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TOPIC:   NOT TO SCALE...A Cautionary Tale of Resident Evil 


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BIGFATGIT
BIGFATGIT's Photo Posts: 114
2/10/11 5:58 A

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Got plenty here Sass,

Or as they say in Fatfighters " Weeeed the low calorie alternative to alcohol"

Lol

PS. Stpete ....read today's blog....your answer is there!


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GARDENCHRIS
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2/9/11 5:25 P

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where is that high holiday? who's coming?



Nothing changes unless something changes.

I am a treasured child of the most High God
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SASSYJAY
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2/9/11 3:28 P

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We're gettin high? Who's got the stuff?

~Maggie

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ndividual.asp?gid=4459


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MOOKBALL
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2/9/11 10:39 A

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I am taking a high holiday from this discussion.

"Every man I meet is in some way my superior, and in that I can learn of him." John Adams Ruth


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GARDENCHRIS
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2/8/11 6:46 P

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Yea let them roll on outa here! emoticon



Nothing changes unless something changes.

I am a treasured child of the most High God
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=4459


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POPEYETHETURTLE
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2/8/11 6:16 P

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Didn't the change from stones occur when they started Rolling?

"A government big enough to give everything you want is also big enough to take everything you have."
-Ronald Reagan

Co-Founder, Dealing with Depression; www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_individual.asp?gid=953

Co-leader, Conservatives/Republicans sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=4683


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STPETEWOMAN
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2/8/11 12:27 P

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BigGit when did the Monarchy give up using Stones instead of pounds?

Stones were so great because you could weigh like 350lbs an only weigh like 7 stones. It was like there was no gravity in the UK. It makes you feel smaller.

Losing a stone was the just thre reverse. All that work and I lost .00014 stone.

But since I am from the USA we only pass stones.
Marian





GARDENCHRIS
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2/8/11 7:25 A

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well... I thought Popeye was rather succinct!emoticon



Nothing changes unless something changes.

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ndividual.asp?gid=4459


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BIGFATGIT
BIGFATGIT's Photo Posts: 114
2/8/11 4:31 A

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Oooooh Keyboarding.....

..sounds like something we used to do in the seventies!!!

does it count as cardio???

K


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SASSYJAY
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2/8/11 3:39 A

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Popeye and BigFatGit are henceforth forbidden from posting on the same thread! You two are giving me a headache!

(Of course, I expect you to listen to me just as well as my children used to...so THAT was a waste of keyboarding.)

~Maggie

Co-Leader of "Sarcastics Unlimited" www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=4459


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ndividual.asp?gid=38774




POPEYETHETURTLE
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2/8/11 1:31 A

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If you sucked in enough wind to get that sentence out, did you float away? Perchance to spin lazily, like a balloon, drifting into the atmosphere?

Right. Then you had to deliver those lines, liltingly. Each word gurgling across your tongue as you started to drown.

So you dropped like a rock.

I hope it was soft where you landed. Or, should I hope you landed on something softly. Maybe you landed softly, swiftly carried across the meadow on delicate feet, stumbled and bounced into a stack of hay, clubbed unconscious by the hidden fence post? Perchance, to dream?

Edited by: POPEYETHETURTLE at: 2/8/2011 (01:34)
"A government big enough to give everything you want is also big enough to take everything you have."
-Ronald Reagan

Co-Founder, Dealing with Depression; www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_individual.asp?gid=953

Co-leader, Conservatives/Republicans sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=4683


Co-leader, Writers www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=50375


 
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GARDENCHRIS
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2/7/11 9:13 P

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Did you just say something??



Nothing changes unless something changes.

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BIGFATGIT
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2/7/11 8:09 A

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Oh dear! Not having a good day today are we Chrissy? Should have upped the caffeine intake before taking me to task today.

As per my earlier comment in the other thread and in my new self appointed role i do feel the need to point out a few of your little foibles.

1 It is impossible to win a revolution!

You may have won the revolutionary war! but ......


2 The correct word is damn not dang!

The language is called English which is why we use the Oxford English Dictionary we are not Microsoft there is no English (U.S.) or English (Caribbean)....

