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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/21/14 1:39 A

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Chatted with my son, David, on facebook this evening. His new girlfriend, Pimjai, lived in Thailand until she was 6 and has now lived here for 18 years. She is 24. David is 26. She is going to college now. Not working. But he said she was in the military. He was very vague about that. I apologized for asking so many questions, but he said that was okay, I had a right to ask. That made me feel good. I told him I was just "happy that he seemed happy !" And he replied that Yes, he was very happy ! I'm so glad he seems to have found someone special. He hasn't had a steady girlfriend for several years since he broke up with a girl named Sarah that he was with for 3 years I believe. I'm really looking forward to meeting Pimjai. David is blonde but I have no problem with him dating a Thai girl. I think it bothered my mother. But she is 83 and old fashioned. David said he met Pinjai online. That's the modern way, isn't it !?

I'm finishing up day #8 alcohol-free. I want to lose 7 more pounds in the next 21 days - before Sept 10th which is my 2nd Sparkiversary. That would bring my weight down to 159. I'd break into 150ville ! I would be thrilled. It's going to be difficult. I'm going to drink lots and lots of water. emoticon

Have a great day tomorrow,
God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/20/14 1:13 A

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Woke up this morning with a sore throat and earache, so I postponed the lunch with David. Talked to him on the phone briefly and found out his new girlfriend, Pimjai, is from Thailand. He seems really happy. I'm happy for him ! I wonder where they met. I need DETAILS, ladies ! LOL !

Had a new microwave oven delivered today. It is really nice. Since we don't have a car, it is so much easier for us to buy things online and have them delivered. Purchases over $50 at Walmart are free delivery and the microwave was on sale for $55 so Perfect ! I love it !

Still not feeling very good tonight so I should probably get some sleep. How are you feeling, Alison ?

Take care ladies,
God Bless,
Valerie




Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/18/14 11:34 P

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So sorry you're not feeling well, Alison ! emoticon

I had problems with my computer also. Now using an old monitor that I had saved as a "back-up"

Tomorrow my son, David, and I are going to lunch at a seafood restaurant called "Get Hooked". I plan on having a grilled grouper sandwich but want to substitute a salad or cole slaw for the fries. David (26) has a new girlfriend that I want to find out about. I saw her name and picture on facebook. Her name is Pimjai and she might be Indonesian or Indian/Oriental -- I'm not sure. I'll find out all the details tomorrow. All I care about is that my son is HAPPY !

I'm finishing Day #6 alcohol-free. I walked to the doctor's office this morning to have blood work done. I'll find out the results next week. My weight is coming down. I was 166.5 today. My short term goal is 165. So close !

Going to read devotions with my sweetie now.
Take care everybody,
God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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ALISONCHRISTIAN's Photo ALISONCHRISTIAN SparkPoints: (12,811)
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8/18/14 9:42 A

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I have the flu, girls :(. Been sick since just after our company left on Friday night. Also....something is wrong with my laptop and it won't turn on. I will check back in when at least one of those problems resolves!

"Nothing happens without a dream."


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JUST_BRENDA's Photo JUST_BRENDA Posts: 1,736
8/17/14 7:51 A

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Val, awesome on getting AF again. I'm still working on that one. It's become such a habit!
Alison, glad to hear you are enjoying getting back into the routine. Structure can be a great thing for us. I know I benefit from it.
I'm in my workout gear, waiting for a few more minutes before I leave for the gym. I skipped out yesterday. I find I need to go to the gym 4-5 times a week to meet my strength training goals. That is a lot!
I still need to cut back on my calorie consumption. I was actually thinking of going to an Overeaters Anonymous meeting. Still thinking...
I was on facebook and I saw a link to my estranged sisters website for money mentoring. Geesh, I would rather not see any sight of her. I'm upset about how nasty she has shown herself to be. She mentions how money can ruin relationships but fails to mention how she has chosen to terminate her relationship with her own siblings, especially when one of them was facing a critical illness. Oh well, I can't change the world.

Brenda


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/16/14 11:03 P

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Completing Day #4 AF.

Johnny confided in me today that he SO FEARFUL of having another seizure and has great trepidation of leaving the apartment. He wanted his script filled for his seizure medicine. He had previously said that he could live without it. The script for a month was only $50 - - but the problem is that you can't STOP taking the medicine abruptly. It can trigger seizures that won't stop. Therefore we'd have to go see a neurologist to get refills on the script which would be hundreds of dollars for an office visit. Johnny is no longer covered on my insurance. I'm thinking of putting him back on it during open season this fall. I don't know how we are going to afford going to see the doctor to get refills. Johnny said, "Let's just take it one step at a time". I really love Johnny, . . . but I have to admit that I really don't like that he has health problems. I don't say anything . . . but I don't like being a "nurse". I want him to be "strong" and full of "vitality". Getting him to eat a little something once a day is like "pulling teeth" ! LOL He is SO SKINNY ! I have to admit - - I'm always worried he'll have another seizure also.

Well tomorrow is Sunday - our day to report on our Challenge. I had one night of drinking - and I think I'm going to be upset with my weight in the morning. We'll see.

Talk to you tomorrow,
God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/16/14 1:00 A

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Hope the dinner went well, Alison. What did you serve?

I finished Day #3 alcohol-free today - which is great - BUT I ate a lot of mixed nuts AND popcorn, too, so I'm worried about my weight in the morning. Doesn't do a lot of good to cut back on the alcohol calories if I just replace them with food calories ! LOL ! Oh, Well. Nuts have the good-for-you fat and I make the popcorn on the stove with canola oil which is good too, so I guess that is some saving grace.

Monday I get blood work done. Last year it was perfect. Hope that is still the case.

I bought a blood pressure monitor and my blood pressure was slightly high after my Tuesday night drinking. I'm sure it will return to normal if I remain AF.

Johnny and I played RUMMY together this evening. We hadn't played that in at least a year - maybe two. It was fun. I won. But Johnny was a good sport about it. I was surprised that he played quite well after 3 seizures last month. I've noticed some memory loss now and then. He's a singer/songwriter with his guitar, and he forgot the lyrics to some of his songs. I think he sings "off key" now as well, although I'm no expert, and I haven't told him that I think he is singing "flat" now. He doesn't perform so I don't want to hurt his feelings by telling him that the seizures seem to have given him "amusia" which is the loss of musical ability caused by brain damage or genetics. Hopefully his "pitch" will return. idk
I'm happy that he goes to the store every day now. For the first week or so out of the hospital, he was "afraid" to leave the house for fear of having another seizure. I talked to him about that - that I felt he was becoming agoraphobic - and he has pushed himself to go out. That is good. He quit his job of taking care of the lawn here at the apartment building, however. That was a big job with little pay anyway. I can see that it would probably be too much for him in this Florida heat. With all the rain we've been having, the grass is really tall and thick. I doubt that the junky push mower the landlord provided will even be able to cut it ! oh, well. Like an old friend of ours used to say, "Not my problem".

Hope to hear from Christine and Elle. (may have had flooding) and Brenda - How are you doing ? How are your girls ?

Take care,
God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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ALISONCHRISTIAN's Photo ALISONCHRISTIAN SparkPoints: (12,811)
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8/15/14 10:21 A

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Just a quick check in this morning from me. We are having company for dinner tonight and I have to go into town to buy some groceries and then, clean my house. It has been a good week for me getting back into my normal routine. I will try to remember to post on the challenge thread on Sunday....looking forward to hearing from others who have made progress.

Hope everyone has a great weekend....what is everyone up to?

"Nothing happens without a dream."


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/15/14 12:28 A

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Had a busy day today. I returned bra to the store that I decided was too small. Then I walked to the post office to buy stamps and mail a picture of myself to my 83 year old mother. She had requested one. She doesn't have a computer and hadn't seen me in several years. I've lost weight (40 pounds) and got new glasses so I'm sure I looked quite different than she remembers me. Then I walked over to the grocery store and bought a special deal. If you bought 4 boxes of cereal or cookies for $2.50 each, you got a gallon of milk to go with it. I used to be "lactose intolerant" but I've got over that by slowly re-introducing dairy into my diet, and now use real milk instead of soy milk. I like that it is "real" and "natural" without additives, and preservatives, etc. I had a veggie pita sandwich for lunch and a banana and an apple for snacks. I cleaned my fish bowl today too. Looks so much better. I took a nap this afternoon. I had baked Tilapia for dinner. This evening we watched "Seal Team Six" about the raid to kill Osama Bin Laden. It was an exciting movie - like a documentary. We really liked seeing actual "history". Tomorrow morning is my exercise class - but I doubt that I will make it there. We're staying up late these days and sleeping later and later in the morning. Oh, well.

Hope to hear from Christine and Elle. Worried about flooding in their respective areas (Detroit and Cape Cod).

Have a good day tomorrow.
God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/14/14 12:46 A

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Alison - Happy your husband made it home safely and you two are reunited ! That was a LONG walk you took together ! Have you posted pictures of your quilts on your Spark Page ? I'll have to take a look.

Brenda - So sorry about the "hit and run" to your tent trailer. Darn it !

Elle and Christine - Have you had problems with flooding? Hope you both are okay.

Let's really finish out the week STRONG !

Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/13/14 11:54 P

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Thank you Alison ! That made me SO HAPPY ! I feel a "renewed vigor" to keep our little team afloat.

I am starting over with another alcohol-free streak. I made it 35 days - and then used the suicide of Robin Williams as an excuse to buy a bottle of wine. I drank WAY too much. 3-4 large glasses I think. We played special music as a tribute to Robin Williams.
"Tears of a Clown" by Smokey Robinson
"Send in the Clowns" by Judy Collins
"The Rose" by Bette Midler
"Rockin' Robin" done by The Jackson Five
"Long Black Train" by Josh Turner

Very sad he was in so much pain. He was a beautiful person. I especially loved the movie "What Dreams May Come". Anybody else ever see that movie ? It is about Heaven and the after-life. Very poignant considering the circumstances.

Take care. Keep Sparking !
And God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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ALISONCHRISTIAN's Photo ALISONCHRISTIAN SparkPoints: (12,811)
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8/13/14 12:09 P

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Hello All!
Sorry that I have been MIA for over a week...I went down to Houston to visit with my daughter, Sarah and her husband Joel (and of course my precious little Bumblebee, Ada) and I just got home on Monday. DH, Tom, had been gone since before I left on his trip to Seattle but he arrived home too so I have spent the first part of this week trying to get back into my "normal" routine. Val...I hope that you don't disband this little group. I can imagine how frustrating it must be to be the only one posting and feeling like no one cares. I have been a part of a number of Spark teams and I would say that it is normal for it to only be a few people posting. It seems like people like to join teams but they don't really keep up with them. This is the only team that I check in with every day and I try to post most times. I like it because it is so small. It would be nice if our members checked in a little more but I appreciate those of you who do and especially our valiant leader, Val, who spends so much time and energy trying to motivate and educate us. So....Val....I understand if you want to quit but I, for one, hope that you don't!
I will post in the challenge thread about my successes and failures but I am within a couple of days of ending my "Dog Days of Summer Personal Challenge" and I can tell you right now that I am not going to meet my goal of losing the weight that I've gained over the past 6 months. :( I guess that I will just have to make myself another challenge and keep at it!
We are enjoying some lovely cool days around here and I love it. On Monday, Tom and I walked around Lake Fayetteville (5.3 miles) and then went out for lunch. He didn't have any work lined up since he just got home so it was nice to spend a day together.
I finished the quilt that I made for Rose and took it down to Morrilton before I left for Houston. Her Mom loved it! I sold another quilt on Etsy last week...yay! Now, I have to get busy and make some more to add to my store.
Looking forward to getting caught up with everyone!


"Nothing happens without a dream."


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JUST_BRENDA's Photo JUST_BRENDA Posts: 1,736
8/11/14 6:50 A

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Hi Val,
Glad to hear you had a great day! It really sounds like a good time. Very pleasant surprise.
Honestly, I'm in a bit of bummer right now. We've been trying to sell our tent trailer, even though it's kind of late in the season for that. We decided to go camping this weekend. Now that the kids are much older, they really lack enthusiasm, so Bill and I have less "reward" (and, I more tolerate camping rather than enjoy it). Anyhow, on the way home yesterday, the tent trailer gets hit by another vehicle which keeps on moving. So we file a police report -- which means waiting 1.5 hours in the hot sun. When I call the insurance, I find out we are not covered for collision. Bummer!
Just another pain in the butt thing to deal with emoticon
Oh well, things could be much worse.
On the upside, we can take military daughter home for two nights starting the first Saturday in September. She's having a hard time with the physical requirements: running, pushups, etc but she says there are many other officer cadets that are totally out of shape too!
Here's to a better day!

Brenda


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/10/14 8:33 P

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Good Evening Lovely Ladies,
Well Christine and Elle both posted today on the Challenge Thread and Alison probably will soon also, so I'm feeling encouraged to keep our little team "alive".

Johnny and I had a really good day. We were invited to lunch with an elderly couple that recently moved into a retirement home. I expected a cafeteria and we got a "five star restaurant" complete with chandeliers, cloth napkins, fresh flowers on the table, menus, waiters and a chef in a big hat. It was awesome. I ordered fried fish and fresh fruit with cottage cheese. The fruit was excellent with even black berries ! What a treat ! For dessert there was a big "sundae bar" with lots of goodies to choose from. Afterwards, we hung many pictures in their apartment. She had one large beautiful painting of a "shell" in green and blue which she didn't have room for - - so she gave it to US ! We hung it over our bed and it looks WONDERFUL ! She also paid us generously for the work we did ! I hope we get to go to lunch with them again. We had so much fun.

