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IKACEY's Photo IKACEY Posts: 2,579
3/23/13 1:20 A

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Good chucklers Carolyn. Good for grumpies about more things than diets, like not being able to eat food at all right now emoticon

"Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it"

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt

"Taking ACTION is the ultimate power of Motivation. Nothing beats it, period."
Edgar Ng

"Some people quit due to slow progress, never grasping the fact that.......slow progress.....is progress."




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FLEMIDG's Photo FLEMIDG Posts: 35,434
3/11/13 11:47 P

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Thanks for making me smile.

Darlene

I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills. From whence commeth my help? My help commeth from the Lord who made heaven and earth. flemidg


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BECKYSRN's Photo BECKYSRN SparkPoints: (59,204)
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3/11/13 7:47 P

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emoticon

Blessed be.
Becky

May I deal with honour, may I act with courage, may I achieve humility.--Dick Francis

And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye.
--Antoine de Saint-Exupery



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JUNEBUG4967's Photo JUNEBUG4967 SparkPoints: (45,168)
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3/11/13 6:58 P

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Chuckle, chuckle!

When all your desires are distilled, you will cast just two votes: to love more and to be happy.

Hafiz

Do not allow anyone to cause you to doubt your ability to succeed. Ernest Holmes

Including yourself. Pam Young



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JUDSTERF's Photo JUDSTERF Posts: 3,401
3/11/13 6:04 P

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A few jokes never hurt anyone! Thanks for sharing!



One Day At A Time Dear Jesus!!!

Not looking at how many # to go but back and how many #s I've already lost!!!




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BEVIEG41's Photo BEVIEG41 SparkPoints: (44,772)
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3/11/13 4:08 P

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Whitney-Teacher - Can you see my smile emoticon . I also remember a diet joke, "If a doctor wanted me to touch my toes, he would throw diamonds on the floor". Thanks for the levity, made my day. Bev


Bev rom Sacramento CA West Coast Time zone


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LADYBUGSY's Photo LADYBUGSY Posts: 241
3/11/13 1:33 P

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Cute jokes! They put a smile on my face. Thanks.

Lesley
Emmaus PA
WHITNEYTEACHER's Photo WHITNEYTEACHER Posts: 4,280
3/11/13 12:27 P

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OK everyone,
I started out the day in a real diet (excuse me, “lifestyle change”), exercise funk. I feel like I’m going nowhere fast and am getting frustrated! Daylight Savings Time is making me grumpy! I even wrote my blog today about it. Since I prefer to be a positive person all this negativity was only making me grumpier – can you see the beginnings of a cycle here? So I decided to look online for some weight loss jokes, hoping I could cheer myself up a little. I’m not sure my “grump” is completely gone but a few chuckles didn’t hurt so I decided to share a few. Feel free to add more, I think we all need to step back, regroup and laugh at ourselves from time to time. Here are a few that made me laugh:

GOOD NEWS: Bacon is found to be good for you.
BAD NEWS: Only if it is boiled.

DIET PILLS
"I'm prescribing these pills for you," said the doctor to the overweight patient, who tipped the scales at about three hundred pounds. "I don't want you to swallow them. Just spill them on the floor twice a day and pick them up, one at a time...."

YOU KNOW IT’S TIME TO DIET AND EXERCISE WHEN......
You try to do a few push ups and discover that certain body parts refuse to leave the floor....

I don't exercise at all. If God had wanted me to touch my toes
He would have put them up higher on my body.

Aerobics: a series of strenuous exercises which help convert fats, sugars, and starches into aches, pains, and cramps.

If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise.

I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

You know that you’re out of shape when you can’t pull supermarket shopping carts apart

I prefer sit-ups to jumping jacks. At least I get to lie down after each one

Calories (noun); Tiny creatures that live in your closet and sew your clothes a little bit tighter every night


My name is Carolyn
(Whitney is my last name, I'm a retired high school biology teacher = WHITNEYTEACHER)

I moved to Grants Pass, a small town in Southern Oregon in January, 2014.




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