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4/25/15 12:40 A

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Sorry I was absent yesterday, especially with so much deep sharing going on. I was mostly just tired, needing to relax, and finishing a novel. (Pound Foolish--a parallel novel to Penny Wise, set in the Yada Yada Prayer Group universe. Pagan that I am, this is one Christian fiction series I enjoy.) So I had my reading cut out for me tonight!
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Eva, I feel with you. I would understand any reaction, and support any response, and I genuinely believe you chose the best path for you. Cruel, callous and ignorant people really don't deserve our attention or energy. It's one of the things that has helped me a couple times lately--deciding I wouldn't "let them win" by abandoning my joy. Or as I wrote in my journal (after that meeting where I heard I might be demoted) "OK, we're unhappy, we're grinding. At least some of us don't want to fall in that trap of letting crappy managers doom us to a miserable day. Let's fight back by having a good one!" Then the peanut gallery, as I call them, start chanting "Fight Back! Fight Back!" (reminiscent of my old radical political days). So glad you have fun things planned with Bug.
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Athena, glad you and Roy are consciously considering the options and ramifications of coming out, and happy one more person seems accepting of the situation. Too bad about your current manager, but all the better to move into a healthier and more supportive environment! And while the faster transition will be challenging, it also means you have leave the bitterness and start enjoying the benefits of the new group that much faster!
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Ashley, what kind of work do you do? How far is Cincinnati? What kind of restaurant? Have fun at the opening!
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I got caught up with some of my backlogged work, which was very satisfying. I now have no refund requests older than a month on my desk. I had to follow up with a couple phone calls on pieces that are being missed at the first stage when these pass through other hands, and I asked the Electrical supervisor if we should really deny a particular one, when I think the inspector attached his inspection notes to the wrong permit. He agreed with me and told me it was a good catch.

Yesterday exchanged positive feedback with the HQ meeting facilitator, and today mailed a thank you card with apology to the OM who I rode back with who has kindly listened to me vent on more than one occasion. I also broached the possibility of her acting as a mentor, or helping me find someone to fill that role. Felt a little scary (she might say 'Heck no!') but also strong and positive, cuz she might say yes. And while our supervisor left early, the Customer Service Manager was there at the end of the day, saw us finishing a slew of contractors at the end of the day that prevented pretty much everyone from getting their afternoon breaks. Since I had been basically reprimanded for "letting this happen" more than once, it was nice he was there to see that just happens when we're busy--because we don't really have enough staff to cover our frequent level of customers. Just last night I had to bite my tongue when I heard our supervisor claiming "we're fully staffed now"--because I don't believe we are.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/24/15 1:22 P

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Good Morning Ladies!
Eva, what a terrible position to be in. Letting it go seems like the best response. A quote my mother once said "You can't control what other people do; but, you can control how you react to it." You are amazingly strong. emoticon

Athena, Sorry your current boss isn't taking the news of you leaving so well! But it sounds like the best move for you especially with all the hard work you put in to get the job. Very exciting!! I'm very happy for you! You earned it! emoticon

Amanda, That's great you were able to contribute to the "End of Day" meeting. It sounds like an interesting and effective meeting to attend. And, that's awesome you got your errands done early to avoid the crowd! I love grocery shopping on "off" times. Makes it so much easier to get in and out. emoticon

Weather is a bit chilly in KY, but the sun is still shining. emoticon Work is hectic as usual, but hey, it's job security. emoticon Heading to Cincinnati tonight to support a friend of a friend opening a new restaurant.

Have a wonderful day ladies!

"All the darkness of the world cannot
extinguish the light of a single candle,
yet one candle can illuminate all the darkness.
- Jewish Hanukah Prayer

Ashley

Edited by: RUNRUN131 at: 4/24/2015 (13:22)
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4/24/15 8:45 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Eva, I think that it was a good choice to let it go and not give them the satisfaction of seeing you upset (especially if that was the intention). I hope that the card was out of lonely regret, but if it wasnt, then you definitely didnt give them the satisfaction of seeing it get to you. Its awful that family, the ones who are supposed to be close and care about us, can be so cruel. I went through some very similar stuff that you did in my childhood and it has destroyed the relationship I have with my mother. I am glad that I was able to listen and that you were able to achieve a new perspective by sharing.

Amanda, I hope all is well with you!!

Well, I got a call from my current manager yesterday saying they decided to move up my transition date from May 16 to May 2. So I went from having a few weeks to get everything closed out, to one week of having to rush to get everything closed out. I can tell my manager is a little bitter about me leaving because she hasnt offered any type of well wishes other than, "I hope you are happy with your choice to leave". But its just another example and sign of why this WAS the best choice for me. I need to be under a manager who wants to see me grow and advance, not one who has done nothing to help me grow in my career.

I think I told you before that the QA Director was my former boss. She used to be the Problem Management Director. She was the one that gave me all the training I needed to work more advanced problems, but when she went to QA, all that training and opportunity for growth left with her. So I am really happy to be under her again and think this will be another chance for me to continue to grow and climb my way up the corporate ladder.

I had a good yoga session in last night. Then I was feeling so guilty about not running all week, so I did a 2 miler after. I also found out yesterday, I won a free 5K race entry for May 30th. I am excited about that!

Hope you all have a nice weekend!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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MRS_EVA_K's Photo MRS_EVA_K Posts: 4,044
4/24/15 6:37 A

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Good Morning!

Athena sometimes we have to blow our calorie budget. the situation calls for it. your promotion would be one! You know how to keep it to a single splurge.

I can see how it would be hard for you to process everything you say about Roy twice. Once for the response and again to make sure the pronouns are right for the situation. You are trying not to accidentally out him. I hope Roy decides to come out when he's no longer depended on your grandparents for transportation. It's very dark to be in the closet.

I've decided that I'm going to let it go. Giving the mess a response gives away my power. and I'm done with that. And all abuse is a power trip.

I figure my grandfather passed in November and now Geneva (grandmother) is alone. And she's bored. So her card came from a place of lonely regret (she said some things that caused me to say "you know what I'm done."), or she's trying to invoke and angry response from me. Either way she's going to be disappointed because I'm not going to put myself in a position to deal with her emotional abuse anymore. And I'm not giving my Aunt the satisfaction of a response. Which is really what she wants.

But I appreciate your listening. Sometimes just saying the words (or typing them) makes you feel better and gives you a different perspective.

So today i'm off to the field trip with Brenna. I have her and 2 more children in my group to shuffle around the museum. Fun times fun times :)


"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/23/15 8:57 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Thanks for the congrats, ladies! Eva, I definitely was besides myself. After I received the news, I couldnt focus on my work the rest of the day. I found myself just sitting there staring at the wall.

My sister took me out to dinner last night and we had enchiladas and margaritas. Safe to say I blew my calorie range last night, but it was worth it. Roy came with us. My sister knows that he is transgender, but still uses his birth name and female pronouns. So she finally asked Roy if he wanted her to start using male name and pronouns, and he was like yes. Then she asked about letting his cousin (her daughter) know. Roy was ready for April to know, but after some discussion we were still concerned that she cant keep it quiet from my mom and grandparents since she is only 11 years old. So we decided it was best until Roy completely came out before she knew. Its been hard on Roy and I going back and forth with name and pronouns... harder on me because I really have to think before I speak. I try to explain this to Roy so that he understands. I have even told him if you want to go ahead and just come out and hope for the best, we can. He said he isnt ready, so we will do the best we can with the name/pronouns for now. I have been visiting my grandparents more often since they have backed off on the religious and political remarks and we have had a better relationship for it. So there has definitely been alot of back and forth between using Raven (which feels wrong now) and Roy.

Amanda, I am glad that your meeting at headquarters went well. I think with you being such and active employee with lots of suggestions and ways to improve, that they will recognize your hard work and dedication and hopefully it will get you in to a better place/position. Glad you were able to get home early and get errands done before things got too busy.

Eva, thats a hard situation to be in. I am sorry that the birthday card sent has brought up so many feelings that you either wanted to be done with or thought you were done with. I couldnt begin to give you advice on what to do, but I hope that whatever you decide gives you the closure you will need for the situation. I wonder what made your grandmother decide to send a birthday card? I hope it was only sent with the best of intentions.

I hope you all have a nice day!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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MRS_EVA_K's Photo MRS_EVA_K Posts: 4,044
4/23/15 6:41 A

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Good Morning and Congrats Athena! I'm so happy for you. You have to be besides yourself.

I'm glad you got some one on one time with Roy. It's always nice to get real time with your kid and not a rushed awareness that they are there. And I'm glad Roy likes drivers ed. That will make a difference. Of course Roy really wants to drive and this is his ticket to getting behind the wheel.

Thank you about the party and my little monster :)

Amanda I'm glad your meetings went so well. I look forward to hearing positive moves for your office. I doubt other offices knew how much you all had passing through your location.

Ashley thanks for the Earth Day reminder. We plan an Earth Day "celebration" but it will be this weekend. I want Bug to choose her plants and well I haven't made it to the nursery.

I have some awkward feelings on me. I don't speak to my father's side of the family, save one cousin. She and i are 6 weeks apart and talk occasionally. i have not heard a peep from anyone, except that cousin, in 3 years. So then Brenna receives a birthday card from my grandmother, sent in care of my husband to an address we haven't lived at in 9 years (Brenna is 7 she never lived there). Then my aunt contacts my mother asking if the card was received. So there comes a sniping contest between my mother and aunt that ends in a discussion about my sexual assault. (ie none of my dad's family were around through the assault or the resulting court dates. It was another year after the whole legal ordeal was over before I heard from anyone) It wasn't pretty. Anyway all this over a birthday card mailed to the wrong address. I've journaled about it, But the aunt made a comment about knowing all about what happened to me and all i can think is "what can you possibly know that's not hearsay?" unless he's gotten hold of my medical records, therapy sessions, or sealed court documents she can't know much more than it happened. no details were release because I was a minor. Anyway, so i'm in an odd spot. I don't know how to feel. part of me wants to let the "know it all" go and part of me wants to be angry and tell her just how very little she does know because she was absent during that time of my life. So i don't know.

Thanks for listening.

have a good day friends.


"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/23/15 12:48 A

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Fantabulous news, Athena! I'm so happy for you! I know you will be enjoying the extra emoticon an the pride and respect that come with being selected and recognized. Thanks for sharing your emoticon news!

Ashley, emoticon for your reminder and quote for Earth Day. So welcome! emoticon

I attended a meeting at headquarters as the representative for our region discussing the "End of Day" (financial reconciliation and deposit preparation) process. Luckily my supervisor had a meeting down there, and she drove us the hour trip by freeway. Her meeting was scheduled until 5, whereas mine was supposed to run until 3. We actually finished a little after 2, but I got a ride from the Office Manager who works north of us, who was swinging by my location anyway. So the travel all worked well.

It was interesting, given the very different customer flow, history and practices in the various service locations, trying to come up with standard practices for all of us that will satisfy the state auditors. Most of them don't deal with the huge amounts of cash we do at the end of each quarter, nor with as many customers period. Several only have 2 people who handle cash, while we have 6--meaning it takes us much longer to count everyone out and balance each day.

I made numerous contributions, and feel pretty good about my participation and the questions I asked. I also enjoyed getting to talk with my OM and the one who has visited our office before--who really wants to help, though can be a bit overbearing at times, wanting us to make major changes very quickly, without really understanding them. Since I began an hour early and only got a half hour lunch, I got to go home at 4 instead of 5:30, which was a treat--I made a gas and grocery run to Costco, which was not nearly as crowded then!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/22/15 2:54 P

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Ack!!

Sorry I am blowing up the thread today...

I got the call from HR, its official!! They offered me the position and I accepted! QA Director was able to get me a 10% salary bump, so I am excited for that too! Transition date is looking to be May 16th...




It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/22/15 12:20 P

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Congratulations Athena!! Very happy for you!! emoticon

Hope everyone else is having a great day. Make everyday Earth day. emoticon

"The planet does not need more successful people. The planet desperately needs more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers and lovers of all kinds." - from "wakeup-world.com" emoticon emoticon

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4/22/15 9:59 A

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Its still unofficial... but I got the position!!!!

The QA Director came by my desk today and asked if I was getting antzy? I said, "YES!!! Is it good news???" and she said yes and that they had chosen me. She said they were still going through all the approvals, but she had to leave out for Durham tomorrow and she wanted to ease my mind.

Still waiting on HR, but at least I know its good news!!!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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4/22/15 8:21 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Sorry I didnt get a chance to post yesterday, it was non-stop crazy busy from the time I walked in the door at work until I left. I didnt even stop working while scarfing my lunch down at my desk. This week is Lab Week at the Red Cross and we are celebrating all of our lab staff. QA and PM had the duty of getting together goody bags of sweet treats to give to staff. I had volunteered to get all the supplies, so ran to the store when I got in yesterday morning, then when I returned, I had to prepare for a staff meeting I was the scribe for and type up the meeting minutes to get out to staff after, and then get my normal work done. The day did go by fast, but I am still a little behind on my work.

After I left and got Roy we went to dinner and then some shopping after. He enjoyed Drivers Ed yesterday and was actually engaged and liked what he was learning. I wanted to get a run in last night since the weather was so nice, but it didnt happen. The quality time with Roy was worth it though. Once we got home I did some basic house chores... dishes, laundry, trash, etc.. and settled in to read for a bit before passing out.

Still no word on the QA position yet... I am hoping its any day now!

Amanda, I am so sorry to hear about the situation at work! That has to be extremely frustrating, worrisome and discouraging. We had a similar situation happen here when we were downsizing. All Supervisors were demoted to Associates in order to keep their jobs. Alot of managers were let go. I really do hope this works out in your favor, or you find something much better. Keep staying positive and I will definitely send some positive energy your way!

