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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/28/13 8:27 P

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For construction workers .......... in this part of the country ..... they have what's called:
"Buck's porta potties" ............. or "HoneyBucket's" .......... (yeah, right! emoticon for the workers to use ...............
What I WANT to say when asked, "Do you have a restroom here?" ............
A. "No ............. But if you go down about 6 blocks and hang a left, you will see a Buck's porta potty." ................. emoticon ...........

Or ........... "Yes, we do; why do you ask?" ................ emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2/28/13 8:14 P

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I get he same "do you have a bathroom" when I am at work. I tell them "No, I wait until I get home!" So do believe me, of course!

Deb
Eastern Time Zone

Don't sweat the small stuff, just sweat!

I am up to ME!



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SLOPOKE_SAL's Photo SLOPOKE_SAL Posts: 1,358
2/28/13 7:38 P

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Um...no, there are no bathrooms here. We all go out back to the outhouse!

If you want to be happy, desire and pursue happiness more for others than yourself, and your own well-being will take care of itself. Dedicate your weight-loss journey and the achievement of all your goals to someone else and think of them when times get tough.

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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/28/13 6:23 A

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AND the potty! A woman came up to me yesterday and asked, "Do you have a potty room?"

I wanted to answer .......... Ew, does ew have to dough tinkle? ..........

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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SLOPOKE_SAL's Photo SLOPOKE_SAL Posts: 1,358
2/27/13 10:36 P

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several times a day!

If you want to be happy, desire and pursue happiness more for others than yourself, and your own well-being will take care of itself. Dedicate your weight-loss journey and the achievement of all your goals to someone else and think of them when times get tough.

Co-leader Sarcastics Unlimited

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=4459


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2/27/13 10:08 P

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I'll bet they ALL go to the lie-berry.

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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/27/13 7:47 A

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I kind of like "Them graduates we seen ! emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2/26/13 11:05 P

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I guess we have a pretty good idea of what their graduates are capable of.

Or should I say "they're" or "there" graduates, since they wouldn't know the difference anyway?

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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/26/13 7:57 P

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I think perhaps they should edit their mission statement ............... Just in case someone actually takes the time to read it ................... emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2/26/13 10:37 A

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I'm doing some research for a client (okay, fine. I trust no one and I'm a nosy parker) and I check out the school she's attending to find a schedule. The school's mission statement is:

"Mission: Preparing Globally Compettive Student for College, Careers and Life."

That phrase was copied and pasted. I did not type it in, therefore, all typos are on the original website. Uh...yeah. Good luck with that.

My proof: ww2.nps.k12.va.us/education/dept/dep
t.
php?sectionid=52


Edited by: SARAALINE at: 2/26/2013 (10:48)
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2/25/13 8:50 A

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I have now finished the bag. The dumb part is if I allow my evil side to purchase another!

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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/24/13 10:32 A

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Just kidding emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2/24/13 9:21 A

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nope, it was only to save it for another day!

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2/23/13 12:56 P

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the dumb part ............. was it when you did NOT finish the bag? ................ emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2/23/13 11:08 A

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dumbest thing I witnessed today? Me, eating half a bag of Cheez-Its.

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2/22/13 10:48 P

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Soon we will all abbreviate our words to save time and energy and sound like a bunch of rappers! And for those who do not know where to punctuate, they often confuse an apostrophe for an accent!! ................ They will argue an accent is something that a foreigner has ................ emoticon
And an APOSTROPHE is a kind of mattress w/ special coils .............. emoticon
(there simply is no point of arguing with these folks!) ...........

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2/22/13 10:40 P

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As a former English major (should have stuck with it. I'd be making more money), all I can say is "ACK!" I would have gladly accepted "you'd've" as opposed to "you'd uh."
emoticon

Although, I do have to give you props 2B, you used the apostrophe correctly. I am simply amazed at how often people screw up apostrophe placement. I saw a commercial a few years ago for "Rent N Roll" which is a store where one can rent rims because we hood like dat her yo. In this commercial, there was no talking, just words flashing on the screen with pictures of rows of shiny rims, I think they were over estimating the intelligence of their assumed audience in thinking that they'd bother to read. But anyway, one of the phrases was "Youv'e got options."

emoticon

"YOUV'E?" Really? Really?

Yes really. God bless DVR because I went back and paused it and just stared at it. It was horrifying.

Edited by: SARAALINE at: 2/22/2013 (22:47)
2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/22/13 10:33 P

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emoticon ... (wish you'd uh been there) ........... (Hope no English major just read this!) .............

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2/22/13 3:40 P

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2B, I'm laughing so hard at your description of the event (the parts where you could see, of course)...I feel as if I were in the midst of a cowboy movie, with all that dust flying and buffalo galloping (or something like that).

I caught myself just as I was about to shout "YEE HAW!!"

