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DarthLaurie, do you read the Dances With Fat blog? I think it'd be relevant to your interests.
Kak lyoblyo ya vas, kak bioos ya vas. Znat yvidel vas, ya v nedobri chas.
MRS_4_EVER_AFTER, I don't think I made it clear in my first post that the point of this activity is to get other people to the place where you already are. The idea is not to think that you will actually be thin - it's to make a list of things that you've been putting off until you're thin, and then find ways to do those things anyway. It's great that you have been able to do this very thing. You're an inspiration to those of us who are still working on it!
To the OP,
I like the premise of this idea, however I never plan on being *thin* again. I came to that conclusion many months ago and found it freeing- in part thanks to HAES.
Instead I starting living my life for the moment more than a year ago. If there is something I thought I had to wait for a skinnier day, I went out and did it anyway. I wasted too many years waiting to be that perfect person and I lost a major part of who I was.
Basically, I know that if there is something out there that I want to do or be apart of, I just do it. It's very freeing!
There's this lovely story my therapist gave my mom when we were in therapy (I was in therapy to figure out how to cope with my mom's mental illness, I guess). The book is called The Silver Boat. It's a short children's story about freeing oneself from bad situations. The main gist of the story is to face your fears so you can get what you want most. I think that the conversation you'll have with the person at the skydiving place won't be anything close to the thing you're envisioning it will be. ;) You can do it!
Thanks for doing all this research! I am at 233 right now, unclothed. The local skydiving place takes up to 250, but over 220 is an additional charge. I'm not only above the limit, but I am also very short, so I will just have to get up the nerve to call them and have an honest conversation with a complete stranger about my height/weight. Yeah. I admit it, I'm not quite there yet.
I think I've found a reason for the weight limit and it makes sense to me...I think that one of the major issues may be strength and agility as well as fitting into a harness:
What if I am over the weight limit?
The weight limit is 220#, but:
Heavier passengers make a Tandem master's day a lot harder, and in the long run will increase maintenance on equipment (which we are very careful to repair and replace regularly). We can take Tandems over 220# by special arrangement.
Below are the overweight surcharges if, wearing shoes, shirt and pants, you weigh:
220# or less- regular price
220# - 230#- add $35/ jump
230# - 240#- add $70/ jump
240# - 250#- add $105/ jump
250# - 260#- add $140/ jump
260# - 270#- add $175/ jump
270# - 280#- add $210/ jump*
280# - * add $245/ jump*
*We can usually take up to 280-285 pounds (about 125kg) jumper's weight on a tandem skydive with the above overweight fees. Our weight capability varies with our tandem instructor availability since it depends on their weight too, so ask us and we'll see what we can do as we will not exceed the equipment's rated weight limits. In any case, this assumes you are in reasonable physical condition and proportions. We reserve judgment to elect not to take anyone if we think there is a safety compromise based on the jumpmaster's assessment. Please tell us when scheduling anyone over 220# so we can plan accordingly. Above weights are without gear, with clothing. We might need to ask you to demonstrate an adequate level of strength and agility if you are over 50 years old. We also need you to be reasonably proportioned; for example, someone who is 5'1" tall and weighs 230 pounds would not be able to jump because they are too short and wide to assure a proper harness fit.
If you are a big person over the usual tandem skydiving weight limits, our maximum tandem student weight limit for skydiving might be high enough so we can arrange to accommodate your higher weight limit skydive tandem. The maximum you can weight and still skydive can't be exceeded, but we can help by pairing you with one of our lighter tandem skydiving experts with the necessary skills to take heavier skydiving students than many other skydiving Drop Zones.
Similar situation here. If you weigh:
220# or less- regular price
220# - 230#- add $35/ jump
230# - 240#- add $70/ jump
For AFF we can take up to 240# jumper's weight plus gear, we cannot accommodate anyone heavier. In any case, this assumes you are in reasonable physical condition and proportions. We reserve judgment to elect not to take anyone if we think there is a safety compromise. Please tell us when scheduling anyone over 220# so we can plan accordingly. Above weights are without gear.
