Gotta be honest - life is really poopy right now. In fact - things haven't been great for a while. I've taken on too much with work - all of my work - 4 jobs - and I'm about to step into 4 months of incredible high pressure. I'm NOT looking forward to January 1st. My life just won't be my own until the end of April. And I actually AGREED to this. It's too late to back out of anything now, I'm signed up, and the fallout from backing out of any of these projects at this point would negatively affect my career and my reputation. So I'm stuck. And it's making me sick with worry and stress already. I'm afraid I'm going to let things fall through the cracks and that's on the professional side of things. What the hell am I going to do about ME falling through the cracks? Time for food planning and exercising and having precious moments to myself?
Today, an event that it very dear to me and I've been looking forward to for months has come under fire from a BUNCH of negative people and protesters. And I'm devastated. I'm trying not to take these things personally, but I can't help but feel terrible about all of this and like I'm under personal attack. I just want to go home, curl up in my bed and hide for a month. I want to drop off the map for a while. And cry. Crying will likely happen a lot tonight.
Anyway - just venting. It sucks. I just don't know how to separate my public life from my personal life. I've always just "bucked up and taken it like a champ" - but I'm vulnerable and I hurt, and unless I can allow myself to be down, I will eat my stress. And that's the WORST possible outcome.
"It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not" ~Anonymous
"It is never too late to be what you might have been." ~George Elliot
| Pounds lost: 105.8