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SILVER1369's Photo SILVER1369 Posts: 13,526
8/21/12 1:58 P

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Many emoticon and emoticon

Helen
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No matter how devastating an event, I truly believe that for every door that closes...a new one opens. You just have to be willing to see it and open it.


When friends tell you how awesome you look, drop the "I still have more to go" crap. You worked hard and you deserve the compliment! ~Jillian Michaels


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MOMMA_BEAR_69's Photo MOMMA_BEAR_69 Posts: 39,126
8/19/12 11:52 P

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HUGS and LOVE To all in need. My thoughts and prayers are with you...

Helen/Southwestern PA Joined SP 9/23/2007
Co-leader of The Rainbow Bridge--Grieving the Loss of a Pet Spark Team

"Without faith, nothing is possible. With it, nothing is impossible."
~Mary McLeod Bethune

"If you planted hope in a heart today in any hopeless heart, If someone's burden was lighter because you did your part, If you caused a laugh that chased a tear away, If tonight your name is mentioned when someone kneels to pray, Then your day was well spent.


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MOMMA_BEAR_69's Photo MOMMA_BEAR_69 Posts: 39,126
11/22/10 12:55 A

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You are not abnormal in grieving for Sadie...it has only been three months...not long at all. I know that I grieved for Tyler for over a year but it did get better. I still have times when I fall apart...but its ok. They are farther apart now and tears can be very cleansing.
You can not changed what happened, no matter how much you wish it were so. Sadie knew that you loved her and that is what counts. Do not give up on yourself. We are here for you and will continue to walk beside you and help you...if you let us!! Just take one day at a time...there were times I had to take just minutes at a time. We all grieve differently. Take as much time as you need and allow yourself the time necessary...

Edited by: MOMMA_BEAR_69 at: 11/22/2010 (00:58)
Helen/Southwestern PA Joined SP 9/23/2007
Co-leader of The Rainbow Bridge--Grieving the Loss of a Pet Spark Team

"Without faith, nothing is possible. With it, nothing is impossible."
~Mary McLeod Bethune

"If you planted hope in a heart today in any hopeless heart, If someone's burden was lighter because you did your part, If you caused a laugh that chased a tear away, If tonight your name is mentioned when someone kneels to pray, Then your day was well spent.


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11/19/10 11:11 A

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Pattie, I am so sorry you are shutting down your Spark page, I agree with TERRMOR and wish you would stay so we can encourage you. We know how you feel.

Hugs and love,
Sandi

Sandi
My hubby and I have just celebrated our 51th wedding anniversary, can't believe we've been married that long! We have 2 children and 4 grandchildren and live in Tallahassee, Florida.

Leader of Angels Amongst Us Team

Have a wonderful rescue named Zoey!


 
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TERRMOR's Photo TERRMOR Posts: 5,075
11/19/10 10:00 A

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You are not abnormal. I just don't want you to feel guilty.
It is so normal to be upset. I still miss my Bucky who died 10 yrs. Ago. You need to talk to someone. Your Sadie was IMPORTANT to you. She was your BABY!
It is horrible what happened. There is NO SET TIME for grieving. You have every right to grieve but you should talk to someone before you go into a full blown depression. That is something you need to deal with. I feel for you. I was just crying about Tanner 30 min. Ago. You will miss Sadie until you see her again. ((((((hugs)))))))

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11/19/10 9:31 A

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Apparently I'm abnormal to be grieving Sadie's loss for this long. Even my husband has given up on me.

So I will be shutting down my Spark page and retreating into myself. I give up because no one understands the deep pain and grief I'm feeling.

I will disappear.

~ Pattie ~

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“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.'” Mary Anne Radmacher

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TERRMOR's Photo TERRMOR Posts: 5,075
11/16/10 9:23 A

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Sadie knew how much you loved her. I know it is terrible but you should not feel any guilt.
We cannot be everywhere every second. This is how life is. My sister's husband took their Loopy for a check up cause he was acting funny ( husband left him to go to a meeting and was planning to pick him up) and she got a call that he had a tumor on his heart and is bleeding internally and he had to put him down immediately because it is a horrible death. I remember how she felt. She called me and was hysterical. That was horrible. She felt guilt but she said she knew Loopy loved them and that time without her could not possibly erase that.
Please try not to feel guilt. All the love you have given her could never be erased. She feels your love. You have too much love in your heart to feel guilt. Sadie LOVED you. She FELT your love too.
Terri

Edited by: TERRMOR at: 11/16/2010 (09:25)
Bamamom of 3

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11/16/10 8:17 A

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Sometimes I feel like I can't survive the pain of knowing my sweet girl died without me there. I worry that she was alone, and scared, and thought we abandoned her. We were driving to be with her, but she died before we made it. I hate this so much, and wish it was me instead of Sadie.

