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MENDEZM2's Photo MENDEZM2 Posts: 78
4/3/07 7:30 P

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You need a license or a permit for almost everything...but not to have children.

 
BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
4/3/07 11:26 A

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That is just not fair to these kids who need this education for the rest of their lives. They will be caught in the cycle like a lot of their family have been in and can't get out of it.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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PEACEB2U's Photo PEACEB2U Posts: 470
4/2/07 9:52 A

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In my district we had a young boy falling asleep during class on a regular basis. After doing some investigation we discovered that his single mother was working the third shift at her workplace leaving the boy at home to care for his younger brother who has a severe case of MS. This boy was afraid to go to sleep for fear that something would happen to his brother causing him to die.

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DENISESP5's Photo DENISESP5 Posts: 174
4/2/07 7:22 A

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I think we have kids raising kids, and I don't mean just when they are school age. I have two incidents where two of my students are taking care of their baby brothers/sisters at night. These boys are coming to school dead tired because mom and/or stepdad put the baby to bed with them. They are getting up in the middle of the night to change a diaper and get their baby sibling a bottle. No wonder they fall asleep in class or have trouble learning. Sad but true!!!

Edited by: DENISESP5 at: 4/2/2007 (18:08)
You get what you give so always give your best.


 
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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
4/1/07 10:30 P

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Will the cycle stop? That is the scary part.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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LADYTIMEDRAMON's Photo LADYTIMEDRAMON Posts: 534
4/1/07 9:32 P

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One thing I've noticed... in many cases, each generation seems to be "rebelling" against the previous. Each generation of parents does not want to do what their parents did. I know my grandfather was a totalitarian. He used the strap and fear. My mother has emotional scars, but she never physically struck me or my sibs. However, my sibs and I still showed respect because it was expected and demanded. I don't have children. My sister has 2 stepdaughters, but no relationship. My brother has 2 children. When his son was younger, my brother treated him as "his buddy". By the time he was 5, there were seeds of "bully" showing. Thankfully he straightened out, but now, my brother is having a lot of problems with his daughter, who is very spoiled.

If/when I have children of my own (and after teaching 8 years, I don't know if I really want any), at least I know what NOT to do.

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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
4/1/07 1:13 A

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We had a field trip downtown at the beginning of the week and had 1 parent show up to help us out. I wish that that parent didn't show up at all. Her child was standing in up in the front of the bus, with her next to him, and putting his hands out of the window. She didn't do anything to correct him. Also when we got off the bus at school, I took my class over to the restroom. Guess who was now were to be found, yes you guessed it! His mother had taken him somewhere else on campus. Than she told me that she had also signed him out for the rest of the day. This is the kid who won't do any writing in my classroom. His father is the one who said that he didn't write when he was a kid and to "look at what I do", he use to be a truck driver and now answers phones for American Express. Apple and apple tree story there big time.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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MENDEZM2's Photo MENDEZM2 Posts: 78
3/31/07 1:19 P

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Ladytimedramon - you make a good point! My most successful students seem to be those whose parents are just that - parents. The rest are more interested in being their kids' friends. Why? Because they feel that their children will be more honest and talk to them as they would their friends if they're less parental!! Newsflash: it doesn't work! What ends up happening is their kids take TOTAL advantage of them and treat them with NO respect. I've been on field trips where kids have been so rude to their parents who volunteered that I've had to step in and tell them it's unacceptable - because their parents just sit there and take it! I had a mom say to me, "How do you get her to talk to you with so much respect?" I told her, "She doesn't have a choice. If she spoke to me the ways she just spoke to you she'd be writing paragraphs about respect for the next 2 days! No music, no gym, no computers, no recess - just paragraphs." Isn't that a lesson we all learned BEFORE we went to school?? I learned my lesson when I was 6 and told my mother to shut up. She slapped my face. First time. I didn't talk back to her until I was 11. Then she raised her hand to me and I RAN! I didn't go home for HOURS. I am NOT saying people need to slap their kids - it was a different time back then. But I cannot believe society has gotten to where there is a NEED for "Super nanny"!! What did parents do before television and Dr. Phil?? LOL!

 
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MOMUSHAMU's Photo MOMUSHAMU Posts: 315
3/31/07 12:11 P

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I have high school students that don't brush their teeth on a daily basis. When we have small group sometimes all I can do is gag from the smell of bad breath. Although some of it is pure poor hygiene, but at the Alternative High School, I am sure most of it is because of the drugs. These students are not ashamed to let you know that they are users emoticon

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LADYTIMEDRAMON's Photo LADYTIMEDRAMON Posts: 534
3/31/07 10:54 A

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And people wonder why Supernanny and Nanny 911 have become so big...

I see a lot of my parents who need their help.