Once combining the the above your third item should read as follows:

Her Majesty Elizabeth the Second, by the Grace of God, of Great Britain, Ireland and the British Dominions beyond the Seas Queen, Defender of the Faith, Duchess of Edinburgh, Countess of Merioneth, Baroness Greenwich, Duke of Lancaster, Lord of Mann, Duke of Normandy, Sovereign of the Most Honourable Order of the Garter, Sovereign of the Most Honourable Order of the Bath, Sovereign of the Most Ancient and Most Noble Order of the Thistle, Sovereign of the Most Illustrious Order of Saint Patrick, Sovereign of the Most Distinguished Order of Saint Michael and Saint George, Sovereign of the Most Excellent Order of the British Empire, Sovereign of the Distinguished Service Order, Sovereign of the Imperial Service Order, Sovereign of the Most Exalted Order of the Star of India, Sovereign of the Most Eminent Order of the Indian Empire, Sovereign of the Order of British India, Sovereign of the Indian Order of Merit, Sovereign of the Order of Burma, Sovereign of the Royal Order of Victoria and Albert, Sovereign of the Royal Family Order of King Edward VII, Sovereign of the Order of Merit, Sovereign of the Order of the Companions of Honour, Sovereign of the Royal Victorian Order, Sovereign of the Most Venerable Order of theHospital of St John of Jerusalem. Is across the Atlantic ocean


I just call her Auntie Liz though!

K.
X

By the way during your Bush Gore and the missing chads debacle a few years ago there was a wonderful email doing the rounds pro-porting to be an open letter from the queen rescinding your independence i will have a look and see if i can dig up a copy and re-post it here it is absolutely superb and my hat is off to whomever wrote it.

TTFN




Edited by: BIGFATGIT at: 2/7/2011 (08:36)

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GARDENCHRIS
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2/7/11 6:55 A

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BFG it is those Idioms that you keep using! Maybe you don't realize that the USA won the revolution?!?!? It is that dang OXFORD dictionary you keep using. The queen is across the pond, your in the wrong time zone..... WEBSTER"S is the USA dictionary!emoticon



Nothing changes unless something changes.

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ndividual.asp?gid=4459


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BIGFATGIT
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2/7/11 6:32 A

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Just a quick quip!




Yeah Yeah go Chrissy!

I think Popeye hit the nail right on the head!

Whilst most of us in here are a little warped. there are definitely Some who are totally Twisted!!

Your favourite TIC fan

K
x

Ps can someone have a word with the Spark guy and ask him to stop underlining some of my correctly spelled words in red? I've looked it up again and there is a "U" in favourite!!!! if he says no I want my cheque back so i can stick it in my trouser pocket!


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GARDENCHRIS
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2/4/11 7:18 P

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And what is wrong with being off kilter by 39 degrees??? It is my happy place! Don't you all think that maybe you are not off enough, with the possible exception of sailor man! There is no definition quite adequate for our very own Popeye! emoticon



Nothing changes unless something changes.

I am a treasured child of the most High God
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=4459


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STPETEWOMAN
STPETEWOMAN's Photo Posts: 54
2/4/11 6:51 P

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"Shouldn't it be "we Jews"?"

First, I am originally from Brooklyn, so English is my 2nd language...although I do enjoy the royal "We Jews" ( I am picturing me waving with the back of my hand while on a float passing Bloomingdale's) but I digress.

I have so enjoyed all of you and this thread.

To my new best friend from Chicago, GMACRM, I am so thnking of you as I warm myself to the smoldering embers of my hot flashes and some Florida humidity. As a former NYer and snow shoveller in Boston, I have divine respect for the melting properties of snow. Shovelling only destroys that delicate ecological balance. Dont do anything. Or as I say, Just don't do it.

To dear PAMBWS, how I miss those Jewish & a Greek bakeries....how long its been since I had a Baklava Knish or a Gefilte Fish Gyro. How I miss thee, Zorba the Moyel.


And to Popeye, who was awaken from a 50 year old Freudian dream of Guilt with Girls. Nachas (Joy) with Knockers (boobs) Reference: Young Frankenstein as in "Look at those knockers" Thank you for making me a part of your personal Barbara Walters Special. You are quite the tree.

