Author: Sorting Last Post on Top ↓ Message:
KJEANNE's Photo KJEANNE SparkPoints: (39,576)
Fitness Minutes: (31,713)
Posts: 2,093
8/5/13 9:55 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I know the wedding is over but I want to answer your question: don't you get tired talking about being gf? I was diagnosed 30 years ago! There were only a handful of gf foods then and they all tasted awful. I traveled 75% of the time for business so I had to eat out for all of my meals. I just developed a routine set of questions that I always asked. 30 years ago, no one knew what I was talking about. There were many times I had to send back a plate of food.

Now when I go to any event I call ahead of the kitchen and let them know I am gf. I arrive early to the event and introduce myself to the head waiter and let them know I am gf. We discuss my menu and come to agreement. Everyone is happy.

I DO sometimes get tired of asking lots of questions about the food I order but it's much better today. So many restaurants indicate gf and vegan and vegetarian foods on their menus. Progress in this area had been wonderful.

Do not look where you fell, but where you slipped.
African proverb


 current weight: 174.0 
 
220
202.5
185
167.5
150
KKENT4950's Photo KKENT4950 SparkPoints: (2,043)
Fitness Minutes: (2,845)
Posts: 65
3/26/13 8:27 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I've been gluten free (celiac) for seven years. I found out my second year of college. Tack on casein (milk protein) intolerance, a severe soy allergy (carry an epi pen) and minors allergies to coconut and buckwheat - eating can be pretty annoying, but at this point I'm used to it.

The one thing you have to remember is that this is your friend's day, not yours. If she is your friend she will understand your situation. Explain to her that you would like to go and enjoy her wedding but you will need something to eat. Ask for the reception/caterers number's. Gluten free is much more widely known, and is not as tricky at serving someone like me who can not have multiple things, they may be able to make you something. If you call and they can not accommodate you, or you feel nervous after talking to them, ask them if it is possible for you to bring your own meal and for them to plate it for you. I did this and made the made the call myself (the reception hall had it's own caters), I didn't hassle my friend (the bride) with having to explain this to them, or try to find a solution for me. Just ask her for the numbers and tell her you will take care of it.

I can understand the money part. I spent a good chuck of money to be in her wedding and I didn't get a meal out of it either, but that is not what going to a wedding is about. I ate the salad I brought, and was happy to have eaten a safe meal so that I could enjoy the rest of the night. When I get married there will be plenty of food at my wedding for me to eat!

It can be frustrating to have to explain your situation. But it is what it is. People get dealt a lot worse hand than being a Celiac. Because of my food allergies I rarely eat out. Sure, it sucks, and when I do it can be nerve-wracking. I can tell you that having celiac's now is a lot easier in terms of options that it was even 7 years ago, when few places even understood what "gluten" was, much less how to safely make a meal, or even have gluten free options. Supermarkets now have many more items as well, so try to focus on the positives.

And if you are ever somewhere where they have no gluten free dressing? (try finding gluten/dairy and soy free!!) ask for plain olive oil, and season with salt and pepper. That is what I usually use. They also sell the single serve salad dressing packets (can get off of amazon). Try carrying one in your purse or car. That way if you end up with a salad you can have some dressing that you like.


Every passing minute is a another chance to turn it all around.


 current weight: 127.8 
 
136
131
126
121
116
GOLDILOX8 SparkPoints: (1,770)
Fitness Minutes: (2,967)
Posts: 25
3/26/13 7:22 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Well the shower was Sunday. The bride was first in line at the buffet. She was sitting right next to me and she returned to the table before I even attempted to get in line. She looked at me and said "Oh you probably can't eat anything but the salad because of the gluten thing". So I think the odds are not great when it comes to eating at the wedding. The reception is going to be huge and I hear what you are saying about trusting the staff. Since I am going to be about an hour away from home and I get sick within 5 to 20 minutes of being glutenized, I think I will just bring a sandwich or something.

But I can't help but feel kind of annoyed. I don't walk around discussing being GF. I don't have a big neon sign on my forehead. I just am and I don't make a thing about it. It's like being diabetic. You eat what you can. But since they know about it and didn't do anything about the shower, I feel kind of funny asking the bride for an accommodation now.

I really am not sure I want to write a big fat check and attend a wedding with a sandwich in my purse! But now I am just being petty I guess.

What's the right thing to do? Walk around telling everyone your medical business or keep it, to the extent that you can, to yourself and go hungry? Do you just hope that people will be thoughtful? Or do you end up sitting at a table where everyone is eating and all anyone can do is ask why you aren't eating.

Don't you all get sick of calling ahead to a restaurant and being told they have a GF menu only to find that means a salad with no dressing or a burger with no bun? Now I have to apologize because I feel a rant coming on and I hate feeling sorry for myself.