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DENISESP5's Photo DENISESP5 Posts: 174
3/31/07 9:38 A

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I hear you Mendezm2. I am the school counselor, but also have to fill in as assistant principal. Two roles that aren't suppose to work well together. I guess I'm more the principal than the counselor. After all, I'm the one that the teachers call when they have problems with their students. Some days I am just worn out with these kids who think that they have options when it comes to following rules. Rules aren't optional!!! I don't know how many parents I have had to help to get their children out of the cars and into the classrooms. Red flag...you mean you can't control your 5, 6, or 7 year old. One mom said just this past week, "I stopped by the police station and was going to get them to bring him to school, but I couldn't figure which door to go in!" NOW, WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE!!! We got him to the classroom, and the mother hung around and cried. I told her to go home....he'll be fine, and asked her if she never had to do something she didn't want to? Dumb de dumb dumb....dumb!!! I guess I'm labeled the mean counselor.

You get what you give so always give your best.


 
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MENDEZM2's Photo MENDEZM2 Posts: 78
3/30/07 10:34 P

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Thanks, BOODADDY! But seriously, she's 5 - can you imagine what she'll be like at 10? 12? 16?

 
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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/30/07 8:45 P

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MENDEZM2-- Great story. Good for you on doing that will the kid.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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MENDEZM2's Photo MENDEZM2 Posts: 78
3/30/07 3:19 P

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When did kids start getting these choices and options for not doing what is expected of them?? I remember when I was in school - the teacher was ALWAYS right. And when the teacher was wrong, I NEVER heard about it. I've never had a student who just sat there during a test or any assignment and didn't even get their name on it. I'm pretty sure it never occurred to any of them. Admittedly, I was branded the "mean teacher"; I was the most structured and because of that, you can imagine the kids that were placed in my room. I've had some SEVERELY ADHD kids, autistic kids, LD, EI, everything and they never had the CHOICE to do anything else but what was expected of them. They did it, maybe it was during recess or after school and yes even once I went to their house and administered the test at their kitchen table, but it got done!
Several weeks ago I was walking through the building and there was a 1/2 day Kinder who was lying on the floor and refused to get up. She was refusing to go to day care. There were FOUR teachers, 2 parent volunteers and the principal all trying to talk this 5 year old into day care (which she has been to before several times). She ended up going into the principal's office with her to watch a video and have popcorn (way to reinforce the behavoir)! Two weeks later, the SAME little girl is refusing to follow the line down to day care and won't budge. Again, there are several adults trying to coax her into following the teacher. I walked up to her and asked her, "Is that your class? Is that your coat and bag?" She replied it was and I said, "Pick them up! Come on, I'll get your bag. Let's go!" And I started to walk away with her stuff. She started to follow me and eventually ran to catch up. I asked her about her day and she rattled off the stories she read and what they had for snack. When I was walking back the principal came out and thanked me. I told her it was all very simple, she simply realized she didn't have a choice. Lying on the floor spread eagle was NOT a choice! Now this little girl comes running for hugs whenever I see her and I always give her a wave when she's going to day care. When did they start believing they don't have to comply????

 
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STEALTHBMBSHLL's Photo STEALTHBMBSHLL Posts: 2,900
3/30/07 12:21 P

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I have a ODD kid who won't do his work if he THINKS he can't. If it isn't gonna be perfect, then he won't attempt it. I have to give him zeros, and he's a smart kid.
But now he has learned to use his ODD as a weapon against me...if he doesn't feel like doing something, he knows that all he has to do is ask to go see his counselor, or not do his work...then the therapist will take him down to their room and play bingo with him and give him candy.
GRRRR

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DHEIL77's Photo DHEIL77 Posts: 743
3/30/07 10:56 A

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I had a student who took a 20 question reading test yesterday (which I reviewed with the class the previous day) and after one hour she had done nothing--not even put her name on the paper. I just collected it, but her name on it and gave it a zero. It seems that if things take the slightest bit of effort, the students are not willing to do it!







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SIDMARURO Posts: 4
3/29/07 9:54 P

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You know, most of us are in that most difficult time of year when we are approaching state mandated tests. We are sick of the kids and sick of school. But in the big picture - if I look at my group of students as a whole; the majority are good kids. We continually put them in a high pressure situation to pass a high stakes test that is developmentally innappropriate. Reading is no longer done for the joy of reading, it is to answer 10 to 15 questions. No wonder they are checking out. I am a dyslexia specialist and I work with those kids who every day is a brand new day - and all the things we talked about the day before were forgotten. I just keep plugging away. Unfortunately - I think school districts are going to lose some very valuable teachers based on the pressure and even more papework that comes with No Child Behind. Hang in there everyone. We really do make a difference.

BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/29/07 9:11 P

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Apple and apple tree on the conferences. Got to love it. Sad to see that happening with students. The parents have excuses and use them in front of their children. I would think that some parents would like their kids to be better than they are. I have had parents who said, "Look at me, I didn't like to write and I am doing alright?" I do look at them and hope for better for their child. I know that I would like my daughter to better in school and life than I am doing.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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LADYTIMEDRAMON's Photo LADYTIMEDRAMON Posts: 534
3/29/07 8:26 P

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I wish I had even that much on the one whose mom said "he does what he's interested in". Mine just wants to "play". Hopefully he's still in ISS tomorrow during the test, otherwise he's testing in the career and education teacher's room.