Hugs and kisses to all
Please let me know if I am being sarcastic enough....
you know its all said with love and ulterior motives
Marian

Edited by: STPETEWOMAN at: 2/4/2011 (19:21)


PAMBWS
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2/4/11 6:10 P

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SPW - welcome (I guess I can be nice for a moment).

Good blog (OMG - still being nice)

As a gentile who grew up in an area that was about 50-50 Gentile & Jew - I knew & celebrated all the Jewish high holidays - teachers don't teach when 1/2 the class is gone. I also had to pass a Jewish & a Greek bakery on my way to school...no such thing as 'healthy' at either store...but wonderful tastes, textures, aromas...

And as for being tilted...well, that explains my limp!

- Pam -

Life is a highway...I'm gonna ride it & enjoy it!

ACTION: The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing. - Walt Disney


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CALIFSHEWOLF
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2/4/11 4:34 P

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Popeye....as a "shegetz" (non Jewish boy), you probably gave Mrs. Fox shpilkis (anxiety) at the very thought of you being her daughter's boyfriend, but I'm glad you got to know her father. My grandfather was a rabbi and no matter what he talked about, I always learned something interesting....even if I didn't agree with it.

As for the soup, the knowledge of how to make medicinal quality chicken soup is handed down from generation to generation, and I am quite good at it myself. I have cured everything from the common cold to panic attacks and it is our first line of defense when someone doesn't feel well. "Have some soup, dahlink...what could it hurt?"

No protective illusion, here, sir. What you see is what you get, and I have always been somewhat askew....just never measured the degree.

Life is too short for negative drama & petty things.
So laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly!

The best things in life are unseen, that's why we close our eyes when
we kiss, sleep, & dream.




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POPEYETHETURTLE
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2/4/11 4:00 P

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Maggie - I know that to observe the world through sarcasm tinted glasses makes us different, but lately I seem to have noticed that we all also look at the world as though it is about 13 degrees off kilter.

Has anyone else noticed this?

I know Chris is more like 26 degrees different, maybe even 39, but I haven't known some of you long enough to be certain I'm not seeing a protective illusion.

"A government big enough to give everything you want is also big enough to take everything you have."
-Ronald Reagan

Co-Founder, Dealing with Depression; www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_individual.asp?gid=953

Co-leader, Conservatives/Republicans sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=4683


Co-leader, Writers www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
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POPEYETHETURTLE
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2/4/11 3:53 P

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Shouldn't it be "we Jews"?

I just can't get out of the sarcasm mindset, CRACK! OK, now I have my vertebrae re-aligned.

I've had the pleasure of being acquainted and/or friends with a number of Jewish women. They have ALL been The Most Expert "Guilters" on earth, and I they get better with age (that's a compliment, not sarcasm).

I remember being in total awe of the first Jewish mother I ever knew when I had a date with her daughter in high school (who knew Fox was a Jewish name?). I was a wide-eyed virgin at the amount of guilt heaped on Jeannie at my first appearance in their home (prior to that, I had not known the word "gentile" could be a curse word).

Much later, in the teenage version of "later", when I finally realized Jeannie's life would be much better if we were friends rather than "boyfriend and girlfriend" (I'm sure Jeannie knew the instant she accepted my first request for a date what was going to ensue, and I'm pretty sure I was Jeannie's first overt rebellion), I became better acquainted with Mrs. Fox.

My memories of Jeannie will always be tinged with a bittersweet hue. She was an awesome kisser (in the oh-so-naive 1960 translation of the term "awesome kisser"), a super friend in any translation of the term, and undeniably the best guide I could ever have to a culture I had previously only known from reading the Bible.

And Mrs. Fox - I think she came to feel a little kindly towards me. She introduced me to culinary delights I'd never experienced. I've not ever been one who is hesitant to give honest praise, Even though her usual response was something like, "Oy, my mama was the best. My sister could tell you ... ".

Much later in life (when I was 22), I was stationed in Germany and I occasionally caught hints of Jewish culinary contributions to German food.

