SparkPoints: (103,186)
Fitness Minutes: (54,945) Posts: 9,112 6/27/11 11:36 A
Oh the insanity of it all!
"Every man I meet is in some way my superior, and in that I can learn of him." John Adams Ruth
TAYGRL
SparkPoints: (55,637)
Fitness Minutes: (25,716) Posts: 2,074 6/25/11 7:15 P
key-oot!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ *Sh@untay*
I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see. -- John Burroughs, essayist and naturalist
Don't postpone joy until you have learned all of your lessons. Joy is your lesson. -- Alan Cohen, American businessman
What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact. --Don Williams, Jr., American novelist and poet
May Minutes: 1,101
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GARDENCHRIS
SparkPoints: (126,225)
Fitness Minutes: (55,259) Posts: 7,184 6/25/11 5:02 P
this landed in my box this morning and it is rather amusing...
THIS DOES PROVE INTERESTING IF YOU HAVE A LITTLE TIME FOR THE RIDICULOUS.
An Ode to the English Plural
We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and there would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!
Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There
is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither
apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England .
We take English for granted, but if we explore its
paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly,
boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither
from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends
but not one amend?
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of
all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a
humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking
English should be committed to an asylum for the
verbally insane.
In what other language do people recite at a play
and play at a recital?
We ship by truck but send cargo by ship...
We have noses that run and feet that smell.
We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.
And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be
the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are
opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a
language in which your house can burn up as it
burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it
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