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MENDEZM2's Photo MENDEZM2 Posts: 78
3/29/07 8:15 P

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In response to kids only doing enough work to get by or not at all. Much responsibility must lie with parents. Kids are kids and they have their own personalities, but I've seen some kids that I can't figure out and when mom and dad show up...it all makes sense. My friend teaches gifted/talented in OH and relayed a story to me recently about one of her students who is failing spelling. He does well in what interests him, but ignores what doesn't. So they had PT conferences and she brings up spelling. The dad replies, "Why does he need to worry about spelling? When he grows up he'll have a secretary to do that for him anyway."

 
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TEACHTLC's Photo TEACHTLC SparkPoints: (24,405)
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3/29/07 2:55 P

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Only 8 more Friday's for me, including tomorrow.

~Tracy~
"Dedication, determination, and keep your eyes on the prize."



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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/28/07 9:42 P

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What is happening to our society with only going half way or not caring?

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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LADYTIMEDRAMON's Photo LADYTIMEDRAMON Posts: 534
3/27/07 11:18 P

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You know, it's the same in college too. My friend is a teacher assistant at the local college in animation. She teaches a class. This is her first year. A lot of what she tells me, I told her I've seen it the last 2-3 years in elementary/middle school.

I'm at the point where we really only have 1 six weeks left. If they want to pass the class, it's up to them. Thankfully projects balance out the test scores, and I rarely grade a project at lower than a 70 (though projects count for 2 grades - project, and classwork). "Class Participation" helps too (and if they don't act out or make me crazy, they generally get a hundred on that - class participation grades have made the difference in pass or fail in a few).

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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/27/07 11:04 P

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That is the end of the year "fun" time. I totally agree with you. My class was doing the solar system and took notes together. They were to take those notes, when I gave them 2 1/2 weeks to work on, in their solar system book and rewrite them. The book was 1 grade and a test from our notes was another grade. I had students not finish the book so they failed the test. It was one of the easiest tests they could do since I told them what page and how the test was being set up. Once student could only list the planets. That was 8 out of 45 points. he couldn't even put down the length of 1 earth year or 1 earth day to get at least 2 more points. Got to love students. Right?

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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LADYTIMEDRAMON's Photo LADYTIMEDRAMON Posts: 534
3/27/07 9:58 P

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He didn't even try to make a picture or pattern.

But I give up. I am NOT making a review sheet for them this next test Friday. If they're not going to use it, I'm not going to waste time with it. We're doing some "diagrams" in Inspiration, they're going to print them out, and study from that. I don't even think I want to do Review Jeopardy with them. At this point, if they don't want to put in the effort, I don't either....

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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/27/07 9:47 P

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Proud of him for getting the bubbles filled in. Did he make a nice picture with the bubble sheet at least? emoticon

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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LADYTIMEDRAMON's Photo LADYTIMEDRAMON Posts: 534
3/26/07 11:07 P

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My "favorite student" (the one whose mom said "My son doesn't think the way other people do") took a makeup test today. I don't think he even opened test pages (I gave them a packet and a bubble sheet). He handed me the test and I looked at the true/false section, which said "A for true, B for false" and he had C and D marked in that section. I handed it back to him and suggested he fix it. He did, but again, he didn't read the test. He scored a 35.

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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/26/07 10:19 P

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I think I know of students who would only have 1 bubble in and the would make their own to get the answer right. I agree that the teacher could be telling the students the answers, but they wouldn't get them correct. Have had students use their notes on test and still fail them. They were just to lazy to look up the answers. Grading tests on the fill in the blanks make for an enjoyable evening of laughing in our family.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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DENISESP5's Photo DENISESP5 Posts: 174
3/26/07 8:00 P

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As far as students paying attention...some never will!! I had to laugh....the state is so worried that we are going to cheat on the state-mandated tests. I said that a teacher could stand in front of the room and give out each answer and we'd still have student who would fail!!! Some students aren't going to listen...period!!!

You get what you give so always give your best.


 
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TEACHTLC's Photo TEACHTLC SparkPoints: (24,405)
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3/26/07 2:53 P

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This year I have implemented a policy that if the students don't do their work throughout the week then they don't do the fun lab or project on Friday. I have significantly cut down on the number of missing assignments. Next year I need to implement a reward for all of the students that do well on tests. Maybe if they get an A on the test they don't have to do the next chapter's vocab?? It won't motivate every student, but perhaps a small percentage will take the challenge and study. We'll see.

~Tracy~
"Dedication, determination, and keep your eyes on the prize."