We celebrated 8 years together this weekend also which was GREAT ! We listened to Josh Turner who we were listening to when we first "hooked up" and hadn't heard since then. He has many romantic love songs and a deep voice. He's also very cute ! We loved watching his videos on the computer. (We also have new speakers for the computer which sound awesome).

BUT - I didn't have a drink ! I don't know how I resisted ! 34 Days Today ! emoticon

Johnny and I love each other more and more every day. We are so happy together.

Hope you all have a good week. Christine's is going to be super busy with a big graduation party and house guests. Elle probably has to work - but I believe she likes her new job. Alison - How was Houston? Did you give Rosie her quilt ? Is your husband still out of town?
Brenda - How is your daughter doing at military school ?
Anybody else ? Please post. We want to know you're out there !

Take Care and Keep Sparking,
Valerie



Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/7/14 10:36 P

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Well, I have to admit I'm getting kinda lonely on this little team. I'm the only one posting. I've joined a Christian team called "Dancing to the Beat of God" and it seems like a great team of wonderful women. It is very active. So, Christine and Alison, since you are the only two who ever post on the "Lovely Ladies" Team, would you like to join me on the Christian Team and we'll just let this team go to "Team Heaven" ? I'll send you both emails. I don't want to be a quitter and give up - but no sense beating a dead horse either, right? LOL Let me know what you think.
God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
8/5/14 12:35 A

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I had a super busy weekend and remained alcohol-free. Friday I did a bunch of shopping at Dollar General for things we needed and saved 3 - ($5 coupons off $25 each) plus $6 in other coupons for a total of $21 off $75. Woo-Hoo ! I love it when I save money! Then I took the bus 2 miles to pay a bill and walked home, stopping at the grocery store to buy a peach to eat on the way, and then at the Thrift Store where I found some plastic divided plates which should come in handy for eating on the patio. Then I did 3 big loads of laundry. After that, I dyed my hair and it turned out great. Friday night Johnny wasn't feeling very well so we postponed "date night".

Saturday Johnny and I walked 3 miles to do some banking and took the bus home. That night we had a lovely "date night" but I still didn't drink !

Sunday, after watching Joel Osteen, I walked to the blood mobile at the WalMart which is 1-1/2 miles away and donated blood. I was happy my hemoglobin was high enough now after taking iron pills for a month. My blood pressure was perfect also (112/74) which surprised the tech after I told her I had walked there in the Florida Heat. They gave me a $10 gift card for WalMart which I used to buy 2 pair of sterling silver CZ earrings. Then I walked home so I got 3 miles of walking Sunday also. We watched a Tom Petty Concert that we had recorded and were really surprised when Stevie Nicks was the guest star and sang several songs. I love her. The concert was awesome.

Today I really took it easy other than buying a pair of sunglasses at the convenience store on the corner.

Alison - how was your trip to Houston ?
Brenda - how are your twins doing ?
Christine - how was your weekend?

Have a great day tomorrow,
God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/31/14 12:10 A

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Just_Brenda - Hoping your twins are both okay. I'll keep them in my prayers.

Thanks for asking where I get the "strength" to stay AF alcohol-free. I bought myself a bracelet from Christianbook.com that has the inscription "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" This is a quote from the apostle Paul in Phillipians 4:13
Seriously - I really don't have the willpower on my own to avoid alcohol. I admit I love it. And once I start drinking, I don't want to stop. It is only with prayer to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ that I can resist that first drink. And if I avoid the "first" drink, I won't be tempted to have another and another. After a while, the cravings really starts to diminish. You realize that you're not thinking about having a drink all the time and the days start to add up. I'd really like to celebrate Friday night cuz it's my "payday" but I just don't want to get started down that path of drinking every evening again. I would just gain the weight back that I've lost. I guess, basically, I want to be THIN MORE than I WANT to DRINK !
Also check out what Paul wrote in Ephesians 5:18 "Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you." (New Living Translation). I agree with AA about that - You need to draw on the strength of a Higher Power. But I refuse to say "Hi, I'm Valerie and I'm an alcoholic" The medical community doesn't even call it alcoholism anymore. I prefer to say, "Hi, I'm Valerie and I have an alcohol use disorder"

God Bless,
Valerie



Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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ALISONCHRISTIAN's Photo ALISONCHRISTIAN SparkPoints: (12,811)
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7/30/14 6:55 P

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Hi all! It is raining here! Wow...that is SO unusual for this time of July. I love hearing it on the roof and thinking about my vegetable garden soaking up the moisture.
The quilt is almost finished. With Tom away, I could work on it as much as I wanted so I have been focusing on it for the past three days. The only thing left is the hand sewing which will take a couple of hours. I am taking a break tonight but I can do the rest tomorrow night while I watch TV. I am pretty happy with the result...it was difficult in places but I don't think anyone who doesn't quilt will notice the imperfections. Maybe I will try to post a picture of it when it's done (if I can figure out how ;).
Good to hear from everyone. My heart goes out to Brenda...it's tough when our kids make choices that limit our contact with them. I love my kids but they are scattered all over the place and sometimes it feels like most of my energy, money and time goes into trying to stay connected with them.
Val...you are doing so awesome! You must be over the moon about losing those 8 pounds...that is a LOT!!!!
Christine....I like your bunny names ;).


"Nothing happens without a dream."


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JUST_BRENDA's Photo JUST_BRENDA Posts: 1,736
7/30/14 5:05 A

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Val, no call last night but I checked my other daughters phone. Both (the one at RMC and the one still at home) had rough days. emoticon I'll see if I can find out details later.
You're doing wonderful at being AF!!!! What do you use to tell yourself you have the strength? I think I don't believe in my own ability to be AF so am not... the same for losing weight...

Brenda


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/29/14 11:53 P

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Christine - I SO WISH we could be friends IRL ! You are a wonderful, beautiful woman !
Alison, too - you are an awesome lady !
And Just_Brenda - terrific mom !

This team may be small - but THIS TEAM ROCKS !

Christine - love the names for your bunnies - Faith and Hope ! Perfect !

Alison - How is the quilt coming along ?

Just_Brenda - How is your daughter doing away at military school ? Has she called again?

Anybody out there lurking? Please post !

Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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CHRISTINE1623's Photo CHRISTINE1623 SparkPoints: (12,577)
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7/29/14 9:12 P

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Brenda, I completely understand the loss you feel about your daughter leaving. At least she is taking a positive direction in her life. I think we can all agree that being a parent is full of joy and heart ache.

Valerie, if we lived closer, I would be your friend IRL !!

Alison, I would love to see some of your quilts. I bet they are beautiful. About 15 years ago, all the women in my family (my Dad's side) use to get together every couple months to quilt for an entire weekend. We made several quilts for different family members. My aunt passed away and the tradition did also. I miss the memories! I have the quilt we made for me and a couple other quilts my Grandma quilted decades ago!

I want to name the rabbits (when ever we get them) Faith and Hope! I think Michaela might be agreeable!

Edited by: CHRISTINE1623 at: 7/29/2014 (21:13)
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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/29/14 12:32 P

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Hi Just_Brenda ! So good to hear from you ! It must be VERY ROUGH for you to have your daughter leave for military school ! Like you said - it's a "grieving" process. I'm sure you are very worried about her. But you raised her right - and I'm sure she will be okay ! I will certainly pray for her safety and happiness and for you to have faith and strength to get through this time of missing her. God Bless !

Johnny is doing so much better this morning. I never said anything about his appearance - but he decided to shave and put in his dentures anyway all on his own. He's looking great. He's using his electronic cigarette and I made ice tea for him to drink. He's not complaining (Thank God). We've got to make it till Friday. (3 more long days !) We have the Christian Radio station on and I just noticed he's reading a paperback novel. This is really GOOD. Now I guess I'll go shave my legs and wash my hair and clean MYSELF up a little bit since Johnny made the effort.

I have been AF for 3 whole weeks. My weight has dropped from 177 to 168 ! Woo-Hoo ! I'm thrilled ! Friday will be the TEST to remain AF ! I'm going to pray constantly for strength. I've got my bracelet on "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" I never take it off. It reminds me to stick with my plan.


Alison - keep quilting. You WILL get it done !
Christine - did you buy your daughter any bunny rabbits yet? Decided on names ? Your husband probably needs to make the cages first. Exhausted from your trip to Nashville ?

Have a Wonderful Day and God Bless,
Valerie


Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/29/14 6:03 A

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Good morning ladies!
Val, sorry to hear that Johnny isn't feeling well. Hopefully that'll pass soon.
Alison, I guess you won't be doing too much Sparking with all that quilting ahead of you emoticon
Christine, great to have to travel for a happy occasion.
I had a rough day yesterday --- and Sunday night. We dropped off our oldest daughter to College on Sunday afternoon. I feel like I've transferred "ownership" of her. She now belongs to the military and they dictate her schedule. Luckily, they are being easy on her for the first week, and she was allowed to call for about 15min the last two nights. Plus, she's sneaking some text messages in. She sounds like she's doing well so far. I'm just going through a grieving process because I do like her and enjoy her company- we get along pretty well. It hasn't hit her twin sister yet, but I'm there to support her when it does.


Brenda


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7/29/14 12:14 A

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Wow, Alison ! Big job to sew a quilt and less than a week ! ? You Go Girl !

I feel bad complaining about Johnny this morning. Actually I'm VERY HAPPY that he is smoking the electronic cigarette instead of real ones. I bought the starter kit months ago, hoping he'd switch, and he was very reluctant to do so. So FINALLY, he is using it. I'm not saying it is "safe" but I believe it is "better". He still gets nicotine. But no tar and smoke. When he was in the hospital 3 weeks ago, they did a chest X-ray and his lungs were perfect. He wants to keep them that way. Everyone was amazed since he has smoked for over 30 years. I'm sure this is a big adjustment for him. AND he's not drinking beer (because we are broke) I made lemonade and ice tea. He also ran out of his seizure medicine. I'm going to buy the script on Friday the 1st when I get some money. So without beer and cigarettes and no meds - all in all - it's understandable that he doesn't want to "clean up" I guess. At least he's not complaining. He's just been quiet and watching TV. He has been known to have "temper tantrums" in the past, which I REALLY hate, so I should be thankful he's remaining calm. Can't wait till Friday !

I'm finishing up 3 whole weeks alcohol-free ! I'm proud of myself for that. Lost over 8 pounds so far ! Woo-Hoo ! The not-so-good part of being alcohol-free is that memories of embarrassing moments, traumatic events, people, etc. are coming flooding back. I would rather not remember most of what is popping into my head. When I drink, I feel warm and relaxed and happy. I miss that. Lately I've been rather bored. And, amazingly, even though I'm not drinking, I get very tired. I take one or two naps every day. I wish I had more energy. But it's so hot outside, I don't even want to go for a walk. And I have very little to do. We don't have a single friend left. Everyone we knew was an alcoholic, drug addict, loser. Some have died. One is in prison. Others we have told to "not come around here anymore". Some moved away. We wanted to get rid of the "bad" people we knew, but now we have no one to talk to other than each other. We need to join a church and make some new friends. Johnny and I run out of things to talk about. We're together just about 24/7 ! Well he has gone to bed. I should join him there shortly.

Take care and God Bless
Valerie



Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/28/14 12:03 P

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Just a quick "hi" from me this morning....I need to get sewing. I am going to try to finish Rose's quilt by Saturday so that I can take it with me when I go down to Morrilton for her sister, Lily"s, 4th birthday. I am also leaving for Houston on Sunday. I had to rent a car because Tom took our reliable car to Seattle and my Pathfinder is not safe for long drives. Yikes...expensive but not as expensive as flying ;).

Hope everyone has a great Monday. Christine....glad to hear that you are back safe from Nashville. Val...sorry to hear about Johnny...do you think that he is a little depressed?

"Nothing happens without a dream."


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7/28/14 10:53 A

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Glad you had a great time in Nashville. Was the wedding wonderful as well ?

We have one of Kid Rock's CD's with the song "All Summer Long". An X- friend of mine, Jenny, loved that song and every time she visited we would play it - and all sing along of course. She doesn't go anywhere without a beer in hand. In Florida we have "summer" all YEAR long ! LOL That's one of only a few good memories of Jenny. A few weeks ago I texted her "Don't ever contact me again" and she listened to me and I haven't seen or heard from her since. After several years of not talking to Jenny, she had come back into my life for about a month, and I had gotten all "stressed out" and "upset" about her. She really drives me CRAZY ! Now that I haven't talked to her again, I've calmed down and feel a lot better. She really is TOXIC to me. I don't want her in my life. Ah ! I'm getting all worked up just thinking about her ! LOL

Well, I don't have much to do today. The new sheets I ordered should arrive by UPS today so I can make up a fresh bed. Johnny isn't feeling very well, so he probably won't be up to "trying them out " LOL Darn it ! We're broke and he doesn't have any beer or cigarettes. That makes Johnny into a very "unhappy camper". He's drinking lemonade and coffee and smoking an electronic cigarette and watching TV. He hasn't shaved in probably a week. He also hasn't put his dentures in his mouth for days. He really looks like sh-t ! LOL I love him so much - but I have to admit I'm disappointed that he has let himself "GO". It would make me so happy if he would take a shower and shave and put in his teeth and get dressed. Johnny doesn't have a job. He has no income. I certainly don't ask for much ! LOL Just fix yourself up a little !