Whew! I'm beat. All this living vicariously through others has me whupped. I wonder if that can count as my cardio for the day?

*typing furiously into fitness tracker: "reading exciting events of virtual friends, 20 calories" *

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2/21/13 9:55 P

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Ok , I guess so! Good night, I'm tired now! emoticon
Anyway, good deeds........

Deb
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Don't sweat the small stuff, just sweat!

I am up to ME!



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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/21/13 9:45 P

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You are right ....... (another dunder on my part-- emoticon )
Ok ..... To the best of my recollection ....... How it WENT DOWN..........
#1-PArty (Melissa) was out smoking her cigarette (way out in smokers paradise)
Melissa SPOTS man on ground.
Melissa takes off like a WILD HERD OF BUFFALO running into the building.
Nancy was behind her only a few feet ............ and saw the trail of dust Melissa left behind.
Nancy THEN COMES GALLOPING AT FULL BORE ............ Bringing up the REAR OF MELISSA (#1 party) ..................close behind.
(I thought a relay race was in progress for which I wanted NO PART OF!! .........
I was in BURNOUT MODE .......... (and furthermore, told my supervisor of this!)
So ............... I did not SPEED as others, but rather walked like a civilized person (kinda)
over to her (my supervisor) and commenced to say:
MAN DOWN IN PARKING LOT .............. so can you come stay out front?"
She hastily walked out but I lo0ked at her ........ as if to ask, "So then, did YOU want to go out there or ME?"
She nodded, YOU .......... and I thought, OH CRAP!!! I am flat burned out, but nevertheless, I RAN LIKE THE BUILDING WAS ABLAZE!! ...........
That is when I proceeded to the scene to find BOTH Nancy and Melissa and the man, and I could see someone ELSE was about to get HURT!!! ..................... emoticon ..........
I THEN said, "HOLD IT!!" ................ (they were about to just start grabbing the poor little man)
anyhoo, guess you don't need to know every gory detail ............... as if this were a crime scene ................... It WAS THEN MY GLASSES TURNED DARK emoticon w/ out my knowing and I thought the POWER WAS DOWN as well as the poor little man ............ OMG!!! ...........
Now I am REALLY tired!!!! ...................... and I now know how Batman feels!!! emoticon
does that answer the Q. satisfactorily? emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2/21/13 8:58 P

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2B, was Nancy 1 foot away from the helpless wonder who came to get you, or 1 foot away from the fallen man? I'm unclear on this. If close to the man, she should have reacted without being told.
If closer to the tattle-tale , then she, the tattler, must not have any faith in her. Either way, looks like you were the only competent person around. emoticon
emoticon emoticon



Deb
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Don't sweat the small stuff, just sweat!

I am up to ME!



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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/21/13 8:00 P

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ADDENDUM to yesterday's DUMB 'n stupid incident ...............

IF you all read ........... you heard about the elderly little man who fell down on the sidewalk .............. so TODAY Nancy walks up to me and says:
"I JUST HAVE TO ASK ................. WHY IN GODS' NAME DID Melissa COME RUNNING LIKE THUNDERCATS TO YOU TO HAVE YOU RUN LIKE A BOLT OF LIGHTENING to come rescue this poor man ................. when I WAS STANDING ONE FOOT AWAY ............... and would have GLADLY HELPED!!!" ......................

Well ......... because she NEARLY LOST HER MIND, I AM GUESSING?" ..............
(and that would have been too easy!!) ....................

And last .............. because it gives FODDER to this column .............. I mean thread, or team ................... emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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SLOPOKE_SAL's Photo SLOPOKE_SAL Posts: 1,358
2/21/13 7:48 P

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Sounds like a emoticon day!

If you want to be happy, desire and pursue happiness more for others than yourself, and your own well-being will take care of itself. Dedicate your weight-loss journey and the achievement of all your goals to someone else and think of them when times get tough.

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2/21/13 7:47 P

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Now who looks dumb! lol emoticon

Deb
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Don't sweat the small stuff, just sweat!

I am up to ME!



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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/21/13 7:45 P

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DARLY .............. You ask: "Did I NOT read my instructions that came w/ my glasses?" ................... Are you KIDDING ME?? ............. How could I READ THE INSTRUCTIONS WHEN I WOULD HAVE TO take the glasses OFF AND CAN'T READ W/ OUT THEM?? ........................... emoticon .................... LOL

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
2/21/13 7:43 P

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Yes .......... Why I did NOT think of that ......... probably cause I was in such a stupor ........... (Do you guys think you could excuse me on this one?) cause last year IT DID happen ......... a power failure in our clinic PLUS a two block radius! .............. People were freaking ............. (Mostly the people being operated on, I think!!) ..... and someone on a potty chair!! emoticon ..................
So my first reaction, never having them darken was OH NO!! AGAIN!! (and I was SUPPOSED TO BE AT LUNCH and I was detained!!!) ............. emoticon ..........
Some serious stuff!! ................ emoticon (It's always something!!) .............

