That's a great story! Good for you. That is exactly why I am going to go for it. Even thought I still don't feel perfectly satisfied, I think it would be worse to look back on it one day and wish I had done it. My body image shouldn't get in the way of living.
I agree with you about the criticism too. One time when I was at a new school, a bunch of us students were going together for the first time. We saw some women perform a salsa-oriented dance routine, and their costumes included short shirts and bare midriffs. They did not have perfectly flat abs or cellulite-free thighs, but they looked amazing! I was so happy to see supposedly "imperfect" women be so confident in their bodies. But, of course, without fail the other girls I was with began to criticize them. They all agreed that the performers were too fat to wear those outfits, which surprised me because I doubted the performers were technically overweight, and proceeded to pick apart their bodies. I was stunned into to silence. I was upset that the positive body image message I had received was being eroded, and I was scared to speak up because it was my first chance to make friends at the school. In retrospect, I do wish I had said something and next time I will. I think even the simple act of saying, "I disagree. I think she looks fabulous," would do a lot to get other women to think more about how they think about different body types.
Thanks for bringing this up. My first thought was, "If you can fit into that bikini, then go for it!" I've had that sad experience of pulling out last year's swim suit and literally bulging out of it! LOL! I would not recommend this!
But, you have your costume and it fits, so you're good to go. And, hey, parades are about celebrating! So, you go out there and show everyone how it's done!
Here's a little story for you. In high school I played volleyball. I joined a club team and the mandatory uniform involved "buns" (you know, the glorified underwear that someone thought was a great, sporty idea for women's sports! My coach protested and our team petitioned for a change, but we were denied!) Now, I was overweight at the time, but i wasn't gonna let some stupid uniform keep me from playing. So, I went to the tournaments and turned a blind eye to any negativity. I truly think that at times a little obliviousness never hurt!
And, why do we do that to each other (and ourselves)? I mean, criticizing others for wearing something they're "too fat" for. Most of us have had that thought. I know I have. I'm gonna stop doing that. It's wrong. If it's ok for thin people to show skin, then it should be ok for bigger folks too.
What should be our response when we hear our friends make those sorts of comments?
We're always harder on ourselves than others. I went to Cancun, mexico and let me tell you people there shouldn't have been in bikinis or speedos but they were and more power to them because I could have never done that. I'm sure you will look great.
Thanks you all! I am still battling my bad body image demons, but I have decided that I am going to wear a bikini no matter what others might think. I am probably being much harder on myself than others would be anyway.
When I first joined my current gym, I had the Bad Body Blues for almost a month. I took the whole "fake it 'til you make it" & "act as if" approach to deal with it. I acted confident & as if I owned the gym, even if I wanted to scamper & hide each time I walked in. Soon, I realized I really did feel confident & now I love working out for everyone to see.
I too have a very hard time with the body image issue. Everytime I pass a mirror I feel a tinge of disappointment when I see that slight mound starting just below my breastbone. I know that I am getting older and my body is going through major changes, especially since I had a hysterectomy just shy of 6 months ago. I have to give it some time to figure out what it is going to do. In the mean time I need to feed it well and make sure it is healthy. I believe the rest will come in time. As far as the swim suit, I prefer to wear the tankinis and boyshorts. They are cute, modest, yet not dowdy.
I decided to be in a parade that takes place this month in which every participant wears a costume, but the costumes appear to be nothing more than glorified bikinis. I had knowledge of this when I made my decision, but that was a few weeks ago and I thought that would be plenty of time to lose weight. Now that the parade date is nearing, I am starting to freak out because I realize that my body is not going to be where I want it to be at the time of the parade. I keep trying on my bikini and all I can think is "My stomach isn't flat enough."
Now reason tells me I shouldn't worry, but you all probably know how hard it is to listen to reason when it comes to body image! I know my body isn't hideous, but when I think about the fact that I will be surrounded by a lot of thin people I feel like I should wear a parka or something, like I will look like a blob by association :-P . I know there is nothing wrong with my body, but all I can think of are all the not utterly thin women I've seen who were criticized for daring to bare their bodies in public. I want their confidence, but I can't past the fear of criticism.
Have you or are any of you dealing with this right now? How do you get over the voice in your head that tells you that you are too fat to do something?
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