 Pounds lost: 5.0 
 
0
4.75
9.5
14.25
19
KKENT4950's Photo KKENT4950 SparkPoints: (2,043)
Fitness Minutes: (2,845)
Posts: 65
3/26/13 9:12 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I was a bridesmaid in a wedding last year. I have celiac's and multiple food allergies including a severe soy allergy. I wasn't comfortable with having a staff serving hundreds of people attempt to make me something especially with their stress of have to serve over a hundred people. I called the place (a reception hall) and explained the situation. They allowed me to bring me own food. My boyfriend got there before me and gave it to the staff. I put a note inside the stressing the fact that they needed to not contaminate my food and to take precautions to prevent it from become contaminated (not using dirty cutlery/plates).

Every passing minute is a another chance to turn it all around.


 current weight: 127.8 
 
136
131
126
121
116
GOLDILOX8 SparkPoints: (1,770)
Fitness Minutes: (2,967)
Posts: 25
3/20/13 8:27 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
That was pretty hilarious. Thanks to both of you - I needed that!

 Pounds lost: 5.0 
 
0
4.75
9.5
14.25
19
CLEISURE146's Photo CLEISURE146 Posts: 42
3/20/13 12:48 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Lol I agree, don't tell the groom. You may be better off just eating beforehand just in case. You can always slide your food on over to someone else if all else fails! lol

SHERYLINIOWA's Photo SHERYLINIOWA Posts: 21
3/17/13 10:05 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I disagree with everyone else... I say you should contact the groom, because the bride does have enough to do... Oh wait, he will just relay the message to the bride, and probably incorrectly. You'll end up with a meal that is JUST gluten LOL. So I guess I do agree :-D

 current weight: 294.0 
 
330
285
240
195
150
GOLDILOX8 SparkPoints: (1,770)
Fitness Minutes: (2,967)
Posts: 25
3/16/13 7:44 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
ou never know what's going to set someone off. She knows I am gluten free and every time I see her she offers me a beer. Her boyfriend will just put one in my hand!! Then I just look at them and they go "oh yeah, you have that thing". It's kind of comical so I kind of think she might just be flat out clueless, sweet as she is.

 Pounds lost: 5.0 
 
0
4.75
9.5
14.25
19
CLEISURE146's Photo CLEISURE146 Posts: 42
3/15/13 10:19 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I guess I don't go into too much detail about why I'm eating gluten free. I just tell people I'm severely allergic to gluten and if they have a problem with it, I figure that's their issue. lol. I tend to look at everyone like they have no clue what I'm talking about when I go into a restaurant because not too many people do. I was shocked when I went to a little town and was asking what was in one of the meals and the woman stared at me blankly, then asked me what it was I was trying to avoid. I told her gluten. She asked me if I had Celiac and it was my turn for my mouth to drop. SOMEONE ACTUALLY KNEW!

Back to your situation, I thought up another idea. I would let her know you can't eat gluten and before you call the catering company on your own, ask her if she would rather have you take care of it because you don't want to give her one more thing to do. I only say this cause (and this might just be me) but I think I would be upset knowing someone else called the catering company and didn't think I could handle it even if it was in good intentions. Just a thought :) I do hope it goes well for you

GOLDILOX8 SparkPoints: (1,770)
Fitness Minutes: (2,967)
Posts: 25
3/15/13 8:35 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I know I have to speak up. Either that or starve. I guess I just remember what it was like to be a harried bride to be. I hate to give this girl one more thing to do, as she is kind of on her own. But I will give it a go. I am also thinking I will just call the venue myself and see if I can set it up myself. I almost don't like giving someone else control over it. I think I would be happier talking to someone myself in the catering department.

Gluten free is catching on and some places are great. But do you ever get the feeling at certain places like it h no- another one of these people" - as if I am just doing it because other people are, not because I have to. Even if it was a choice, not a necessity, why the eye rolling. Is it really such a big deal?! I have only had one server ask me to explain to her what Celiac is. She was grateful because she didn't really understand what it was.

So I will let you all know how it works out. The shower is in 2 weeks and the wedding is in May. Keep your fingers crossed. When I get glutenized I get sick within 20 minutes. It's horrible. Some people I know get sick hours later, but they stay sick longer. I am sick for a few hours, not for days. But it's pretty bad so I hate to have anything happen when I have a long car ride that longer than that. Thanks for the help.

 Pounds lost: 5.0 
 
0
4.75
9.5
14.25
19
CLEISURE146's Photo CLEISURE146 Posts: 42
3/14/13 12:29 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I agree. You need to talk to her. I have found that people are very understanding especially if you tell them why you need it. The only time I had anyone get upset with me was when they didn't know and I said I couldn't eat what they were bringing to a pot luck. I've never had anyone get upset for me telling them the truth

KACEYSW's Photo KACEYSW Posts: 2,669
3/13/13 6:40 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
The responses to your questions make sense. I would let the bride know and, whether or not she can do something about it, she will be aware of your needs and not question your actions..