Eva, that photo booth and those pics of the party looked great and like alot of fun! I am so glad it was a success and little Brenna looks so pretty and happy! I hope you enjoy your lunch with your little Bug today!

I have another busy day here at work... getting caught up and a project meeting. I told Roy that I MUST get a run in this afternoon while the weather is nice and before the rain hits again, so that is my plan!

Have a nice Wednesday!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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MRS_EVA_K's Photo MRS_EVA_K Posts: 4,044
4/22/15 6:51 A

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Good Morning Goddesses!

And thank you Amanda. To save money I had about 12 hours of work time invested in that party and Jimmy had about 4. So I'd say it was worth my effort :)

I hope you don't get demoted. you deserve better. you really do. your office managers would do well to recognize you for the positive influence you are.

So lunch with Bug today, and field trip on Friday. My mother is driving with me to the field trip as it's an hour and a half away and i'm not much on driving that far alone. We're going to see the Titanic exhibit. In the mean time healthy activity and healthy eating. Thank goodness the birthday cake is gone :)




"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



~~~~~Co-leader of~~~~~
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4/22/15 12:07 A

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Loved the pix-- emoticon Eva. What an emoticon party! Love your birds and laundry thought, too! emoticon I've been loving the birdsong here, too.

Had a somewhat difficult meeting with both bad and good news from my supervisor. The bad is that I may get bumped back to my old position at a significantly lower pay range. If that happens, I'll have to drop almost everything else I'm working on to find a different job. My temp assignment was extended once, and can't be again. Either I'll be made permanent or demoted, and they haven't decided. My one year will be up when I'm on vacation, so I may not know until I get back. The really sad thing is I've never been given any real feedback or expectations to meet.

When I got home, though, I had an email from the union shop steward I spoke to after work of Friday. She had so many nice things to say about the documents I sent her, my passion, how I express myself--wow, admiration and support in the work environment: what a concept!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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MRS_EVA_K's Photo MRS_EVA_K Posts: 4,044
4/21/15 6:58 A

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Good Morning Goddesses!

Athena this is a weird suggestion about Roy and driving but, Have him pull his left foot up and brace it on the seat. if the foot is up while He's learning his pedals with you, he can't use it, that is unless you have a clutch in which case that's a stupid suggestion since he'd have to pop the clutch with his left foot.

Amanda it sounds like you are making some nice progress on your table!

Ashley how are you?

Yesterday I gave blood for the first time. It was a good experience. I'll probably do so again the next time I hear of the bloodmobile in the area :)

And here's the blog with party pics:

www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=5914989


I hope you all have a good day. I'm off for some normal. Outside my window sounds just like a disney movie, I wonder if I can get the birds to come do the laundry....


"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



~~~~~Co-leader of~~~~~
A Gathering of Goddesses



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4/21/15 12:15 A

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Ashley, is that your cute little doggie in the photo?

Can't wait to hear, Athena! emoticon emoticon

The party sounds like such fun! Can't wait for pix, Eva!

I got in my table sorting with the timer tonight. Actually I was going through folders and creating hanging files to go with ones I already had, so mail and papers I decide to keep have a home. It was fun, and I look forward to continuing.

I also got in 15 minutes o abs work and stretching--another activity I want to do more consistently. So I'm feeling pretty proud.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/20/15 4:53 P

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Good luck Athena! Positive energy being sent your way! emoticon

Hope everyone has a great rest of their day!

--Ashley

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4/20/15 9:03 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Thanks for the well wishes for the position. I feel really good about it. I am hoping thats a good sign. I am hoping that the salary will be good too. I should find out sometime this week. I am super excited and ready to know! I havent sent my thank you letter (email) yet for the interview. Since the only other interview they are doing is today, I figured I would send it sometime late this morning just so I can put myself fresh back in their minds. I actually decided to use my work performance review for the thank you email giving them the option to see what kind of employee I am since I dont know who I am up against. So if there is any doubt, I hope it seals the deal.

It has done nothing but rain non stop all last week and they are calling for more this week too. I am really ready for it to go away, because I havent ran since last Monday with my sister. She texted me saturday saying her foot still hurt, but we both think its due to her shoes and them not having enough support/cushion, based on where the pain is. We have yoga tonight, and I am kind of hoping for a break in the weather so I can squeeze another run in after (either with or without sis).

Roy starts Drivers Ed today!!! I am excited for him. I actually took him to an empty parking lot this past saturday to let him try his first time behind the wheel. We sat there as I walked him through all the signals, lights, wipers, gears, and then started with him letting the car roll in drive and practicing breaking and turning the wheel. After that he practiced backing up and pressing the gas. He was a little foot heavy in both break and gas, but I think once he gets used to the pedals, he will be fine. He kept wanting to use both feet to drive, and I told him that was a big "no-no" that he would have to get used to driving using only his right foot. He was wanting a big car, but he is short (only 5'1") and my car is a compact car, so after driving it and having a hard time seeing around the seats to back up he doesnt think he will be comfortable driving a bigger car. He still isnt comfortable with the mirrors yet and I told him it would come with practice.

I am glad that Brenna's party was a success!! Happy Birthday to her again and I know your happy to be not as busy!

Amanda, I am glad that you were able to focus on journaling and affirmations to keep yourself balanced and in a better place. I can completely relate to how you feel about that. I too will get into a negative state of mind if I dont stay focused on my goals and staying positive. I have actually noticed the big difference in my life in doing these things.

I have been journaling and documenting all of the goals I want to have come true in my life. Its a practice I have been doing since last July using the principles of the Law of Attraction and also working on the steps to make them come true. I have noticed that one by one, all of my goals have been coming into existence. It hasnt been instantly but over the months, but sure enough, they are happening!

Hope you all have a great Monday!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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4/20/15 6:32 A

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Good Morning!

Athena fingers crossed you get you position! I'm glad this interview went better than the last.

Amanda i hope that your talking to the office steward will bring change to the area. You've been so hard to introduce ideas. I hope someone finally listens.

I'm tired. The part was wonderful. We had 7 guests and brenna so that was 8 kids total. i have learned that you can give 7 year olds toilet paper and a large box and they are happy.

Now to clarify that, we played the mummy game. i gave them a roll of tp and 2 minutes to wrap a mummy, then they swapped so everyone that wanted wrapped got wrapped. They had fun. And My photo booth, after pictures, looked like a clown car, or the old phone booth game college kids played. They packed themselves in there. It was hilarious. it was fun. and the kids were happy. They enjoyed my creepy snacks, including salty bones (pretzels) and crypts with dip (carrots and ranch).

And now i am back to normal. Until Friday. I go one the field trip as a chaperon and mom is going with me! fun times :)

have a good day goddesses!






"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/18/15 12:20 A

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emoticon This is as close as I've found to crossed fingers, Athena. emoticon I'm so happy the interview went well and you feel good about it. emoticon on being prepared, and doing yourself proud! emoticon

I work really hard, journaling and saying affirmations on my walks, trying to stay in a good place, feeling empowered and focusing on the positive as much as I can. Sometimes it really makes a difference, and I can get to, or stay in a pretty good place. At other times, I succumb to demoralization and dejection.

After work today, I spent most of an hour talking to a shop steward from our sister office, who is working with the steward in my unit (a dear friend), on gathering info and concerns from our customer group, with the intention of addressing statewide problems as well as issues just in our region. They are starting to talk to higher ups at headquarters, as management at the regional level are not dealing with problems. It was gratifying to speak to someone who understands, is sympathetic, who appreciated my input (a few times she stopped me to say "Let me write that down!"), and who is working with a group to try to bring about actual changes (going beyond just venting and griping).

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/17/15 3:22 P

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Good Afternoon Ladies!

Just wanted to pop in and let you know the interview went SPLENDIDLY! I dont think it could have gone any better. I prepared for examples in dealing with difficult people and situations and was able to answer every question with ease and an example. I feel really good about it. QA Director said she decided to interview only one other candidate and that would be on Monday and I would know something before the end of next week. She wouldnt tell me who the other candidate was, and I tried to pry it out of one of the QA Associates who has said nothing but great things about me and has been one of my biggest cheerleaders and she wouldnt tell me. She did say I have no competition though so dont worry about it.

So.... it looks really promising! *fingers crossed*


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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4/17/15 12:56 A

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Best of luck to you, Athena! That evaluation does sound really positive, and is something to be proud of! Don't be afraid to toot your horn emoticon especially during an interview! Let them see how awesome you are! Sending many prayers your way!! emoticon emoticon

I finally got laundry done and all the clothes hung up. I tried multiple times, ended up going up and down those 2 flights of stairs 9 times before I was done! I'm tuckered now!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/16/15 4:55 P

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Alright ladies it's official, interview at 1 PM tomorrow (Friday) Eastern time. And I change my mind about giving them my work evaluation. I'm just going to study it and highlight my strong points from there and my work and my projects.


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/16/15 1:41 P

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Hello Ladies!

I dont have too much time to chat today, but wanted to see if you could send some positive energy my way for that interview. I dont have a specific date, but it should be any day now!! The QA Director came by my desk and asked if I got a call or email for an interview. I told her not yet. She said she wanted to interview thurs/friday, but HR is holding her up! It could be as early as tomorrow, but I have a feeling it maybe early next week. They finally closed the position today with 7 applicants!! She said 4 were external and 3 were internal. She still doesnt know the names of who all applied but heard there was a couple from Manufacturing. One of my co-workers said she heard a friend of hers applied who works in a different department, but she doesnt feel she will be anything to worry about. I did hear a rumor that my old supervisor from the Lab applied. (I really hope its just a rumor!!) She was really smart and brilliant and would be competition to worry about. So I will be going to yoga tonight and coming home for more interview prep work.

I did print of my work performance review from last year I thought about giving to the Director during my interview. I dont know if it would be appropriate, but people bring portfolios, so I thought why not? I dont think it would do harm. It has all the comments my boss made about my leadership skills and time management and multitasking skills and I got an "exceeds expectations" review, which is almost never seen. It goes into depth of all the work and projects I was on last year along with all the glowing comments from co-workers and upper management. I think it really paints a good picture of my work ethic and leadership abilitiies, since I am worried I will blank during the interview.

I will let you know more as I know more... but its getting ready to happen!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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4/16/15 6:29 A

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Good morning!

Ashley I'm a yoga person myself so I know how you feel. I think Yoga is one thing that has really taught me to accept my body in this moment.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to improve your health. That's just a desire to stick around and live a little more. Good health is a means for that.

Athena and Amanda I'm sorry about work. If praise was handed down more often then the rest would be more palatable. Just my opinion. What the head of any organization or business leaders don't get, without the little guy you are yelling at there would be no organization or business.

Today I have Jim home. We'll be making mice. I have a feeling they will be time consuming. Lunch with Bug the next 2 days and some various errands today. I hope you all have a good one.




"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/16/15 12:32 A

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Another great link-- emoticon Eva!

Good to hear from you, Ashley, sounds like you are doing well, especially in the attitude department! emoticon

Thanks for the commiseration, Athena! I'm sort of sad and relieved when others understand my work frustrations. . emoticon

We were down 2 people and the supervisor--all in training, and it got crazy busy in the afternoon; most of us never got our second break. I didn't finish with my last contractor until well past 5. Of my 24 old refunds waiting for action, I barely got one (the oldest, from 2/23) processed. They just can't figure out that a staff of 8 is not enough to keep up with the work load in the busiest office.

I took a walk when I got home, then just relaxed and finished my book, Infernal Blood, the 3rd volume in the amazing series by James Rollins and Rebecca Cantrell. It was unbelievably moving and satisfying, and I can't wait to buy this one for myself, and re-read them all back-to-back. Angels, demons, vampires, evil and innocence, love, betrayal, sacrifice, miracles--wow! One of the best books and series I've encountered!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/15/15 9:09 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

I am so frustrated with my work computer right now... Staff across the nation are trying to access the same email folders in outlook which causes the system to be super slow and freeze all day. My Outlook is currently "Not responding" and frozen and I have to sit here and wait for it to do something. Ugh. What better way to spend my time then posting to the board, I guess.

I loved the video Eva, and those ladies were definitely sexy. It makes me happy to see body acceptance in a world that is obsessive of thinness and beauty. I remember as a kid not caring (or being aware) about how I looked or the clothes I wore, and never thought there was anything wrong with me... Its amazing how that changes as you grow up, and kids start to tell you and call you names. I even feel bad and hate that I publicly talked bad about my body infront of Roy, because I see he has picked up the exact same kinds of feelings about his own body. I am happy though that I have taught him about how to eat healthy and read nutrition labels and know what kinds of foods to eat to stay healthy. We have our moments of eating bad, but he has definitely picked up the taste for healthy eating and we often get back there after bursts of junk food. We can tell the difference and our bodies feel like crap when we eat that way...

Wow, that was a tangent to go off on... I am still working on my own body acceptance and trying to be happy in my own skin even though I want to lose more weight for health and performance reasons (I want to be able to run more efficiently and actually be competition in some future races).

Amanda, I can relate to how you feel and it can be very discouraging. Since ARC has gone through this re-engineering program to save money they have added more work to our group just by cutting staff down to almost nothing. Then they want to criticize every little thing you do wrong and how the quality has gone down. Its like, what do you expect when you have cut the workforce in half and doubled the work? I couldnt tell you the last time we received any praises or thank you for your hard work and dedication. But when you mess up, boy you get an earful. Good luck, hopefully they will realize their error and give you a much deserved thank you.

