Very honest answers, Lisa. I know they're hard to admit to. I feel the same way myself. But like you, I feel it's important to be honest with each other--and ourselves.
Here's my own painful, embarrassing answers. I've put these off for a few days. Denial, I suppose.
*deep breath* Here goes!:
1. What unwanted behaviors do you have?
I eat junk food in secret. I also hide food (candies, cookies, etc.) so it's harder for my family to know that I'm not eating right. I don't make myself exercise as I know I should. I shy away from people and events at times so that no one sees how big I've become. I take afternoon naps because I'm so tired all of the time. I have very low self esteem and feel guilty all of the time. I feel hopeless, despairing and helpless when I am off my meal and exercise plan.
2. What symptoms do you have? Obesity Sleep Apnea Shortness of breath Depression pinched nerves in my legs from my excessive weight inability to walk for any but the shortest distances.
3. What are the consequences of those behaviors and symptoms? Obesity--- plus all the negative health-related issues that goes along with being this fat. Depression. I don't participate in many family events because of my weight. Guilt. I don't accompany my husband or children to places of interest because I can't walk very far or long. I am always tired and find it very hard just to walk around my own house from room to room.
4. What other people are affected by your problem? How are they affected? My husband because he no longer has an active life partner but instead a practically housebound woman he must care for. my children and grandchildren because I can't do much of anything with them unless it's from a seated position--and almost always in my home, or theirs. I don't go "out" with them much anymore. My friends because I hardly ever call or visit them anymore as I don't want anyone to see me the way I am now.
OUCH. ouch. ouch.
That was rough. But necessary.
Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time. ~Mark Twain~
The difference between try and triumph is just a little umph! ~Marvin Phillips~
I think my favorite statement in this episode is 21st century weight loss is about inner alignment because when you are aligned internally the Universe bows to your intent.
Here are my answers to the questions.
1. What unwanted behaviors do you have? I eat unhealthy foods. I eat until I am sick. I eat when I am bored. Instead of planning my meals, I wait until I'm hungry to decide what to eat. I am lazy when it comes to exercise. I vegetate in front of the TV too much; in fact, I just watch TV too much period. I procrastinate, and then when I am up against a deadline I just give up.
2. What symptoms do you have? I am about 80 pounds overweight. I feel tired and sluggish all the time. My back and joints hurt and ache. I get breathless from just a little activity. I am not flexible, I can't sit cross-legged in the floor anymore, and I can't get up easily from the floor. I snore. I don't like the way I look and the clothes I buy to hide my body. I have high cholesterol and blood pressure, and the high blood pressure aggravates my irregular heartbeat.
3. What are the consequences of those behaviors and symptoms? I don't feel good. I don't have the energy I need to do everything I want to do, including writing, stitching, and drawing. I don't feel self-confident, so I'm uncomfortable around people. I sabatouge myself all the time because I feel unworthy of the effort it takes to change.
4. What other people are affected by your problem? How are they affected? My husband, because I am grumpy and unlovable, so I shy away from intimacy, both physical and emotional. My work and my art, because I don't have the energy to devote to excelling at each one. My dogs, because they deserve to be more active and go on walks every day.
I must confess, I was a little surprised at some of the answers that came in to my mind. I didn't like them, and I started to not post them. But you guys are my team, so I wanted to be honest with you, and that made me be honest with myself.
I'm looking forward to seeing your answers.
Lisa, Pelahatchie MS Central Time Zone
I am in charge of my choices, and I choose what is healthy, empowering, peaceful, and joyful.
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