Oh, well. I think I'll go clean the bathroom. That sounds like FUN ! LOL

I'm on Day #21 alcohol-free and have lost 8 pounds in that 3 weeks ! WOW ! I'm THRILLED about that ! I'm ON A ROLL, Ladies ! emoticon

God Bless and emoticon
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/27/14 7:47 P

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Hi Ladies!
Nashville was great. No celebrity sightings though! Val, I loved the story about Wes meeting Alan Jackson and not knowing who he was! I have never met a celebrity. Probably because I usually don't leave my small town in Michigan! lol. Although, Kid Rock is from Romeo, Michigan, about 30 minutes from where I live and people have spotted him around here before!

Alison, when we get our rabbits, they will live in a cage in our garage. One of my 3 dogs already sheds bad so I don't need any more fur! My daughter has tried numerous times to talk us into getting a mini pig! lol. I think they are cute but I'm not completely sold on the idea. My husband insists that we are not having "swine" living in our home! ha ha

Once again, I have to get back on track with diet and exercise! I've lapsed a little. Val, you asked about tracking calories. I do it on my spark page. I like it and its easy. It tracks my calories, carbs, fats and protein. For me, I'm not able to successfully lose weight if I don't watch my calories.

Ladies, have a happy and successful week!

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7/25/14 10:56 A

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Yes, Christine, Nashville sounds exciting. You never know who you will see ! I love country music ! Tuesday August 5th, there will me a Country Music Award Show on TV. Johnny and I always watch those. They are so entertaining ! A X-friend of ours,Wes, talked to Alan Jackson at a truck stop and didn't know who he was. Wes thought he was the truck driver of the big rig that said "Alan Jackson" on it and asked how he could get a job like that ! Wes had never heard of Alan Jackson ! Wes is an idiot. He must live under a rock ! Mr. Jackson asked him if he had ever heard his hit song "Southern Man". Wes thought he might know it. but not sure . . . .anyway - I Love Alan Jackson ! Love all the Country Music Stars.

Oh, and have a great time at the wedding, too ! LOL

Alison - Hope the visit with your mother-in-law goes well. Praying she recovers quickly.

The landlords are supposed to show up today to check on our HOT apartment. Hope that goes well, also. I know they won't want to buy us insulation for our ceiling - but that's what we really need.

Funny that Alison and her husband used to raise pigs and Christine has a picture of 3 piglets as her profile picture . . . . just a coincidence I guess . . . LOL. . . never been fond of them myself . . . . but my son, David, LOVES bacon ! LOL

Have a Lovely Weekend both of you - and anybody else lurking ? ! (if you are - please post and let us know you're out there. )
Valerie



Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/25/14 10:32 A

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Have a great time in Nashville, Christine! We have a young, musician friend who lives there part of the time and he says that he sees country music stars ALL of the time...so I don't know why you couldn't see some too ;).

I understand that rabbits are good pets for kids but I clean a house where one lives and the fur is EVERYWHERE! I think that they belong outside...just my opinion :) . My husband and I used to raise pigs for a living so if you ever decide to go really big....pigs are the best!!!

I am continuing to enjoy my time alone. I have lost the two pounds that I gained while we are at the Lake House so I am feeling really good about my plan. Tom's mom broke her hip last Sunday and was finally moved to a rehab hospital yesterday so I am planning to go into town this evening to visit her. She is a difficult person but with Tom away...I need to represent our family.

I hope everyone has an awesome weekend!

"Nothing happens without a dream."


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7/24/14 9:33 P

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Val, that's funny that you said that about Paula Dean being accused of being a racist because my daughter said the exact same thing! Thanks for the cute rabbit stories. I will keep you posted on the whole rabbit situation.

We are leaving at 4:30 in the morning to go to Nashville, Tennessee for the weekend. Although my husband is not from Tennessee he has siblings who live there and we are going to a wedding Saturday night. Tomorrow night we are going with some family to the bar scene in down town. Who knows maybe I will run into Tim McGraw and Faith Hill?!? lol..ok, probably not.

Good night ladies. Be blessed and be a blessing!

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7/24/14 9:33 A

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Christine - raising rabbits sounds like a great hobby for your daughter. I like the names you are thinking of except I think Paula Dean has a bad reputation after the racist scandal last year. idk. We always name our pets after bands or musicians because Johnny is so into music. We have a blue parakeet names Metallica, a blue beta (Siamese Fighting Fish) named MUSE, and a tiger-striped cat named Zeppelin. lol

I have a funny story about rabbits. I had a female rabbit that had babies and then died. I called a friend and left a message on her answering machine that "my rabbit had died". She called back thinking I meant I was PREGNANT ! lol

I had another rabbit that I let out of her cage to run around the living room - and she nibbled through my husband's computer wires. He wasn't too happy about that. I gave the rabbit away.

Once I offered to take care of a friend's rabbit while she was on vacation. She didn't know if she had a male or female. We put her rabbit in the cage with my female - and MY female rabbit jumped on top of HER rabbit immediately ! That was confusing ! ? I guess she was just showing him how to do it. lol Anyway her rabbit was a male, got the hang of it, and my female got pregnant and had two babies (but they died unfortunately.) My rabbit was too old, I'm sure.

Long story short - your daughter will have a great time with her rabbits, whatever their names! God Bless !

Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/23/14 2:42 P

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Alison...I can understand your thought process in eating right when Tom is away. I buy some "crap" food for the rest of the family, that is in the house. When I have a weak moment, I KNOW where the crap is! lol. My thoughts and prayers are with you in making positive changes in your life.

As far as the weather in Michigan...yesterday we had a high of 95 and today is a high of 72. Seriously. I was sweating to death yesterday at the fair and today I am wearing a hoodie and long yoga pants. That is Michigan .Valerie: You live in the paradise state six months out of the year, so hang in there!!

My daughter loves 4H and wants to do more. She gets a real joy and happiness out of this and I support her. She wants to show rabbits (actually she wants to show larger animals but we live in the country but NOT on a farm..lol) . My husband is totally on board and has offered to build a cage/pen by September 1. So now we are thinking of two female rabbit names. My top two choices are Oprah Winfrey and Paula Dean..ha ha. Any thoughts??

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7/22/14 7:47 P

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Alison - I'm praying your husband, Tom, has a safe trip. You have a good attitude - he's in God's hands and you can take this time for yourself. I'm looking forward to your blogs about changes you want to make in your life. And you can eat whatever and whenever you want.

I hear you about the heat ! It is 90-95 degrees here every day. Since we no longer have any insulation in our new ceiling, our little AC can't get our apartment below 85 degrees all afternoon and evening. Right now it is 87 degrees INSIDE ! This is terrible. If the landlords won't put insulation in the ceiling - I'm going to pay for it myself. I get cranky when I'm hot ! LOL If that doesn't help, we're going to have to think about moving somewhere with better AC. Hopefully we would have a pool as well. That would really be nice. Problem is - moving is very expensive and our budget is VERY tight. I can't wait for December ! It hardly cools off down here before then. It can be 80 degrees in January !

I'm not getting any exercise because of the heat. I don't even want to lift weights in the bedroom. One good thing - I don't have much of an appetite either when I'm HOT.

Well, enough complaining. Johnny and I are going to sit outside on our patio for awhile. Hopefully the sun will go down soon and maybe there's a little breeze.

TTYL,
Valerie



Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/22/14 10:28 A

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Tom left this morning super early for his trip out west. I have been up since 4:30am since I couldn't go back to sleep after he left. I hope and pray that he has a safe trip. I don't like the fact that he will be driving so far alone...he is not as attentive as he used to be so I worry that he will have an accident. I'll just have to trust God to keep him safe.

I am taking advantage of Tom being gone to "press the reset" button on my eating. I initially lost my weight on the Curves plan so I went back on that this morning. It is easier when I don't have to cook for Tom. If I stick to it...I know that I can lose the weight that I have regained over the past few months. I am also going through the house and throwing away anything that would tempt me to overeat.

I am excited to have the next month to do some soul searching in every area of my life. A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog about needing to make some changes in my life. I am going to use the next month to figure out how to move forward in some of these areas.

It's TOO hot here today so I am thankful for AC. Hope everyone has a great day!

Edited by: ALISONCHRISTIAN at: 7/22/2014 (10:30)
"Nothing happens without a dream."


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7/20/14 10:07 P

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Good Evening !
I changed my ticker to reflect my days alcohol-free rather than my weight. It just seemed more significant. Besides my weight had gone up ten pounds from my low of 163. I also used a different quote from the Bible - one that I read years ago and is very applicable to my ticker. Check it out !

I made a really nice Sunday dinner today - lemon/pepper chicken, stuffing, chicken gravy and French style green beans. Johnny has been eating a little better since he got out of the hospital. Unfortunately he is also drinking beer and smoking cigarettes. I thought the seizures would be a wake-up call to quit. In fact, he did try quitting smoking - made it 5 days - but took it up again. He'll never change. Well I shouldn't say "never". You "never" know. LOL.

Years ago, when I would listen to Joel Osteen - he would give me hope that I could lose weight. It seemed impossible. I had tried so many times unsuccessfully. Then I found SP and lost over 40 pounds (I know I've put over 10 pounds back on - but STILL, I'm thinner than I used to be !) He was right. "With God, All things are Possible" Matthew 19:26

It's not too late to join our "Kick Your Own Butt Challenge". You design it specifically for YOU so you can start whenever you want ! Check out the challenge thread.

Johnny claims that he really appreciates life after have 3 seizures. He says he "thinks differently" now. He's also scared to do things like take a shower, cut the grass, ride his bike for fear he'll have another seizure. He's taking anti-seizure medicine. I don't know how we're going to afford to buy more. He wants to keep taking it. He even said he'll give up beer to buy his meds. That's a good thing.

Well, I'm going to visit with Johnny for a little while. Hope you all had a "lovely" weekend.
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/20/14 8:39 P

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True Fact: The battery in a smoke detector will never die during the day, only at night when you are sleeping! LOL. At least at my house anyway!

Val, at least your smoke detector dilemma helped you to get some exercise in!

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7/19/14 11:20 P

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Good Evening LL !
Our smoke detector went off at 7am this morning waking us both up. Luckily it was a false alarm. So I went to Dollar General to buy another 9V battery but the detector was "dead". So I walked to WalMart to buy a new smoke detector. I got in a long walk in this Florida 95 degree heat. I walked 1 1/2 miles to WalMart and back - a 3 mile walk. Believe me I was dripping with sweat by the time I got home. But I was proud of myself for doing it.

I'm also proud of myself that I'm finishing up Day #12 alcohol-free. Tomorrow morning I'll weigh and report on the Challenge thread. I think I've lost 3-4 pounds, maybe 5 pounds, in 2 weeks of not drinking. We'll see.

Talk to you tomorrow
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/18/14 12:46 P

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Alison -
The dusty rose quilt for Rosie sounds absolutely lovely ! Really precious !
Tom gone for a whole month! Wow - that seems like a long time, but it's great that you're going to take advantage of that time to eat healthy and walk. Just think how great you'll look when he sees you again after a month ! Now that's motivation !
emoticon
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/18/14 10:43 A

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Hi all!
Tom and I are headed to Morrilton this afternoon to spend the night at his daughter's place and to visit with our granddaughters. It is about a 3 hour drive but it will be nice to see them. On the way, I am planning to stop at a little quilting fabric store to look for some fabric for my newest grand baby's quilt. Her name is Rosie so I am looking for fabric that has dusty roses in it. I found some online but I always like to support a local business if I can so hopefully there will be something there that works.

I am doing good with my personal challenge. I have followed my walking plan every day. Unfortunately, the scale is saying that I have gained weight :(! I guess I am going to have to cut back more on my food and alcohol. Next week, Tom will be leaving for a month to visit some friends and family in Seattle and BC. I am planning to take advantage of him being gone to eat simply.

I hope everyone has an awesome weekend! Christine...have fun at your 4H, doggie show. Val...your patio sounds nice...hope it cools down in your apartment. I will be back on Sunday to check in on the Kick Your Own Butt Challenge thread :).

"Nothing happens without a dream."


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7/17/14 10:16 P

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Good Evening !
Sounds like both of you, Alison and Christine, are having busy summers ! Alison with friends and Christine with her daughter's 4H Group and niece's wedding in TN ! That's wonderful !

Today Johnny and I didn't have anything planned and we ended up re-arranging and cleaning our patio and taking care of all my plants. We really work well together and actually have lots of fun making our living environment better. The patio looks so much bigger now and really terrific.

While we were working outside, we heard a "crash" next door and then had to lift the disabled neighbor lady off the floor and get her back into bed. I also put a bandaid on her leg. Johnny swept up the broken coffee mug. I swear this place is becoming an assisted living facility ! We're not getting paid to be caregivers. But I suppose it is the neighborly thing to do to. But when "Margie" started making racist comments about our president - - I had to just walk out. She had mentioned having me clean her apartment, but after the things she said, I don't want that job. She sends me to the store occasionally to buy her cigarettes. I don't want to do that anymore either. Johnny can do that for her. He has lots more patience with her than I do. He made her laugh today. When she was sitting on the floor, unable to get up, she said, "I know I'm just dead weight". Johnny said, " Not DEAD weight ! You're still alive aren't you ! ?" LOL That was pretty funny.