Last night was a nice evening. I got home and cooked dinner then watched TV with Roy a bit while he was doing homework. He showed me his unofficial report card last night, all A's and 1 B (in science). He has worked really hard this year and held A/B honor roll all year. His grades have definitely been doing damage to my wallet, LOL. I then got on my bike last night for an hour. The seat cushion did help alot, but I had to sit straight up, I couldnt lean over like you see a cyclist do on the road. I was thinking of the possibility of doubling up on the cushion for a little more support. I am wondering if that is possible? I did get my sweat on though. Then I read for about an hour before passing out.

I am now wishing I would have ran last night. The rain was gone by late afternoon, but the sun and humidity was really high. Now its supposed to rain all day today, so I dont know if I will be able to get out there. Its only 60 today which is much better than yesterdays 80s and humidity... I guess we will see.






Edited by: ATHENAFOREVER81 at: 4/15/2015 (09:12)

It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/15/15 9:00 A

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Hi Ladies!

Hi Amanda, glad you got your taxes amended by the deadline! Sorry you are frustrated at work by the visitors. I've had that happen to--very frustrating.

Just work and enjoying the spring weather is going on with me. Feel like it's taken forever for nice weather to get here. Getting my garden ready. Doing lots of yoga lately--really helped me relax, strengthen and it helps me connect spiritually too. I don't know if anyone else can relate to that or not.

Never tried cardio after yoga! Might have to try that since Eva and Athena said it was great!

Eva, I am with you--I'm happy in my body. I love to make it stronger, more flexible and in general improve, but I'm happy. No self-hate! :) I love the link you shared too from mind body green.

Have a great day ladies!
--Ashley

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4/15/15 7:04 A

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Good Morning!

Athena I'm glad you enjoyed your run. I'm sorry about your sister though. I hope she's okay today. I find I like cardio much better after Yoga. I think it's because the muscles are lose, really loose. I don't run, but I like to belly dance (I suck but I laugh at myself and keep going. after all no one sees me) and power walk.

I dug out a Yoga ST fusion DVD (old as the hills) to spice things up and get more out of my time. April/May is busy for me. Biceps curls in warrior II. Feels weird but it gets me to do my ST.

Amanda I'm glad you got your amend done!

Remember today, you are successful. It's the planning and training that failed. Not you. Calling and asking for help is what makes you successful and points out the flaws in the new program's implementation.

I'm happy in my body and I wish all women were. if it changes then i'll still be happy in my body. You can be healthy in any size.

There's a photographer who's doing a series called "Strong is the New Pretty" It's about girls being who they are and I love it. It was featured on the today show but I saw the article on mind body green.

www.mindbodygreen.com/0-18337/moms-a
ma
zing-photos-show-daughters-that-stroR>ng-is-the-new-pretty.html


I'm a fan of what empowers us to be who and what we are :)

Book fair was a success. Brenna came home with change because the other books she wanted were sold out. So, I told her we would check the scholastic website. We came home and read a book about different animal feet :)

Today is some final party prep on my own. I'll have Jim here tomorrow (He takes direction reasonably well). Mom and Jim will both be here Friday. I'm not sure how much help mom will be. She broke her left wrist last week and as a south paw you know she's feeling stuck, but I'll find something for her to do. I think she can drop silver bb's on the cupcakes right handed.

We have 6 kids confirmed to be coming. I'm surprised! I figured 10 tops but I may be wrong as most won't RSVP.










"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/15/15 12:52 A

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I loved the commercial (even though I haven't seen the Victoria Secret ones, I think I've seen print ads with skinny, skimpily clad women with wings)--thanks for sharing it, Eva! emoticon with your support of companies that promote pride and acceptance of all body types. And these plus-sized women were definitely sexy!

Sorry your sister overdid, Athena, I hope she'll be OK, and be willing to exercise again--and speak up quickly if something doesn't feel right.

Good to have you drop in, Ashley--so what's up with you?

I decided the most important thing to dotonight was see if I could amend my free return that I filed online, before the deadline tomorrow, since I knew I'd owe a small amount back from my refund, which I had already received. It took me a while, and cost a little bit, but I have amended return and check to mail on time tomorrow--so lesson learned. (I gave more details in the Success Report thread.)

A somewhat frustrating day at work, with visitors from another office who keep telling us all the things we're doing "wrong" (different from what they do), and how we have to change so many processes. We so rarely get acknowledged for what we do well, or how much we do, but they sure like to point out every mistake--even when we were just doing what we had been taught.

This is my week for processing industrial insurance checks, and there are quite a few for tomorrow. We've recently had a bunch of changes thrown at us on this process which weren't well thought out, and don't cover all situations, so it's already slowing us down. And tomorrow I'm supposed to do something very different--except that I've never seen it done, they left no written instructions, so I'll have to try and figure it out as I go, and keep calling them to ask, "Ok, now what do I do?" Not really planning for success.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/14/15 11:02 A

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www.youtube.com/watch?v=RwxYW6mlTPk

I failed to edit the original link. It's a quirk here on spark. Her it is again and i edited the like in the original post. They should both work now. Sorry :(

My kid is a penny pincher. She doesn't ask for much aside from art supplies and books. I give her $20 for book fair and then $20 each month for a scholastic order. Plus allowance. She general spends her money wisely. If she has a friend play date or something that actually costs we cover that. (FYI I hate play dates. Kids are so over scheduled that you have to schedule time for kids to see their friends...)

Good to see you Run Run!


"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/14/15 9:28 A

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Happy Tuesday ladies! Hope everyone has a great day--or make it great! emoticon

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4/14/15 9:05 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Amanda, I am glad you were able to chip away at your table again and start putting together a "to-do" list. I love that you are getting some reading time in. I love reading. I just picked up a Lauren Oliver book called "Rooms". She is a YA author, but this is actually her first adult novel, I believe. I tried to find it on goodreads, but its not posted there yet. It seemed like an interesting tale about two ghosts who are stuck in a house they died in, and the owner of the house passed away (in a hospital - so he didnt get stuck in the house), but it shows the interaction of his family as they come to take care of his belongings. I am not very far in it yet, so I am not sure if I like it. I did enjoy Olivers Delirium Trilogy, so I have hopes for this book.

Eva, I tried to open the link to the commercial, but for some reason it wont let me open on my phone or computer??? I will have to see if I can find it. I cant believe Brenna has saved up all that money! Roy is the same way though... he hoards his money, and will have me pay for stuff whenever he can get away with it. When he starts to really want something though, I tell him he has the money and he can get it if he wants it. I usually pay for his friend outtings, but if he has the money, I usually make him buy is own material wants clothes, games, etc.

I kept myself pretty busy last night... went and picked up a few things we were out of at the store after work. Came home, cooked dinner and headed to yoga. My sister and I decided to try for a short run after yoga... OH MY Goodness... it felt so good. I had this energy that made me feel like I could go faster and forever. Unfortunately, I think I went too hard for my sister who is just starting back. She kept up and didnt complain, but told me towards the end of our run that she was really feeling it and had to stop. Later she told me the ball of her foot is hurting. I wish she would have said something... I think I was riding a yoga high I felt very peaceful and had relaxed energy. Went home started laundry and climbed into bed with a book for a few before passing out.

I was going to try to get a run in today... but they are calling for thunderstorms all day. I may use this time to do my bike tonight with some strength training and run tomorrow instead.

Hope you all have a great day!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/14/15 6:44 A

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Good Morning!

Athena I'm glad you seem to be the front runner for the position! What good news. And I'm glad you enjoyed Roy's play. It sounds good. Like a strong message that we are all different but we are all the same.

Amanda it sounds like you are making yourself an OO with that table. I'm glad you are making progress.

SMH = Shake my head. sorry one too many tweens/teens sending me texts. My niece and nephew have forgotten English.

Here's a link to the commercial www.youtube.com/watch?v=RwxYW6mlTPk

I always love when a company tells women to be happy with who you are right now.

The trampoline is 14 ft in diameter. It's pretty big. I never had a trampoline as a kid but it is fun. I've bounced on the little one a couple times. And it does burn some calories. We have Skyzone in Jackson that has adult only fitness classes through the week in the trampoline room. Very pricey. But I hear it's catching on in jackson.

i was a little sore from putting that trampoline together. the net had to be "sewn" on. with a nylon rope and tied off every few feet. It took over an hour. So i took an easy day of yoga and gathering and sorting party supplies and serving dishes. Most of it will be served on cake boards this year and i had to make sure I had plenty.

Today is book fair. Brenna asked me to divide her money for book fair and "something later" so i did. She saved report card awards, tooth fairy money, easter egg finds, and allowance. She's ended up with $60 for book fair. And she actually buys books, not junk. Anyway I didn't realize she has squirreled away so much money $1 at a time!

This week she went to the home library and pulled Eragon off the shelf. She's been really tired from school and so she picked a book she can lay down and listen to me read. Apparently the dragons on the spines drew her in :) I tend to read YA fantasy novels. and the ones that she can listen too or try to read herself are on shelves in her spaces. I love reading with her. For the last 2 months she's been reading me the bed time stories. apparently we've switched again :)

I hope you have a good day.






Edited by: MRS_EVA_K at: 4/14/2015 (10:58)

"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/14/15 12:11 A

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Thanks for the catch up, Athena, it's sounding pretty positive! Glad things have lightened up a bit, and that you let yourself relax and recuperate.

Sorry about those teens, Eva. Thanks for the new ad mention; I hope I can find a link to check it out. How big is that trampoline? I never would have guessed it would take so long to put together! I've never played on one. I think I might enjoy it. Oh, and what's SMH?

I put in a couple 15-minute sessions at the table, found a bill I had misplaced, did some filing, and started putting together a To Do list to start chipping away at. It's slow going, but it's progress, so it feels good and positive.

I am loving the new Rollins and Cantrell novel--it is so engrossing. I hope do some more reading tonight after a couple little chores. I will have to concentrate on not letting the time get away from me and staying up really late.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/13/15 8:41 A

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Good Morning Ladies and Happy Monday!

Wow, its been quite an eventful last few days for me... Lots to tell. Friday afternoon around lunch time, everyone was out of the office except for the QA Director and I, so I took advantage of the opportunity to go talk to her about the QA position and application. I asked her about it being an Associate III position and she indicated that she wrote it that way because she wanted to draw the attention of candidates that could qualify for that position, but depending on who all applied, she could change it to an Associate II position. In that case, which if I was hired, what I would be. That made me feel a little more comfortable because I didnt feel qualified to be an Assoc III, yet... She said they were getting ready to do a hiring freeze so she is trying to get HR to notify her of who all applied so she can take down the post and start interviewing this week. She said I had a very big advantage because I am coming from Problem Management and am Stat A Matrix Certified, but it all just depends on who applies. I am keeping my fingers crossed that no other formerly QA staff or PM staff applied, so I have the advantage. I wasnt able to get the salary range from HR (I dont understand why its so hush now, as it use to be no problem to find out the salary range for a position), but the Director told me. I currently make more than the minimum, but she said it should be adjusted based on years with the company and education. She said that she was sure I would at least get a 10% bump from my current salary if I got it. So, its looking positive.. so far. I am really hoping for a good outcome. I will let you know when I find out when the interviewing will be. She told me she would let me know how many people applied when she found out. She use to be my Manager a few years ago, so we kind of fell into a comfortable friendly conversation, just talking about how Problem Management has changed over the years and the "career ladder" that doesnt exist any longer for the department. She was really sweet and said if I got the position, she thought I would really like QA that even though we are in the same office, its an overall different environment.

Roy got the letter in the mail on Saturday for Driver's Ed. He starts April 20th... I got butterflies when I saw it, I cant believe he is old enough to start driving now. I guess I better start getting serious about looking for a car now.

The play was really funny, and I like it alot. It was about Spelling Bee contestants and their quirks and going into their backgrounds. There was an uber liberal girl raised by her two dads, the girls whose parent expected too much of her and made her study all the time, the kid whose parents and siblings thought he was too stupid to win anything and called him a loser, a girls whose parents were too busy and never around. Another boy whose parents were really hard on him too and was focused only on winning. There was some light cursing (damn, hell, etc) There was a racial slur I was actually surprised that they were allowed to include (spelling word was Mexican - definition - anyone who had hispanic ethnicity, including mexico, south america and spain) It was not well received by the audience, even Roy didnt like it. There was a moment when a boy was thinking about a hot girl and when he got up to spell his word, had an erection. Also, one of the gay dads was telling their daughter about keeping her stamina up, and the other dad made a sexual reference to him not having any stamina what would he know. Overall, it would not have been grandparent, or religious conservative friendly... They even had a black jesus scene where a girl was praying to jesus, and she was like, "I knew you were black" when he appeared to her. It seemed to hit on just about anything considered controversial, but was very entertaining.

I AM SO GRATEFUL that Roy does not have rehearsal this week because he will start Drivers Ed after school for the next two weeks starting on the 20th, but fortunately, I get to pick him up at 5:15, so it wont be too burdensome like last weeks schedule was. I got alot of rest on Saturday, woke up at 9:45 and lounged around until noon, showered, took the down out for a walk, watched some tv, then went for a 6 miler after taking Roy to the play for Saturday night. I felt pretty rested and enjoyed the day.

I need to stop by the store this evening and then yoga tonight. I will be glad to get back into routine.

Amanda, I am glad you had a good session with Katie.

Eva, that is tragic to hear about those boys drowning, I cant even imagine. I hadnt seen the new Lane Bryant ads, but will have to google them now that you have said something about it. I am glad that Brenna is enjoying her big birthday gift!

Have a great day!