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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BUDDYSMYFRIEND's Photo BUDDYSMYFRIEND SparkPoints: (11,446)
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2/21/13 6:22 P

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DATMAMA4 - Marco-Polo! It's a darn good thing I wasn't drinking anything at the time, because I would have choked. I laughed so hard I almost cried!! It was awesome!!! emoticon

If you want to win anything- a race, yourself, your life- you have to go a little berserk. George Sheehan

"You can't cross a sea by merely standing and staring at the water. Rabindranath Tagore



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2/21/13 5:01 P

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Heh! I remember my "transitions" glasses but I pretty much gave up on them now - they won't work in the car, unless I pay extra for the glass lenses - those lenses will transition inside the car. But plastic lenses - nope. Only from inside house/office to outdoors (like if going for a walk).

Today, the dumbest thing was really more of a silly thing (I *think* there is a difference??) - but as some know, we're all having a big winter storm here in the mid-west , Oklahoma and Kansas yesterday and today, and we still have some of it in Kansas right this minute, as the bulk of the storm continues on up towards Iowa and Illinois and Wisconsin later tonight or early tomorrow.....

And as some may remember, we got a new Chihuahua mix (terrier??) puppy in November, so today was really her first BIG snow - taller than she is!! I tried (in vain) to get her to go outside to go pee and potty, but all she wanted to do was stick her snout in the snow and eat it!! Then she'd look up at me all puzzled, like" What Was THAT?!"
She still hasn't peed on the snow, so I guess it's safe to make snow ice cream, eh??

NOT
emoticon



OOOOH phone rang as I typed this ... school is closed for tomorrow as well!!!
emoticon

Matthew 6:33-34
But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
*****************


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2/21/13 3:04 P

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Just yell, "Marco!" and head in the direction of the first person to yell, "Polo!"

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2/21/13 7:07 A

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OK 2B, Did you not read the instructions that came with your glasses? emoticon
emoticon Then again, if your glasses were that dark, you really didn't witness a thing, did you? Did you have to feel your way back to your desk? I hope you didn't yell for someone to check the breakers !

Good job helping the fallen man though!

Deb
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Don't sweat the small stuff, just sweat!

I am up to ME!



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2/20/13 7:43 P

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I am going to stick my neck out ............ and be the Butt of the joke!

The story .......... This co-worker comes GALLOPING up the front desk and announces:
COME QUICK!! A MAN HAS FALLEN DOWN ON THE SIDEWALK!" ........... emoticon
(Um ......... Ok)
So a couple of us go out and sure enough, this older frail man was laying all twisted on the sidewalk ............... We got him into a wheel chair ............ and I told him we needed to go back inside to fill out a 'small incident report." ..........
After we did, he said he would walk away to his car and I said, "No ............. I would like to take you out to the car (w/ his wife) ................. We get outside and I ask, "Ok, where are you parked?"
They both hmm ........... and point, "Somewhere over THERE." ....................
So we circle the parking lot searching for a "tan' car ................. and finally find it.
I THEN go back into the building and wonder: NOW WHAT?!!! ......... "All the power is off? cos it is all DARK INSIDE!
It occurred to me after a moment (or 3) that my new glasses turn DARK when outside so they were BLACK!!!! ................... emoticon ........ What can I say? ........ durr!!

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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1/22/13 8:56 P

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Please defer to above threads .......... Plenty of stupidity going around these days ........... chime in ..........

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
1/8/13 9:34 P

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Here is another pain in the A$$ saying .................
One person makes a statement and person # 2 says:
"That sounds about right." ................... Seriously: ABOUT??#@! ..............

And my husband speaks correctly and like an intelligent human being ...... BUT his sister, (from the same flock) has her own rule book ................. Example:
"I seen them goin to town when we was goin there too."
Everything is: "We WAS ............. and "We SEEN .............. How can TWO people be so night and day different under the same roof? ................... emoticon

(I tell you ......... It makes me "JUST ABOUT LOSSE MY MIND!!" ........... And I SEEN where it bugs you'all too!! (hee hee) ...................

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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1/8/13 9:27 P

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Well do 'yoose guy's wanna what really shakes my tree? .............. I'll tell ya ..........
When someone says something and the listener doesn't hear it the first time.... so they ask:
"COME SAY?" ........................ emoticon ................ Seriously, I know my eyes must bug.............. emoticon .............. Please someone tell me WHY?? .............. Did this originate in some bizarre twisted place in the back hills? .......... ??

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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1/8/13 7:28 P

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I can only be thankful that they're not MY in-laws, so I can laugh about it instead of being driven crazy. My own in-laws are actually nice...so I guess that's weird enough.

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1/8/13 3:01 P

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It's been my experience that in-laws can be real a-ho's so I believe that DM4.

