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TOPIC:   Clean and Funny Jokes and videos 


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TERRMOR
TERRMOR's Photo Posts: 5,074
5/2/09 12:49 A

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OMG THat is so funny. This is a keeper.
Terri

Bamamom of 3

I lost 27 so far on WW



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BEVPRESLEY
BEVPRESLEY's Photo SparkPoints: (126,685)
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5/1/09 8:55 P

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Here is one my dad sent me:

After being married for 50 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, "fifty years ago we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 25-year-old girl".

Now I have a $1,500,000.00 home, a $45,000.00 car, nice big bed and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 70-year-old woman. It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things.'

My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 25-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV.

Aren't older women great? They really know how to solve your mid-life crises.

beverly

One Day at a Time:
1) 10,000 steps daily
2) fruit & vegie at every meal
3) aerobic or strength train every day
4) 7 hours sleep daily
5) check in with SP daily

___Mar 2014 goals:
1) lose 4 pounds
2) ride 200 miles
3) clean/organize one room and closet weekly
4) complete 1 UFO

_______

It's never too late to be what you might have been.

George Eliot


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VHASKEW36
VHASKEW36's Photo SparkPoints: (70,216)
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5/1/09 8:41 P

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Here's a good blonde joke, they always make me laugh.

Enjoy

BLONDE GOING TO HOUSTON

THE PLANE IS ON ITS WAY TO HOUSTON WHEN A BLONDE IN ECONOMY CLASS GETS UP AND MOVES TO THE FIRST CLASS SECTION AND SITS DOWN.

THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT WATCHES HER DO THIS AND ASKS TO SEE HER TICKET. SHE THEN TELLS THE BLONDE THAT SHE PAID FOR ECONOMY CLASS AND THAT SHE WILL HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK.

THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO HOUSTON, AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."

THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT GOES INTO THE COCKPIT AND TELLS THE PILOT AND THE CO-PILOT THAT THERE IS A BLONDE SITTING IN FIRST CLASS THAT BELONGS IN ECONOMY AND WON'T MOVE BACK TO HER SEAT.

THE CO-PILOT GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND TRIES TO EXPLAIN THAT BECAUSE SHE ONLY PAID FOR ECONOMY, SHE WILL HAVE TO RETURN TO HER SEAT.

THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLONDE, I'M
BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO HOUSTON, AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."

THE CO-PILOT TELLS THE PILOT THAT HE PROBABLY
SHOULD HAVE THE POLICE WAITING TO ARREST THIS BLONDE WOMAN WHEN THEY LAND, SINCE SHE WON'T LISTEN TO REASON.

THE PILOT SAYS, "YOU SAY SHE IS A BLONDE? I'LL
HANDLE THIS. I'M MARRIED TO A BLONDE. I SPEAK
BLONDE."

HE GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND WHISPERS IN HER EAR, AND SHE SAYS, "OH, I'M SORRY." SHE GETS UP AND GOES BACK TO HER SEAT IN ECONOMY.

THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT AND CO-PILOT ARE AMAZED AND ASKED HIM WHAT HE SAID TO MAKE HER MOVE WITHOUT ANY FUSS.

I TOLD HER, "FIRST CLASS WASN'T GOING TO HOUSTON."


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