Edited by: ATHENAFOREVER81 at: 4/13/2015 (08:47)

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4/13/15 6:46 A

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Good morning!

Athena good luck today!

I must say I'm proud of you for hearing your call to have some down time in the busy schedule you had last week You needed it. Sometimes it's healthy to be busy doing nothing.

Amanda i'm glad you had a good session with Katie. She is such a good fit for you. And I'm glad you are taking stock and releasing items that may just carry bad for you energy. I don't have much that belonged to my father (abandonment issues) and I have nothing but pictures left that belong in the house with my abuser. I have never actively thought about my decision to rid myself f those things but I can see how it would make a difference in the energy of your home. I do have several things that belonged to my maternal grandparents but I only have loving memories attached to them so I can see the attraction, now that I think about it.

I'm glad you found a nice sale on your favorite things :) are you having fun finding bedding for the new bed? I like shopping for bedding when the time comes. No idea why.

We had a busy weekend. My friend Sonia came and spent Friday and Saturday with me. We had some healthy talks and some healthy walks to go with them. She visited Spirit (Sonia was Spirits original human parent). It was nice all the way around. Saturday she wanted some exploring time, so Sonia went shopping while we went to a birthday party. I grew up on a farm so watching my child chase chickens that escaped from the holding pen at the petting zoo was fun for me (yes the family rented a petting zoo and had pony rides. SMH but whatever floats their boat.) Then yesterday Jim and I worked all day rearranging yard furniture and building Bug's trampoline she got for her birthday. It's early but she knows that's her big gift and was please to have it a week early. Jim and I work well together (apparently I take direction better than most people when it comes to projects I know little about). it took 6 hours all together (that's why the 1000 fitness minutes already) but it's done and we bounced for a bit before bath time.

Then I came in and checked the news feeds and found we had a tragic accident in the community. Twin boys (age 15) drown at a local pond. One decided to go swimming and wasn't a good swimmer. He went down and the brother tried to save him. Neither made it. It makes me particularly grateful for my Bug right now. So Sad. I didn't know the family but it's terrible for them to go through this.

On a very much lighter note. have either of you seen the new Lane Bryan underwear ads? I'm No Angel. It's taking on the Victoria's secret idealization of women. I like it. It's full of real sized women. :)


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4/12/15 9:36 P

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I did some shopping, used a Penney's coupon for another queen sheet set on sale, and more of my favorite bras also on sale. I also got a nifty gel foam pillow from the place where I got my bed and mattress--a floor model, so almost 40% off; I'll just launder the zipped cover, and always use with a pillowcase. That will be the last piece of my wonderful new sleeping environment!

Friday when I got to the mall early for my haircut, I dropped by the library there. It's a "browsing library," so it has some newer titles that don't go into the county-wide reservation system. I totally scored on some new books. The new China Bayles mystery, Bittersweet, (there are 55 holds on the other 19 copies in the system) was there, which I didn't even know was out, plus a Terry MacMillan and Dean Koontz (both from 2013) and the brand new final volume in the Order of the Sanguines series by James Rollins (a favorite author) and Rebecca Cantrell. It's a paranormal thriller dealing with Church history, vampires, demons and angels, featuring such historical figures as Rasputin, Judas Iscariot, and Lazarus, and we may be meeting Lucifer in this final chapter! I finished Bittersweet in just over a day, and I'm immersed in Blood Infernal now. I bought the first 2 volumes, Blood Gospel and Innocent Blood, and will pick this up for occasional re-reads, as I've done with others by Rollins.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

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4/12/15 12:39 A

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Athena, I so relate to stagnating in a job, and what it can do to your perspective. Wishing you great luck with the upcoming interviews. (Have you told us when they will be? If so, I've forgotten, and I want to be sending positive energy at the right time!) Very cool you are getting some good tips, and doing your prep ahead of time, so you'll feel confident when you go in.

I had a good session with Katie today. I was excited to share to the new bed saga, and she totally got the significance of dumping the bed I had used for so many years that had been my mom's, and therefore a repository of great sadness and loneliness, and before that my mom's & dad's--and the scene of one or more occasions of abuse. I'm rather stunned now that it never occurred to me that I needed to release it. Growing up poor, you just got used to making do with what was available. Now I'm looking forward to finding a new desk that suits me well--and letting go of the one she/they owned and used. I'm not in as big a hurry there, but look forward to letting go of that and any residual energy (and poverty consciousness) it may be carrying.

I also shared about the mental health day I took when work got to me a couple weeks ago, and how I used the time to craft a detailed outline of a number of my concerns at work--and much better and lighter I have felt since getting that out and onto paper--regardless of what is or isn't ever done to address the issues. I'm feeling proud of my growth, and enjoying the parts journaling I do pretty much every day with my morning coffee--how they are getting along and looking out for each other, making discoveries and acknowledging successes. So I was quite surprised when I quieted and checked inside and found a part who shed many a tear as she shared her fears about becoming independent and losing this beautiful relationship with someone who accepts and supports, guides and nurtures me in a way I never had from my parents or any supervisor with the state. (I just realized that my years with Waldenbooks/Borders has been one of my only full-time jobs with a positive relationship with management.) She was afraid I might never find those qualities in a more intimate relationship with someone I can lean on. That led to a good discussion of our therapist-client relationship, and the possibilities that may be found outside of that. Not too surprising that after all those emotions, I took a nap when I got home!
emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

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4/10/15 8:33 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Amanda, I agree with Eva, sometimes no news is good news. I hope you enjoy your weekend.

Eva, I am sorry to hear about your mother, and hope she heals quickly. I am a lefty too, it seems there are more and more of us every day. I dont think lefthandedness is as rare anymore. Its funny, whenever Roy and I watch a show or movie, I point out whenever someone is a lefty... he just rolls his eyes, but back when I was a kid I was always the only one in the class lefthanded all through out grade school and high school. Now that I am an adult, I feel we are everywhere...

I didnt do anything last night... and it was nice. I rushed home and got Roy back up to scholl for rehearsal. I came back home fed/walked the dog, made some dinner and relaxed and watched 2 shows and painted my nails before heading back up to get Roy at school. I took Hovie with me, and Roy was running behind so I walked him in the field around the school while waiting. It really felt nice to decompress and not rush to do a million things, even though I totally blew off yoga class. Tonight is the first show night. Roy found out he had to be at school at 4pm, so a friend said he could ride home with her and her mom would take them up to the school at 4pm. It will be a nice break to not have to rush home to get him up there. The show starts at 7pm, so I will probably try to get there at 6:30 so I can get a good seat. I am pretty excited about it and Roy said he LOVED working on the set and seeing all the rehearsals. He is really excited for it too.

Saturday, I totally plan to sleep in... and if I cant, I definitely plan to lay in bed until at least 10 -11am doing nothing, then get a run in, come back home and relax. Roy will have another show that night, but I wont attend this one, even though I will have to drop him off and pick him up.

In my down time, I have been reading the book 101 toughest interview questions in preparation for my interview and thinking of scenarios and examples to give mostly of conflict and dealing with difficult staff and how I handled it. I talked to one of the QA staff who was asking if they had posted the position for applications and I told her I applied on Monday. She gave me some tips on what types of questions they would most likely ask. I am really anxious about this interview... I think its because the position I really want. But also, I noticed that in all my prior jobs I have been able to advance in the company so easily without any issues. Any job I applied for or promotion I asked for I got. Once I got to this department, I stagnated, and no matter how much or how well I do something, I cant seem to advance anywhere. Over 5 years of no growth... I realized it has hit my self esteem and confidence tremendously... I used to never doubt myself and knew my potential and my abilities and my intelligence but now I find myself questioning everything and thinking I am not good enough. It is something I am working to overcome and hate that that is the mentality that this current position has given me.

Hope you all have an awesome weekend! Happy Birthday to Brenna on Saturday!!!


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4/10/15 6:29 A

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Good Morning Goddesses!

Thank you both :) I just try to keep the curious mind engaged so she stays curious. I'm still curious, even as an adult and i think it's good for me. :)

Athena I think Roy's play sounds very interesting. Like Amanda I'm glad that Roy realized the play wouldn't be well received by your grandparents. Maybe one day they will find their lesson in acceptance.

B vitamins are your mood and energy vitamins. But where you are Uber busy you'll be tired regardless. You might consider a supplement if you don't already take one.

Amanda sometimes no news is good news. It means all is well :)

My mother fell at work yesterday and broke her left wrist. She's left handed so it's going to be tricky. She's in a pretty pink cast though. So today i drive her to her plant to turn in paperwork, and then i meet my friend Sonia for a girls day until pickup time for Brenna. I'm happy to see her. I met her here on Sparks about 3 years ago. I haven't seen her in a year. Seems like ages ago.

Have a good weekend. it's cool off here again so maybe we can enjoy the weekend.


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4/10/15 12:39 A

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I agree that you are a great mom that any teacher would appreciate, Eva. The ways you interact with and encourage and inspire Brenna are wondrous, and teachers love to witness and benefit from such nurturing!

The play sounds really interesting, Athena! Glad Roy realized it would not be the right place for the relatives (their loss). Did you ever see the movie Akeela (sp) and the Bee? Really good.

Nothing special to report--pretty much more of the same from yesterday: a pretty good day with a trip to the library instead of Costco after work. Got through some more papers on the dining table. Tomorrow I get my hair trimmed after work.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/9/15 9:14 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Yes, I agree! I am way too busy, definitely not by choice!!! I will be glad with this next week and a half is over with and everything and return to some type of normalcy! I did go for a run last night. It was way too warm for only 2.5 weeks into Spring at 83 degrees. I decided to go ahead and do the six mile loop and crapped out at 4.5 miles and had to walk/jog (more walking than jogging) the last 1.5 miles. I was glad to have it done, and I did feel more relaxed and not so frazzled. I went home and showered and then went and picked Roy up. He was sweet when he got home and saw that I was too tired to do anything but crawl into bed and he made me a peanut butter sandwich for dinner (because I was just going to skip dinner and go to bed, I was so tired, I didnt even want to make food to eat). Passed out at 9 pm.

I did receive my bike seat cushion from Amazon last night, and it is nice! I cant wait to really try it out. Unfortunately my sits bones are too sore still from that extremely hard seat, so I think I need to wait a few days to let it heal before I can ride completely pain free.

I joined the 5% Spring Weightloss Challenge this go round, and decided to do an early weigh in. I have lost 3.5 lbs, LOL. I guarantee almost all of it is water weight. It was my TOM on weigh in day and I weighed alot higher than I should have from cramping and bloating. I knew it wasnt accurate, but had to go with the scale reading so it makes me look like I have lost alot more than I really did. I would say at most, I probably only lost 1-1.5 lbs.

Eva, you are very crafty and deal savvy. I am glad you were able to make the photo booth at such minimal cost... you maybe right about the B vitamins and the shrimp. It does sound like you are a fun mom with all the activities you do with Brenna, especially the educational ones! She is one lucky girl to have you as a mom.

Amanda, the play that Roy is helping with is called "The Spelling Bee". I know it sounds a little weird for a high school play (at least it did to me), but Roy said it was really good and I would enjoy it. The cookout I was supposed to do last weekend with my grandparents was cancelled because my grandmother was sick. We were supposed to do it this friday night, but then I had to cancel again because of the play on Friday. I had thought about inviting them, but Roy said it would be a BAD idea. He said that the play goes through each person in the spelling bee's background and there are some gay references and a very mild sexual reference. Plus everyone at school calls him Roy and we are still in the closet. (That slipped my mind through the tired haze I have been traveling through this week.) Yeah, anyways, my grandparents would be very uphauled by it, I am sure... but now I am more curious and interested about it.

Have a great Thursday, Ladies!





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4/9/15 6:51 A

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good morning!

Athena you are too busy. I'm worn out just listening to it. Shrimp is also high in low fat protein, and b vitamins. I'm betting your b6 or b12 is just a little low.

When my iron is low (I'm anemic at times) I crave spinach and red meat. But as a standard I'm more of a fish and chicken person.

Amanda I'm glad you had a good and productive day yesterday :)

And yes it is amazing what we retain from years ago.

Thank you about the box, ladies. I'm proud of it. That box started out in my mom's plant to be broken down and sent for recycling. She literally pulled that thing from the trash. She saved me $40 because otherwise I would have had to buy a wardrobe box from U-haul. I think I have $15 and 3 hours work in that box. There's a lot of dry time in between but i moved on to other projects so I can't count that.Took longer to cut the hole than I expected. If I buy one pre done it'll cost me $150. The little tutu was done during Janurary. We had a day of ice and sleet. Jim and Brenna played with legos and i spent 4 hours tying a tutu. If I buy it custom it would have been $35(?) but I have about $10 in it. I think it's obvious I have more time than I have money LOL.

Had lunch with Brenna yesterday. The teacher told me I was a fun mom. During spring break we caught caterpillars and observed them, and looked up the kind of moth/butterfly they would become. Brenna drew pictures with names. She told the teacher what we did. Apparently keeping her engaged has turned me into fun. And here i thought I was just keeping us from wasting away in the house. Anyway it was a good compliment and it made me feel good. Particularly as tired as i am from all this party prep.


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4/9/15 12:29 A

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Wow, you *are* busy, Athena! Try not to burn out. Looking forward to hearing about the play--what is it? Kudos to Roy for all the hard work!

Loved the blog pix, Eva! Can't wait to see the kids enjoying all your hard work! And thanks for the marine biology lesson! ;o) Funny the things that can stick with us from old jobs (like Texas ZIP codes from my stint at the Post Office in Dallas 35 years ago!

