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LISASAYERS
Posts: 3,836
3/31/07 9:05 A

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Great post Thatsy! We just talked about forgiveness in the purpose driven life study that I am in. Yes! You can forgive, but you don't have to trust them....they need to earn that! Some people never will earn it back.

Make it a great day!
Lisa



THATSY
THATSY's Photo Posts: 938
3/30/07 9:51 P

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Lemon,
There is a difference between forgiving someone and trusting them.
You can forgive and yet set a safe boundry.
For instance, you can say I forgive her, but I will not share my life, thoughts, or time with her because it is not healthy or productive.

Also, when you find it hard to forgive someone, then sometimes it helps to try and understand where they are coming from.
What makes them do what they do?
It may not be right, it may not be healthy, but we all do things wrong sometimes, and maybe this person hasn't taken personal responsiblity yet, maybe they never will, but maybe thier behavior is all they know.
Once you know why they do it you become compassionate, and when you feel for the person it is easier to forgive... as long as you see that it doesn't matter that they will never change... You are the one who must change. You must change your perception. It is your lesson and your journey. Besides if you don't learn from this person... someone just like them will come into your life over and over until you figure out how to deal.
Sorry, I sound like the mom I am. But I swear I have learned this the hard way... but boy, it sure sticks that way! : )


Wherever you are, be there totally. If you find your here and now intolerable and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally.

Eckhart Tolle


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LEMON_CUPID
LEMON_CUPID's Photo Posts: 916
3/30/07 8:17 P

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I think I really need to learn this lesson...

There is one person out there (in the universe) that I just can't forgive... just one of those people who goes out of her way to be mean and evil - as this gives her life meaning and control...

I can avoid, and I can make still my mind and move on, so that she doesn't occupy that space in my mind... but I just don't feel safe enough to forgive this person...

Okay, I just don't feel safe enough to trust this person... Can one forgive without trusting?


Edited by: LEMON_CUPID at: 3/30/2007 (20:21)
"Go Confidently in the Direction of Your Dreams, Live the Life You Have Imagined." - Henry David Thoreau


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HAPPYWALKER
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3/30/07 6:11 P

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"To err is human, to forgive divine"

All people commit sins and make mistakes. God forgives them, and people are acting in a godlike (divine) way when they forgive. This saying is from “An Essay on Criticism,” by Alexander Pope.

Thanks for the reminder, Lisa.

Mary



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THATSY
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3/30/07 4:35 P

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Ahhhh... Forgivness.
When we don't forgive it eats away at our soul. To be truly free we must forgive with no expectations.

Wherever you are, be there totally. If you find your here and now intolerable and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally.

Eckhart Tolle


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CHANETC
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3/30/07 2:57 P

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Thank you! "as we forgive those who trespass against us."emoticon

"If you are not busy being born, you are busy dying." --Bob Dylan
"Obstacles are those things we see when we take our eyes off our goals."
"If we don't like where we are, change it! We are not trees."
"Let me tell you the secret that has led me to my goal. My strength lies solely in my tenacity."
-- Louis Pasteur, Chemist and Microbiologist

"Exercise vigorously & stop eating crap." www.concept2.com chanetc.vox.com/


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LISASAYERS
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3/30/07 2:35 P

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As long as you don't forgive, who and whatever it is will occupy rent-free space in your mind.
Isabelle Holland
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