I know that's just one place, but they address the question is a perfectly reasonable way. Let us know if you end up jumping out of a perfectly good plane!
Just wanted to follow-up and say that today's Living Social coupon for Nashville is for sky diving. I did some research and they do have a weight limit. I am just under it, now. I'm going to give some thought to buying the coupon, but I'd like to see if there is somewhere without a weight limit.
What a great question! I hope you bring more of these up!
1. When I'm thin I'll like myself better.
2. When I'm thin I won't be in pain anymore.
3. When I'm thin I'll be a better dancer.
4. When I'm thin I'll be able to find costumes that fit off the rack.
5. When I'm thin my bf will find me desirable again.
1. It's simply not true. I despised myself at 115 lbs. I hated everything about myself. Size has no bearing on how I feel about myself. I have to live in this body so I better learn to be my own best friend.
2. This one might be debatable. Some physical pain *may* diminish, but certainly not all and it won't do a thing for emotional pain ;)
3. Size doesn't make a person a better dancer. Practice makes a better dancer! There are some moves that look better on me than slimmer dancers...like my shimmies.
4. I might have my choice of costumes at a smaller size, but virtually every costume requires altering... even the custom made ones. It's much easier to make your own costume and alter before adding the bling.
5. My bf and I have been together for seven years. He's 51 and he has very little libido (the doctor ran a test). He shows affection for me other ways.
Thanks so much for posting this!
Wow. I haven't read HAES yet, but I am totally intrigued by this question. I love your answers.
I've taken some big strides in this direction already- but I have one that I keep waiting until I lose weight to do...
I desperately want to jump out of a perfectly good plane, but I do not want to worry that I am too heavy for the parachute (terrifying) or that I will end up as a fat girl parachuting on YouTube (like I'd ever know since I don't watch that sort of thing.)
Step One: Call local sky diving place and just ASK them if there is a weight limit.
So I've got my trusty copy of the Health at Every Size book here, and one exercise is as follows:
Fill in the blank with your fantasies: When I'm thin, ____________. Then think about what you can do to go after that goal directly, instead of believing you need to lose weight before you can go for it.
1. I'll be able to find clothes that fit.
2. I'll get cast in plays and musicals.
3. My husband won't question my eating habits.
4. I'll like how I look in pictures.
Here's how I can go after those things:
1. I've got a sewing machine, a natural talent for draping fabric, and years of watching my mom make clothes to fit my very unusually shaped (at any size) body. So I need to start using all of that. I also know of an excellent and affordable tailor; I can buy things too big and have them taken in. Furthermore, I can keep an eye out for things that already fit me and make sure to focus on buying those. (I've considered starting a blog for ladies with my problem: being short and round - too petite for women's sizes; too big around for petite sizes; and wanting things that are pretty and not frumpy!)
2. I'm taking voice lessons, and as I build up my endurance and my schedule changes, I'll resume dance lessons. ALSO, you can't get cast in plays you don't audition for, so I need to stop pretending I'm not getting cast because of my appearance and realize that no one gets cast who doesn't audition!
3. This is tough and also not true. Thin or no, if I'm not honoring my body with my food choices, my husband is going to call me on it. He's actually been much more gentle about it over the past several months (he was never harsh, but he was very quick to suggest that any problems I might have were based on poor dietary choices, even if I felt that wasn't the case). I need to honor my body and give it the fuel it needs to function; when I do this, and as I talk to him about my feelings, all will be well on this front.
4. This is another toughie. I'm learning though. Many of my displeasures from photos are because they are posed, or the clothes I'm wearing don't photograph well, or they aren't posed and I have bad posture. So I'm trying to maintain better posture generally, and I've actually asked people NOT to warn me when they're about to photograph me, because action/candid photos always please me more than posed ones do.
How can you get to your goals in the body you have?