When I first started with Spark and was introduced to the concept of chicken broth with no salt or fat, I thought it was a sin. I could come into Mrs. Fox's kitchen with the flu or cold and she'd give me some medical grade chicken soup with homemade noodles and I'd be well before I left.

Mr. Fox, he was always cool. He was a rabbi and I was very familiar with the first five books of the Bible (the Pentateuch?). Sometimes we would talk before Jeannie was ready and he Always gave me a look at Scripture I had never considered.

SPW - No sarcasm. Thanks for triggering memories I hadn't looked at in a very long time.

Chicken soup with no salt or fat. I still think it's a sin.

"A government big enough to give everything you want is also big enough to take everything you have."
-Ronald Reagan

Co-Founder, Dealing with Depression; www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_individual.asp?gid=953

Co-leader, Conservatives/Republicans sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=4683


Co-leader, Writers www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
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SASSYJAY
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2/4/11 3:39 P

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Oh yes, it counts. As an activity. As an exercise? I'm not positive on that one. But if you can get your eyeballs to bulge in and out of their sockets...now THAT's exercise! Don't know how? Now's the best time to learn...and what else have you got to do? Maybe you can learn how to melt the snow with your X-ray vision. So many possibilities.

emoticon

emoticon

~Maggie

Co-Leader of "Sarcastics Unlimited" www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=4459


Co-Leader of Wii Dance for Fitness www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=38774




GRAMCARM
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2/4/11 1:52 P

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I'm laughing so hard my eyes are watering! Thank you for this hilarious message. Please do it more often. May not help us one darn bit except to brighten our day. Do you weigh yourself before and after your morning pee? Makes a difference. I have been housebound for 3 days in Chicago because of the blizzard but I am soooo fortunate to have a treadmill and bike to work-out if I want to. Of course, that thought has not materialized into an action yet but maybe after I finish with my SP messages and fixing some lunch and maybe a catnap. But then I have to get back on my computer to see what new SP messages have arrived. Does looking out the window staring at the mountains of snow count as an activity that I can track? Does watching my neighbors shovel count? Well, it's about 1 p.m. so gotta go fix lunch.


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STPETEWOMAN
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2/4/11 1:06 P

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Is the bread of Affliction.

I think us Jews just wake up and slap ousrelves in the face every morning incase the forgot something guilty, thought or actually done, that no one chewed us out about yet.

Who chose us? Its time for someone else to be it.
Marian

Edited by: STPETEWOMAN at: 2/4/2011 (13:07)

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CALIFSHEWOLF
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2/4/11 1:02 P

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Oy....and I thought my mom's homemade Challah was the bread of life...who knew about carbs back then? Welcome, Marian.

Life is too short for negative drama & petty things.
So laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly!

The best things in life are unseen, that's why we close our eyes when
we kiss, sleep, & dream.




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STPETEWOMAN
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2/4/11 12:55 P

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Well shiver me timbers! POPEYE (THE TURTLE)
First day here and first blog...hope my viriginity isnt hanging out.

Thank you, my parents, and praise be it to Challah, the Jewish Prophet of Carbohydrates.
Marian

Edited by: STPETEWOMAN at: 2/4/2011 (13:39)

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CALIFSHEWOLF
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2/4/11 12:55 P

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I care....because I have to get my other half to hide the scale when I get totally obsessive about it. I get on 5 times in an hour because I know that it is bound to be lower the 5th time. I care ...because when I have been "working my program" and denying myself the over-indulgent binges that are so emotionally soothing and I see a weight gain I want to make it feel better with a giant dark chocolate Hershey bar or a half gallon of Triple Chocolate Ice Cream. I care....because I know that I can't change 60 years of bad habits overnight and that ticks me off because I want everything to happen RIGHT NOW, dammit!

Ok, you get the picture. I understand and I care, but I don't have any advice that you don't already know. I did enjoy your post...I can relate to what you said and I did smile about how you said it. We are all in this together....and I am not being sarcastic.

Life is too short for negative drama & petty things.
So laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly!

The best things in life are unseen, that's why we close our eyes when
we kiss, sleep, & dream.