Tomorrow I've got to walk over to the pharmacy to pick up my medication. That's about all I have planned. But stuff always comes up. You never know what project Johnny and I will get into.

It has been SO HOT in our apartment - 86 degrees INSIDE every afternoon. Terrible ! It makes me "cranky". Outside it's been 95 so I guess that's the best our little AC can do !

I'm doing really good on not drinking, however. Today is Day #10 in a row alcohol-free ! I'm proud of myself for that.

My younger son, David, (26) is in Orlando for 3 days/3 nights to party. He said they have a big video arcade for adults when you can drink. He is always traveling and partying. He doesn't have a steady girlfriend, but a large cirlce of friends that he hangs out with. I'm glad he has a fun life - but I do wish he could find someone special to settle down with. Isn't that just like a mother to say ? !

Well, It's after 10 pm and the thermomether reads 84 degrees in here. Unbelievable ! But outside it still reads 87 so . . . . Still - I would love to be in the 70's again ! Hopefully before Christmas ! LOL

Enjoy all your summer fun and I hope you're having good weather !
Alison - are you walking every day ?
Christine - are you tracking your calories?

Have a Wonderful Weekend !
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/17/14 4:03 P

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Hi Everyone! Alison, it sounds like you have been having a nice time visiting with friends! Good for you. Valerie, I hope you are back online and things have been alright with Johnny's health. As for me, I am having a busy week. We had a community potluck dinner/discussion at church last night. Saturday is my daughter's big 4H dog show. We have to go to the fair grounds tonight to help set up the agility course. Tomorrow night we will go back for practice. After the dog show Saturday evening, I am going to a Memorial service with my mom. Tuesday night we are back at the fair grounds to work the concession stand for our 4H group. A week from tomorrow, my husband and I are going to Nashville, TN for the weekend for his niece's wedding. I usually don't have this much going on....lol. The 4H fair and all the happenings are one of my daughter's favorite times of the year. I get my joy out of her happiness (as mother's, don't we all). Anyway, I have been staying on track with my goals. So far, so good. Take care~

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ALISONCHRISTIAN's Photo ALISONCHRISTIAN SparkPoints: (12,811)
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7/17/14 9:52 A

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Hi Everyone! I am have a fairly quiet week. Last night I got together with some girlfriends for mimosas and finger food. I did okay with my intake of food and alcohol. This was a birthday celebration for one of the gals who lost her husband a year ago at only 53 years of age. We didn't celebrate her birthday last year since it was so close to her husband's death but we wanted to do it this year. This is a small group of 4 ladies (including me) and we have been friends for about 10 years and have been through a lot together. We only get together every 6 weeks or so but it is precious time.
Today, I am having lunch with a young friend who just had a baby. She is Turkish and I really enjoy hanging out with her...she is so sweet. She and her husband used to be part of our house church and she and I have been meeting weekly for a couple of years. Even though the house church is no more...we still get together to discuss books, raising children and just life.
It has been unseasonably cool here in NWArkansas and today, we are expecting rain. That is good because my garden needs it desperately!
I hope everyone has a great day!

Edited by: ALISONCHRISTIAN at: 7/17/2014 (09:53)
"Nothing happens without a dream."


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/15/14 9:47 P

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Sorry I haven't been around. The plumber was here yesterday and he accidentally cut the Verizon internet cable when he was digging in the courtyard - so no internet for 24 hours until Verizon came today and laid new cable. Ah ! Great to be back ! It drives me CRAZY when I can't get online.

Glad you survived camping Christine ! Johnny and I lived in a tent in the woods for almost 4 months together with no running water or bathroom - talk about roughing it ! We DID, however, have a generator than powered my CPAP machine at night for sleep apnea and we even had a little black & white TV with rabbit ears (back in 2007-08 you could do that still). Needless to say, I've had enough of camping and have NO DESIRE to sleep in a tent in the woods again! LOL

Hope you had a good time in Maryland, Alison. And you sold THREE quilts ! WOW ! Wonderful !

My son and daughter-in-law came over for lunch today and I made Chinese. Chicken and Chinese Vegetable Stir Fry, Pork fried rice, egg rolls with duck sauce, egg-drop soup with chow mein noodles, and ice cream and fortune cookies for dessert. My fortune: Smile and Rejoice, fortune is smiling on you. I like that ! Everything was great. We had a good time.

My apartment is SO Incredibly HOT this summer. I think the AC needs to be cleaned. It is 86 degrees INSIDE in the afternoon. This is just NOT ACCEPTABLE ! Granted it is 95 degrees outside but STILL ! This is a new AC. It should cool it off at least down to 80 degrees indoors - which I know, still sounds HOT to you all up north, but I could be comfortable at 80 when it's 95 outside. The landlord is on vacation right now. I'll talk to him when he gets back.

One good thing about the internet being "down" yesterday - Johnny and I decided to have afternoon delight - which really was DELIGHTFUL ! I'm feeling so much better about Johnny now, LOL ! He's drinking beer and smoking cigarettes but at least he hasn't touched hard liquor since the middle of March and he's eating better now. Johnny was really malnourished (super skinny) and dehydrated. I picked up anti-seizure medication at the pharmacy today and I'm sure that will help as well. I have been alcohol-free for 8 days now and doing great. Just-Brenda is right that we can only really change ourselves - not other people. I'm not drinking - and the weight is coming off.

So happy Christine and Alison have joined our "Kick Your Own Butt Challenge!" Alison has her own personal name for her challenge - but that's fine ! This is a personal challenge designed by YOU specifically for YOU ! How about you, Just Brenda ? Check out the thread at the bottom for Challenges. You pick ONE or maybe TWO specific things to work on and set your own GOAL. We post every Sunday (if you can) with a report of how you're doing. It's Never too late to START ! I'm alcohol-free - 5 days last week and going for all 7 this week. Christine is working on her calorie range for the day and Alison is going to do the Leslie Sansone Walking Program. Please Join Us. And anybody else lurking out there ! What do YOU need to work on ? Design your OWN challenge !

We CAN DO IT, Ladies !
Valerie

Edited by: GREEN-EYED-LADY at: 7/15/2014 (21:50)
Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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ALISONCHRISTIAN's Photo ALISONCHRISTIAN SparkPoints: (12,811)
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7/14/14 3:11 P

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Just wanted to say "hi". Tom and I got home from Maryland last night so I have been spending today getting back in the groove of being home. I sold three quilts on my Etsy shop while I was gone so I had to get them ready to ship and in the mail. That always takes a long time! I stepped on the scale this morning even though I knew it would be a downer. After a week of unmonitored eating and drinking, I expected to gain weight. It wasn't too bad. I gained 2 pounds which won't be difficult to lose if I get back to tracking and moving.

I hope everyone is doing okay. Sorry to hear about your troubles with Johnny, Val, and I hope and pray that things get better soon!

"Nothing happens without a dream."


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JUST_BRENDA's Photo JUST_BRENDA Posts: 1,736
7/14/14 12:34 P

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Blah, blah, it's Monday again. Although I start out complaining I admit that I do like the structure of the work day. As long as there aren't too many of them!
Christine, I'm glad you had a good time camping. We've camped many times! However, I find it's much less fun now that the kids have grown up. The older two are too busy to come and the younger one is much less interested. Oh, the other thing is that, as I'm approaching the big M, my inner body temperature can become insane very unexpectedly. So I wonder why I should leave the air conditioning!
Valerie, sorry to hear about your anxiety levels. It does sound like Johnny's untimely death is inevitable due to his lifestyle choices. You are smart to recognize your own pattern, but the question is what can you do about it now. I would suggest checking out a local 12 step group --- Al-Anon or Codependents Anonymous. We can't change other people, only ourselves.

And, speaking of changing oneself... I'm getting back on the SP bandwagon: tracking food intake (as best I can) and exercise. I'm also going to work on cutting down the drinking. Way too many calories especially since I'm over indulging in coolers these days.

It's never too late to start, right?

Brenda


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CHRISTINE1623's Photo CHRISTINE1623 SparkPoints: (12,577)
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7/13/14 6:03 P

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Valerie, you certainly have a lot on your plate!

I'm back from camping. Had many laughs, good conversation and made some great family memories. Camping is WORK! lol. I have been doing laundry all afternoon and my laundry room floor is still not visible....clothes, towels, blankets, pillows....you name it.

I am on board with the "Kick your own butt" challenge! Love the name. I definitely need the motivation and support.

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CAPECODBABE's Photo CAPECODBABE Posts: 5,384
7/13/14 10:45 A

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emoticon Val

xoxo elle~


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/13/14 10:07 A

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My computer/internet connection is working GREAT today !
I lost 3 pounds in a week by being alcohol-free ! (I know it's probably water - but STILL !)
Two reasons to be really happy this morning -
But -
After seeing Johnny have 2 tonic-clonic (grand mal) seizures last week (and a 3rd at the hospital) , I am living in constant trepidation (fear). When I wake up in the morning, if he is still asleep in bed next to me, I have a moment of PANIC that he might be DEAD ! I check to see if he has a pulse and is breathing. During the day - I'm constantly staring at him to see if he's okay. If I'm in the other room and I hear a loud noise, I come running to see if he had a seizure and fell down. I hate feeling like this - always nervous.

I'm also ANNOYED. My previous husband also had seizures related to alcohol and nicotine. I'm upset that I am going through this AGAIN ! I picked another alcoholic. Isn't that typical ?! You end up with the same kind of guy you were with before. My father was an alcoholic so, of course, I would pick an alcoholic to be my partner. Not once. This is my 3rd one ! CLASSIC !

So now what do I do ? You made your bed - you lie in it, right ? I'm upset. More with MYSELF than I am with Johnny. I should have know better. I knew Johnny was an alcoholic. What did I expect ? I've been with 2 alcoholics before. They both died. Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure this out !

Johnny is going to die young. He's 10 years younger than me - but he will undoubtedly die before me and I will be a widow again for the 3rd time. He said the seizures were a "wake up call" and that he would change - but he is drinking and smoking just like he did before. The only person I can change is MYSELF. "I" need to make some changes. Johnny needs to go to REHAB. I will get him back on my health insurance and then INSIST that he goes to rehab. (before it's too late).

Going to watch Joel Osteen on TV now. He always gives me HOPE !
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/12/14 4:57 P

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Good Evening Lovely Ladies,

We're having lots of problems with our free Verizon WiFi in our apartment building so I haven't been able to get on line much yesterday or today. I'm finally able to post something this evening. If you don't hear from me for a while, know that it is just technical problems with the internet connection. I'm NOT ignoring you ! LOL It drives me crazy when I can't get online or my connection freezes up. It's so frustrating. I'm going to post this before my computer has another STROKE ! LOL
Miss you,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/10/14 6:32 P

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Hi Lovely Ladies,

I went to donate blood today and found out I was anemic (again). My hemoglobin was only 10.5 mg/dl. It is supposed to be at least 12.5 to donate blood. The normal range is about 11 - 14 for women. I've been diagnosed with iron-deficiency anemia in the past and prescribed iron pills. I stopped taking my multi-vitamin with iron a couple months ago. Looks like I need to take iron again so I bought some slow-release iron pills at the grocery store on the way home. I've been having heart-palpitations when I lie down which I've had before and is a sign of anemia. I should have known I wouldn't be able to donate blood today. But at least I got 2 miles of walking and found out for sure that yes I AM anemic and bought the iron pills so I'll be fixed up in no time ! A free blood test. That's cool. Explains why I've been so tired lately too. I thought it was just the stress of Johnny being in the hospital for seizures that had made me exhausted. I'm sure that's a factor as well.

Well enough about my iron status. How are you all doing? Are you joining our little challenge in which you set your own goal and own program and report every Sunday on your weight and number of days during the previous week that you succeeded in meeting your goal ? We can encourage each other. I'm on day #3 alcohol-free and feeling very committed to staying that way. How about you? What do YOU need to work on?

Hope to hear from you. Let's GO Ladies !
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/10/14 9:18 A

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Good Morning Lovely Ladies,

Are you joining our "individual challenge"? I am working on being alcohol-free and Christine is going to stay within her calorie range for the day. What about you? Both Brenda's? Are you with us? How about you, Elle? Anybody else out there? Pick a specific goal to work on and keep track of the number of days you meet your goal. Report on Sunday l. your weight and 2. number of days in the previous week you met your goal.

On Sunday July 13th I should have 5 days alcohol-free during the previous week. Maybe I'll drop a pound or two by then as well.

We need a NAME for our CHALLENGE. Any suggestions? Let's vote. Some ideas:
Summer Sizzle Challenge
Kick Your Own Butt Challenge
Do It Yourself Challenge
You Can Do It ! Challenge
One Day At a Time Challenge
Sunday Confessions
Tailor-Made Challenges
Solo-Mission Challenges

My favorite is "Kick Your Own Butt" Challenge

What do you think? What do YOU want to work on? Are you with us?
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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CHRISTINE1623's Photo CHRISTINE1623 SparkPoints: (12,577)
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7/9/14 5:06 P

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I'm loving the excitement and motivation here ladies! My problem is usually going over my calorie range. My challenge is to not go over 1400 calories per day. My first mini goal is to not eat over 1400 calories Sunday, July 13 - Saturday, July 19. Depending how I do, I may have a "reward" day after that, we'll see...

When I get home on Sunday, I will weigh myself and report in (ugh....it's gonna be bad..lol).
I'll be off the radar until then, so I hope that all you lovely ladies have a safe and enjoyable weekend! Thank you for your kind words and support.