If you want to be happy, desire and pursue happiness more for others than yourself, and your own well-being will take care of itself. Dedicate your weight-loss journey and the achievement of all your goals to someone else and think of them when times get tough.

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1/8/13 2:27 P

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If you being sentence with "I seen," I can only assume that the rest of the sentence will not be "the inside of a book" (sadly, this is not original).

People here say "mines" all of the time and they're not talking about coal or uranium. "It's mines" makes my skin crawl.

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1/8/13 11:26 A

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I live in an area where "I seen" is a common phrase. It drives me nuts! ...right along with the phrase, "Not hardly." What the heck does that even mean? Doesn't that mean the opposite of what they're trying to say?

One of my friends has in-laws who think she's trying to "talk fancy" and "above her station" if she uses words that are more than two syllables. She jokes that she married her husband because he was the only one in his family with all his teeth. Pick o' the litter.

Are people that ignorant, really, that they would scorn someone for using words properly?

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1/8/13 9:59 A

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2B - I can't stand that one either. It makes me "loose" my mind. Another one is "Alls I know is...." and "I seen her yesterday" and the ultimate "Will you save my seat why I get some coffee?" It's ALL, SAW and WHILE - how did these dimwits ever graduate high school?
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~~Kelly~~


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1/8/13 7:56 A

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Ignorance gone to seed ............. emoticon .......... They sprout everywhere!! (I still look on new pages to see a member saying, "I need to loose 30#" and I would like to loose this by March 1st." ..................
Makes you wonder when they lost their purse, do they say: "I just loosed my purse?" ...... Just where do they use the word: "Lose?" ................... emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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1/7/13 10:34 A

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KJ - Sorry to say it but the answer to your question is NO. When I worked as a Technical Writer/Editor the documentation and correspondence I received from engineers and corporate managers made me think their college degrees were all FAKE. People either don't care or rely on spell-check for everything. And the whole text-speak lingo seems to be making everything worse. The saddest thing is when I see misspelled words on company work vans/trucks. "Call today for a free estimat" or "We delivery free".....the sign maker AND the company owner BOTH didn't catch those errors??!!
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~~Kelly~~


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1/7/13 9:49 A

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I have a good one. My niece is getting married this summer. We received a "Save-the-Date" card in the mail. Believe it or not, the groom's name is misspelled and the date was incorrect. They caught the date error (and corrected it with White-Out and ballpoint pen) but they didn't even notice the misspelled name. Seriously??? Does no one proofread anymore? I can't wait to see the actual wedding invitation!

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1/6/13 9:49 P

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Another good one with my step-daughter. Keep in mind while reading this that hubby and I discuss secular things ALL the time with our kids. We tell them the true history of every holiday. I am a scientist (not scientologist). OK.

So, my daughter did something stupid in the kitchen. I do not even remember what because it is commonplace. I remarked that I would be surprised if she lived to be an adult. She asked why and I said "evolution". She looked at me and said, I swear-"Oh yeah! I learned about that. Where is that place??"

*Face palm*

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to ROWANTREES .......... Here's one response you 'could have' said to the 13 yr old when asking whatcha doin?" ...................
"Well ............ the little guy decided since it was too cold to go outside and play in the water, he wanted to WATER THE TOILET!" ................. (we really need a rolling eyes emoticon)


~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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I'm gonna give the emoticon to the Oxymoron-nurse who asked if he left w/ the heart failure!! ...................... Honestly!!! ....................

and BTW: great job on posting too!! (You definitely have the hang of it!!) ........ encore!

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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1/5/13 5:14 P

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Patient wins the moron trophy!
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~~Kelly~~


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1/5/13 4:30 P

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emoticon Nurse

If you want to be happy, desire and pursue happiness more for others than yourself, and your own well-being will take care of itself. Dedicate your weight-loss journey and the achievement of all your goals to someone else and think of them when times get tough.

Co-leader Sarcastics Unlimited

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1/5/13 3:32 P

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Voting time. My wife and I spent about 4 hours in the ER last night and, along with a host of other gems, heard two beautiful comments from the same nurse to two different patients. We need your help deciding which wins the prize of last night's excursion.

1) "Okay, you say you're having pains in your chest. Where is your chest pain at?" I'm sure this was followed with a look that could have won an Emmy as it was followed with a longish pause before answered with, "In my chest."

2) "So, you were discharged from here last night, too. When you left last night, were you experiencing shortness of breath or heart failure?"

So, is the winner the nurse asking the stupid questions, the patient that answered that the pain was in his chest, the hospital for possibly discharging someone actually having heart failure, or the patient who may have allowed the hospital to discharge him instead of gasping and clutching his chest?

You Gotta Wanna!


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The dumbest thing I witness on a regular basis is that wonderful category of parents-who-have-no-business-having-childr
en. In the grocery store. After 11 p.m. With a toddler, who is screaming and crying, perhaps because toddlers should be HOME and IN BED at 11 p.m.