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POPEYETHETURTLE
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2/4/11 12:42 P

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StPeteWoman:

That was a perfect blog. Really humorous with touches of sarcasm popping up, sometimes surprisingly. It might well be one of the most popular blogs of the week.

I want to remind you this team is called Sarcastics Unlimited for a reason. Anything posted here REQUIRES a sarcastic response.

As for your post, we should care ... why?

"A government big enough to give everything you want is also big enough to take everything you have."
-Ronald Reagan

Co-Founder, Dealing with Depression; www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_individual.asp?gid=953

Co-leader, Conservatives/Republicans sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=4683


Co-leader, Writers www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
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STPETEWOMAN
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2/4/11 12:25 P

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I fall into this trap every time I have a couple of pretty good days of eating right and doing the water, hitting the gym….guess I’m just feeling a little too good, little cocky, or just want an old Atta girl! So to reward my efforts….

I FREAKIN WEIGH MYSELF.

This, I know, can only lead to evil.

There is no “correct” number this scale can hit. For example, today it went up 2 lbs.

Of course I own a professional, keep-moving-the-little-weight-a-little-more-to-the-right, doctor's scale as a “bathroom scale” is not heavy duty enough for a depressive episode I need to immerse myself in.

And with a bathroom scale at least you can “negotiate” a better outcome after 5 consecutive hops by leading with a different foot.

So here are my doomed day scenarios:

1. I LOSE WEIGHT! YES!

I lose weight even after downing a tube of Pringles,,,
interesting. So that means I have to have to occasionally carbo load to spark plug some weight loss action

A, I lose weight after a few days of being little miss perfect

WIGGLE ROOM! All of a sudden I hear my I “deserve” voice.

I mean I lost 5 lbs in 2 days. That’s not even healthy...rapid weight loss...and look at today’s flyer half-gallon ice cream 2 for one. Even God apparently agrees.

2. I STAY THE SAME WEIGHT….

“It doesn’t matter what I do. I cant lose weight” So why do anything? Refer to nutritional guide above.

3. I GAIN WEIGHT!!!

Nothing in life has meaning. Leave me alone. Go to the gym today? Are you high?
Really, I gained 3lbs. Really, Fine, I’ll show you what how a real pro gains weight gains three pounds. I’m not going down in flames eating asparagus and expensive salmon, that I baked, naked, no less, ---no oil, butter nothing. Bueller? Little Debbie? Anyone?

So this morning, after about 1 ½- 2 days of training like a star athlete, eating and journaling, drinking Lake Okeechobee, I did gain 2 lbs.

All of a sudden I was really way too achy and tired to go to the gym. Really. Swear to god. I “felt” hungrier. Which is why I am writing this to break the chain of destruction before it happens.

I like to think of it as seeing the last scene in a movie during the opening credits..

I just know I will end up in a gutter somewhere with agent orange cheeto fingers wearing smorgasbord of stains and crumbs praying and hoping Oprah anoints me with some prophetic “Aha” moment that catapults me to want to live my “Best Life Ever” or I will just cock the Honda fob and reload (at the supermarket)

And seriously, this happens, categorically, without fail, set railroad schedules to it, wake up the kids and yell to the neighbors, EVERY time I get on that scale.

So I really need to remember that my weight number is not my business.

Just have consistency, stay on the yellow brick road, dont look behind the curtain..

Stop grimacing every morning when I check out the 2 bats who have taken up residency on my underarms and sighing, I’m still not Michele Obama.

Or grab and mush my cellulite to really accent the “orange peel” skin mosaic.

Suck in my checks and hold back my neck for that facelift in a wind tunnel and then drop it all back in place like a Basset Hound..

not to leave out...pulling apart the top of my inner thighs to reveal my true bikini body.

And then just hit myself on the head with a ball peen hammer because that should pretty much complete the total emotional, mental and physical nosedive into complete helpless negative resignation….

OR

The next time I eat something “bad” or “REALLY BAD” or I hear angels singing my praises of Hallelujah…and want to go some where for a dose of fool’s validation I have to decide that I go

NOT TO SCALE!
and thats todays WORD.



 
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