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LADYTIMEDRAMON's Photo LADYTIMEDRAMON Posts: 534
3/24/07 10:17 A

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On student "retention": The kids don't retain anything they do any more. I see this with kids who I taught in math and science last year, who passed TAKS, who are in tutoring going over EXACTLY what I tutored them in last year, which they had learned and were able to handle.

On "review sheets": I find I have to do this in my classroom. My students don't pay attention to the "book" sections of our lessons. They're only interested in the "activity" sections, when we're working on the programs. So I take the test, then make the review sheet. They do the review sheet from their textbooks, then we check it, and they correct it. I tell them EXPLICITLY that ALL the answers on the test are on this review sheet. I give them 10 minutes to study before the test. So far, I've graded Friday's tests for 2 classes out of 4. I have a handful of 90's. No 100s. Several failing. You could spoonfeed them the answers and they'd still fail. I once gave a test open book and they still failed.

The kids don't care. The only ones who do care are the ones who study, the ones who don't care, no matter how much you try.

This is the sad part. I spoke to one mom who said "I can tell my son to study, but it doesn't mean he'll do it. My son doesn't think like other people." Note that this kid is NOT special ed.

Oh yes... forgot to mention... in computers, our final exam is not on how to use the programs - it's on all the boring book stuff that the kids tune out.

Edited by: LADYTIMEDRAMON at: 3/24/2007 (10:18)
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NORACHARLESTOO Posts: 183
3/24/07 9:23 A

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I looked at this because it was Smelly Students but I see the discussion has gone to inept teaching...study guides that teach students to spit out the facts. All this is the cause, I think, of the students retaining Nothing. I have a lot of students who never should be in third grade. They learned facts for the moment and did not really learn anything. I AM NOT SAYING I AM WONDERFUL but there are a lot of people in my school who should not be in teaching.
Nora

P.S. Sorry to rant about this but it makes me so mad. I hear people Screaming at kids and I look and see a little kindergarten child being berated. It is so awful I could cry.

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KTTYERWG Posts: 759
3/24/07 9:21 A

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We have teachers like the one you describe at our school. There are two of them. They actually do use old yellow overhead and I have seen some of their worksheets and they were made out of that purple ink thing that rolls the sheet through and makes copies. It is sad. They won't retire because they need the medical benefits so they just keep giving the kids the same stuff year after year after year. But I think part of the kids' response has to be linked to the lack of value our society places on education. They see all these "famous" people everywhere that dropped out of school and are making tons of money. Or you try to tell them that education matters when they see their cousins or brothers or sisters riding around in a $50,000 vehicle with gold chains around their necks and $2,000 in their pockets. And many of the parents now don't value it either. I have had parents tell me that why should they make their kid come to school? They never finished school and they are doing just fine. How do you argue with that?

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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/23/07 7:57 P

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This is my 5th year and like we have been talking about they just don't care. I think that a lot of these kids have had teachers who haven't cared or really pushed them before. I know of a 4th grade teacher's social studies test where she makes a copy of the test with the notes for the kids and that is their study guide. Why learn the facts when you can just throw them back up on a test from a study sheet. That teacher should have retired many, many moons ago. One of my teammates is having to move to another school because they are getting rid of his position. That 4th grade teacher could just retire, like she keeps talking about every year and doesn't, so he can keep his job at our school. He does a lot more for the students and school than she does right now. Sorry about going on and on about that. Hope the rest of your year runs better for you and remember that as teachers we may not see the result of our work for many, many years, but we do make a difference for these kids! emoticon

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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DHEIL77's Photo DHEIL77 Posts: 743
3/23/07 7:12 P

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Yeah, it doesn't make sense to test what they supposedly learned by the end of year when it isn't the end of the year! A lot can happen in 8 weeks. It seems as if most of my students were "checked out" begore we even started, but I know it will only get worse. This is one of the hardest classes I've ever taught. I've only taught 7 years, and I'm sure I'll have harder yet to come, but they are so much needier than any of my previous classes.







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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/23/07 4:05 P

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I don't give up on the, but it sure seems like they give up on themselves or their parents/guardians do. I dread the time after our state testing since the students start checking out mentally. Our state testing is the 1st full week of April and we are in school until the end of May. Really nice of the state of AZ to have us cram all of the 9 months into 7 months of teaching. could at least have the test the beginning of May to give the teachers some time to finis a greater portion of the curriculum the would like us to teach. That might help out the test scores. What do I know?

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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DHEIL77's Photo DHEIL77 Posts: 743
3/23/07 2:47 P

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I have the same response! I either tell them to do better in the first place or do better from now on, but it never seems to happen. But yet, you never want to give up on any of them. The day I give up on them should be the day I retire.







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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/23/07 11:40 A

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It is funny how at the end they always ask, "What can I do for extra credit to bring up my grade?" I always tell them that they should have been doing the work in the first place that I don't really do extra credit.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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DHEIL77's Photo DHEIL77 Posts: 743
3/23/07 11:33 A

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Yes, my students only seem to care about their grades the week before grades come out. Then i have a line of students around my desk after school asking, "What are my grades?" "What am I missing?" *AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!*

I do agree that some is parents do too much for the kids some times. My kids seem to feel that the world owes them something, and I better provide them with entertainment, or I don't deserve their attention. I try to make my lessons as exciting as possible, but I can't compete with TV and video games.







