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NANCYRUBIO's Photo NANCYRUBIO Posts: 318,417
5/25/11 5:57 P

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I have been like you all my life and have missed out on so much. Please break the chain and step forward into the spotlight. Do it for both of us, please.

Depression is the impression left by fear. Be willing to fight the fear. Conquer it with love.

Nancy Rubio
Oro Valley, AZ

 Pounds lost: 42.0 
GRNDMOM43's Photo GRNDMOM43 Posts: 47,152
5/25/11 10:38 A

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I must say at 62 this is something I wish I could do. My PTSD keeps me from being comfortable in the position of being held so that is an added issue. Can you have your boyfriend teach you at home? It may be an ego booster for him and you can be in a comfortable situation with someone you trust. SAVANNAHZMOMMA1 has some great ideas. I hope you can work on this and not be regretting at 62.


Kansas~ CST
Each step taken is a calorie left behind!

Don't quit! Tomorrow is another day to Sparkle.

 Pounds lost: 4.0 
5/24/11 10:47 P

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Things to remember:
- people aren't really watching you nearly as much as you'd feel
- and that the consequences of them thinking you are HORRIBLE at dancing is... nil. Completely nil.
- that any mistakes you make will make the other shy and anxious soul in the room feel like they are not alone. You are providing a service!

This is the thing I tell myself at step class and whatnot, because I'm also too shy to "dance", but I've been just making myself. Just smile, smile, smile and screw up and keep smiling your face off. It works so well... over before you know it and then you realize it was fun.

Think that's doable? Like you said-- you don't want regrets! Good luck!


Races Goal:
Sub 8:30/mile for a Springtime Race!
Volunteer at a race before June 2012!

Goal Winter & Spring 2012:
Develop an interesting cross-training routine that will be fun for my daughter to join in on.
10,000 steps/day whether running or walking.
Launch my SLEEP project!

 December Minutes: 0
Fitness Minutes: (27,176)
Posts: 416
5/24/11 8:32 P

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I have always wished I knew how to dance. Or at least had the "guts" to learn. Now that I have a partner he really wishes I could too. It would be something fun and cheap for us to do together. Plus, I know it can be great exercise.

BUT, since I have mostly social anxiety (not officially diagnosed, but symptoms fit and GP has had me on Cipralex for a few years), I can't move beyond feeling too silly and embarrassed to learn! One big issue I have is that I don't like to do anything new in front of people. I don't want them to know it is something new to me. I don't even like them to COMPLIMENT me on my progress in learning something new because that only puts the focus on the fact that I didn't know how to do it before. I can't even dance when I'm all alone because I feel silly!!! I do exercise tapes if they aren't too "dancy", but hate if anyone sees me doing it.

I know that I have lived a sheltered life (due to the combination of over-protective mother and my anxiety) so I feel like such an idiot because there are SO many things I don't know how to do that people much younger than me can do with ease. I have made great progress since moving out of my mom's house and in with my boyfriend 5 years ago. But, I am getting sick of still being so stuck!!! My GP is fabulous and is practically like a therapist since she's so open and helpful, and I do see a really nice and helpful clinical social worker, but they can only help so much. I've been referred to psychiatrists several times but never get a call back.

I feel like my fear of unknown things/embarrassment about learning them is holding me back in endless ways every day of my life. I don't want to die with tons of regrets and am scared it may come to that if I can't find the right help because I've already stayed stuck for years - so who says I won't just keep staying stuck for another 50 years!!!! 27 years of this is too much. 1 year, 1 month, 1 day, 1 SECOND is too much.

Ok, that was a bit of a rant. Now, I just want to ask if anyone has any tips about learning new things, dancing in particular.

“People do not change because they know facts. It’s taking knowledge from the brain but feeling it in the heart. Then people are motivated to change their lives.” - Dr. Oz

"All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking." - Nietzsche

"At some point you've just got to suck it up and keep going because it's only an hour. You're going to be done soon enough." - Bob Harper

"It's not about what you want anymore, it's about what you need to have." - Bob Harper

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