The parent-who-has-no-business-having-a child is, of course, screaming at the child to SHUT UP OR I'M GONNA WHIP YOUR A$$, which, as we all know, will quiet a screaming child who is over-tired in an instant, right?

The screaming (on the part of the parent) is bad enough -- I can completely sympathize with the poor little kid -- but the swearing at a little one just makes me want to jump right in there with a well-placed comment...or duct tape.

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The problem with this thread is the dumbest thing I see on a daily basis tends to be my kids. The older 2 kids (age 13 and 10) seem to have lost too many brain cells in the last few years to live. Seriously. I will post goodies here and there but today's incident is typical.

I am helping my 4 year old boy use the restroom today and the 13 year old walked by. She stood there and said, "awwwww, whatcha doing?" Ummmm, well, he is standing there with an arc of urine going into the toilet so....I am going with "using the restroom". However, me being me, my response was "Cooking dinner!" And then she continues to stand there.

emoticon

Edited by: ROWANTREES at: 1/4/2013 (21:19)
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1/4/13 6:54 P

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DIS-1,
UNBELIEVABLE!!! This douche takes the bag!! .......... and like yu, WHAT in Gods' name was he getting the ol dome buzzed for?? ............... (Maybe he thinks it will make some peach fuzz grow!!) ............. and those rotten brats!! Why on earth would they think there would be CANDY there?? ................... They all need a good flogging!! ............... emoticon
(was this HIM??) not lol .................

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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1/4/13 5:07 P

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I hope the a-ho gave her a decent tip!

If you want to be happy, desire and pursue happiness more for others than yourself, and your own well-being will take care of itself. Dedicate your weight-loss journey and the achievement of all your goals to someone else and think of them when times get tough.

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1/4/13 6:51 A

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2B - There are just soooo many dumb things I witness every time I leave the house it's hard to choose the dumbest. For example, yesterday I took my girls in for haircuts and while I was waiting....A bald dad walked into the salon and his 2 little boys burst in and began searching for candy. When they couldn't find any, their hairdresser dug out some Christmas cookies for them. The littlest one was ticked cuz he wanted candy so he began whining, crying, then screaming! Then his dad sat in the chair for a haircut BUT HE'S BALD!!. She ran a shaver over his dome and trimmed invisible sideburns. He told her he'd be back next Thursday -- are you kidding me, FOR WHAT?? Meanwhile, the bigger kid is eating all the cookies and the little brat is STILL screaming. Thankfully we were leaving as they attempted to hold the maniac down for his haircut. OMG, people if you're a douche bag of a parent and your kids are wild animals DON'T inflict your dysfunction on innocent people in public places where we are trapped and paying to be there.
emoticon

~~Kelly~~


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1/3/13 10:32 P

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Don't tell me no one witnessed anything 'dumb' today ............... How can that be?? ..... emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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12/5/12 7:11 P

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We are trying to reach all of our active team members (if you are reading this that's you!). We are hoping to get several to participate in our team cyber punk of Bruce (The Slowest Loser) who recently wrote about our team resulting in several new members. One of those great new members volunteered to get our goodie gifting thread going again. The first "victim" which we hit on Thanksgiving day said she was cyber-punked, we like the new name!
to participate head over to the goodie gifting thread

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/team_mes
sa
geboard_thread.asp?board=1895x4459x4R>7513733


Edited by: SLOPOKE_SAL at: 12/5/2012 (19:19)
If you want to be happy, desire and pursue happiness more for others than yourself, and your own well-being will take care of itself. Dedicate your weight-loss journey and the achievement of all your goals to someone else and think of them when times get tough.

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11/29/12 9:04 P

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This reminds how my son got rid of one annoying boy. This little guy was a son of a Warsaw taxi driver . It probably does not mean anything to you, but this is really something! He was very skillfully calling my son names. So my son said to him: " You know who you are? You are just a jar of fermented babyfood!!!" He was 6 at this time! I was so absolutely proud of him!! His adversary got all red on the face and said " You know what, you know what, you know what...." and that was all he was able to say!! We won!

And we absolutely need aggression in certain situations, how can those teachers be so blind?

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11/29/12 8:16 P

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It's getting more and more ridiculous by the day -- a friend of mine had her son suspended from school for a day because he said, "Pina colada!" Yes, that's right. Pina colada.

The teacher said he'd said it "in an aggressive manner, like he was using it as a substitute for a swear word." My friend went to the school's principal to make sure he knew what an overreacting moron the teacher was. Mind you, this is a kid who is a good student, so the teacher had no reason to react this way.

Ughhh.

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11/29/12 3:35 P

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Friend's son sharpened his pencil at school. Wanted to show his classmate how sharp it was. He said: " Ouch, it is sharp!" The teacher heard it and sent the boy to the principal. My friend was called to come to school and had to listen to the story of her son's aggressive behaviour.