Costco for a few groceries after work, 15 minutes of table clearing, a short ST session. And a pretty good day at work.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/8/15 8:54 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

I am so tired... is it Friday yet? Roy's extracurriculars are going to be the death of me, LOL, but I am glad he is active and involved in school... it will look good on his college apps. He has rehearsal tonight and tomorrow, and then the show will be friday and saturday night. I dont know anything about practice next week, yet. (god, I hope not) Then next friday and saturday night again for the play. I am going to go see it this friday night because he really wants me to see it and he thinks its really good. He has been wore out too, not getting home until 8:30pm every night and then having to stay up late to do homework, poor guy. But I love that he is sticking to it and dedicated. We are just both wore the eff out though...

Eva, I posted on your blog. That photo booth looks amazing!! You really did an awesome job and I know you have to be proud of it. I know Brenna will love it. You always get me wanting to get back into crafting! I didnt realize that shrimp was high in iodine, maybe that is what I am lacking then??

I have mixed feelings about oysters... I will NEVER eat them raw or from the shell (they look slimey and gross!!!) However, my ex-MIL made an oyster stew that was SO GOOD. It had a heavy cream broth though that hid the texture of the oysters, it was great with cornbread.

Amanda, I am glad you made a dent on your dining room table and a yummy soup to enjoy. I have come to realize that I cant eat canned soup anymore... it just tastes too gross and processed to me. I now have to make my own (or buy in the bag and add water to make on the stovetop) and have been trying to find different recipes. I have a potato soup and a beef vegetable and a minestrone so far... but would love to try to make more.

Today is another day of hell in running around... Roy said he had to be at school at 4pm, but knows I wont make it home before 4:15 so he told them he would be late... After that, I will come home and feed/walk Hovie and then go for a run. I did a 2 mile walk on lunch yesterday but that was the extent of my exercise for the day. It supposed to be 83 outside and humid. Not too happy about that, but I do want to run the 6 mile loop and decompress and get lost in my thoughts and relax. Funny isnt it?? Running is relaxing... LOL.

Going to start my day... hope you all have a good one!

Edited by: ATHENAFOREVER81 at: 4/8/2015 (08:57)

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4/8/15 6:52 A

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Good morning!

Athens I'm worn out just from listening to you!

Prawns and shrimp are different species. Has to do with gill structure i think. Prawns are a little sweeter when cooked and more substantial to grill. But can be interchanged in recipes. One of my 3 jobs in college was waiting tables at a seafood place. So you pick stuff up, like the difference between cooking certain fish certain ways, prawns, and the horseradish getting hotter in acid. Also learned how to make umpteen sauces. Handy to know now :)

Athena shrimp is heavy on the iodine. It's a substance you do need for healthy bile? maybe. Anyway that's probably what you are craving.

And if you ever shuck an oyster (i have) you'll never eat another one *shiver*

Sounds like you two are very busy. I cleaned carpets yesterday for 3 hours. So much fun.

I also made the blog with the doll box in int. plus bug's outfit. I made the tutu.

www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
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after this party I get to start making a she-ra costume for halloween. :)

i have a friend coming in tomorrow afternoon and she'll be here until early Sunday morning. So excited. In the mean time Yoga, cake baking, and gift wrapping. Oh My! I love Brenna's parties but man I need a vacation when I'm done :)






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4/8/15 1:14 A

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Yep on the prawns = big shrimp, Athena emoticon At least I use them interchangeably except for size. (Could be a separate species, I guess.) I love seafood: crab and scallops best, then shrimp & clams, lobster and mussels OK, not an oyster fan.

I didn't know that about the cocktail sauce, Eva, but I totally believe it, cuz it burned last night! Bug is so precious, wanting a gift the family can enjoy for healthy exercise. Such a sweetheart! emoticon

Worked on my dining table for a little while this evening, tossing papers, going through old mail, filing. Lots more to do, but I made a little dent. emoticon
I also made some excellent soup with lots and lots of veggies--so good! emoticon
Also got a short session of ST in emoticon
So I'm happy making progress in my babystepping way! emoticon emoticon emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

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4/7/15 8:26 A

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Good Morning Ladies,

Amanda, prawns are like large shrimp, right? I believe I have had some prawn rolls before at an asian restraurant I like and they were yum. I love shrimp, it is something I always have in my freezer to eat. More so here lately which makes me wonder if they have a nutrient I have been deficient in since I crave it so much.

Eva, glad you were able to wrap up the spring cleaning. Good luck in putting the trampoline together, I bet Brenna is excited about that! I had one as a kid and loved it. I spent many a afternoons on it and had several battle wounds too from being too daring. That was before they came with those huge safety nets people put around them now.

I had an extremely busy day yesterday and overslept today because of exhaustion, I am sure. I had alot of energy though to get it done. Roy texted me at noon and said they are doing dress rehearsal for the play at school all week, so he has to be there from 4:30-8pm starting last night until thursday, I believe. I had to rush home after work with only time enough to pick him up and take him to school and drop him off. Then I came home and fed and walked Hovie for about 30 minutes, changed, and met my sister in the park for a 2 mile run. I wanted to go home and cook dinner after and everything was frozen in the freezer (I didnt set anything out) so I stopped by the grocery store to pick up a pack of chicken breast, and then my grandmother called me while I was there and said she had received a bunch of chicken and steak that had been donated to their church from chipotle and asked if I wanted some. I said sure and stopped by. I picked up a gallon sized bag half filled with cooked and chopped steak and a gallon bag of chicken that looked like small breasts that hadnt been cut yet. I looked up the nutrition facts on their website and 4 oz of steak is 6.5 fat, while chicken is 7 grams fat, so it wont be too unhealthy to eat if I portion control. Then I got stuck there for an hour helping my grandfather with his computer and didnt have time to go home and cook before getting Roy from school. So I went home, grabbed Hovie, so he could go for a car ride (he was super excited plus I felt bad from leaving him home alone all day) and went and got Roy. I got home at about 8:20, at this time, it was too late to cook, so I warmed up a serving of the steak and put it in a tortilla with the light sour cream and reduced fat cheese and ate that with a side of cooked spinach (dinner of champs, am I right??? LOL) It was good. The meat was well seasoned and spicy, so no salsa or taco sauce was needed. I then got on my bike for about 20 minutes while watching a tv show. It was all I could handle because the seat is so hard, it hurts my bum. I did order a seat cushion last night from amazon for $9, it should be here tomorrow (love Prime). It had good reviews and people said they noticed the difference and were able to ride much longer once using the seat cushion. Passed out around 10pm.

Today is rinse and repeat.... I need to get dog food today, I have to go to a pet store for it because its not something target, walmart or the grocery stores carry. Plus if it doesnt rain like they are calling it to ALL week, then I am going to try to squeeze another run in. No issues after last nghts run except a little stiffness thats gone now.

Okay, I have rambled on too long.... hope you all enjoy your day!

Edited by: ATHENAFOREVER81 at: 4/7/2015 (08:29)

It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/7/15 6:44 A

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Good Morning!

Athena Only one piece huh? LOL yeah I'm sure that something along the lines of "Oh crap" came to mind when you looked in the box. it would have to mine. Good luck with your QA application and keep us posted!

Amanda the horseradish in you sauce gets hotter as it marinates in the acid from the tomato base. Happens to all of it. Keep it long enough in the fridge and it'll clear out your sinuses :)

Well today i'll finish the spring cleaning. i just have the carpets left. I have a friend coming in to visit this weekend and if the weather is nice we'll be putting Brenna's trampoline together. That's her big birthday gift. Her birthday is next Saturday. She'll be getting it early but it's not something we can haul down to the civic center where the party will take place. Anyway i was rather impressed with her reason for wanting it. She said she wanted a trampoline that the whole family can bounce on because it's healthy fun :)

I'll be putting up the doll box pictures on a blog later today. I'm rather proud of it.






"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/6/15 11:28 P

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Athena, glad to hear you sounding so positive and upbeat about the job opportunity! Wishing you oodles of luck and confidence.

How cool that you could offer concrete ideas and support, and hopefully allay some of your FIL's fears, Eva.

I'm relieved the cooked prawns I bought this weekend were still good (I just forgot about them!) I just had them cold, dipped in cocktail sauce for dinner. I'm also glad the cocktail sauce--Ivar's with lime--hadn't turned, but boy was it *really* hot. I think sitting for months in the jar somehow increased the heat!

Got to a few small chores tonight, will probably hit Costco tomorrow (since they were closed Easter). Almost out off honey, and they have a good price.

I am feeling those isometric exercises in a few muscles!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/6/15 8:27 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Back to work for me today... I enjoyed my time off so much I almost didnt want to come back! I dont have too long to write today as I will be playing catch up all week, but wanted to say hello.

Eva, I did get the bike put together. It took an hour and one blonde moment, but its up and ready to go. I did ride it for 20 minutes on friday and it gave me a sore tushy. I need a seat cushion for it, but I know this is typical of stationary bikes. I posted a picture of it in my blog. Saturday I ran 6.2 miles, even though I said I wouldnt run that length of distance. I was feeling pretty good though sluggish. I didnt have any pain at all from the hip, hammy or knee while running, though the hip was sore and stiff after. I was completely pain free the next day. Yoga was cancelled for tonight so my sister and I are going to get together for a short run.

Well, I did it. I applied for the QA position this morning. I read through the qualifications and felt like I was a perfect candidate for it! I completely revamped my resume and am super proud of it. I hope it does the trick to impress. I will be spending all this week with my two library books of interview questions to be able to brainstorm some scenarios and think of how I would answer specific questions. I feel really good about this, I am scared and nervous though...

Hope you all have a nice Monday!

Edited by: ATHENAFOREVER81 at: 4/6/2015 (08:28)

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Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/6/15 7:10 A

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Good morning!

Shadow I'm sorry to see you go but I do understand we must each find our own path. I hope you come back to let us hear from you and how you are doing.

Athena did you get your bike put together? It sounds like you had a good weekend:) How was your cook out?

Amanda I'm glad work interactions went well and you were recognized for doing well with customer interaction. Your understanding nature i'm sure helps a great deal when you have customers that are upset. And that was a big man to apologize :)

Don't feel guilty about not getting much done. you shouldn't feel guilty. it causes emotional clutter that isn't necessary. Particularly if you haven't actually done anything wrong.

We had a good weekend. Both dinners went well and the kids were happy. I actually made it through yesterday without being fussed at about church. Which is unusual.

I found out my FIL has been diagnosed diabetic. He's being sent next week to speak to a nutritionist. he's dreading it and I told him a lot of stuff can just be swapped out for a healthier version. I told him it's not about deprivation. It's about moderation. And i told him I'm available if he needs any advice beyond the nutritionist.

Have a good day!









"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/6/15 12:07 A

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I try not to feel guilty for not accomplishing more on weekends like this. I got caught up on a few chores, then relaxed with a bunch of reading. I did try some new isometric exercises I found here on Spark.

I've been reading more o Catherine Anderson's Comanche series, and I've been very impressed. Not only does she delve deeply and respectfully into tribal attitudes and beliefs, she deals frankly with racism and abuse against women. The idea of letting yesterday be "as dust" behind you, and focusing only on this moment and in looking forward to the horizon is both intriguing and attractive. I wonder if I can do more to release the past and prevent it from limiting what I feel I can do and have.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/5/15 12:23 A

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Getting caught up on some chores and doing some fun reading. Doing food prep for future meals. Not exciting, but satisfying.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/4/15 1:10 A

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I firmly believe we must all find our own way, and the tools that work for us. I tried repeatedly to get sober with AA, but it didn't work for me, and I finally did it on my own. Whereas Spark People and babysteps are how I made the transition from obesity to the low overweight range. (I think I managed a healthy weight for a few weeks only, but that's OK.) I always appreciate when Spark buddies let us know when the frustration gets too much so that we can express our encouragement, support, love and understanding. Then whether the decision is made to say goodbye, or a reason is found to stay, it is clear to all that the door is always open. I also hope we'll hear from you again, Shadow.

I made some inroads at work, got some caught up with my fitness challenge (at work) tracking, even ran some numbers for a coworker who is responsible for reviewing our contractor transactions. She's the newest "super user" w/ special access & tasked with catching errors. So I compared the 3 offices in our region and found we did 48.4% of the contractor new applications, renewals and reinstatements, compared to 37.4% and 14.1! And they want to act like we don't do enough, because we don't answer as many phone calls? Seriously? When each of those contractor transactions can easily run 30 minutes to more than an hour--and even then they may not be completed, and therefore not be "counted" because they didn't result in a fiscal transaction--which is how we base the numbers. In comparison, a really long customer phone call usually won't last 10 minutes!

Ok, enough complaining. My friend was very happy to see the actual numbers I found for the first 3 months of the year. Oh, and our supervisor gave everyone Easter goodies and a cute toy--a paddle ball, with instructions not to hit each other or the customers with them. emoticon
One other very nice thing was that a customer (a would-be contractor that I spent over an hour with on Tuesday, but couldn't register due to old debts from a company run by a former partner he may not have been involved with at the time) returned and was able to get registered today. Someone else was working with him, and I asked if he had worked everything out. He said yes, and I told him I was very glad. (By the end, he had been pretty upset the other day, finally succumbing to profanity.) When he was finished he asked to speak to me--and he apologized for his behavior (which was certainly not the worst I've witnessed). I told him I understood his feelings, and very much appreciated his apology, and was just very happy it had worked out. The coworker I had my dust-up with the other day made a point to clue the supervisor in to the interaction today, and I got kudos for handling things well. So there are positive developments--which is good and very welcome.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/3/15 10:42 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Shadow, I really hate to see you go. Even if you are struggling with the health changes, I hope you decide to stay and chat with us. Friends can be a great source of support. We all struggle in this aspect. I have quit many times in the last few months on this journey. You just have to take it one day at a time and do what you feel you can do. Dont get discouraged at messing up or not doing enough. Just make one small change here and there, and then build up only as you feel ready. Maybe start with telling yourself to drink one glass of water a day if you dont get your recommended water, or eat a piece of fruit for a snack. That maybe the only healthy thing you do for the day, but its something good for your body and will make you more aware and in tune to small deliberate changes. Hope to still see you around friend, even if its just to post on the board. I messed up last night and ate a pack of poptarts before bed, that was after eating some edamame. We are all human! emoticon You just got to reset the next day and know that eventually it will stick... this is the insanity that you want to keep doing as it is for your health!