~ Pattie ~

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2014 Summer 5% Challenge - Teddy Bears


“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.'” Mary Anne Radmacher

Fitbit User ID: www.fitbit.com/user/222ZW8


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11/16/10 8:13 A

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I agree--our next friends are out there waiting for us to be ready for them. I sometimes wonder if I can survive this heartache again though.

Today is 3 months since Sadie died and it's like I'm reliving the terrible circumstances of that day all over again.

~ Pattie ~

Eastern Time Zone
2014 Summer 5% Challenge - Teddy Bears


“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.'” Mary Anne Radmacher

Fitbit User ID: www.fitbit.com/user/222ZW8


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TERRMOR's Photo TERRMOR Posts: 5,075
11/15/10 11:05 P

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Good for you!!!

Bamamom of 3

I lost 27 so far on WW



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11/15/10 7:43 P

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I am really feeling the heartache of both of you. I know I'm ready for another pup but it will also have to be my hubby's decision to. I just fell in love with the dog that followed me home my last day at our cabin. I really hated to take him to the shelter (a no kill one) but the timing wasn't right for me to bring one home at the time. I know there is one out there for all of us.

Hugs

Sandi
My hubby and I have just celebrated our 51th wedding anniversary, can't believe we've been married that long! We have 2 children and 4 grandchildren and live in Tallahassee, Florida.

Leader of Angels Amongst Us Team

Have a wonderful rescue named Zoey!


 
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TERRMOR's Photo TERRMOR Posts: 5,075
11/15/10 10:20 A

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Probably not. You will always be aware. I remember Bucky's last day and his death ( on my mom's birthday) 10 years ago. I am not nearly as sad and I think of all the wonderful years he had. He was 17. He had cancer that spread to his heart which the doctor never caught til it was too late and he probably was in pain the last few months. That made me mad for a long time. Then I remember how he still loved to be by me. I comforted him. He had a great life. I got Tanner 2 months after Bucky died. He helped me A Lot. When I'd miss Bucky I just got on the floor with a toy of Bucky's and let Tanner play. I'd hug and he'd squirm and bite and pee on the floor (I swear a puppy was harder than a baby). He'd let me forget for awhile. It wasn't nearly as lonely. I had a new little shadow. I'd picture Bucky watching over us and thinking that his death led to another pound puppy getting a home. Circle of life.
You will know when it is time. We are going to get another pup, maybe an older dog, in January. I miss my Tanner sooooo much but I think I am ready to love another in his memory.
Terri

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I lost 27 so far on WW



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11/15/10 9:36 A

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Terri, I'm having the same debate. I know, I KNOW, I would never give up the years of happiness I had with my Daisy and my Sadie, but the heartache I'm experiencing now is devastating. Partly because it might not have happened if I had a different vet, but who really knows.

I know there are so many dogs in need of the good home my husband and I can provide. But right now, it wouldn't be fair to us or the new dog. But I sure miss having the unconditional love and companionship of a dog. Maybe someday...

Tomorrow is the 3 month anniversary of Sadie's death. I wonder if I will ever stop being aware of the anniversaries, and remembering the events of the Monday she died.

~ Pattie ~

Eastern Time Zone
2014 Summer 5% Challenge - Teddy Bears


“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.'” Mary Anne Radmacher

Fitbit User ID: www.fitbit.com/user/222ZW8


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TERRMOR's Photo TERRMOR Posts: 5,075
11/14/10 12:55 A

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I often debate with myself on this. Are the years of joy worth the heartache? There are days I am not sure. I think in the future I am going to figure it out. I hope!
Terri


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11/13/10 11:16 P

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Awww, that is so sad that your daughter wanted to hug Tanner and couldn't. I know, it is so hard when I think about my Honeybear and all the love she gave me and now I don't have that anymore. I have friends also that say they don't want another pet because they don't want the heartache of losing one. I don't like to think about that either but just really miss not having one.

Yes, soon the time will be right!!!!

Sandi
My hubby and I have just celebrated our 51th wedding anniversary, can't believe we've been married that long! We have 2 children and 4 grandchildren and live in Tallahassee, Florida.

Leader of Angels Amongst Us Team

Have a wonderful rescue named Zoey!


