changed to ___________________.'

05. 'In the jungle, the mighty jungle, _______________.'

06. After the Twist, The Mashed Potato, and the Watusi, we 'danced' under a stick that was lowered as low as we could go in a dance called the '_____________.'

07. Nestle's makes the very best . . . . _______________.'

08. Satchmo was America 's 'Ambassador of Goodwill.' Our parents shared this great jazz trumpet player with us. His name was _________________.

09. What takes a licking and keeps on ticking? _______________.

10. Red Skeleton's hobo character was named __________________ and Red always ended his television show by saying, 'Good Night, and '________ ________.. '

11. Some Americans who protested the Vietnam War did so by burning their______________.

12. The cute little car with the engine in the back and the trunk in the front was called the VW. What other names did it go by?
____________ & _______________.

13. In 1971, singer Don MacLean sang a song about, 'the day the music died.' This was a tribute to ____________.

14. We can remember the first satellite placed into orbit. The Russians did it. It was called ___________________.

15. One of the big fads of the late 50's and 60's was a large plastic ring that we twirled around our waist. It was called the ________________.





ANSWERS :
01. The Lone Ranger left behind a silver bullet.
02. The Ed Sullivan Show
03. On Route 66
04. To protect the innocent.
05. The Lion Sleeps Tonight
06. The limbo
07. Chocolate
08. Louis Armstrong
09. The Timex watch
10. Freddy, The Freeloader and 'Good Night and God Bless.'
11. Draft cards (Bras were also burned. Not flags, as some have guessed) 12. Beetle or Bug 13. Buddy Holly 14. Sputnik 15. Hula-hoop

Send this to your 'old' friends, better known as Seniors. It will drive them crazy! And keep them busy and let them forget their aches and pains for a few minutes.










“There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when it's convenient. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses; only results.”

When you get to a plateau, think of it as a landing on the stairway to your goal. And maintenance is a lifelong plateau, so a bit of "rehearsal" for maintenance isn't the worst thing in the world

pacific time


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L*I*T*A*'s Photo L*I*T*A* SparkPoints: (358,712)
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2/12/11 9:09 P

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Don't mess with Seniors;

they will win any battle of the wits!



A retired Irish priest was transferred to Texas. Father O'Malley rose from his bed one morning. It was a fine spring day in his new Texas mission parish. He walked to the window of his bedroom to get a deep breath of the beautiful day outside.

He then noticed there was a jackass lying dead in the middle of his front lawn. He promptly called the local police station......

The conversation went like this: ''Good morning. This is Sergeant Jones. How might I help you?''

''And the best of the day te yerself. This is Father O'Malley at St. Ann 's Catholic Church. There's a jackass lying dead in me front lawn.

Sergeant Jones, considering himself to be quite a wit, replied with a smirk, ''Well now Father, it was always my impression that you people took care of the last rites!''

There was dead silence on the line for a long moment....................................
.........

Father O'Malley then replied: ''Aye, 'tis certainly true; but we are also obliged to notify the next of kin.''





“There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when it's convenient. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses; only results.”

When you get to a plateau, think of it as a landing on the stairway to your goal. And maintenance is a lifelong plateau, so a bit of "rehearsal" for maintenance isn't the worst thing in the world

pacific time


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DEBBIE_J's Photo DEBBIE_J Posts: 966
11/18/10 11:48 A

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L*I*T*A*'s Photo L*I*T*A* SparkPoints: (358,712)
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11/16/10 8:15 A

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Turkey Survival

When I was a young turkey, new to the coop, My big brother Mike took me out on the stoop,

Then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow, And he told me there was something that I had to know;

His look and his tone I will always remember, When he told me of the horrors of ..... Black November;

"Come about August, now listen to me, Each day you'll be thick, where once you were thin, And you'll grow a big rubbery thing under your chin.

"And then one morning, when you're warm in your bed, In'll burst the farmer's wife, and hack off your head;

"Then she'll pluck out all your feathers so you're bald'n pink, And scoop out all your insides and leave ya lyin' in the sink,

"And then comes the worst part" he said not bluffing, "She'll spread your cheeks and pack your rear with stuffing".

Well, the rest of his words were too grim to repeat, I sat on the stoop like a winged piece of meat,

And decided on the spot that to avoid being cooked, I'd have to lay low and remain overlooked;

I began a new diet of nuts and granola, High-roughage salads, juice and diet cola,

And as they ate pastries, chocolates and crepes, I stayed in my room doing Jane Fonda tapes,

I maintained my weight of two pounds and a half, And tried not to notice when the bigger birds laughed;

But 'twas I who was laughing, under my breath, As they chomped and they chewed, ever closer to death;

And sure enough when Black November rolled around, I was the last turkey left in the entire compound;

So now I'm a pet in the farmer's wife's lap; I haven't a worry, so I eat and I nap,

She held me today, while sewing and humming, And smiled at me and said "Christmas is coming........"



“There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when it's convenient. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses; only results.”

When you get to a plateau, think of it as a landing on the stairway to your goal. And maintenance is a lifelong plateau, so a bit of "rehearsal" for maintenance isn't the worst thing in the world

pacific time


 October Minutes: 3,560
 
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L*I*T*A*'s Photo L*I*T*A* SparkPoints: (358,712)
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Posts: 180,151
8/16/10 7:57 A

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World's Shortest Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl said: 'NO!' And the girl lived happily ever-after and went shopping, dancing, camping, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, did whatever the hell she wanted, never argued, didn't get fat, traveled more, had many lovers, didn't save money, and had all the hot water to herself. She went to the theatre, never watched sports, never wore friggin' lacy lingerie that went up her ass, had high self esteem, never cried or yelled, felt and looked fabulous in sweat pants and was pleasant all the time.

The End



“There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when it's convenient. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses; only results.”

When you get to a plateau, think of it as a landing on the stairway to your goal. And maintenance is a lifelong plateau, so a bit of "rehearsal" for maintenance isn't the worst thing in the world

pacific time


 October Minutes: 3,560
 
0
943.75
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2831.25
3775
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