Eva, I hope Brenna enjoys her sleepover and you enjoy some alone time with your husband! Sounds nice that you are getting together with family for easter!

Amanda, I am glad you got to take the day off to destress and you feel much better. Sometimes just taking some "me" time to take care of ourselves makes all the difference.

I didnt do too much yesterday. I went to my grandfathers house yesterday and actually enjoyed talking with him for about an hour and a half. My mom gave him a keurig she said she had won in a raffle and he was tickled to show me how the machine worked. It was their newest model with a touch screen and he had bought little coffee filters for it and we made some decaf to drink. That is the first time in a long time I had enjoyed his company, if course there were no discussions of religion or Roys behavior, just catching up on day to day things. I came home and did alot of reading and actually couldnt go to sleep last night until about 1am, so I slept in until 9am instead of getting up so early.

Today, I am going to get my stationary bike out of layaway. I am excited to pick it up and get it assembled and have a mode of exercise to do while watching TV. It doesnt have a pedometer on it, so I need to find one I can use for bikes. I would really like to know my distance... I am all about the data. I could have bought the bike outright, but am trying to build my savings up and didnt want to use credit, this seemed like the best way to catch a good deal (on clearance from $349 to $99) and try the whole layaway thing. We are having a cookout at my grandfathers house tonight to celebrate my neices bday, I also wanted to do something for him too this evening since I forgot (facepalm) his bday. I truly feel bad for that one! So I got to get up and get some shopping done.

I hope you all have a nice weekend and see you all bright and early on Monday! I hope to see you back here Shadow!!!! emoticon emoticon


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/3/15 8:29 A

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hi girls...i am leaving sparks as i am not getting anywhere, except frustrated. there comes a point when you just are not ready and you keep doing it over and over ...well this quote will explain it all
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. - Albert Einstein
i thank you all for your support, but right now i just am not ready to make any changes. will remember this team, felt very close to all of you. good luck with everything, be back when my head is in the right place.

Edited by: SHADOW1012 at: 4/3/2015 (09:15)
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4/3/15 7:44 A

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Good Morning!

Athena I'm glad your aunt was accepting and realizes that gender identity isn't a "phase". That always irks me, calling something this serious a "phase" like the "terrible twos".

Sounds like you had a nice evening with Roy. Sometimes we just feel off and grumpy. At least he was honest about the problem yesterday.

Amanda I'm glad your clearing the air made you feel better and I hope you get positive responses from your supervisor.

Brenna is going to my mothers for a sleep over tonight and they are taking her to see Home. Jimmy and I are on our own. So we plan to go eat dinner then come home to a movie of our own. We colored and painted eggs yesterday. Fun :)

Athena I may look into your movie Veronika Decides to Die for a lazy day home alone. It sounds like something I would like, not so much. I also like documentaries. He'll watch one with Brenna but only because she insists.

So this morning I'll work on laundry and maybe scoot Brenna to the grocery store with me this morning, before the rain sets in. She won't mind as she likes to help. And she gets to pick out the snacks she wants for her back pack.

Saturday my parents (mom and step-dad) are bringing Brenna home from the sleepover and staying for an early dinner, then Sunday we go to Rhonda's house for potluck Easter dinner and an egg hunt. Here we hunt live eggs -- that I turn into part of the meal -- and at Rhonda's we do plastic ones. I love Easter as it gives me to opportunity to tell Ostara's story. I know the equinox was a bit ago but I wait until time for the Easter bunny as it's a borrowed tradition by Christians.

Anywho Have a good weekend ladies.



"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/3/15 12:12 A

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Exciting about the book and "revelations"--looking forward to hearing more.
emoticon
So glad the aunt was OK with the gender issues! And it is too bad that the relatives farther away are the cool ones!
emoticon
Thanks for the sympathy and support. emoticon Taking the day off de-stress and get all those anguished thoughts out of my head and into an objective outline of issues that need to be considered or addressed proved to be extremely helpful. I felt much better today, and able to face what turned into an intense day, with lots of contractors late in the day (they take the longest time for us to process).

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/2/15 10:01 A

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Finally got the motivation to move the treadmill this morning into Roy's room. Woke him up shoving a few hundred pound piece of exercise equipment through his bedroom door. LOL. All I need to do is the house cleansing and all I have wanted to get done with the house will be completed.


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/2/15 8:20 A

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Good Morning Ladies,

Have any of you read any books by Paulo Coehlo? He is a really good author, one of my favorites and his books are usually short reads, only 200-300 pages long. Anyways, they made his book, Veronika Decides to Die into a movie. I was going to rent it on Amazon but saw last night that Netflix has it. It is about a woman who tries to kill herself, but doenst succeed. She ends up in a mental hospital and is told, she only has a week to live. I wont spoil it for you in case you want to watch it. Sarah Michelle Gellar is the leading lady in the movie.

My keyboard on my laptop is acting up this morning, making it really hard to type as some of the keys arent working unless I press really hard. VERY FRUSTRATING.

I did hear back from my aunt last night, and she responded as I thought she would. She said she had no problem with gender identity and she knew it was real and because of hormones. She added Roy as a friend on FB. I think she does/did work in the medical field as a nurse or something. Roy did say it was sad that the family that lives hundreds of miles away from us is more accepting than the family that lives less than a mile from us.

I ran yesterday afternoon. 5.25 miles and then walked the rest until I got to 6 miles. The hamstring is much better, just a very slight twinge, and the hip felt fine too, however, once I got to 5.25 miles the outside knee of the leg I am/was having issues with started to ache just a bit. So I stopped and walked. I definitely think its ITB now. The hip was achy the rest of the afternoon and stiff but much better when I got up this morning. I think I am going to keep running for now, but keep mileage 3-4 miles. I find it so weird that all the hip stretches I do in yoga and I am still having this problem.

When I got back from my run, Roy and I got ready and went and saw Insurgent - GREAT MOVIE! Then ate dinner a E-Noodle. Its one of the spots we love to eat but they dont open until late in the evening so we seldom go. He was in a better mood. Yesterday, he said he wasnt feeling good and that was the cause of the mood. I think after laying around for a day and a half, he had gotten into lazy mode where its hard to get up and get moving. Today will just be a lazy day home with reading and journaling, maybe a short run this afternoon.

Im not sure about the QA timelines for the position posting and the interview. I have a feeling they will keep the post active until the end of next week and then interviews from there. I am wondering if they will be as complex as the interview process for the Problem Mgmt Position. Either way, I really hope to be prepared for this one and shine because this is the one I really want. I will keep you updated.

Amanda, I am sorry that you are having a difficult time at work and that its affecting your time at home and your rest. I hope that everything gets resolved and your communication is well received.

It sounds like you had another nice day with Brenna, Eva. I hope you enjoy your day in today. I am glad you are enjoying your book on the Sun Goddesses. It does sound interesting.

Have a great day!



Edited by: ATHENAFOREVER81 at: 4/2/2015 (08:22)

It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/2/15 8:06 A

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Good Morning Goddesses!

Athena I hope you and Roy make it to that movie. I'm sorry for the grumpy mood. Any idea what's bugging him? I think you did the right thing by letting Roy make the decision about your aunt. And it's a step "out of the shadows" that Roy said yes. That's a good thing I think. please let us know how she reacts. Hoping for positive here.

Good luck with the QA position! I'll keep you in my thoughts. Let us know interview times so we can give you an energy boost where we can!

Amanda I'm sorry about work. It's not fair to work at a job that's so emotionally draining. I hope your supervisor takes your email seriously.

Yesterday I took Brenna out for lunch, and then she asked to go shoe shopping. She bought a pair of sandals. She opted to walk to shopping center without being asked, and then we came home and played outside until time to come in and make dinner. Today we are in for thunderstorms so we will probably hang out in the house, sketch, watch a movie on Netflix, and play. It's been a good spring break. Too bad the weather didn't hold.

I'm enjoying my book on the sun goddesses and their myths. I'm making a few revelations as well. More on this after I ponder what it all means.

Have a good day goddesses!




"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/2/15 12:24 A

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I'll be keeping good thoughts for you, Athena, on the job front. How long will the process of posting and selecting take--any idea? I'm interested how the aunt responds, but glad you let Roy choose whether to say anything. Sorry Roy was in a poopy mood; hope things improve.

Glad you had a good time, Eva! We had quite a bit of rain today here in Washington. I took my umbrella (and used it) emoticon when I walked to the library (up a very steep hill--only my second time).

The whole work situation got to me, including the management fantasy that with our 2 new people hired, we should be all caught up and ready to take on more work beyond what we are already struggling with. I was crying when I went to bed, woke up at 2-something, started crying eve harder, finally got up, made some Tension Tamer tea, and began journaling. I calmed down enough to call in and explain I couldn't come in. I pledged to myself I would write as much as I could about what's bothering me, to express to the supervisor (and run by some of the crew for their input). I worked on it off and on throughout the day. I have 5 pages so far in outline form (Trebuchet 14, so not a tiny font). I am being very thorough, including listing the many tasks that need clear assignments, cross-training, instructions, and regular scheduling as well as tracking.

I have no idea what the supervisor's response will be; I sent it to her a while ago, as well as to myself. But it feels good to get it out there, objectively and in great specificity. It will be interesting to see where this leads, especially when I share it with some of my coworkers.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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4/1/15 10:10 A

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Eva, I havent ran in a week and a half, so I am unsure how the leg is. It feels great now, but once I hit the pavement, I will know for sure.


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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4/1/15 9:59 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Wow, I didnt think I would be on the computer this much during spring break. I am still getting up super early in the morning, so I have time to kill before Roy gets up and moving. He is on Teenager Standard Time (TST) LOL.

Amanda, I am sorry you had a bad day at work yesteday. I hope today is much better.

Eva, it sounds like you had a nice day yesterday getting outdoors, it was almost too warm here. Close to 80, but the breeze made it nice.

I received a post this morning on my FB from my Aunt on my fathers side of the family asking who Roy was. We arent super close and I havent seen them since I was a teenager and we didnt really talk too much until my father passed away. I asked Roy if he felt comfortable with me answering the question and he said yes. At first, I was wondering why and how she became so interested, but then I saw Roy had put a picture of my dad as his FB cover, and that must have got my aunt curious since a picture of her brother was on the FB of someone name Roy whom she didnt know. So I deleted the comment from my FB so my mom wouldnt see it and become curious. Roy has her blocked on FB, so she wouldnt be able to find him anyways, and then I private messaged my aunt. I dont know what her stance is on LGBT so I dont know how she will react, but for some reason, I feel they will be more open and accepting than my moms side of the family. I asked her not to share the information with my mom or grandparents since she is FB friends with my mom, and I guess I will let you know the response if she does respond.

Yesterday didnt go as planned. Roy was in a sour mood, and was grumpy while we were at the mall. I put on the happy face for as long as I could and finally, my energy was completely drained and the afternoon felt ruined, so I told him we should just go home. On the way home, he felt bad and wanted to do something, but I told him, my excitement of the outing was gone and I wasnt in the mood anymore. We came home and went our separate ways, I watched a show on TV then told him I was going to the store to pick up some fruits and veggies and he was welcome to come if he wanted. So we went out, then came back and I cooked dinner and we sat and watched a movie together. I asked him if he wanted to do anything today, and he said no. So I figure I will just go run and read and journal and enjoy the quiet time. I really wanted to see that movie, so if we go it will have to be tonight or tomorrow as friday and saturday evening already has engagements. I have a feeling after sitting in the house all day today, he will be ready to go out tomorrow.

The director emailed me that the QA position has posted. Its for a QA Associate III. I wasnt expecting that!!! I have my resume completely overhauled. I need to start reviewing and practicing interview questions. I am unsure how the process will go, if they will move another QA staff into the Associate III position and have me take their slot, or if they are hiring straight for an associate III. I am more nervous about it now than I was.

Have a great hump day!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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4/1/15 7:11 A

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Good Morning Goddesses!

Amanda I'm sorry you had such a bad day at work. Negative co-workers make a place very hard to tolerate. I hope your follow up goes well. Sometimes negative people just don't realize how negative they really are being.

Athena congrats on getting the cleaning done and good luck with your new challenge. How's the leg doing?

Shadow how was the Siege of Mess Mountain?

Yesterday I finished the family room and took Brenna to the park. She rode her bike while I walked. It's good exercise and if I pace her I'm at a small jog. It's suppose to rain here today. I may meet a friend for lunch with her kids. Still not concrete on the plans. It's raining so I doubt there'll be much outdoor activity.

I'm off to write a blog on my April goals. I need to start back with a monthly blog. I think it was good for me. Have a good day!