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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/23/07 12:43 A

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I have one student's parent said that if he can't do very well on something he doesn't try. He is afraid of not being the best. So he just sits there and bangs his head with his fist when he should write a paper. I know his teacher from last year and his dad told him, in front of the student, that he didn't write in school and look how he got along without it. Good job DAD! Thanks for the support there. I do daily assignment sheets for him, while the rest is on weekly calendars they keep up themselves, and he still doesn't turn in everything. That is fine with me since he makes his own grades. I like those students who say, "Why did you GIVE me that grade?" and I tell them, "I don't give you your grade, you earn it!" Some of the students will be suprised on their report cards the beginning of April, or shouldn't be with the lack of effort they have put in this last quarter. Ok, off of my soapbox for right now.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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3/22/07 10:52 P

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I agree that some of the work ethic problem among students may be due to parents, but not totally. I am a parent who encourages risk taking, rewards effort, etc. But my 3rd grade daughter is really trying my patience lately. She is extremely bright, and in fact is in the gifted and talented program. But she seems to have developed a poor work ethic lately.

Progress reports came home yesterday and she had a C. She went from a straight A student to an A-B student, and now to a C. She doesn't complete class work or doesn't turn it in. She continually brings home papers with points off for turning them in late.

This morning I found out she lied to me about doing her homework. I believed her last night when she said she had finished it, especially since I saw her sit at the kitchen table and work on it. When I went to sign her homework folder this morning, I saw that she had left one whole worksheet blank!

She knows this kind of behavior is totally unacceptable, but lately she doesn't care. I've tried everything I can think of except talking to her karate teacher. So that is my next step. If that doesn't help, I'm considering counseling because she seems depressed also.

Wendy

"I will praise Thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are Thy works, and that my soul knoweth right well." Psalm 139:14

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3/22/07 9:12 P

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In my opinion, this work ethic is something that children should be learning from their parents. It's not enough for parents to care and want their children to succeed. They have to had started early on encouraging their children to take risks, to try new things, letting them fail and encouraging them to continue to try again. Kids need to feel that it is ok to reach a little higher for a goal. I think chldren are born with that drive (they learn to walk, talk, feed themselves, etc-) because their parents and other adults are encouraging them to keep trying. It's when parents start to "do" for the kids or try to shield them too much from frustration that the "work ethic" starts to diminish. JMHO

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DHEIL77's Photo DHEIL77 Posts: 743
3/22/07 6:03 P

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I agree with everyone. Have you ever read that e-mail about how much more a teacher would make as a babysitter. This discussio reminds me of that.

Along the same lines, have you noticed a sever drop in work ethic among your students? The majority of my studnts just don't seem to care. It's not that their parents don't care or want them to succeed, they just have no internal drive. My husband says he notices the same problem with many of the younger people he hires. In fact I was watching an anti-drug speaker on TV and he spent some of his time speaking on work ethic and it's decline. He said major companies would rather hire senior citizens or the mentally challenged than high school grads. What is with that?







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3/21/07 11:54 A

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I like that one too! I'll have to pass it on. We have actually had parents come spend the day with their kids and have seen what other students do (since their child is an angel when the parents are here). Then they realize what we put up with.

On a side note--I love my daughter tremendously, but I couldn't be with her 365 days a year, 24 hours a day. We need a little time apart because we are so much alike. :)

~Tracy~
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I like that one. I am going to have to pass that on to our leadership committee at school. Great idea.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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KTTYERWG Posts: 759
3/21/07 9:15 A

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Our principal also had a policy where a child who got an out of school suspension could change it to an inschool one if the parents agreed to come and sit with them all day in the ISS room and help the kids with the work provided by the teachers. That one worked great because alot of parents didn't want their kids at home alone when they were suspended and having to sit with them all day showed them how difficult it is to spend the whole day with someone who is not cooperative or motivated.

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3/21/07 12:38 A

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Think that people should have to take parenting classes before they have a kids. Don't know if that would help, but it wouldn't hurt. I know of family members who would rather fuss at their kids since they are in front of the t.v. on a rented movie instead of shutting it off and being with their child.

I have heard of principals who have taken students who have had major problems in school to their parents work. If the parent wouldn't come to pick up their child for out of school suspension, the principal would drop the student at their work. I love that. Put it back into the parents lap and maybe they would take more responsibility for their child. What a thought, huh?

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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KTTYERWG Posts: 759
3/20/07 11:34 P

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Our principal simply had no choice. This student's smell was so offensive we had other parents complaining. It just makes me sad that the kids are the ones who have to suffer because the parents will not take their responsibility. It seems like this is happening more and more these days. What else can we do? How do you get parents to be parents?