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11/24/12 1:10 P

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A 4 minute tribute to LARRY HAGMAN at the top of the hour on CNN. I am sorry the guy died but hot damn, I did want to catch something really important, like say, who is shooting who, which country is mad at another country.. you get the picture...

Liz Scott

I am too blessed to be stressed.

facebook.com/mamalizpdx


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11/23/12 10:39 P

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I witnessed a mom allowing her (maybe 2 year old) daughter walk hand-unheld in a busy parking lot on Black Friday. The mom eventually looked up and seemed surprised that a car was coming. Uh, yeah. Dumb A! emoticon

Northern VA~ Skeewee2mek
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11/21/12 4:57 P

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Wow!! That is super scary!! Did they NOT think it prudent to ASK them in their interview:
"Soooooooooooooooo how do you handle a storm or a blizzard?" ...... Just a thought instead of blindly' hiring someone ..... (the blind leading the blind!) ........

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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11/21/12 9:25 A

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A Cab driver so scared of driving in our winter blizzard that he took up a passenger's offer to drive....Really people....immigrant drivers should drive non-commercially in two Winnipeg winters before operating a commercial vehicle...... of 8 accidents I witnessed, 6 involved cabbies,

Plant your own garden; decorate your own soul.
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11/13/12 3:17 P

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Good for him!!! We don't need these young "whipper-snappers" aka SMART ASS's on the loose!!!! ...

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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11/13/12 11:25 A

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I witnessed an antique Sarcastic guy when I took FIL to P.T. yesterday. The perky young guy behind the counter asked him "Are you ready to exercise Mr. ----?" He said "I wouldn't have drove 100 miles to get here if I wasn't"!

emoticon go get em Sir!

If you want to be happy, desire and pursue happiness more for others than yourself, and your own well-being will take care of itself. Dedicate your weight-loss journey and the achievement of all your goals to someone else and think of them when times get tough.

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11/13/12 10:13 A

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Tried watching Magic Mike last night but didn't make it through...but if it was Channing just dancing throughout the whole movie I would of loved it!!

So under Dumbest Thing You Witnessed...we ended up watching the movie "Ted"
Sooooo dumb!! but FUNNY:)
I have a warped sense of humour!

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11/13/12 10:05 A

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I think that may be grounds for a grounding....

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11/13/12 9:07 A

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A magic moment lost forever!! ........... LOL ........... (a lesson learned ......... for girls to always stay BEHIND their Mom!! ............... LOL

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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11/12/12 4:44 P

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Ill have to watch Magic Mike tonight now!! Lol

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11/12/12 3:48 P

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emoticon Unfortunately the pix wound up being the back of my daughter's head. I'm so bummed cuz I really wanted to share the moment with you peeps.
emoticon

~~Kelly~~


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11/12/12 2:23 P

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So... you didn't get the shot?
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11/12/12 11:35 A

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This is more of a wacky thing but worthy of sharing. My girls and I were on our way back to our room after taking a look at the hotel pool when we stopped dead in our tracks at the bank of elevators. A very muscular, soaking wet hottie wearing only a towel was waiting for a lift to the same floor as ours. Eyes popping, jaws dropping - we followed him into the elevator. I couldn't resist - I had to take a pix. I grabbed my cell and pretended to be reading something on it while framing him for the shot. As I'm ready to snap the photo - the doors open, my youngest daughter steps in front of me and hottie flees to his room.
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~~Kelly~~


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11/6/12 11:22 A

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I had my baby girls ears pierced at 6-7 weeks .......... They numbed them good, & she only scowled for a second ......... People nearby thought I was an unfit Mother ........ But I refrained from judging them w/ their questionable quirks ........... Different strokes ......

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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11/6/12 10:26 A

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I've had my ears pierced since I was 2 and had another one put in when I was about 50 so that I could wear my diamond studs all the time... I don't remember when I was 2 ... the 2nd time it was sore for about 2 days...... I guess the bigger question is why video tape that?? all a matter of perspective.



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11/6/12 12:49 A

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my dad sent me a video of my sister getter her 18 month old's ears pierced. The girl screamed her head off for about 10 minutes. her 3 year old sister refused to watch and started crying. My sister had multiple ear infections in her ears when she was 9-12yrs old from her earings. why on earth would you do this to your little ones?

Don't forget to be awesome.


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11/5/12 6:48 P

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think of the favor he'd do us all..... one less to contend with.....



Nothing changes unless something changes.

I am a treasured child of the most High God
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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 8,942
11/5/12 4:49 P

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Wow!! That is incredibly scary ............ and stupid!! ............. Can't they READ?? ........