"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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4/1/15 12:00 A

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Had a frustrating day at work, constantly interrupted, never able to get to the overdue tasks buried on my desk, weighing on me. (I finally managed to squeeze in my afternoon break from 4:52 to 5:04). At the end of the day, while I was counting out tills with a coworker (I get off at 5:30), she started complaining *again* about one particular peer, and I lost it. I asked her to stop, said I didn't want to hear it. She harps constantly about this one person, and yet won't address the individual; I don't know if she expresses her concerns to the supervisor, but I'm tired of hearing the constant complaints and blaming. I was in no shape to express myself clearly or point out how counterproductive it is to blame individuals for organizational problems and issues of mismanagement--I just wanted her to stop dumping on me. She did, and I hope to follow up later, when I can speak without choking up from being so stressed out and tired of it all.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/31/15 9:00 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

I pulled up my trusty dinosaur of a laptop today and wanted to stop in and say hi. I just joined another 5% weightloss challenge again on SP that I would hope to spark my motivation again. I had to sign in and do the maditory posts as the challenge starts saturday.

I finished up project spring clean yesterday late morning. There are still a few tweaks that need to be done here and there but overall I am vey happy with the results. The house already feels much better energy wise, not as stagnant. I am going to go through today with a cleansing. Roy and I didnt do much else yesterday accept have a MTV marathon (I know, dont judge me, LOL). We watched 5 episodes of Catfish, then he went into his room to watch X-Files. He discovered it when they started discussing the new miniseries that would be coming out I watched the first episode of Teen Mom (original girls) and then climbed into bed around 8:30pm. I started that movie "Gods Not Dead" but fell asleep a little over half way through. What I did see was enough to piss me off. The portrayal of athiests and anyone not a christian was awful. Who ever wrote the movie definitely had a "christians are persecuted" mentality. Just bad all around... I had read the mixed reviews on Amazon and it caught my curiousity, but wow...

Today, Roy and I plan to go to the mall. He has been on an incense kick here lately. He wants to pick up some more and then we are going to see a movie. There is nothing good really out except Insurgent. I am actually looking forward to it since I have read the books. Yoga has been cancelled for spring break, so I plan to do some strength training and yoga at home tonight and get out tomorrow for some running. No yoga the following monday either, so my sister and I plan to meet up for a run.

Hope you all are enjoying your week! Write more later.


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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3/31/15 8:55 A

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hi girls...plan on starting my spring cleaning, a bit later than i would like, but better late than never. hubby is going out for the morning, so it gives me some time to get in his office. oh boy!!!!
blessed, glad you are enjoying the new bed....new is very nice.
athena...enjoy your time off
eva...being outside is great, glad that you can spend some outside time with your daughter.
off to start my day...want to conquer a mountain of mess.

"BE A FRUIT LOOP IN A WORLD FULL OF CHEERIOS"


"ONE STEP AT A TIME,ONE POUND AT A TIME AND THE REST WILL COME OFF IN TIME."


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3/31/15 8:19 A

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Good morning goddesses!

Amanda if your cortisol reduced when that old bed left it's very likely due to your big release. In the short term cortisol can make us old on to water weight. congrats!

We have a black box in the garage. :) yesterday was nice . Brenna and I spent most of the afternoon outside. We observed some fantastic bugs and managed to get a little housework done :)


"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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3/30/15 11:51 P

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I'm higher now, which feels a bit odd, but the mattress is really comfortable! I forgot to reset the alarm, and slept a couple hours past when I set it for! I usually have a leisurely time getting around in the morning, but not today! But I only got to work 12 minutes late. Given that I was busy with a contractor from 4 until 4:45, along with a Spanish interpreter on the Language Line, I never got my afternoon break, so actually have a work hour "credit" now, despite coming in late.

Went to TJ's after work, since I stuck close yesterday to rearrange bedroom and paths, and be available to take the scheduling call. My weight was down a little this morning. I wonder if it's partly because of the big release I did?

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/30/15 8:35 A

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Good Morning goddesses!

My you were busy over the weekend!

Shadow congrats on your restart. You can do this. I'm proud of you for recognizing patterns and deciding to give it a fresh go.

Amanda I hope you enjoy the new bed. Have you noticed an energy shift?

Athena enjoy your week off.

This is spring break week for us so we plan lots of outside stuff plus some indoor art projects. We're going to finish up that box we're making this week. Over the weekend I tried a new whipped buttercream recipe LOTS less sugar. as in like a 1/4th of the sugar. It takes longer but it was worth it. like eating whipped cream that is stable at room temperature.

So I did a run through on the birthday cake. have a final design in mind and now we get to spring clean and craft our way to the weekend. Brenna is excited.

Friday I did clean my room both bathrooms and the hallway so all that's left are Brenna's rooms and then family room, kitchen, and laundry room. Not sure what I'll tackle first.

Athena that spring cleaning and yard work always put more steps on you than you realize and for me there's a lot of climbing to reach high places. Works the thighs like mad.

Posting the April activity this morning so i don't forget. Have a good day goddesses!


"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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3/29/15 11:33 P

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emoticon Shadow, emoticon Or should I say emoticon , as I am determined to consciously shed what's weighing me down: my clutter and old habits. Starting with banishing the negative energy that was likely attached to that furniture from my childhood home and dysfunctional family of origin.

I did it! I bought the bed & mattress, paid for same day delivery, and dropped by Target on the way home to buy a set of queen sheets. Turns out they sell fitted and flat separately (I think my old full flats will work), so I was going to get just one fitted queen for now, but found jersey (really soft, T-shirt like material) sets on sale, so got one in a nice neutral that will go will other linens I have.

Broke down my old bed--got the mattress and box spring off, and dismantled the metal frame, took it out in 2 pieces to the dumpster. The 2 big pieces were too heavy for me to handle alone, so I propped them up against the wall in the bedroom with the hope that for $20, they might carry them out to the dumpster area. Then I vacuumed like mad, picking up the items (mostly cat toys and balls, but a couple earrings, a pen, plus paper scraps) that had made their way under the bed and stayed.

Had to wait for their call to give my a delivery and installation window. Turns out I was their first stop from the warehouse (they leave there at 5, from a nearby town). That gave me time to henna my hair and shower, then clear some paths for them to move the pieces along. They got in just before 5:30, managed to get everything in along those clutter-free paths, and assembled the pieces. And they did agree to haul the old mattress and box spring to the dumpster, even though that wasn't "included." Turns out the new bed's quite a bit longer than my old one, making it a somewhat tight fit. The guys checked on their first placement, and I requested it be pulled over somewhat for easier access on the back side when making the bed. They took care of it, I looked everything over, signed off their papers, gave them their cash tip, and they were gone in less than an hour. I got the bed made, then finished making dinner, and have just been relaxing since.

I didn't get around to regular chores, so will need to deal with things throughout the week. Can't wait for my first night in the new bed!
emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/29/15 8:22 A

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thanks blessed...words i needed to hear. enjoy your new mattress...the energy in the room will be so different, with the cleaning and the new mattress, i am sure your sleeping will be such a different experience.
athena...your inspiring me to get in there and start cleaning the house, to go through things and start getting rid of what i dont need.
today restarts my program of health... emoticon and that also includes getting rid of what i dont want....will be an interesting time.
off to start the day. have a wonderful sunday all.


"BE A FRUIT LOOP IN A WORLD FULL OF CHEERIOS"


"ONE STEP AT A TIME,ONE POUND AT A TIME AND THE REST WILL COME OFF IN TIME."


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3/29/15 12:39 A

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emoticon progress, Athena, truly inspiring! ( emoticon w/ Shadow on that!)

emoticon for choosing to restart, Shadow. It can be hard to witness yourself repeating the same patterns and struggles over and over. I was like that with drinking for a long time, until I got that the momentary pleasure I experienced was not worth what I lost; it was when I realized that alcohol severed my connection to the Goddess that the choice to give it up became a pretty easy one. I usually recommend moderation rather than "deprivation" except where we know abstaining is the best and most nurturing choice. It really has to come back to what will make me feel my best inside and out--physically, emotionally, spiritually--not just now, but in the long run? At least that's how I see it.

Well, I checked a bunch more places today, then went back to the 2 stores I visited last evening. I really liked the salesman at the first store, but I would have to wait weeks. At the second store, I could get a similar bed for a couple hundred less, not quite as pleasing a design as the one I'd have to wait 4 weeks for, and a really good mattress with heat dispersing gel along with the pillow top and good coil construction and firm sides at a very good price. And as of today it was in stock and he offered delivery this afternoon. I had to think on it before committing to spending $1000 on frame, mattress and delivery & installation, but plan to go in tomorrow morning and make arrangements. I'll have time to dismantle the old bed and vacuum like mad before they bring the new one.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/28/15 5:17 P

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Happy Saturday ladies!

I am talk to texting from my iPad so hopefully this will come out clearly enough to understand. Spring cleaning part two commenced today, I continued in the kitchen and have that about 75% done now and worked on the laundry room and got that done. I also worked in my bedroom againand ended up with another two boxes of clothes to take to CVANS. There were a lot of things I was keeping thinking I would get back in to once I lost weight. Everything is so outdated though I probably wouldn't wear half of that so I did them a farewell. Got the bathroom closet in better shape. There still some beauty product that I need to go through and throw out but I'm stopping for the day, Going to paint my nails and watch Thursday's episode of grays anatomy. Per my fit bit, I walked 12,000 steps Just cleaning. I didn't expect that.

I hope you are enjoying your weekend. I will chisel away again tomorrow with my project and hopefully by Monday I'll be done and can enjoy the rest of my spring break. Take care!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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3/28/15 8:08 A

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hi girls...have been off my game lately.
eva, i was bullied in high school, so bad that i almost dropped out. finally said enough is enough, told my parents to do something or i was not going back. also told my guidance counselor and slowly things got better...at least the bullies stopped.
athena...enjoy your time off. so nice to have a break to rest and get away from the everyday things. you are inspiring me to start heavy cleaning in my place!
blessed, never thought about mattresses...that is a good one. i know that used clothing can hold the vibration of the person who wore it before and it is hard to remove it...but i never thought of a mattress. hope they have it in stock for you.
i am letting today slide and then restarting my lifestyle change again. today i am going to plan out what i can eat for the week, and the calories involved. this is such an ongoing battle for me...and it doesnt have to be that way. why do i bang my head up against the wall all the time? well, at least i am restarting, so that is good.
off to start my day. have a great weekend everyone.

"BE A FRUIT LOOP IN A WORLD FULL OF CHEERIOS"


"ONE STEP AT A TIME,ONE POUND AT A TIME AND THE REST WILL COME OFF IN TIME."


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3/28/15 12:24 A

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I did something very different after work tonight--I went looking at beds. The themes in Clutter Busting about finding energy drains in your home got me thinking. No, I don't keep old letters or mementos from old relationships--but out of cheapness, I've been using my mom's old bed--which may carry a lot of loneliness and sorrow, as well as possibly having been the site of one or more instances of my abuse if she was still using what had belonged to her and my father. It's something I had never considered. The energy doesn't feel dark to me, but I have to wonder how it will feel when it's gone, and I have something new and much nicer instead. I'll be spending quite a lot--on the frame (I'm thinking pedestal with 2 built-in drawers at the foot for bed linens--no clutter!) & mattress, delivery and possibly hauling out the old one. But I'm excited, and I want it to be in stock, so I don't have to wait weeks!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/27/15 8:48 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Thanks for the info on the message, Eva! I will definitely check into it. Your stories about bullies reminded me of an incident that happend to me in first grade. There was this boy who was a year older than me who walked up to me on the playground and punched me in the nose so hard that made my nose bleed and for no reason at all. I even remember his name... Jason Hyde. I remember being really scared of him after than incident and trying to always be aware of where he was when we went out on the playground. Fortunately, we moved to Colorado the following year and I never saw him again. But it always stuck with me...

Amanda, I am glad that you got your grocery shopping done!

Well, after today, I will officially be off for the week. I have really been looking forward to this. I didnt get much more cleaning done in the house during the week. The hard push at work has left me mentally drained during the evenings. I even skipped yoga last night, climbed into bed and was passed out by 9pm. Roy has to stay over at school again today to finish up making and painting the set for the drama club play. He also has me taking him to school at 7:30 am on Saturday Morning to finish... ugh. So grateful for a week of getting to sleep in because I havent been able to the last few weekends.

I will try to pop on here some during the next week, but I am usually not on the computer unless I am at work. So I may disappear for a bit. I hope you all are doing well.

Enjoy spring break with Brenna, Eva! Talk to you ladies soon!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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3/27/15 6:58 A

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Good Morning!

Congrats Athena! I'm glad you got some recognition for your hard work. I hope when you apply for the next position it add weight to their decision.

Don't know if you can manage it but a massage would be better for that hammy than anything then, aside from rest of course. If you are interested contact one of the schools. They are always looking for guinea pigs to practice on. Here a student can't charge for a massage. So you might get lucky and find a freebie.

Amanda glad you got your groceries :) And I'm proud of how you dealt with the situation. You kept your head.

I wasn't bullied at school. They tried but it didn't take so the girls moved on. But I won't let Bug be bullied. I've seen what it does to kids. Our school system does a good job of keeping an eye on it and actually doing something about it. Anna (niece the same age as Brenna) has a kid in her class that has fallen under "bully laws" so much that he's been suspended 3 times this year and had countless after school detentions. He's also a thief, he's been caught stealing snacks and ice cream money out of back packs. This one has lead to the teacher putting him in "isolation" basically he's so close to her if he sneezes she can hand him a tissue. The principle said if this continues into next year he'll be recommend for alternative school. Apparently 2nd grade is the first opportunity they have to make that recommendation. And yes the kid is violent. One of the suspensions was due to busting a little girl's head open on the play ground. The girl had to have stitches.