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NOEXCUSESFIT4ME's Photo NOEXCUSESFIT4ME Posts: 4,502
3/20/07 11:09 P

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Our principal would never do this, we work with developmental students. I am in Canada.

Kathy
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KTTYERWG Posts: 759
3/20/07 11:05 P

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We had a student like this and our administrator made the decision that everytime he showed up like what you described, his mother was called to come and get him. When she said she was at work and couldn't come and pick him up, our principal took him to her place of employment and dropped him off. He very rarely ever showed up like that again. Often times, DHS will not do anything because they have so many other kids who are being severely physically and sexually abused so if the student has a roof over their heads and food on the table, they will not pick them up.

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3/20/07 10:37 P

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We have an epileptic student who often wears the same clothes for days. We have clothes for her to change into at school and we have taken her down for showers and washed her hair etc. We have called the authorities but they always call the family first and so they have time to clean things up. She graduates this year and we are very worried that we will read about her in a head line in the newspaper. Her mom often doesn't give her the meds and then she seizures. We have given her clothes and have had to tell the mother they are for her as she has kept new shoes etc for herself. I have never met the mom but I am told that she is clean and very well dressed. You would never connect the 2 of them together. She has worn underwear so long that when we shower her, we have to throw them out as they are beyond trying to wash them. She doesn't bring in supplies for her monthly period and will leak right threw her clothes. I don't understand why CAS doesn't do anything. We think it's because kids like that are hard to place. It breaks my heart thinking about her. All my daughters clothes that get too short for them go to her and we keep them at school so we have things to change her into. Today I was sick, chest infection, and I had to ask her to move as I was gagging at the smell of her. Her homework, to shower. emoticon

Edited by: NOEXCUSESFIT4ME at: 3/20/2007 (22:38)
Kathy
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You know, I think some parents send their kids to school to get rid of them for a while. Sad that those people even have kids.

Wendy

"I will praise Thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are Thy works, and that my soul knoweth right well." Psalm 139:14

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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/20/07 10:06 P

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It is hard to get them between jobs. I would try calling their main number, but it is disconnected. All numbers for the parent/guardian's won't work. Hopefully their child is not on their deathbed since I can't get a hold of them.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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KTTYERWG Posts: 759
3/20/07 8:49 P

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But how many of them would actually follow through and show up at school to sit with their kids?

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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/20/07 7:45 P

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I have threatened students to have their parents come sit by them at school if they don't behave!

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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KTTYERWG Posts: 759
3/20/07 7:11 P

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Our school psychologist calls it Dysmomia (dysfunctional parents) We should make parents attend school with their kids so they can see what we put up with during the day.

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3/20/07 4:37 P

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Absolutely! More parents should "parent" their kids. It is frustrating to have to spend so much time teaching things a child should have learned at home. But think of this: Isn't it better for them to learn manners and respect from you, than not at all? Our jobs as teachers are so much more than simply teaching reading, math, science, etc. It is about teaching life, love, tolerance, PLUS mechanics! I know all of you know this or you wouldn't be teachers. Bless us all for the contributions we are making to "our" kids!!!

Wendy

"I will praise Thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are Thy works, and that my soul knoweth right well." Psalm 139:14

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STEALTHBMBSHLL's Photo STEALTHBMBSHLL Posts: 2,900
3/20/07 3:30 P

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EXACTLY!! I spend half my day breaking up fights, and talking about manners and RESPECT (because they sure don't learn that at home!)

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I agree. Let them come into my CWC Science and try to get those kids to learn science on the 7th grade level. Science has a totally different vocabulary, so they have to learn the meanings of the words along with trying to comprehend the material.

I wish parents took care of some "manners" issues at home so I would not have to spend class time trying to take care of them.

~Tracy~
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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/20/07 1:57 P

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All of us professional teachers know that "every" child will be at 100% by 2014, right? Let the people who designed the Act try if they think it can happen.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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STEALTHBMBSHLL's Photo STEALTHBMBSHLL Posts: 2,900
3/20/07 1:05 P

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Don't EVEN get me started on NCLB!
It ain't pretty!
lol

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3/20/07 11:46 A

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It is always interesting to hear the President talk about the No Child Left Behind Act, but he never says that it needs to begin at home with the parents/guardians. Strange huh?

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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DHEIL77's Photo DHEIL77 Posts: 743
3/20/07 11:40 A

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You're right, our job would be much easier most of the time if we didn't have to deal with parents. That's why I would not want to be an administrator.

That copier fixing job does sound nasty. Cat urine just never goes away!







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3/20/07 10:50 A

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I use to fix copier for a year and there was this one lawyer's office that none of us liked to go to. It was in a redone house with tons of cats. I would have to put copier paper down on the rug to keep the cat urine off of my pants. Than to open the back of the copier was even nastier. We finally got the contract dropped because of health issues. Boy was that nasty.
DHEIL77--I don't know if I would "fix" the parents or "fix" the students. I have a girl in my class who is from a group home. I don't know her background history, and sometimes I don't want to know it, but I would adopt her in a minute. What some of these kids go through in their lives are just not fair.