~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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11/5/12 1:31 P

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I was walking over to the grocery store that is in the same strip mall as my office and, lo and behold, there is a young employee of said grocery store hunkered down smoking a cigarette.

emoticon Alas, that was not the dumbest thing! emoticon
The thing that may one day win this young man a Darwin Award is that he was leaning against a cage full of (presumably full) propane tanks with numerous "No Smoking" warnings posted all over this thing.

I actually see this quite often. emoticon

Edited by: SARAALINE at: 11/5/2012 (13:42)
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11/4/12 4:06 P

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This was not witnessed today, but several years back when my hubby and I were dating.

We were out with friends, and when we all started getting in our cars to leave, our friend was frantically trying to jimmy her locked car door. (The "olden days" before remote openers, of course -- and she had manual locks, She'd pushed the lock down, & shut the door right before noticing her keys sitting on the driver's seat.)

A bunch of the guys were trying to push a hanger through the weather stripping, etc. to no avail. They were just getting ready to break the driver's window as a last resort, when my husband walked around the car, opened the passenger side, slid over to the driver's side & unlocked the door. No one had thought to check the other car doors. Duh. He didn't let her live that one down for a long, long time.

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11/3/12 8:18 P

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LOL, LOL Sad but still funny.
# 2 is definitely a pathetic example of our public education system, But I think the last one is proof that not all people should be parents!

Edited by: DARLY55 at: 11/3/2012 (20:44)
Deb
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I am up to ME!



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11/3/12 10:58 A

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Didn't personally witness these, got in an email but they fit here! What's your favorite?
I like #2

ONE

Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets.

I asked for a half dozen nuggets.

'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the teenager at the counter.

'You don't?' I replied.

'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply.

'So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?'

'That's right.'

So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets

(Unbelievable but sadly true...)

(Must have been the same one I asked for sweetener, and she said they didn't have any, only Splenda and sugar.)


TWO

I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those 'dividers' that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed.

After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the 'divider', looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.

Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is?'

I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today.'

She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left.

She had no clue to what had just happened.

( But the lady behind me had a big smirk on her face as I left)


THREE

A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into herfloppy drive and pulling it out very quickly.

When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM 'thingy.'
(Keep shuddering!!)

FOUR

I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you need some help?' I asked. She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?'

'Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked.

'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered,handing it and the car keys to me. As Itook the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk....'
PLEASE just lay down before you hurt yourself !!!


FIVE

Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier', the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five 'blank' copies

Brunette, by the way!!


SIX

A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer......'

Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency right now!'


Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid!!!!


If you want to be happy, desire and pursue happiness more for others than yourself, and your own well-being will take care of itself. Dedicate your weight-loss journey and the achievement of all your goals to someone else and think of them when times get tough.

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11/1/12 9:28 P

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a Customer called in and said "your system is a pain in the ass. what do you suggest i do about it"

I really, really wanted to say "use preperation H" i bit my toungue

Don't forget to be awesome.


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11/1/12 7:17 P

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No...he's not joking. AND he's about to get something started!

We Californians don't take lightly to you East Coasters talkin' $hit about us!

Ah...yankin yer frickin' chain, Rick. My Floridian brother thinks that as soon as you cross the California border your mind gets sucked out, and we're all exactly the same. He's actually said, "Well, you're from California...what did I expect?"

I could say the same thing about Floridians, but I have it on good authority that it's just him that is the problem.

And we will most certainly lighten up cause we don't want to hurt you or your friends' feelings while you go about picking fruit FROM the fruit trees and NOT from the vegetable trees. Enjoy freezing the fruits of your labors so that they will last forever. In other words, we will not rain on your parade...though you could probably use some rain, huh?

I'm feeling conflicted now. To wish you rain, or not to wish you rain?

Edited by: SASSYJAY at: 11/1/2012 (19:19)
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11/1/12 6:27 P

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RWILCO01 .... your joking right?!?!?!?


as for the spider... it would be flatter than a pancake with legs!

Edited by: GARDENCHRIS at: 11/1/2012 (18:29)


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11/1/12 4:52 P

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wELL SARAALINE .......... I hate to tell ya .......... But I am SURE I saw your name listed the other night on The Ten Most Wanted ...... for this heinous crime!!! .......... And I think it falls into the category of serial killers ........ since a massacure was committed w/ these poor defenseless critters .......... God rest their souls!! ....................

But guess what?? Last night my hubby says in loud tone: "LOOK!! There is a spider!!!" I yell: WHERE!!!??%$#" emoticon and then I see the furry beast shuffling across the floor!!! (He was no small fry, so I shrieked: DO SOMETHING !! ............ HURRY!!!!! emoticon
he went running into the kitchen (Hubby--not spider) ............ and grabbed a hankie, quickly hurled him outside ............. just missed a trick-er-treater but at least he did not commit a crime ................. (am not sure what the sentence might be) ...................