 
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TERRMOR's Photo TERRMOR Posts: 5,075
11/13/10 12:42 A

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My mom and my inlaws all said NO MORE PETS. They meant it.
They are older and said they didn't want the heartache again. I don't blame them. I have a precious cat and we will get another dog but that might be all I can take. The next time might just do me in mentally. I would love to rescue an older dog like we did Bucky. I know they may not be with me as long but at least they would have some good years. Maybe a puppy and an older dog.
You wil know, as I will, when it is time.
My daughter texted from work and she was crying and said she needed to hug Tanner but she can't.
She was upset. I told her to come home and hug Bosco. He will give you a few minutes of his time. LOL
CATS ARE SO DIFFERENT. But we fell in love.

Bamamom of 3

I lost 27 so far on WW



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11/12/10 10:56 P

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Yes, the timing wasn't right for us because we were making the trip back to Fl. the next day and there wasn't time to have the pup checked out by the vet and this weekend was going to be busy with company. One day the timing will be perfect!

Thanks!

Sandi
My hubby and I have just celebrated our 51th wedding anniversary, can't believe we've been married that long! We have 2 children and 4 grandchildren and live in Tallahassee, Florida.

Leader of Angels Amongst Us Team

Have a wonderful rescue named Zoey!


 
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TERRMOR's Photo TERRMOR Posts: 5,075
11/12/10 10:32 P

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You are right. You aren't ready. I think we will be ready once the Holidays are over. I look at is as Tanner wanting me to help another dog so his death meant something. Tanner was born right around the time our Bucky died. We got him 10 weeks later. Life goes on and it is time to save another precious soul. Only when you are ready.

Bamamom of 3

I lost 27 so far on WW



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11/12/10 9:30 P

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Just sending hugs to you all as I know the pain everyone feels too. I still miss my Honeybear and when we were at our cabin a stray dog followed me home and I couldn't keep him and now I'm sad about that (please read my blog about it if you wish). He looked at me with such trusting eyes but I knew the time wasn't right for me to travel all the way back to Tallahassee with him. At least he is at a no kill shelter and they felt he would be adopted.

Hugs

Sandi
My hubby and I have just celebrated our 51th wedding anniversary, can't believe we've been married that long! We have 2 children and 4 grandchildren and live in Tallahassee, Florida.

Leader of Angels Amongst Us Team

Have a wonderful rescue named Zoey!


 
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TERRMOR's Photo TERRMOR Posts: 5,075
11/12/10 8:35 P

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So true!!!!

Bamamom of 3

I lost 27 so far on WW



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POOH_BEAR_69's Photo POOH_BEAR_69 Posts: 9,159
11/12/10 8:23 P

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I do think it's the unconditional love and devotion that adds the whole other element to it. It makes it so much harder to say "until we meet again." It is true though... There will come a day! Keep your chin up!!!

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TERRMOR's Photo TERRMOR Posts: 5,075
11/12/10 10:33 A

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Oh I know. It is such a devastating loss. This is normal to feel this way. They are like our children. They are the only ones we don't fight with, ever. UNCONDITIONAL love.
You can talk to us anytime. I cry every night and am sad a lot during the day. To be honest I didn't grieve like this after the funeral was over for my dad. I mean, yes I missed him and have wonderful memories but I didn't cry every night. I didn't have that empty feeling everyday and night. The only thing worse than this could be my kids and husband.
You are not alone and you can write anything down that will help.
Sadie is waiting for you but I like to think years of waiting to a dog will seem like a day. No time at all.
They don't feel abandoned.
Terri

Bamamom of 3

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CHRIS2141's Photo CHRIS2141 Posts: 50
11/12/10 10:27 A

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I know what you are going through. I remember thinking the day after Oliver passed that each day will get easier. Boy was I wrong. I'm sure you find yourself having some really good days, only to be set back by bad days. It's been a few weeks for me and sometimes it feels that the more time that passes, the worse I feel. It will get better though for you and for all of us. I know that time does heal all wounds, and it will for us too.

on a different note, I just noticed your weight loss goal and even your weight is the about the same as mine! emoticon

Edited by: CHRIS2141 at: 11/12/2010 (10:30)
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PUPPYWHISPERS's Photo PUPPYWHISPERS SparkPoints: (76,008)
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11/12/10 9:58 A

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I've been putting on a brave face, but I'm still so sad. I still find it so hard to accept that Sadie's gone. She was such a huge part of me.

On sad days, like today, I still feel like I'm losing my mind.

~ Pattie ~

Eastern Time Zone
2014 Summer 5% Challenge - Teddy Bears


“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.'” Mary Anne Radmacher

Fitbit User ID: www.fitbit.com/user/222ZW8


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