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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/9/14 12:27 P

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Hello Lovely Ladies !

We need to "challenge ourselves" and "motivate ourselves" ! Everybody examine your own eating, drinking, and exercise. Pick one to three specific things to work on. For me, personally, my weakness is alcohol. I know that when I avoid alcohol completely, my weight just comes off naturally. What do YOU need to work on ? Walking every day? Eating veggies every day ? Getting a good night sleep every night ? On your start page or on a regular calendar - record EVERY DAY how you did on YOUR specific GOAL. I mark AF (for alcohol-free) 1D (for one drink) MOD ( for 2-3 drinks) or DD (for a DRINKING DAY of more than 3 drinks). If you're working on walking, record your milage or time every day. Whatever applies to YOU. Count the number of days for the week in which you met your GOAL. For me - that's the number of days that I'm AF. Report on here every Sunday (like Christine said) your WEIGHT and the number of days in the previous week that you successfully stuck with your program. (number of days you walked or drank enough water, etc.)

Val - July 6th - weight 176 - 1 day AF

My 2nd Sparkiversary is September 10th when I want to reach my goal of 159 pounds. You can pick a date that has significance for YOU. Maybe Labor Day? Or a Birthday? etc.

Everybody CHALLENGE YOURSELF - and let everybody else know
l. What and When you want to reach your GOAL
2. What you are going to work on EVERYDAY.
3. On Sunday - Report your weight and number of days you succeeded in the previous week.

Just because I, personally, want to quit drinking doesn't mean that THAT is what YOU need to work on. Pick your own challenge. But let's encourage each other to work on our individual programs. We can DO THIS, Lovely Ladies ! I've got 63 days left to my End Challenge Date. I was AF yesterday and I'm AF TODAY ! Woo-Hoo ! Feeling Great.

Valerie



Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GRAINGRINDER's Photo GRAINGRINDER Posts: 9
7/9/14 11:01 A

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Christine, Have fun camping emoticon Its one of my favorite things :-)


Valerie I'm not sure if it would help but pick one thing you want to do daily , while you do that I do my walking ( Im trying to do my walking everyday but not doing it consistently) . We can change it up when Christine comes back or continue. I know I do better with accountability and a little encouragement emoticon

So what do you think up for a mini 5 day challenge :-) ahh come on what do you have to lose?

brenda d

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CHRISTINE1623's Photo CHRISTINE1623 SparkPoints: (12,577)
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7/8/14 7:43 P

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Hi Ladies!

Val...I would love to start a challenge with you! I need some motivation. However, to be totally honest I am leaving Thursday for a four day camping trip. I will NOT be able to stick to an eating plan and not drink alcohol. I can't even pretend that is possible.

Could we start something "official" on Sunday, July 13?? Maybe some other ladies would like to join? Maybe Sunday morning could be our "starting" weight? Please let me know!!!

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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/8/14 7:12 P

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Good Evening Lovely Ladies,

I've got to get SERIOUS ! I started a 3 month challenge as a count down to my 2nd Sparkiversary on September 10th. One month has gone by. I've been drinking a lot. And my weight has actually gone UP. In the beginning of March, I weighed 163. Today at the grocery store I weighed 177 ! OMG ! I've gained 14 pounds ! This is just NOT ACCEPTABLE ! I'm not going to touch a DROP of alcohol ! I'm going to eat a lot of veggies. I'm going to drink LOTS of water. And I need to walk every day. Only 63 days left ! And I want to get back down to 163 . That's ironic. I should play 63 on the lottery. This is my declaration of COMMITMENT. I AM GOING TO SUCCEED ! I CAN DO IT !

Elle's little saying will be my mantra. "Every time you drink . . . you steal happiness from tomorrow."

Have a nice day tomorrow ! God Bless you with your GOALS !
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/6/14 11:25 P

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Thoughts About Changes and New Beginnings ---
I know you're wondering what will happen in . . . "The Next Chapter of Your Life"

The next chapter of your life . . . what's it going to be like?

It isn't always easy to make changes, but there's no better advice than this: just do your best. Make sure you stay strong enough to move ahead, because there are some wonderful rewards waiting for you.

It won't all make sense right away, but I promise you: over the course of time, answers will come, decisions will prove to be the right ones, and the path will be easier to see. Here are some things you can do that will help to see you through . . .

You can have HOPE. Because it works wonders for those who have it. You can be OPTIMISTIC. Because people who expect things to turn out for the best often set the stage to receive a beautiful result.

You can put things in PERSPECTIVE. Because some things are important, and others are definitely not.

You can remember that beyond the clouds, the sun is still shining. You can meet each challenge and give it all you've got.

You can count your blessings. You can be INSPIRED to climb your ladders and have some nice, long talks with your wishing stars. You can be STRONG and PATIENT. You can be GENTLE and WISE.

And you can BELIEVE in happy endings. Because you are the author of the story of your life.

- - - Douglas Pagels

May the next chapter be a wonderful one for you !

Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/6/14 9:32 P

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Yes, Just-Brenda, that is a terrific idea to surprise your daughter when she comes home for a visit ! Work on 5 pounds at a time with little rewards along the way (that don't involve food or alcohol such as new walking shoes or a new hair style) You Can Do It ! And please keep on posting to let us know how you're doing.

I lost 40 pounds since I joined SP in Sept of 2012 but now I have re-gained 10 which is very upsetting to me. The only way I can lose weight is to be alcohol-free. I didn't drink the entire month of May (41 days) but then drank quite a bit in June hence the weight gain. But also my hormones changed. I had gone without a period for 9 months and thought I was finally menopausal and done with all that. Then I bled for the past couple weeks ! I think I've been under a lot of stress with Johnny having seizures and being in the hospital. I'm going to have a PAP smear next week to make sure it's not cancer.

Speaking of Johnny - after 3 seizures on Wednesday morning he spent 3 days and 2 nights in the hospital and came home in the late afternoon on the 4th of July. Apparently he was very stressed out, drinking and smoking since he was a teenager, not eating properly, and he got very dehydrated and his electrolytes (sodium mainly) were "off". He has been home for 2 days now and doing fine. He didn't smoke for 5 days (3 in the hospital and 2 at home) and then after we made love this evening he wanted a cigarette and had one. Darn it ! I hope he quits again tomorrow and this was just a temporary set back. He says the world looks different to him now. That this has been a wake-up call and his entire perspective has changed. I've noticed some minor memory loss but nothing serious. Like I wrote before, he's quit a lot of other addictions and he knows how to do it. I read on line that nicotine can cause seizures and his doctor told him that he needed to quit. Fortunately his lungs are still perfect. He got quite a check-up: CAT scan, MRI, abdominal ultrasound, chest X-ray, blood work, etc. Well I'm just so happy he's home. Seeing him have grand mal seizures was VERY scary (now called tonic-clonic seizures). I love him so much and don't want to lose him.

Johnny was so proud of me that I didn't open the door for Greg and Melissa but I am really worried about the baby. But like Brenda wrote - it's not my responsibility. I'm not a professional. I thought it was CRAZY that Melissa stopped taking her birth control pills and got pregnant on purpose to begin with since Greg didn't have a job and their relationship was so rocky and dysfunctional. They lost their apartment in the last month of the pregnancy because Melissa couldn't work - she was a massage therapist. So they've been living in a homeless shelter and apparently got kicked out of there - probably because of alcohol or drugs. Greg was also running around with a young whore. He wanted Melissa and the baby to spend the night here so he could go "party" with this girl a couple months ago. I said absolutely NO on that occasion also. I have to admit that I'm kinda proud of myself for being able to say NO to them. In the past, I've opened my door to ANYONE. I've had to set some limits.

I've also cut off Jenny. I've written about her before. 5 years ago she broke her leg and I was driving her to and from work for a few weeks. Yesterday she said that I had been drinking when I picked her up from work and that I was driving crazy. I remember driving her and I took that job VERY SERIOUSLY. I know FOR A FACT, that I definitely did NOT drink during the day when I had to go pick her up in the afternoon from work. That she would accuse me of drunk driving FIVE years later is just plain WRONG. I take great offense to that. I texted her this morning "don't ever contact me again" and I haven't heard from her today. I'm surprised she didn't try to talk to me about it - but oh, well - she is a damaged individual with lots of problems and never really a friend. I remember the last time I drove her I was very upset with her and told her so in the car because one of her boyfriends was taking care of her at home with her broken leg and she was still fooling around with another boyfriend who also happened to be married. So, I guess because I didn't approve of her lifestyle she is now accusing me of drinking and driving. Losing her as a "friend" is not much of a loss.

We're listening to a Bob Seger CD and I'm having a Mike's Hard Lemonade (just one). Tomorrow I HAVE to get back on my program - alcohol-free and watching what I eat and walking. Together we can do this, ladies !

God Bless You,
Valerie
(p.s. drink that water !)



Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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CHRISTINE1623's Photo CHRISTINE1623 SparkPoints: (12,577)
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7/6/14 3:56 P

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Brenda, that is an awesome idea to surprise your daughter with a slimmed down "mom"! And you are right, it is a perfect motivator for you! I am a sucker for those weight loss shows when they do the "big reveal" to their family/friends at the end!

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JUST_BRENDA's Photo JUST_BRENDA Posts: 1,736
7/6/14 11:47 A

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Hi Val,
I'm glad to hear that you didn't open your door to the toxic couple. You know that would not have gone well. Yes, it's sad that a baby is involved but you cannot take on that responsibility.
Scary stuff with Johnny. It sounds like he is a ticking time bomb in his current state. I hope and pray that something substantial changes before he dies an untimely death.
That actually serves to give me a wake up call... although I don't drink in the morning I have been drinking heavily and daily for years and years. Fortunately I haven't had anything really bad happen but I'm afraid it's just a matter of time the way I'm going.
I hope to change that.... severely cut down on the drinking and control my eating. I need to lose 50 pounds to get to a healthy BMI.
In terms of motivation, I have an idea. My daughter will be attending military college in Quebec, 2 hours away starting the end of this month. I probably won't see her before the Thanksgiving break in October, and maybe not until the Christmas break. Wouldn't it be awesome to surprise her with a slimmer version of myself! Obviously it would mean much more to ME than to her, but it could be a motivator for me.

I hope everyone had a great 4th of July or Canada Day.

Brenda


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
7/4/14 10:39 A

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Happy 4th of July ! Hope you have a WONDERFUL Holiday ! Johnny is feeling really good and hopes to come home today. I think they will discharge him. My opinion has changed about rehab after Greg and Melissa and the baby showed up at my door at 11:30 at night last night. They got kicked out of the homeless shelter and wanted to find a place to spend the night ! I'm worried about the baby but I refused to open the door - talked to Greg thru the window. I recently found out he is a "junkie" and don't want anything to do with him. I was afraid that it was a "trick" for me to open the door (and Johnny wasn't here) or that once I let them stay ONE night - I would never get rid of them. I am no longer the "shelter" for all the homeless bums in the neighborhood to "crash". For 4 years I had someone sleeping on my couch almost EVERY NIGHT ! We put an end to that. He wanted me to come out and talk to Melissa - but like I said, I was afraid to open the door being home alone. Now I really want Johnny to come home. Over Johnny's lifetime he has quit "pot", "cocaine", prescription pain pills, and every other drug and "hard liquor". If he can do that on his own, he can cut back or quit drinking beer on his own as well (if he wants to). He is a very strong person. If he doesn't WANT to quit - then going to rehab for 30 days won't help either. It would just delay drinking 30 days. When he got out of rehab - he would just go back to drinking beer. But he wasn't eating much either. He is SO SKINNY ! He was extremely dehydrated ! They have had him on an IV for over 2 days now. I wish I could see his lab results. Seizures can be caused not only by epilepsy but also alcohol withdrawal, dehydration, drugs, lack of sleep, etc. Half the time they never figure out what caused the seizure.

Johnny just called. They want him to have an MRI before he goes home and they probably won't do an MRI on the 4th of July so he'll be stuck there for the holiday. We can watch the fireworks through the hospital window. lol I'm going to head over there now.

God Bless You ALL and GOD BLESS AMERICA !
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/4/14 9:34 A

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So sorry about Johnny, maybe something good will come of this and it will be a wake up call for both of you. (Keeping my opinions to myself because I would be a tough love person).

I'm glad Johnny is feeling well, and hope you both (and everyone else)
have a wonderful 4th emoticon emoticon emoticon

xoxo elle~


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7/4/14 7:47 A

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You are in such a tough place with Johnny. You are right, you cannot give him an ultimatum unless you intend to stick with it completely. At least you are honest enough with yourself to know you could not kick him out. Are you able to afford the medication to stop the seizures? So, in your opinion, the seizures only occur when he does not drink? Addiction is living hell. Please know that I am praying for you and your situation every day. In light of everything, try and have a nice holiday! Actually, I know you will try because you are always positive!