Edited by: BOODADDY at: 3/20/2007 (10:52)
Dennis

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DHEIL77's Photo DHEIL77 Posts: 743
3/20/07 10:48 A

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I have also had a few cases of the smellies in my fifth grade class. It seems to be a pivotal year for sweat, yet no deodorant. I've talked to students directly and contacted parents. Now, I have a classroom bunny and his smell covers up the smell of the kids. Ha Ha, don't know if that's good or bad. I also have a girl who comes from a smoking family. I can always tell which is her homework even if she forgets to put her name on it just by smelling it. I feel sorry for her, because she is being raised by her father and is a bit of an outcast at school and tells horrendous stories to get noticed. Don't you just wish you could *fix* all of them?

Edited by: DHEIL77 at: 3/20/2007 (10:48)






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KTTYERWG Posts: 759
3/20/07 10:19 A

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Just make sure people don't automatically assume it's drugs. In some states, parents can sue for libel if accused and the accusation is false.

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STEALTHBMBSHLL's Photo STEALTHBMBSHLL Posts: 2,900
3/20/07 10:15 A

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that's interesting about the cat urine smell and meth...
will pass THAT ONE on around here!

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KTTYERWG Posts: 759
3/20/07 9:10 A

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Our resource officer has told us that children who are raised in a house where Meth is being cooked will have a distinct odor of cat urine as amonia based chemicals are one of the key ingredients. We had a situation like this at our school and we all thought that the boys cat must be spraying him but it really was a case of the parents cooking Meth. It is not every kid but it is something to be on the lookout for. I never would have thought about it until I heard it from the RO.

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3/20/07 7:53 A

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The weather is beginning to warm up here in St. Louis. That is when we really notice the "stinkies". I like the baby wipe idea! Most of the girls do carry deodorant with them (and some of the worst smelling body spray I've ever smelled). My non-stinkies are usually pretty good about handling the situation tactfully. For that I am grateful!

~Tracy~
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3/19/07 11:20 P

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Interesting...like what? emoticon

Wendy

"I will praise Thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are Thy works, and that my soul knoweth right well." Psalm 139:14

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KTTYERWG Posts: 759
3/19/07 11:05 P

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Just a thought but you may want to watch the cat urine smell as it can be a sign of something much more going on besides just a cat.

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THETEEKER's Photo THETEEKER Posts: 119
3/19/07 9:20 P

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I teach 6th grade. I make it a point to talk about deodorant so much that some of the kids keep it in their pencil boxes. The girls go to the bathroom after gym (we have no locker rooms) and the boys just stick their deodorants under their shirts, do their thing, and put it back in their backpacks/desks. When a child is stinky I usually feel comfortable quietly asking them "did you use deodorant today?" In September, I usually don't do this but by now, I feel fine doing that.

Regarding cat smells and urine smells, we've had that problem, too. That one is harder to narrow down. In addition to communicating with the family, we've had other options. We've had students keep an extra change of clothes in school (change into in the AM and out of in the PM if clean clothes don't come right back). Also, keeping baby wipes for cleaning is helpful and reduces embarrassment and missed class time.

Edited by: THETEEKER at: 3/19/2007 (21:21)
4/1/07 April Fool's Virtual 5K - 43:11
4/14/07 Started managing my chocolate addiction
7/4/07 July 4th Virtual 5K - 45:03


 
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3/19/07 8:20 P

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intersting idea. Will have to pass that one on to my teammates.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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STEALTHBMBSHLL's Photo STEALTHBMBSHLL Posts: 2,900
3/19/07 8:18 P

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When the weather is warm, we give the kids baby wipes to use on their faces, necks and hands when they come in from recess or PE. Since I have a fridge in my class, I keep them in there and they are nice and cool. The kids think they are getting them to help cool off...and they kinda are, but it really helps with some of the smell, too!

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3/19/07 3:05 P

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That is a very touchy issue. I had the same problem when I was in the military over in Europe.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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3/19/07 1:24 P

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TEACHTLC--

I liked what you said: We all survive!

That's so true, and I think it is important in the meantime to teach the "non-smelly" students how to handle the stinkies with diplomacy. Out in the real world they will need to know how to handle such situations delicately.

When I was selling insurance, I had a VERY important client who was from the Middle East. She was a lovely woman, very polite, friendly, and eager to please, but in her culture, they do not use deodorant. Now, I live in South Texas, where it gets very hot and humid in the summer. My office always reeked after this client left (and during the visit)! But I didn't dare offend her because she brought so much money to my company!

Wendy

"I will praise Thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are Thy works, and that my soul knoweth right well." Psalm 139:14

“Your daily actions and words can impact more people than you ever realize!” SparkGuy



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3/19/07 1:07 P

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Interesting how the students some students with asthma are in the families who smoke. I hate getting around kid's backpacks when I know their families smoke. I had 1 family after P/T conference that I had to use my air freshener after they left due to the smoke smell. YUCK!

