There is a difference between forgiving someone and trusting them.
You can forgive and yet set a safe boundry.
For instance, you can say I forgive her, but I will not share my life, thoughts, or time with her because it is not healthy or productive.
Also, when you find it hard to forgive someone, then sometimes it helps to try and understand where they are coming from.
What makes them do what they do?
It may not be right, it may not be healthy, but we all do things wrong sometimes, and maybe this person hasn't taken personal responsiblity yet, maybe they never will, but maybe thier behavior is all they know.
Once you know why they do it you become compassionate, and when you feel for the person it is easier to forgive... as long as you see that it doesn't matter that they will never change... You are the one who must change. You must change your perception. It is your lesson and your journey. Besides if you don't learn from this person... someone just like them will come into your life over and over until you figure out how to deal.
Sorry, I sound like the mom I am. But I swear I have learned this the hard way... but boy, it sure sticks that way! : )
Wherever you are, be there totally. If you find your here and now intolerable and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally.
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