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7/3/14 10:35 P

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Thanks Christine ! Johnny is feeling fine but they're keeping him a second night. I keep saying that I want him to go to rehab but he is refusing. I met the neurologist today, Dr Gu. The ironic thing is that he is the SAME neurologist that treated my previous husband (who also was named John, coincidentally) who also was an alcoholic and suffered from withdrawal seizures. That was back in 2003-2004. Back then he said medication was NOT indicated when the seizures were alcohol related. Today he said that "Although the seizures could be alcohol related, he's going to put Johnny on medication anyway" (He didn't remember me as being married to the other John) Maybe the medical opinion has changed or maybe he doesn't realize how much Johnny drinks. Either way - how am I going to pay for medication? Johnny isn't covered by EITHER my health insurance OR Medicaid. I talked to the business office today as well. Fortunately they said "I" am NOT responsible for Johnny's bill so either charity will pay for Johnny or No One - Johnny has no income. She told me that I should write a letter for him saying that I support him financially. Part of me thinks I should give Johnny an ultimatum that he "either quits drinking - or doesn't come home at all" but I don't feel strong enough to stick to that plan and I DO love him and am really missing him while he's in the hospital. I called him tonight and said that I wanted him to go to rehab and he said "Tomorrow is the 4th of July - you know when I get home tomorrow I'm going to want a beer !" And I understand, because I like to drink also - but this getting up at 8 oclock in the morning and popping open a beer and having a cigarette like he does ended up with him having 3 tonic clonic (grand mal) seizures ! I can't go through this again. And he's not going to live long at this rate. It's sad. I bought him a card today about "fresh starts" and "making changes". It was really inspirational. I'll post it on here when he brings the card home. Yes, I will let him come home - I'm just talking about what a professional would tell me to do about getting him into rehab but I know in my heart that I won't kick him out. Of course, if I REALLY loved him - I'd do what was BEST for HIM - you know - tough love. Maybe we can do "home rehab". He can quit drinking at home. But he'll only do it if he wants to - and he doesn't want to quit drinking. Aye ! There's the RUB !

Well tomorrow is the 4th of July and I'm going to go to the hospital to visit Johnny. What are your plans? (lol - who am I writing to? Only Alison and Christine are ever posting once in a while. No one will read this anyway.) Well if by chance anyone reads this - HAPPY 4TH OF JULY ! GOD BLESS !

Valerie



Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/3/14 2:44 P

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Things sound a little bit better for you Val. I hope everything works out with your insurance and Johnny gets the care and attention he needs. Stay strong, keep praying and please keep us posted. Virtual hugs!

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7/3/14 9:43 A

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Feeling better this morning after a good night's sleep. I'll walk over to the hospital for lunch with Johnny soon. Thank goodness it is only a mile away. If they send him to rehab, I probably won't have transportation to visit. They probably don't want visitors for the first 30 days anyway. I'm very relieved that he is getting help. He was so malnourished and so dehydrated - extremely skinny - living on beer and not eating. I'm sure his "electrolytes" were way "OFF". I don't have access to his lab results. I used to be a medical technologist so I'm familiar with this "stuff" lol. Johnny is supposed to see the neurologist this morning. I don't want to call in case she is examining him. On my favorite show "Black Box" the main character is a neurologist. I hope I get to meet this REAL neurologist. I was also VERY relieved that Johnny's Cat scan didn't show any stroke or tumor.

I need to call my health insurance and see about putting Johnny on it. The premiums are going to be HIGH but it is important that he is covered. My landlords suggested I just let "Medicaid" cover Johnny as he has no income. I know he would get much better care with Blue Cross Blue Shield which is what I have. I think I'll call them right now.

Sorry I'm such a "downer". Hope everyone is having a wonderful summer and ENJOY the holiday !
God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/2/14 10:58 P

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Well, after Johnny's first seizure at 8 am, he went back to bed until noon and then got up, sat in his living room arm chair and proceeded to have ANOTHER SEIZURE ! I called 911 again and this time he went to the ER by ambulance. Then when they took him to have a CAT scan, I found out later that he had a THIRD SEIZURE ! So they admitted him. I spent the afternoon with him in the ER and the evening with him in his room. I was shocked at what a beautiful private room they gave him on the top floor. He was able to eat a little ice cream tonight. He is on a lot of medication (Ativan mainly I believe) to prevent another seizure. He was extremely dehydrated and his blood pressure was very high. They repeated the CAT scan and it looked normal - no stroke or brain tumor. He is being a VERY good patient. They said they would give him a nicotine patch since he can't smoke in the hospital but he said he wasn't even worried about it. He wants to LIVE - and get HEALTHY ! I walked home from the hospital at 10 pm in the dark across a busy highway which was a little scary - there are a lot of people out on the street with the 4th of July holiday right around the corner. Earlier today walking home from the hospital a guy stopped and asked me if I wanted a "ride". I just said NO ! Funny that someone thinks I'm a hooker at my age ! lol Anyway, back to Johnny - the neurologist is going to talk to him in the morning. I think they will convince Johnny to go to a rehab for 30 days. I really hope he goes. I will miss him but he needs it badly or he won't live very long at the rate he's going. Please pray for him to accept the help he needs. I'm exhausted. Good Night for now.
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/2/14 8:21 P

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Oh, Val I am so sorry to hear about Johnny and what you are going through. I will keep you both in my prayers. Maybe you can try to google some resources to help him out. Or perhaps contact your local health department to see if there are any programs he would quality for. Would Johnny resist any outside help that may be available to him? He seems to be pretty strong willed. Stress over you dog certainly is not helping anything either. We become so attached to our pets and we want the best for them and I completely understand that financially that is not always possible. My mom had to put her 15 year old cat to sleep today and we both blubbered like babies! Oh the ups and downs of being a pet owner!

Yes, I do like Joel Olsteen. I agree with you, I find him to be inspirational and his messages usually fit into everyone's normal life and the struggles we go through. Remember the tele-vangelist from back in the day... Tammy Faye Bakker and Jim Bakker? I'm afraid that con artist like them might have shed a bad light on other television ministers! And she certainly didn't do much for the make up industry! lol

Our plans for the 4th....some friends of ours are having a potluck and fire works show so we are going to that. The rest of the weekend will be pretty quite. We have a big (about 30 people) family camping trip coming up next week that we will be getting ready for. My Dad has a nice place on a beautiful lake about 4 hours north of us. I don't mind camping if it's only for a couple days/nights. I'm spoiled....I like having my own bed, my own shower/bathroom, my laptop and tv! lol

I have been exercising everyday for at least 30 minutes. It's been pretty humid so any outdoor exercise has to be done in the morning or in the evening. Even exercising with the air on gets pretty uncomfortable. My eating has not been horrible but not great either. I went to the Doctor yesterday and weighed 2 lbs heavier than last year. Not bad. But I really wanted to weigh in at 150 or less and it was 153. Oh well! My water intake has been great!

I hope that all the lovely ladies have a safe and happy Holiday and weekend.

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7/2/14 12:09 P

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Not a good morning here ! I was still in bed, waking up at 8 am, when I heard a "CRASH". I jumped out of bed, my sleep apnea CPAP fell on the floor, and I found Johnny having a grand mal seizure in the living room on the floor in front of the computer. He seized for about a minute and I stayed with him - that minute seemed like an hour. Then I called 911 when he was coming out of in but still unconscious. The paramedics arrived a couple minutes later. I believed the seizure was caused by "alcohol withdrawal" and Johnny came to - and was confused - didn't know what was going on. He didn't recognize me when he first woke up. He refused to go to the ER - and went back to bed after drinking a beer to prevent another seizure. He had only gone without a drink for probably 11 hours over night. He needs medication to go through detox and then rehab. He wants to detox at home but it scares me that he could have another seizure. Have you ever seen anyone have a seizure? It's pretty scary. For now he has to keep drinking beer - and taper off gradually, until I can get some Klonopin to prevent DT's. Living with a full-blown alcoholic is very stressful. I don't want to deal with this, wish I could afford to put him in a professional rehab. There must be some program for indigent men to go to - but I don't know how to access those resources. Maybe I can make some phone calls or research it online. For now, please pray for Johnny that he gets sober without another seizure. Right now he has a severe headache, aches all over from the muscle contractions, and hurt his shoulder where he fell on it. I love Johnny but I wish I didn't have to go through this.

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/2/14 12:27 A

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Really? You don't like Joel Osteen ? I think he's terrific and look forward to his messages every week. I'd really be interested in hearing why you don't like him. I'm honestly very surprised ! The only criticism I've ever said about him is that he talks an awful lot about the Old Testament and not enough about Jesus - but that being said - I still think he's awesome.
I always find his messages give me so much HOPE and INSPIRATION. God has always taken care of me and blessed me like CRAZY ! I agree with Joel.

Christine - what do you think about Joel Osteen? Are you a fan?

My neighbor is in the hospital with pneumonia. We sent her a card. I think I might buy her a little gift. Her husband today said that she wasn't doing well - that the bacterial infection had spread beyond her lungs. Her nickname is "Angel". Please pray for her - she has no one else in her life except for her new husband of less than a year.

My dog, Jasmine, who is 1/2 sheltie has a big lump on her face for about a month now. I think it is a "lipoma" which is a fatty tumor - not serious but not attractive. I wish we could have it removed for cosmetic reasons but we definitely don't have money to pay for surgery. It really should have a biopsy to make sure it isn't cancerous. It is bothering me but I can't figure out how to come up with the money to go to a vet.

Another thing that is driving me insane is that I'm still menstruating. I wish I was done with that. Enough already !

What are everybody's plans for the holiday ? The 4th of July is also my oldest son's birthday. He'll be 29. His wife is throwing a party for him with their friends. My other son is going to big party with HIS friends. Johnny and I will most likely be alone. But I'm not complaining. My favorite thing to do in the whole world is hang-out with Johnny just listening to music and talking. We'll watch fireworks from our patio over all the canals here by the Gulf of Mexico. I'll grill some burgers. And I really want to get a watermelon. We'll be fine.

Johnny has to paint the apartment next door tomorrow. I have to take another bus ride to do some banking. We'll both be busy. I also need to give our dog a bath and then the day after put Advantage on her for fleas. That is something I make sure I do every month all year round in Florida. She really has "flea allergy dermatitis" and if I don't put the Advantage on her - her hair will fall out. Got to keep up with it.

I walked 3 miles in this Florida Summer heat today. I was "drenched with sweat" by the time I got home - and my "tan" got even darker. When I passed a grocery store I bought a banana to keep me going - it was less than a quarter ! lol Then I stopped in a thrift store and bought myself a pair of white shorts that fit perfectly and had never been worn. They still had a security tag sown into them that I cut off when I got home. Now I need to buy some white underwear to wear with them. lol. All my underwear are bright colors! Oh, well ! When I passed a convenience store, I bought a bottle of water that really helped. I ran into an old neighbor from the where I used to live 2003-2006. I invited him over to where Johnny and I live. He knows Johnny from the old days too. I wonder if he'll really visit us. I ran into another acquaintance at another convenience store and she was BAREFOOT ! GEEZ LOUISE ! I know this is Florida and we're very casual down here, but STILL, the pavement is HOT ! How can she go to the store BAREFOOT !? She really looked like a "crack whore". Maybe she is. I don't know her very well. She asked about a homeless guy that we used to let sleep on our couch (for 9 months). He's in prison now until Thanksgiving time for battery on his "girlfriend". Needless to say - he's not allowed to come around our place anymore. But he may try to visit us when he gets out of prison. We'll have to send him on his way. We had homeless guys sleeping on our couch for 4 years. Now we've been alone for almost 2 years and it is wonderful. Never again (I hope) will we let anybody else crash here for more than ONE night. We tried to help these guys and they just took advantage of us. There was Joe (who died last year), Richard (who last I heard was in Rehab), Wes, (who now get a VA check and is doing better), Danny (the one in prison), and a few others I can hardly remember.

Well, I've written too much. Seems that Bev, (Sassi-Spring) quit the team like Emily. Oh, well. Sorry to see her go. I think she was a "social worker" and I valued her professional opinion about dealing with our "ex-friends" who drove drunk with a baby in their vehicle. She said I should have called 911 and she probably was right. The baby would have gone into foster care which is sad - but maybe it would have been for the best.

The only ones posting on our team are Alison and Christine (and once in a while Elle). I'm getting discouraged. We need to get more members. Can you all invite others to join? I'll try emailing the other members of our team to see if I can get them to visit and write something. We need participation ! Let's GO TEAM !

What are your GOALS?
How was your DAY ?
What is your PLAN?
Have you lost any WEIGHT?
How are you FEELING?
Anything new in your LIFE ?
Did you EXERCISE today ?

Come on People !
Valerie



Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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7/1/14 5:49 P

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Hi everyone! Well, I have spent a lot of time yesterday and today trying to fix various insurance and financial problems. Soooo frustrating! I hate talking on the phone and dealing with this kind of stuff really stresses me out. I solved some problems but had to let some go for a while. I need to switch gears to get ready to leave at the end of the week :).

Val...Sarah and Joel ended up renting a nice, little, three bedroom house in South Houston. It has more space than their place in California and only a 25 minute commute for Joel. It was nice to be able to be there while they got settled...now I can imagine them in their new place. Houston is one of the biggest cities that I think that I have ever driven across! Joel and Sarah won't go to Joel Osteen's church. No offense to you Val but we are not fans of Joel Osteen and even if his church was next door...no one in our family would go there. There is a large church around the corner from them. It might be a good place for Sarah to meet some other women who are home during the day with kids but I don't think that they will go there as a family. It seemed to me that their was a different church on just about every corner in Houston so I'm sure they will find a good place!

I DO enjoy traveling! At this point in my life, I HAVE to travel if I want to see my kids and grandkids so that is part of it. But, I just love to be on the road seeing new places and if I am home for too long, I get itchy feet!

Well, I hope our Canadian members are having a lovely Canada Day! I wish I was there to celebrate! emoticon emoticon emoticon

"Nothing happens without a dream."


