Hi Pattie, I am so sorry for the insensitivity of your "friend." I am sure they wouldn't say that to someone who lost a child. Our pets are our children and our grief is very intense and severe. I am sorry that you are having a bad day. Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. If it helps you to post some memories of Sadie, please do. I love to read stories of our furbabies. Sometimes we just need someone to listen...someone who understands. I feel bad for your friend that they have never had a pet they loved unconditionally or have that pet love them. Praying for you as you grieve the loss of Sadie. She was your baby and you couldn't have loved her more. Each of us grieve in our own way and time. Don't let anyone belittle your feelings. They are not walking in your shoes and evidently have no idea. Just know that we are here for you. Blessings and hugs.
Helen/Southwestern PA Joined SP 9/23/2007 Co-leader of The Rainbow Bridge--Grieving the Loss of a Pet Spark Team
"Without faith, nothing is possible. With it, nothing is impossible." ~Mary McLeod Bethune
"If you planted hope in a heart today in any hopeless heart, If someone's burden was lighter because you did your part, If you caused a laugh that chased a tear away, If tonight your name is mentioned when someone kneels to pray, Then your day was well spent.
Some friends, I'm sure, may be convinced they're telling you something "for your own good," but remarks like hers are just plain hurtful!
So many people really do understand what you're going through. Sadie was a huge part of you life, and it will take time for you to heal. You'll probably never stop missing her, but the pain will become less sharp.
Sue, on Florida's Gulf Coast
"Awareness is all."
"Everything is exactly the way it's supposed to be."
"Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next." --Gilda Radner
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference." --Reinhold Niebuhr
I know how you feel. I have been there and still am. I lost my Simba last year on my Thanksgiving weekend in October. I hate this month. It's all focused on death. I beleive he had a heart attack. His little heart gave out on our patio. It was so tramatic to hear him scream out his last breath. My husband immigrated me here to California from Ontario Canada with Simba 6 years ago. I have no family here except my husband and Simba. I felt so alone and fell into a deep depression. Nobody here understood, but my husband. I got the same comments as you did. It was so hurtful. I reached out to my church becasue I was hurting so bad and got ignored. I couldn't beleive the treatment in my church. Just becasue he wasn't a person doesn't mean it doesn't hurt the same. And on top of it we have been trying to have a baby for a year now to give Simba a little brother or sister. We are having fertility issues. Simba was the world to me and was like my child. People just don't understand. NO he wasn't just a dog! I know excatly how you feel. I don't understand myself why they are so hurtful about it. I will keep you in my prayers. I hope things will get better for you.
Pattie, I am so sorry that your so called friend said that to you. I would question her friendship as well. How insensitive. Those kind of people are missing something in their emotional makeup. How a friend can be so cruel I'll never understand. Even if a stranger were to say that to me I wouldn't think much of that person. We understand what you are going through and are here for you. I actually feel sorry for someone like that who never will know the joy a fur pet or any other pet can give. They are truly missing unconditional love in their life.
Elayne from the West coast of Fl. "Bach gave us God's word, Mozart gave us God's laughter and Beethoven gave us God's fire.God gave us music that we may pray without words." ---Unknown
current weight: 136.8
Fitness Minutes: (98,242) Posts: 65,200 10/1/10 1:21 P
Pattie, that is just a hard person that would say that to you. And certainly and insensitive one and I don't know that I would call her a friend. I am so sorry you are having a bad day. I just sent a message to a friend on Dog Lovers team that had to put her precious pup down. No one understands like another "true" dog lover. Some of my friends, I just quit talking to about Honeybear since I felt they really, not only didn't understand but didn't care how I was feeling. It is good that we have each other and other Spark friends who do understand.
Sending hugs to you today, just wish we could talk in person and that would help maybe.
Hugs and love to you, Sandi
Sandi We have 2 children and 4 grandchildren and live in Tallahassee, Florida.
Leader of Angels Amongst Us Team
Have a wonderful rescue named Zoey!
Total SparkPoints: 254,844
SparkPoints Level 23
Fitness Minutes: (161,418) Posts: 6,684 10/1/10 11:41 A
I had a few good days this week, but today has been rough. I had a "friend" tell me that she was just a dog and I need to get over it. She also said if I get that attached, I really should never have a dog. I know it's just words, and some people don't understand. But why don't they understand?
It hurts that people have either forgotten about me or ignore me. I feel so empty and alone.
~ Pattie ~
Eastern Time Zone
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.'" Mary Anne Radmacher
SparkPeople, SparkCoach, SparkPages, SparkPoints, SparkDiet, SparkAmerica, SparkRecipes, DailySpark, and other marks are trademarks of SparkPeople, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
SPARKPEOPLE is a registered trademark of SparkPeople, Inc. in the United States, European Union, Canada, and Australia. All rights reserved.