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11/1/12 3:43 P

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Some guy was out hiking and he got bit by a copper head snake.
He killed the snake and brought it with him to the emergancy room - (helps to know what kind of snake bit you so they can come up with a serum for you (DUH)

The animal rights people gave him a load of #$%^for killing the snake.

Now that IS the dumbest thing of the day!



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11/1/12 1:19 P

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In regard to the video: OMG... so first of all, being from Cali she's right on with almost everything.
I did object in that I dont see how the hell you expect us east coasters to mine, make silkworms and cotton without our chinese slaves, but aside from that I join in and applaud with the rest of the excited folks as she made her way off the podium.
You sarcastic spark people really need to lighten up.

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11/1/12 11:50 A

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I used to work in a bait shop. Am I culpable for the deaths of the squids and bloodworms I sold or as an accessory to murder for the fish that were caught by the fishermen to whom I sold the aforementioned squid and bloodworms?
Bubba: "Whaddya in fer?"
Me: "Mass Murder and accessory to murder"
Bubba: "Uh..."
Me: "Yep. ((spit)) I worked in a bait shop."

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11/1/12 7:53 A

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OK Chris, I suffered through the whole video! I love this girl - she makes me look like a genius! What I liked best was the little girl on her mom's lap with a WTF look on her face, she was 2 or 3 maybe. And her brother who kept popping his head up in disbelief that the council let her speak that long! Anyway, thanks for the wake up call this morning!


Deb
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I am up to ME!



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10/31/12 9:17 P

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yea good Idea lets erect memorials for snails, ants, all bugs killed on windshields and grills of cars, all road kill...... whatever else some bat $hit stupid person want to erect for what ever she/he deems more important than HUMAN LIFE! These people need to remove themselves from the human race.


you will fall down laughing how STUPID this person IS!!!!!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=WPenRpVp_Fk



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10/31/12 1:00 P

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DARLY - omg you made me laugh so hard I startled my dog, you are sooo funny!! I like your bloody idea, although I'd NEVER want to drive that disturbing stretch of highway. lolololol

SARA - very well put, I completely agree!

~~Kelly~~


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10/31/12 11:25 A

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There is simply NO humor in this one ...... whatsoever .......... a Few years ago a drunk driver plowed into a car of five ........ the entire family w/ small children were killed ......... the person who killed them had just come from a tavern one half block away ............ a memorial site was erected right by the tavern on the corner of a very busy street w/ a cross and artificial flowers .................. I still remember the sad occasion .......... AND THE OWNER of the taver STILL protests since saying he wants that removed cos it 'may hurt his business!!!!' .................. You judge .............. emoticon

Edited by: 2BDYNAMIC at: 10/31/2012 (11:26)
~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

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10/31/12 10:47 A

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People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals has their main headquarters in my hometown. God help us.

((End sarcasm))I'm all for the ethical treatment of animals, but, lest we forget, human beings are animals too. I don't think I read in the article posted by BUDDY that this young woman had any concern for any human beings that may or may not have been injured in the crash that resulted in the loss of life of fish.

Everytime I drive down Brambleton Ave and pass their incredibly large and ugly building, it 1.) reminds me of these peoples' egos and 2.) makes me wonder how many fish they killed building their headquarters right on the Elizabeth River which, coincidentally, is one of the most polluted rivers in America. I'm sure that the average member of PETA is a fine, upstanding person who is sincere in his/her convictions, but throwing red paint on women wearing fur coats and holding pictures of dead pigs while wearing string bikinis at the Oscar Meyer Weiner truck is a bit much. ((end seriousness))

I feel serious today. I don't like this....

PETA: People Eating Tasty Animals.
MEAT IS MURDER!!!!! Tasty, tasty murder.

Edited by: SARAALINE at: 10/31/2012 (10:59)
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10/31/12 9:59 A

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OMG!!! This story should get some kind of STUPID RECOGNITION like on the media: "THIS IS THE STUPIDEST WOMAN WHO EVER LIVED!!!!!" ............... What next? We'll be feeling sorry for snails and slugs and PROTEST against snail bait .............. to save their slimy little ugly lives!!! ............. But IF killed by those who are INSENSITIVE (j/k) ........... we could hold a CELEBRATION OF LIFE or something!!!!! ................... emoticon

~Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .... Mother Teresa

~ What I do today shapes my tomorrow. ~I will seize the day~

~To gain friends is to first become a friend~


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10/31/12 9:26 A

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It is deer season around here, would it be too crass to mount the heads along the highway in memorium. But then again, they might confuse the live deer! Never mind!

Deb
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Don't sweat the small stuff, just sweat!

I am up to ME!



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10/31/12 8:06 A

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OMG, she could have a full-time job putting up roadside memorials for all of the "road kill" we have here cuz of the abundance of 'critter-filled' woods around us.
emoticon

~~Kelly~~


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10/31/12 7:55 A

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too bad someone didn't haul that dim wit somewhere!!!



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