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
6/30/14 11:36 P

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Thanks Alison! That means a lot to me. Did your DD and SIL rent an apartment or buy a house? Do they like their new place? I wonder - will they go to Joel Osteen's Lakewood church? I would really like to attend a service there some day. Maybe he'll come to Tampa and I could go to that.

Have a nice time in Maryland ! You do really travel a lot, don't you ?! That's wonderful for you. Personally I'm such a "homebody" - we don't own a vehicle and we never go anywhere ! Tomorrow I'm taking the bus about 2 1/2 miles - that's about as far as I get. lol ! Hopefully someday, I'll get another car. I have a perfectly good driver's license. Just financially challenged. lol A few years ago my sister bought me an airline ticket to fly up to Wisconsin to visit my family and I couldn't afford to get to the airport and didn't go. She was pretty upset with me. She loves to travel and is always going somewhere. I was in Germany September 11, 2001 when the twin towers fell and I just couldn't get home fast enough. That was a terrible trip. I've never really liked to travel since.

I really "fell off the wagon" yesterday partying with our lottery winnings but at least I only had beer and wine - no hard liquor. Today I was "hung-over" and realized that you could consider a hang-over to be "withdrawal" which is one of the parts of an "alcohol use disorder" (which is what alcoholism is now called by the medical community). So I have all 4 parts:
l. increased tolerance
2. withdrawal symptoms
3. drinking more or for longer periods of time than intended
4. other life problems (gaining 50 pounds and increased blood pressure)
I'm back to being alcohol-free. My goal is to be AF the entire month of July. I CAN DO IT ! I want to remember what Elle said, "Every time you drink - you steal happiness from tomorrow" That really applied to me today. My brain was really "foggy" all day. I'm finally feeling better - and now I'm getting tired and going to head off to bed soon.

Tomorrow, the First, is Canada Day. Hope that is good for our Canadian team members, Bev (Sassi-Spring) and Just Brenda. Enjoy !

The Fourth of July Independence Day is just a few days away. Hope everyone in the U.S. has a safe and fun holiday.

Good Night All !
Valerie







Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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6/30/14 11:34 A

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Hi all...I only have time for a quick post this morning but I wanted to at least check in to say "hi" since I have been MIA for the past week or so. I went down to Houston to help Sarah and Joel get settled in their new place and they didn't have internet so I really couldn't Spark properly. Anyway, I'm back for the week and then we will be headed to a lake house in Maryland for a week. I'll try to catch up on the posts that I've missed and fill in some more details of what is going on in my life before I leave again!

Good to see a couple of new members. I'm looking forward to getting to know you all :). Thanks for keeping the ship afloat, Val, you do a great job of leading the group! emoticon

"Nothing happens without a dream."


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6/29/14 11:44 P

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Happy to have BOTH Brendas joining us on this team : Just-Brenda and Graingrinder!

Johnny and I are doing great. We won $229 on the lottery last night. We were totally broke - putting pennies in wrappers - so this was truly a "Godsend". We are SO BLESSED ! We were reading devotions in bed (the Bible verse and Our Daily Bread) and were talking about how God has blessed us so much over the years and how we didn't complain even when we were living in the woods in a tent. Then I said I was going to check the lottery numbers and WOW = we got 4 out of 6 numbers ! God is so good to us. I bought lots of things that we really needed today like toilet paper and razors, lol. We didn't splurge on liquor. We are very grateful to GOD for his blessings.

God Bless All of You,
Valerie

Edited by: GREEN-EYED-LADY at: 6/30/2014 (22:53)
Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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6/29/14 5:16 P

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Hi Ya ladies,
I'm guilty of not reading the recent posts, but please excuse me... I do plan to do so soon. However, right now I have some inlaws visting (am I removed myself for a good reason) but am hanging by for a good time to "re-enter".
Anyhow, I won't get into the bS (and I realy am not good at dealing with that),,,I'm listening to their conversation as I type and that's going well...

Brenda


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6/28/14 1:44 P

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Val,
Boy you have had a time of it. I am so glad Johnny and you are ok :-)

It sounds like you had a nice time with your son, a dolphin wow that is amazing that they came up to him.

the other brenda

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6/28/14 12:31 A

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Had a "lovely" day today. My younger son, David, who is single (26) visited and I grilled him a T-Bone steak that was really tender. He brought along his kayak on the roof of his car and put it in the canal and kayaked down the canal to a lagoon on the edge of the Gulf. He got out of the kayak and was swimming when a dolphin joined him and played with him for about 5 minutes. It must have been very exciting to swim with a dolphin in the wild. I have seen them often in the canal and from the beach and when I was on a boat - but I have never been in the water with one. I'm so happy David had a wonderful day here. He lives with his father about 45 minutes inland. This was the first time he brought his kayak to my place. Usually he kayaks on the rivers. I'm not sure if he got a photo of the dolphin or not. He's a terrific photographer of nature in addition to the kayaking. I'm glad he has a great hobby that he enjoys. He's such a wonderful guy. I'm really proud of him.

Johnny is doing fine after his trip to the ER last night. It was a stress-reaction. He had chest pains and pain in his left arm but they checked out his heart and lungs and he is fine. He had angina (from stress) but not a heart attack. Thank God ! I'm glad he went to the hospital however to get checked out.

I had a stress-reaction of my own. Apparently I was "stressed" about Johnny going to the ER and today I suddenly unexpectedly had vaginal bleeding. And of course, I was wearing white pants ! Luckily I had hydrogen peroxide in the house and saved my pants. Gee Whiz! I'm 56 years old. When will I reach menopause? lol My aunt didn't stop until she was 62 so I guess it's in my genes. That was such a bother to clean up and change clothes - but I'm feeling fine - so all is well.

My "friend" Jenny is coming over to hang out tomorrow. She tends to "stress me out" so I hope it goes well. She has had a lot of problems lately and tends to "go on and on" complaining. Quite a "downer". Not much happy to say. You know what I mean.

Have a great Saturday and Sunday !
Don't forget to drink that water !
God Bless,
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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6/27/14 11:06 A

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Val, glad to hear that Johnny is alright. That must have been so scary!

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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
6/27/14 2:05 A

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Good Evening Lovely Ladies !

So happy to hear, Brenda, that your adult child is doing well now ! Thank God !

My sweetie, Johnny, had pain in his left arm tonight and I called 911 and he went by ambulance to the ER. Fortunately he wasn't having an MI (myocardial infarction) or heart attack. They gave him nitroglycerine. Seems he was having angina from anxiety. The doctor wanted him to spend the night, but Johnny signed himself out against medical advice and walked home. I prayed tonight while he was gone - and God answered my prayers - Johnny is fine.

My son, David, is coming over for lunch tomorrow. I've been saving a T-bone steak for him that I'm going to grill over charcoal on the patio. He's bringing his kayak for the first time and going to try out the many canals we have here on the edge of the Gulf. He usually kayaks in the freshwater rivers where he photographs gators, birds, turtles, snakes. etc. We have many beautiful large sea birds here in the saltwater canals, though, like herons,and egrets, and pelicans so many he can get some photos.

It's late. I'm finishing up day number 3 alcohol-free. I was tempted tonight while Johnny was in the hospital - but I resisted. By the way - vodka is not low-calorie. It is 40 % alcohol (ethanol) and ALL ethanol has 7 calories per gram so an ounce of vodka has about 100 calories. A regular drink can easily have 2 1/2 ounces of liquor or 250 calories not counting any mixer that you add. Just saying.

Good night all ! Have a lovely day tomorrow !
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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GRAINGRINDER's Photo GRAINGRINDER Posts: 9
6/26/14 2:29 P

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Hi (the other Brenda here)
I know Im new to the group but I have an adult child that is an alcoholic/drug addict :-( Oh boy all I can say it is devastating!! AA truly saved their life. They have been clean and sober for a few years now (Praise God) it is the hardest thing I've ever watched. (That includes losing a brother to suicide) It was the inspiration for the first 50 lbs after watching my own child fight off the demons of detox, depression, fear, loneliness, embarrassment on a daily basis and that is just a few. I figured it they could live there life daily without drugs& alcohol I could stay within the parameter of calories. Even writing this now gives me encouragement :-) One thing this journey has taught me it that one day at a time , sometimes I go hour by hour if I need to :-)

Well I am enjoying a beautiful start to summer here in Fla a lovely 90ish and sunny. I walked 1.5 miles yesterday. I know its not much but with my thyroid messed up thatís all I can seem to muster. I go to the reg doc tomorrow for thyroid I know ill have to wait a week for blood tests, I just want to feel normal again.
the other Brenda


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SASSISPRING's Photo SASSISPRING Posts: 10,785
6/26/14 1:02 P

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When I was in college, we had to pay a bootlegger for our booze, so we put our food money on alcohol. Vodka was low in calories and perfect over ice, especially when you realize we rarely ate a meal. We lost a ton of weight, but I do not recommend this as a weight loss program. There are too many other issues that come with it. But we were young and being in an atmosphere where alcohol is one of the five main food groups, we didn't really think through all the repressions. We were just too busy enjoying the ride. haha!



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CHRISTINE1623's Photo CHRISTINE1623 SparkPoints: (12,577)
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6/26/14 7:16 A

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As for me, I definitely have an "alcohol use disorder". Two of the four points apply to me. My tolerance has gone up a lot over the years and when I have a drink, I do NOT want to stop.
My "triggers" to want to drink have gone from a minimal few to several. I drink to relax, deal with social situations and sometimes because of boredom. When I drink I honestly feel way less up tight and bitchy! Which I realize is NOT a good thing. I need to learn to be these things without a substance.

I pray that that they never come up with an alcoholic beverage that has zero calories and carbs. I will be in big trouble!

No, I do not drink everyday. If I had to give an average, I would say twice a week. Alcohol is not a problem in my life; however, I definitely have a need to keep a close check on it. If I could wave a magic wand...I would be a non-drinker. One less thing to worry about.

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SASSISPRING's Photo SASSISPRING Posts: 10,785
6/26/14 1:59 A

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Val, I was not debating your alcohol use or how you view your drinking, as that is not mine to discuss. It would be disrespectful. To clarify, I shared that I respectfully disagreed with your definition of alcoholism and alcohol abuse. It appears that there was a misunderstanding. I read your post that while you don't agree with the writer's view that you are spiritually ill, you agree that addiction is strictly psychological. In other words, what I read in your post was that you shared addiction is not physical, it is simply an emotional spiritual emptiness. That's where I disagree as addiction and the addictive cycle are layers upon layers, involving much more than psychological. It appears from what you shared in this current post, that is what you were trying to say and I apologize for misunderstanding.


Edited by: SASSISPRING at: 6/26/2014 (12:54)

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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
6/26/14 12:09 A

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According to the medical community Alcoholism (which was formerly called alcohol dependence) is now currently called "alcohol use disorder". It involves a pattern of alcohol use leading to a number of problems including
l. tolerance
2. withdrawal
3. drinking more or for longer than intended
4. other life problems

According to this definition - I definitely have an "alcohol use disorder". I'm not in denial about that. My tolerance has certainly increased over the past 10 years that I've started drinking - no doubt. I remember when I would be "drunk" after one drink. Now I could drink a whole bottle of wine in an evening. I don't have withdrawal symptoms like the hard core alcoholics that I have known. They vomit in the morning. Shake when they don't have alcohol. My previous husband would actually have a SEIZURE if he went 24 hours without alcohol. He had severe DT's - was in the hospital hallucinating. On number 3 I know that If I have one glass of wine - I'll want to have another - until the bottle is gone so then I can't lose weight so I fail on that one. I don't seem to have any other "life problems" in that I don't drive after drinking, don't get violent, don't go out of the house, etc. But like I said, I agree that I fit this definition.

Veronica Valli in her book "Why you drink and How to Stop" defines alcoholism as having 3 parts
l. physical addiction
2. psychological craving and obsession
3. spiritual illness
I wrote that I really don't fit HER definition of alcoholism. I'm not physically addicted. I can go for long periods of time without drinking with only occasional urges to have a drink - that I can ignore. And I don't have a "spiritual illness" characterized by living in constant FEAR - mainly of "I'm not good enough, and therefore, I won't be loved".

I know I am loved by GOD - and by Johnny, and my MOM, and my two sons. I have a lot of love in my life. And I'm happy and I like myself. So I don't believe I have this "spiritual illness" she writes about.

Anyway - bottom line - I know I have an "alcohol use disorder" and I'm very open about that and working on that ALL the time. I'm completing 2 days alcohol-free - and feeling good. I was AF for 107 days so I know I can do it again. I really enjoy the taste of alcohol and the relaxing feeling I get - it's true. I don't like that it makes me gain weight.

How is everyone else in the alcohol-department? Do you drink on a daily basis? You know alcohol has LOTS of calories ! (7 calories per gram as opposed to only 4 calories for carbs and proteins. fats have 9 calories per gram.)

So, Bev, are we OKAY ?

Going to make myself a cup of hot tea and check the lottery numbers for tonight.
God Bless You All,
Valerie


Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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SASSISPRING's Photo SASSISPRING Posts: 10,785
6/25/14 2:49 A

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Good evening.

Val,we'll have to agree to disagree on addictions and what is/isn't an alcoholic. It's good you found supports through books and online. It's now your choice on how you'll choose to use those tools.

I really like the saying shared here, about how drinking robs one of tomorrow. That's such a true statement and I hope it inspires you Val, to keep on track. You can do this.

