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I wrote this on November 2md and it keeps reappearing. That is a good sign. It means some members look for it and bring it back to the team page, and write a comment on it.
Last week and this week it is as though God lit a fire within me! He has come to me and filled me and i have been just letting it all out lol
I am at a much better place now, then before (hat i had written about) I believe it has been the result of your prayers. I also know that it has happened because I have been talking to God, praying to God, and reading my verses in my note books. I do these things every day. However, when I need His strength, like MORE of it, all these things become much more concentrated, and intensified. When we do all of these things it always us to rest within God. When we trust this process we receive His grace and peace.
It is all a journey, and each of us are on a different path, and place with God. However, no matter where we are on this walk, we are all the same. We all sin, we all need God, we all have our good days and bad days. Each of us learn a different way, and need to do different, and yet the same things to grow closer to God. Please never read something and feel anyone is doing it totally and completely all right here on this team. No one does this, or is at that place but God and God alone. I never want any of you to read my words and think, man she has it all together! I am no one special. I am loved by God and He is the one who is special, and for whatever reason you like me, and or like the things I write it is because of Him. HE is the one who has made this happen, because it is ALL about HIM.
Thank you all sooo much for sharing your thoughts and comments here. YOU all make this team so very special.
Thank you so much for sharing and today I will start over!
My God help you take each step in peace and serenity as you get back up.
Thank you for your comments. Leaning on God and having His words in my heart makes all the difference when things are not going right for you. My loving friendship with God is a big part of healing, and starting again. Since Wednesday, which was yesterday, I have begun to feel so much better. I know the depression, and ill feelings have been lifted. I have been in the arms of Jesus but I feel HIs grasp even stronger around me now!
Today I was reminded of some verses I spent much time meditating on many months ago. As we go through things or others need your help having the word as part of your thoughts, and or in your heart helps you, and comforts you, as well as others. I believe it is the work of the Holy Spirit, as He reminds you of His love, & takes care of you through His help. The following verses are those which I was able to comfort someone else today, and as I wrote some of the words out in an email, my own heart as comforted as well:
Philippians 3:11 (from the implied bible)
If possible that I may attain to the spiritual resurrection that lifts me out from among the dead even while I am in the body. Not that I have attained this ideal, or been made perfect, but I press on to lie ahold of, and grasp & make my own, that for which Jesus Christ the Messiah lay ahold of me & made His own. I do not consider brethren that I have captured & made it my own yet; but one thing I do, it is my own aspiration, forgetting what's behind, & straining forward to what lies ahead. I press to win the prize that God is calling us to win.
I think that's part of the great joy of knowing God's promises are new every morning. He knows our need to start anew, to clear the slate of past failures that wield accusations of failure at us, to wash our feet and start walking the path again, no matter how many agains we have tucked under our belts. He knows us SO well and loves us SO well. It just slays me to consider it. We are SO blessed!
Co-leader of Can't Do This On My Own
Co-leader of I Can Do All Things Through Christ
~.~There is nothing we can do to make God love us more; there is nothing we can do to make God love us less. -- Philip Yancey~
Great! Yes, many of us do get to the point of needing to START OVER.....I have done that way too many times.....since I came to Spark people, however, I have truly cut that WAY down!!
MY NEW saying: (borrowed from Delila)
"If you want to do something, you'll find a way, if you don't, you'll find an excuse."
I could really relate to everything you said here. Especially about misconceptions about Christians. Loved this, thank you for sharing, and I'm sorry you were going through a spiritual warfare.
~ Kathy ~
Walk Leader & Marathoner!
2014: Year of JOY!
In Christ alone I find my strength.
Great words of wisdom re: yes, "spiritual people" can have depression...and about you are not a failure if you get back up.
keep pressing on, sharing transparently, and being beautiful you!
"God is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work WITHIN US" Ephesians 3:20
As a few members know this past week has been very emotionally tough on me. I was volunteering at a "soup kitchen" and something unexpected happened there, and i had been mentally drained for a few days. I talked with a few people who are very spiritual and they lifted me up and I felt God's love throguh them. When I got home from volunteering I prayed with my husband. However the next day I still did not feel emotionally good. I spent most of the next day trying to figure things out and praying to God. I was grateful to be used by God at the "soup kitchen", yet just wish some things would had been different. Two days after volunteering, and still feeling not so great I reached out to some people and shared my experience. It was then I realized I need help, spiritual help sometimes to back me up, and lift me up.
(I just want to add this. I feel better, so much better now. Howver, I truely believe I was in a spiritual attack the last 7 days, which ended last night.)
Well, 7 days had passed yesterday since I volunteered at "the soup kitchen", and i had not worked out at the gym! I can't remember the last time this had happened. I tried to drag myself to the gym, and although it did workout on my stationary bike, I was not doing many things I should have been doing. I was only drinking like, 2-3 cups of watera day ( I normally drink at least 8 cups per day) & eating ALL KINDS of crap! It was like I was feeding my brain with sugar, filling an empty place which was being replaced with depression, and the sugar was eating it all up and filling me in a dull state of immobility.
Now, anyone who knows me knows that I am a spiritual person. As I was in this state for 7 days I was reading the bible, praying every day, saying the Armor of God, and doing things to help people as well. I believe their is a misconception about a person who is spiritual. Such as Spiritual people belong to a church and attend regularly. (most do some don'rt) A person who is close to God never gets depressed, they may have an off day, but even then they aren't REALLY depressed. I am sure there are many other misconceptions as well.
Any member here who read my posts long enough may know I have suffered with real depression, and I will tell you I was close as a person could be to God while I cried, sobbed, and buried myself through it- while taking medication. There should be nothing shameful about depression, yet there is. And being a spiritual AND depressed, well some people will talk your ear off about how that just is not right. But it is right, and it does happen. In fact in the bible, I think it was King Saul who had depression. I take a medication called, Bupropion for a period of time a couple times a year, and I started taking it again last week. Somerimes I don't need to take it for a few years, other times I just need to take it through the winter months. If is here for me when I need it, and when I know I need it I swallow that pill until God let's me I can stop the medication again.
Today is a new day and before I went to bed last night I decided to start over again. We all have to start over sometimes for sdifferent reasons. My husband and I have start overs after he comes home and has had a bad day at work. He starts crabbing, and then I react and go off on him, and then sometimes one of us says, "Let's start over." We start over and begin the evening the right way with love, kindness, and less offense. You know what, it works!!!
Do you need to start over? I did and decided to do so even though it was in the middle of the week. (Wednesday) Starting over it a great way to stay in tune with your goals, maintain your weight, (I may have gained a pound, but I will lose it) and become healthy before you really get messed up.
We are not perfect, and we don't live in a perfect world. We make mistakes, we slip up. But you know the difference between a failure and success. You become a success by getting back up!
Edited by: GLITTERGIRL69 at: 11/4/2011 (15:12)