I'm glad I went to my meeting yesterday and I a glad I faced that scale. I don't know what the number was, I had asked the person not to tell me, but I, like many of you, know before we ever get to the meeting place that we have gained. My clothes tell the tell, the way I feel after filling my body with all the wrong stuff, too much sometimes of the right stuff, but we know. I say I am glad I went not only cause that is MY time, its my time to be away from the house for about an hour, all this includes driving and the meeting. I see people that I would only see at these meetings, and all that is good. I also know if I ever make an excuse not to go just one time then there will be another excuse for yet another, and another until my chair would be empty.
Am I doing great yet? No, but I am telling myself all the reasons I am giving for not doing what I am suppose to is nothing more than a boat load of excuses. Oh and I found something else out about myself yesterday that I was totally appalled about. I am jealous of the gal in our meeting that has lost 111 pounds. Amy is just the sweetest person anyone would ever want to meet, and she tries to sit by me each week, and since she has lost the 111 pounds, she wears some of the cutest clothes, and yesterday was no exception, and Amy sat next to me at the meeting, and I kept thinking to myself, ''what is it??? Why am i feeling this way??? Wasn't until after I got home that it hit me, ''I'm jealous!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I am jealous that Amy looks great, like I once did, but I have no right to jealous of anyone, I can envy them, but being jealous is just plan stupid due to I could do the very same thing, but I had to ask myself this really hard question.....are you willing to work as hard as Amy has????
I shall continue this tomorrow.
"Just don't give up trying to do what you really want to do!"
| current weight: 206.4