Christine, the walk sounded wonderful to do with your daughters. I really enjoyed the cancer walk with my niece (6) this past Friday. She rode her bike and I walked, it was really great.

No July 4th for me, it's July 1st here. I'm not doing anything special except enjoying my holidays. I'll be off work next week and might pop down to Quesnel to visit my friends. No idea yet, just playing it all by ear.

I hope you all have a good sleep and remember, tomorrow is a new day with new possibilities and beginnings. emoticon




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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
6/24/14 10:41 P

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That is so true, Elle ! Thanks ! Last night we drank a lot and today I had a hangover and spent most of the day in bed. Luckily I can do that if I want - but I hate to feel bad and waste the day. I'm going to remember that saying. Thanks again.

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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CAPECODBABE's Photo CAPECODBABE Posts: 5,384
6/24/14 6:53 P

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I saw this saying on another post today and thought of you. Val.

"Everytime you drink, you steal happiness from tomorrow".

Isn't that nice?


xoxo elle~


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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
6/24/14 12:21 P

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The "run/walk" sounded like a wonderful bonding experience for you and your girls. That is so awesome. I have to admit that I've never done one. I'm really proud of you for doing this !

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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CHRISTINE1623's Photo CHRISTINE1623 SparkPoints: (12,577)
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6/21/14 8:35 P

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This morning my 3 daughters and I ran the 5K Color Run. What an awesome event! My oldest 23, ran the whole thing. My youngest 13, ran almost all of it. My middle darling 21 and I half "fast" walked it and half ran it. It was so much fun and a great bonding experience!

After we got cleaned up, my mom had us over to celebrate my oldest daughters birthday a little early (she will be 24 on July 10). Mike and I got Liz a stainless steel microwave for her birthday. My mom got her a charcoal grill, a bag of charcoal and grilling utensils. Mike and I also gave her a semi-used portable fire pit we no longer use because Mike built us a permanent one. She was really happy and went home with a car load of stuff!

I will neglect to tell you how my eating habits have been for the past two days. Just assume that a tired lady in Michigan will be back on the band wagon 100% come tomorrow morning!

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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
6/19/14 11:36 P

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Good Evening Lovely Ladies !

Bev - you sound super busy with the Toastmasters, IDIDALAP for Cancer, National Aboriginal Day, a rock concert, and friends, etc. ! That's awesome that you have such a full life !

About the alcohol support group: I thought about going to AA but Johnny was really AGAINST the idea. He has been to many AA meetings and has a very negative view of the organization. He let me know that he really didn't want me to go to any meetings. Besides that, we haven't had a car in almost 6 years and I don't know how I would even get to a meeting. Sure I could probably call AA and ask for someone to pick me up - but if it would so upset Johnny, it wouldn't be worth the effort. Johnny is definitely an alcoholic - drinks beer every day all day. But I'm so proud of him that he hasn't touched hard liquor since that terrible tequila night in the middle of March.

I recently read the book "Why you drink and how to stop" by Veronica Valli and according to her definition, I'm not really an alcoholic. She is an addiction therapist in the UK and says that alcoholism is really a "spiritual illness" in which a person lives in constant fear that they are not "good enough" and feels like there is a "hole in their soul". I am a very happy Christian and not miserable like she described a true alcoholic. I just want to cut down on alcohol in order to lose weight.

Anyway, with Johnny drinking in front of me, it is difficult to NOT join him. But I was alcohol-free for 107 days over the holidays which was an accomplishment that I am proud of. Lost 14 pounds in that 3 1/2 months.

I was a member of the "Cutting Down the Booze" team but found that almost everyone on the team was drinking on a regular basis and it actually tempted me MORE to drink than helped me avoid alcohol.

I've also read Alan Carr's book and Jason Vale's book on quitting drinking and they were both helpful. I really like the website www.stopdrinkingalcohol.com
That has probably helped me the most.

I know I'm a strong person and I can do whatever I put my mind to. I didn't drink when I was young, graduated from college, worked as a Medical Technologist at the VA, and retired with a pension. It wasn't until I left my husband in 2003 and moved into a poor neighborhood where everyone was an alcoholic that I started drinking. It was a whole new lifestyle for me that I had never been exposed to before. I started partying for the first time in my life. I gained weight. I've been cutting back since Sept '12 when I joined SP. I lost over 40 pounds and now regained 10, which makes me mad at myself. Oh, well. I can lose it again. And I WILL !

About Johnny's back - he's still in pain but he says it's getting better. He has an apartment to paint and grass to cut so I hope he heals up quick.

Christine - thanks for the geography ! I grew up north of Milwaukee so it is probably similar to north of Detroit. idk

Well, I'm getting tired so I'm going to join Johnny in bed (he didn't like sleeping on the floor last night. Said he really missed sleeping with me. Although it helped his back)

Hope everybody is okay. Do you have plans for the 4th of July ?
Nite. Nite.
Valerie





Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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6/19/14 2:35 P

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Valerie, I live in the lower peninsula. Southeastern Michigan, about one hour north of Detroit. I will keep you in my prayers regarding your struggles with alcohol. I will also pray that Johnny's back is alright!

Sassispring, I enjoyed hearing about what you have going on. I hope you have an enjoyable summer!!



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SASSISPRING's Photo SASSISPRING Posts: 10,785
6/19/14 1:30 A

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Valerie, sounds like you and everyone who has posted has really been struggling with the weight. I don't hold much to weight because I can gain 2-20lbs in one week and lose it the next. One day we might actually figure out what is going on in my body and I have plan for my next doctor's visit. I'll see how it goes, hopefully adding in some specific tests might hold the key.

It also sounds like you were quite busy with the cleaning. As for the alcohol, do you have a support group that you can use to help keep you focused on staying alcohol free? Remember every day, every hour, every minute and even down to every second is one more step to staying on the right track.

I have been busy doing nothing. haha! My next round of vacation comes up in under 2 weeks and I'm gone for a week. Back to work for 3 weeks, then gone for 4 weeks. I can't wait.

Tomorrow our community is celebrating National Aboriginal Day early to accommodate the schools, however, there is a provincial teacher's strike, so that flew out the door. Every year the schools bring the children to the day and it's awesome - we've had up to 500 participants. The weather is terrific, we've blasted it everywhere, so we are hoping parents will make the trek up to the local reserve and celebrate the day. I will be assisting with First Aid and doing face painting. I've done face painting yearly since our agency started working with the local reserve to celebrate the day (which is officially on June 21st, throughout Canada).

Friday is "IDIDALAP for Cancer." I met my goal for the walk 3x, so was very thankful to all my friends and family that contributed. I will also create 2 luminaries for the walk. I walk at 10PM for a hour, but will probably go over for some time, after work. Our agency put in a team and we managed to sign up 12 people to cover the 12 hours of the walk. It's a local event and separate from the other walks for cancer. The money stays within the community to support the cancer wing at our little hospital and also goes out to Canadian Cancer Society for research support.

I am also a new member of Toastmasters International, as I started last Wed. I won the table top topic speech last Wed and I won again, this Wed. I am very humbled, as everyone does such excellent speeches. Next week I will host the Table Top Topics, so have to think up scenarios by next Wednesday for members to speak upon.

That's about it, my niece and nephew visit, we all visit up at Mum and Dad's, visited with a friend from out of town, and one in town. Went to a rock concert. But at the end of the day, it's been pretty quiet around here. Take care everyone.



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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
6/19/14 12:01 A

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It's true that your weight will fluctuate by a couple pounds every day. I think you should only weigh once per week hoping to see a 1 - 2 pounds drop each week. Faster than that is not recommended. I've been weighing more often - and I think I should take me own advice and start weighing only once per week. I think it would be less frustrating than seeing the daily fluctuations.

I'm not doing well on staying alcohol-free. In fact I've been drinking every evening. I know I can't lose any weight when I regularly consume alcohol. Once I start drinking, I don't want to stop. I lose my inhibitions. The only way for me to lose weight is to NOT START drinking alcohol. (At least I've learned this about myself. That's an important insight) I am committed to quitting drinking AGAIN ! I've done it before (for 107 days and lost 14 pounds) and I CAN DO IT AGAIN ! If you believe in prayer - - please pray for me !

Worked hard today. Neighbors moved out of their apartment and the landlords hired me to clean it up. It was REALLY DIRTY ! I couldn't believe the amount of garbage behind the stove and the stove itself was FILTHY ! I also worked very hard cleaning the refrigerator. Tomorrow I'm going to clean the oven. That will also be a big job. I'm proud of myself today that I accomplished so much and that the apartment looks SO MUCH BETTER ! That feels good. I hope they pay me adequately. They just give me whatever they feel appropriate. Johnny is supposed to paint the apartment but he hurt his back today moving their old-fashioned TV off the floor. Tonight he is sleeping on the hard living room floor to hopefully correct his back-pain. It will seem weird to sleep in the bed without him. I feel so bad for him that he is in pain. There is nothing I can do except give him Ibuprophen. I hope he feels better soon. He also needs to cut the grass (with a push mower) That is a big job as well. The landlord might have to give that job to someone else if Johnny's back doesn't heal up quick. The grass grows like crazy in Florida in the summertime.

Elle - How is your new job going? Glad you got out of the elderly home health care ?

Rubesgal - Are you going to Weight Watchers ? I wouldn't think you would need WW when SparkPeople is Free ! If it's FREE - it's for ME. LOL

Christine - I've never really been quite clear on the geography. Do you live in Upper Michigan or the Lower Main Part of the State ? My sister lives in Upper Wisconsin close to Upper Michigan. Just curious.

Alison - Did your daughter move to Houston? Did they rent a house or an apartment ? How are they doing? Will they attend Joel Osteen's church Lakewood in Houston ? We watch him every Sunday for 8 years now.

Anybody else "lurking"? Sunshine-Girl ? Frenchseams? Terrycal? Just-Brenda ? Anybody else? Please post. We miss you.

Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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6/17/14 7:58 P

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Hi Val,
I had just finished TOM the day before I weighed in, so I don't think it was hormones or water that put the weight on. I think I am going to ignore the scale for a while, let it build up some dust! I seem to do better if I don't weigh in so often. For example, yesterday I was up 2 pounds so I decided to eat what I wanted all day. Well, if my weight would have been down 2 pounds, I know I would have ate light/healthy all day. I know that doesn't make sense but does anyone else tend to do that?

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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
6/16/14 7:48 P

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Thanks Christine ! I appreciate that !

As for the weight gain, could it be your hormones making you retain water ? I know women can gain as much as 5 pounds in water weight when they are PMS ing. My hormones have been going crazy these last 2 months ! I have gained 10 pounds ! I actually bought a pregnancy test this morning! Fortunately it was negative. I guess I just have PMS or is it menopause ? My weight has gone up and down and back up again radically ! I even was alcohol-free for 41 days and I GAINED weight. This is very frustrating. But I'll never give up. I know I've eaten too many sweets and haven't been exercising much because of the heat. But mostly I think it is hormonal fluctuations.

Let's KEEP ON KEEPING ON ! Together WE CAN DO THIS !
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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6/16/14 5:33 P

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Welcome Rubesgal! Val's advice is great and you will find her to be an inspiring, supportive and motivational leader!

As for me...I've been trying to break this month long plateau. Got on the scale this morning, feeling pretty good...UP two pounds! Ugh...come on?! Well, such is life. Took today off from diet and exercise and will start new tomorrow.



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GREEN-EYED-LADY's Photo GREEN-EYED-LADY Posts: 1,039
6/16/14 10:46 A

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I was thinking about the best advice for someone who is just starting out with SparkPeople. Where should they begin ? I think that first you have to track just "What" you're eating (AND DRINKING) and also "when" and "where" you are consuming calories. Then you can identify exactly what your problem areas are. Are you mindlessly snacking in front of the TV or computer in the evening ? Are you getting any exercise? Are you consuming a lot of alcohol calories ? (This was my problem) Are you just eating a lot of fast-food junk ?

When you've figured out what you need to work on, then you can set up a few simple steps to correct the situation. I believe in the KISS principle: keep it simple sweetie. This is not "rocket science". If you're not exercising at all - start out with a short walk and gradually increase the distance. If you're eating out - try cooking with whole natural foods at home more. (I love to cook) If you're drinking too much, check out the website www.stopdrinkingalcohol.com
If you're snacking a lot - try sunflower seeds in the shell. They are so much "work" to eat that you simply can't eat too many - and they're good for you.
You get the idea.

Well that's my best advice for someone new.
What do you suggest to a newbie ?
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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6/16/14 10:27 A

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Happy to have a new member join us - RUBESGAL. Care to share your real name ? You don't have to if you don't want to. Here are real names of some of our other members:
Capecodbabe - Elle in CapeCod, Mass
Frenchseams - Lisa in California
SunshineGirl - Denise in France
Sassi-Spring - Bev in Canada
Green-Eyed-Lady - Valerie in Florida
And the others are obvious:
Just_Brenda in Canada
Christine in Michigan
Terrycal1 sorry not sure where she lives
AlisonChristian in Arkansas
I hope I didn't miss anybody
We haven't heard from most of them in a while. Hope to hear from everybody soon. How are you all doing ? Thanks to Christine, Alison, and Elle for keeping touch !
Valerie

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill and control you.
-- Paul in Ephesians 5:18 (NLT)


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6/16/14 9:26 A

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Inner struggle to get this diet started. I will lose weight by next week though!

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