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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3/19/07 12:55 P

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I had just walked by a "smelly" one when I read this post. Unfortunately there is nothing she can do. She smells of cigarette smoke because everyone in her house smokes. We have some other boys who haven't realized that it is ok to shower every day. We're working on them. I DO have air freshener in my room but then I have to worry about the asthmatics/allergies that the kids have. We all survive!

~Tracy~
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3/19/07 12:40 P

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Poor kid...the one from Mexico! His culture is just so different from ours. I'm sure the transition was difficult for him. I'm glad, though, for his sake that he finally got the message.

Wendy

"I will praise Thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are Thy works, and that my soul knoweth right well." Psalm 139:14

“Your daily actions and words can impact more people than you ever realize!” SparkGuy



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BOODADDY's Photo BOODADDY Posts: 1,927
3/19/07 12:23 P

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How about garlic in the classroom to cover up the smell? Just a thought.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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LADYTIMEDRAMON's Photo LADYTIMEDRAMON Posts: 534
3/19/07 12:15 P

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I had one in 6th grade last year who just reeked. I kept referring him to the nurse. Finally, our "neighborhood liason" (a teacher who did special home visits, worked with parents, and such) seemed to get through. But some days the smell was vile - and since this student was a relative newcomer (he had come in to the US from Mexico just before Hurricane Katrina, then was evacuated to Dallas to my school) I had to work with him closely. I had to keep a can of odor neutralizer spray in my room. Some days the kids were begging me to use it. If the smell was too bad I sent him to the nurse.

Eventually he must have gotten the message... but not until the last few weeks of the year....

Edited by: LADYTIMEDRAMON at: 3/19/2007 (12:16)
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I was ordering our team office supplies in Jan and went to order 16 boxes of tissues, but ended up putting in for 16 cans of air freshener. I guess I should have kept them since the nice 99 degree weather last week and p.e. classes and recess. Boy have they come in nice and "sweat", NOT. May have to rethink about why I sent those back.

Dennis

"When in doubt, grill it! Just ask my beautiful wife."


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3/19/07 12:04 P

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I know it is hard on the rest of the class, but what about the poor guy (or girls) who is the stinky one? That's who my heart goes out to! Most of the time it is not the child's fault since he/she only knows what they're taught. I believe the biggest challenge is getting at the root of the problem while being sensitive to the child and not making him/her an object for the other kids to taunt.

Wendy

"I will praise Thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are Thy works, and that my soul knoweth right well." Psalm 139:14

“Your daily actions and words can impact more people than you ever realize!” SparkGuy



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DENISESP5's Photo DENISESP5 Posts: 174
3/19/07 11:53 A

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I am the school's counselor, and that is one of the hardest things I have to do. I do the puberty film with my fourth graders, but this kid is in the third grade. I may have made this kid's grandmother mad. She had to come to school and get him. But, "So be it!" The rest of the class was suffering.

You get what you give so always give your best.


 
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GEMSTONE1952's Photo GEMSTONE1952 SparkPoints: (90,289)
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3/19/07 11:48 A

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I've had few students like that. I don't know what grade levels you teach. Mine were elementary. The first time, I was a relatively "young" teacher (4 years experience) and I called in the parents to talk to them. It was not one of my better ideas. My principal suggested in the future, I refer the child to the health office. It seemed to work better. The parents were less angry when the nurse brought it up than when the teacher did. Years later, when it happened again, I was able to address it with the parents but I had a lot more experience dealing with parents by then. I also consulted with the nurse and school counsellor to see if there were any health or mental health issues I needed to concern myself with before calling. This time, the parents were appreciative.

"It does not matter how slowly you go, so long as you do not stop" (Confucius)

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.

(Henry David Thoreau )

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.
(Albert Einstein)



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MCRICK's Photo MCRICK SparkPoints: (4,217)
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3/19/07 11:47 A

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I have to tell my class as a whole that they are in 5th grade, going through puberty and need to shower daily, wear deodorant and clean clothing. I haven't pulled any specific students aside yet, but that is coming soon! I feel so bad for the kids that have to sit next to such stink! I even try to emphasis when student smells good so they get the picture!

Michele


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DENISESP5's Photo DENISESP5 Posts: 174
3/19/07 11:31 A

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Have you ever had to tell a student to take a bath? Recently I had to tell a student to take a bath, use soap, and put on some clean clothes including clean underwear and socks. This child smelled so badly that the rest of his class didn't want to be around him....no wonder he doesn't have any friends!!! This wasn't the first time either. A few weeks back, he took a shower in the nurse's station, but had to put the same dirty clothes back on...ugh!!! I think there are cats living in his house and they using his clothes as a litter box. Just wanted to vent and see if anyone else has had this problem.

You get what you give so always give your best.


 
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