Refuse to be beaten by inanimate objects, inflexible minds, and incompetent practices.


 Pounds lost: 198.4 
 
0
55.25
110.5
165.75
221
KNYAGENYA's Photo KNYAGENYA Posts: 7,759
3/13/13 1:56 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I agree with everyone else. Talk to the bride. Most meals can easily be converted to gf without any type of problems. I hope it goes well.

" The road to success is always under construction."- Lily Tomlin


 Pounds lost: 4.6 
 
0
2.5
5
7.5
10
DJ4HEALTH's Photo DJ4HEALTH Posts: 43,972
3/12/13 9:33 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I agree that you need to talk to the bride and explain why you need a special diet and also remember that they would not give someone peanuts if they knew that it would hurt them and that is the same with wheat. It will hurt us and can kill us too. Slowly but it will kill us

Dorothy

If you tell God no because He won't explain the reason He wants you to do something, you are actually hindering His blessing. But when you say yes to Him, all of heaven opens to pour out His goodness and reward your obedience. What matters more than material blessings are the things He is teaching us in our spirit.
Charles Stanley


 current weight: 224.0 
 
274
235.5
197
158.5
120
FRUITBAT3's Photo FRUITBAT3 Posts: 114
3/12/13 6:53 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I think I would ask the bride if there is a possibility that a gluten free meal can be ordered. She and her fiance obviously care enough about you to invite you to be part of their special day that I am sure they would want to make you comfortable and catered for, once they know this is not a fad but a medical conditon. Most people would be mortified that they didn't know and weren't able to provide a meal their guests could safely eat.
From what you have said, I am that you would express yourself in a way that she would understand that you don't want to make extra work for her. As you implied, she may be happy for you to contact the cateres directly to save her the task but I am sure she is having ongoing discussions with them anyway as you will not be the only one with dietary needs that need to be addressed.
Don't be embarrassed to tell people what you need. We have to take responsibility for our health and this is one of the things that is necessary because gluten is so prevalent in our food today.
Good luck and let us know how you get on.

Rebecca


 current weight: 145.0 
 
146
139.5
133
126.5
120
RUNNINGTOEAT's Photo RUNNINGTOEAT Posts: 499
3/12/13 6:43 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I am helping my daughter plan her wedding right now and I have asked every venue and every caterer we have talked to about accommodating special dietary needs (never specifically mentioning GF) and every last one of them said they accommodate any type of dietary need. And they all specifically mention GF when going down their list of common requests.

If this wedding is at a regular venue, just let the bride know in advance so the people preparing the food have a little advance notice. If it is a back yard wedding, I would ask the bride about the menu. You have a medical condition and I am sure she would be happy to talk about the menu - even if she can't accommodate you. This way you would know to eat before you go and to pack some snacks.

Don't feel bad about asking for what you need! You will get used to this as time goes on emoticon

 Pounds lost: 16.0 
 
0
8.25
16.5
24.75
33
GOLDILOX8 SparkPoints: (1,770)
Fitness Minutes: (2,967)
Posts: 25
3/12/13 6:08 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
So this is the first wedding I have been invited to since being diagnosed and going GF. I don't know what the right protocol is. Do I eat before I go and just not eat there? Do I let the bride know, even though she has a million other things to do? Is it okay to call the catering department and offer to pay for my own GF meal if they will accommodate me? I don't want to trouble the bride. I don't want to make a spectacle of myself by pulling a banana out of my purse during dinner. I don't want to divert attention onto myself. I also don't want to be hungry all night. And I definitely don't want a million people asking me why I am not eating. I just want to blend in. I would LOVE some advice if all you kind people wouldn't mind. If any of you out there are in the food industry or are servers, maybe you have some good tips. Open to any suggestions. Thanks everyone.

 Pounds lost: 5.0 
 
0
4.75
9.5
14.25
19
Page: 1 of (1)  

Report Innappropriate Post

Other Celiac Disease and Gluten-Free General Team Discussion Forum Posts

Topics: Last Post:
Reacting to Corn? 10/14/2014 11:48:53 PM
Does anyone grind their own flour? 12/22/2013 11:15:24 AM
Fiber 12/8/2013 5:53:31 AM
Need help FAST! 9/22/2013 4:49:09 PM
Alternative Health and Celiac 7/24/2014 10:09:37 PM

Thread URL: http://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/team_messageboard_thread.asp?board=0x948x52504635

Review our Community Guidelines