But that's not the kid that was isolated. The kid that was isolated was apparently trying to take another kids cookies from his lunch box. His twin (and opposite) said his brother does that stuff all the time and that's why he's not allowed to go to parties. I'm thinking that means mom grounds him when he gets in trouble at school....

Anyway. I'm glad we have a good school staff. They are alert. We've grown so fast in this area that I'm surprised the staff has been on top of things like they have been.

I hope you all have a good weekend. We are in for cold and sunny but I'm hopeful for next week. Spring Break! I have my Bug all week. Wonder what we'll get into?


"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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3/27/15 12:13 A

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Well, I remembered to take my purse with me after work, and I returned to Trader Joe's and got a few groceries, including a quarter ham. I can chop it up and add to salads or soups--yum!
emoticon
Hoping you gals get feeling better. I'm lucky, I never got bullied. I'm glad the monitors were monitoring well and took care of the problem! And kudos for dumping your leaves where they will do good, Eva!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/26/15 11:41 A

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Good Morning Ladies!!

Is if friday yet??? LOL.

Work has been crazy trying to catch up on everything and be in a good place with timelines before taking next week off. I had two meetings yesterday that ran the course of 3 hours so it really took away from getting actual work done. I have another 1.5 hour meeting today.

I had a nice surprise though at yesterdays QRA Meeting. I received the Red Ribbon Award for my work on one of the projects I have been on. It was nice to get that recognition as the meeting was for all Problem Management and QA staff across the Nation. It will be nice to add that to my Linkdin account and resume. (I will try to post a blog/pic of the award).

Eva, I had originally thought possible IT Band issue since I struggled with that for the longest time. It was one of the reasons I upped my strength training and started yoga. However, I usually feel that pain in the knee instead of the hip. I havent ran at all this week because Roy has been extremely busy with school projects and has had me run him all over the place late in the afternoons, but hope to start back this weekend or while on spring break. I started doing quite a bit of lunges last month and noticed my hamstring was feeling kind of strained on that side. It makes me wonder if my hip is overcompensating for the strained hamstring. I noticed it when I ran with my sister on Monday that the hammy was feeling pulled while running. Maybe taking this week off will help some more.

I am glad the lunch room monitors took care of the bully. I was terribly bullied as a kid and Roy went through it some in elementary school. I dont tolerate that at ALL. Of course, going to the Boys and Girls Club couselor and calling the teacher to take care of the issues embarrassed Roy, but I couldnt stand him coming home after school crying everyday because of it. I am happy he is at the school he is at right now, and most of the kids are accepting. It makes me so happy that he has a strong group of friends and a nice social life. I never want him to go through what I had to growing up.

Amanda, that sucks about leaving your purse and work, but glad you were able to handle the situation without getting terribly upset!

Have a great Thursday!

Edited by: ATHENAFOREVER81 at: 3/26/2015 (11:45)

It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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3/26/15 6:48 A

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Good Morning!

Amanda usually if you misplace your ID give them you SS number or you DL number they will run it and see if the license is valid. explaining where it is helps too.

Well I watch the lunchroom monitors in action yesterday. There was a kid being a bully in the lunch room and I'll have to say they reacted quickly and removed the bully from the group. The kid wasn't in Brenna's class but his twin is. The twin is a good kid. He's silly but a good kid.

I hope you all are doing well. I'm sore from walking up and down my hill to dump my leaves from the raking. I don't burn leaves, I dump them in the edge of the woods to compost and feed the trees. (yes I know strange but it's good for the trees) in 2 days I've raked for 5 hours and i'm still not done. rain is moving in so the rest will just have to wait...




"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



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3/26/15 12:09 A

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Boy, do I feel silly! I took my shopping list to work, had the grocery bags in the car, drove in the rain to the next town with my Trader Joe's, but before I exited the car, I realized I didn't have my purse! It was still locked up in my overhead cabinet at work.
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So I drove *very carefully* home, and will have to pick up the intended items tomorrow after work.
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At least I stayed very calm about it, as getting mad or frustrated would not have changed a thing. So I guess there was a little success hidden in there.
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Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/25/15 6:50 A

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Good Morning!

Athena I hope that hip heals. It's not your IT Band is it? I hope Roy is feeling better today. I hate when kids are sick.

Amanda sounds like you have found a friend in that book. I look forward to hearing your progress!

Carl perkins holds local drives to get clothes for abused women to go out job seeking, they have shelters for abused women and children, and like I said emotional support for both. It's a cause near to my heart. The women who run the shelters/drives have stood in the shoes of the women they are helping so they understand.

Well no box painting yesterday. I spent 4 hours cleaning the flower beds and raking leaves that I never got to this fall over the shoulder injury. I love my husband but this fall he acted like the rake had typhoid....

Today is lunch with Brenna and some errands afterward. If the weather holds I may get in some more raking after homework. Brenna is loving this play time she's getting post homework :) I think she's been out there until 6 pm the last 2 nights and is hoping for a 3rd. :)





"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



~~~~~Co-leader of~~~~~
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3/24/15 11:28 P

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I Googled Carl Perkins Center, and that is a Tennessee organization. The really close Thrift It store is just one lady's business (her tiny website talks about "retail therapy"). So I'll stick with Value Village. I checked their website, and I like their slogan of Good Deeds. Good Deals, plus they have a cool page on the Thrift Cycle, see link: www.valuevillage.com/thrift-store-cy
cl
e.aspx

I met with Katie, and shared how excited I was with the Clutter Busting book, which I brought & she plans to recommend to some clients, and my little dresser drawer victory. Also how I'm just feeling more hopeful, as well as on the verge of something very exciting. And I recognized for the first time how I was led to that book. I wanted to challenge my fear of wandering around Seattle, and to check out metaphysical stores to find products and people to relate to, and in this wonderful store crowded with New Age and spiritual merchandise--I first see this bright red book with a trash can on the cover, called Clutter Busting: Letting Go of What's Holding You Back. It really feels like this is the time for me to let go of a lot of old junk on the outside and the inside, both, and make room for something new & amazing, as well as what really matters.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/24/15 9:08 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

I dont have too much time to write today. Roy woke up not feeling well and insisted on going to school. He was moving so slow that it put me behind and I was late to work this morning. Got bombarded with a bunch of emails, so I got to get the day going to finish up in time to pick Roy up after school today.

I definitely understand baby steps with the spring cleaning. I didnt leave a mess in the kitchen and made sure the part I did take care of was cleaned up before stopping for the day. I plan to continue in the kitchen today. I started working in my closet a little bit too with clothes and shoes. I also found a bag of crafts in the bottom of my closet. Wax for candle making with frangrances, yarn with knitting and crochet needles. I put those in a rubbermaid box I am going to designate for crafting only. I went and ran before yoga last night with my sister, we only had time for one mile. My hip was a little achy this morning and I am sure todays longer run will have it sore again. I will continue to stretch though as I am not ready to give up the running again. I am finally back to the pace I was at 3 years ago, and I just dont want to lose it at this time. As it heats up outside though, I will probably cut back on the running and opt for more cross training.

Good Luck on the box for Brennas photo booth. I am sure it will come out nicely. I am sorry to hear about your husband Shadow and I hope he mends quickly. I am the same way he is about refusing to go to the doctor.

Hope you all have a nice Tuesday!

Edited by: ATHENAFOREVER81 at: 3/24/2015 (09:11)

It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

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3/24/15 7:02 A

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Good Morning Goddesses!

Athena I schedule blocks of time for certain days when I do my spring and fall clean up. I usually do my kitchen last, but what ever works for the individual. That way it's not overwhelming. the kitchen itself is done in 2 blocks.

Think of the releasing the stuff as dumping old emotions and habits while you clean the place up. With each thing you remove you remove a bad habit or memory that you dwell on. it helps me sometimes make it through a project if I treat it like a therapy session.

Amanda here's the link to the civic center. I'm not sure how far outside of west tn they reach but all the info is here. www.carlperkinscenter.org/cp/

Shadow I hope your husband is doing okay. It's scary to take a fall. I'll keep him in my thoughts.

I hope you like the book. I bought a kindle edition. It's looking to be an interesting read for the information, but I haven't gotten very far into the text.

Well today I'll be working on my box/photo booth again and maybe doing some raking before the rain sets in tomorrow. A friend of mine is a photographer and she's making a Tardis from Dr. Who to use as a senior pictures prop! It's cool to see it come to life.





"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



~~~~~Co-leader of~~~~~
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3/24/15 5:35 A

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hi girls...it has been on hellava week. my hubby hurt his hip and we thought he broke it. last week was really bad with pain, he yelled every time he moved. since he will not go for a xray, we decided that it would be pointless to go to the doctor, so with alternative meds and homeopathy he has managed to start healing....he now may wince but seems to be healing. all my energy was being focused on him...not moving or lifting anything.
today we plan on shopping so that i can get back to eating decent meals.
i was thinking of retiring from massage, just as i had my mind made up...i got a phone call from an amish man looking for an aromatherapy massage. he scheduled an appointment, will see if he shows up. hope he doesnt come in a buggy...neighbors would be wondering what is going on.
athena, you are kinda like me when it comes down to getting deep in projects, and i always get overwhelmed by them. this year i am trying to break down things so that they are more manageable. my first priority will be my main bathroom. that is my hubby's room, i use the bathroom on the first floor. want to scrub that down really well. plan on doing that today.
eva, the book Bringing Down the Sun sounded so interesting to me that i bought a copy, should get it on wednesday....love amazon prime!
blessed, taxes are a pain in the neck....and it is so lovely to get lost deep in a book.
well, off to start my day. have a terrific tuesday all.


"BE A FRUIT LOOP IN A WORLD FULL OF CHEERIOS"


"ONE STEP AT A TIME,ONE POUND AT A TIME AND THE REST WILL COME OFF IN TIME."


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3/24/15 12:28 A

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Eva I've never heard of that group, but they sound emoticon Do you know if they are just local to you? That's exactly the kind of group I'd like to support.

I totally get the running out of steam part-way through a project like that, Athena. It's one reason I'm so big on babysteps--I don't get myself as overwhelmed, where I shut down and leave myself in a bigger mess.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/23/15 9:05 A

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Good Morning Ladies!

Congrats on getting your taxes done, Amanda. I know it was nice to get that out of the way!

Eva, I will definitely look into the DVD, thanks!

I havent ran since wednesday, and the hip pain is gone now. I am concerned that it will come back once I run again today and tomorrow, but we will see. I am supposed to run with my sister today and since she is just starting back it will be a slow/short run. Tuesday, will probably be more of a workout as I will do anywhere from 4-6 miles. Yoga also tonight!

Well, I had a productive/unproductive weekend! Saturday, I got up early and picked up Roy from his school lock in at 8am, then dropped him off and got my car into the shop and fixed. Once I got home, the spring cleaning project commenced. I decided to start in the kitchen because it was going to be the biggest chore since it is the largest room in the house. I decided to start with cleaning out cabinets and wiping then out and down. I didnt realize how much of a pack rat I was until I started looking at stuff I hadnt used in years, but was still hesitant to part with. (suvineer (sp?) cups from trips to the beach, 20 water bottles, a set of dishes I never used, pots and pans). I ended up shutting down the nagging voice in my head that told me I needed to hang onto these things and quickly dumped them in the donation box. I ended up taking two large boxes and a set of dishes (I had 2 sets, one gifted from my mom - oscar de la renta - that if she ever wants back she wont get because that was the set I chose to keep, my family has a habit of giving something to me and then deciding to change their mind later and wanting it back). The whole project will definitely take me longer than I expected as I was being extremely thorough with my cleaning. I only got half way through the kitchen before getting burned out and stopped for the day and took the boxes to CVANs. I also unloaded a couple of pairs of shoes, and about 20 DVDs into the boxes before taking them over. Tonight when I get home, I may try to tackle my closet to clean out some clothes and shoes. Kitchen wont be tackled again until Tuesday.

I am ready for this week to be over with. I will be on vacation next week with Roy enjoying spring break. I definitely dont want to be cleaning the whole week I am off, so I want to get it done early! We dont have any plans to do anything. I had thought about going to the beach for a few days and saw an awesome deal on a hotel room using my verizon rewards, but am in a good place financially right now and thought I better hang on to my money and build back up my savings instead. I will look into going to the beach this summer instead.

Hope you all have a great Monday!


It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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3/23/15 7:07 A

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Good Morning Goddesses!

Athena I'm glad the yoga helped. If you don't want to find a chiropractor then you might try a yoga DVD at home. For my back I prefer Crunch Candlelight yoga. You can find it on Amazon. There are others but look for one that focuses on relaxation. It's meant to coax out the kinks.

Amanda I'm glad you got your taxes done! and a belated bless Ostara to you.

I bought myself a book yesterday called Bringing Down the Sun from Stephanie Woodfield. It focuses on Sun goddesses. Which is a unique aspect I've been interested in for some time.

I hope you all had a blessed weekend. We attended 2 birthday parties and went to a fund raiser for the school.

On Donation, I usually go to the Carl Perkin's Civic Center drops. They work with abused women but also with children going through sexual abuse recovery. They provide therapist for the kids, and court room/examination buddies for the kids (a monogramed teddy bear). and if the kid wants a non-legal representative to support them in the court room during hearings.




"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." Hecato, Greek philosopher



~~~~~Co-leader of~~~~~
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3/22/15 12:09 A

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It took longer than it might have to do my taxes online, as I picked the free option with the coolest name, Tax Slayer (being a big Buffy fan); then at the end, it turns out my modest interest income pushed my income just over their limit to file for free. So I had to go back and start over on a different site, setting up an account and entering everything in in a different format.

But it's done, and I'll be getting some nice money back. Next year should be much easier, and I plan to do it much sooner! I discovered one of my favorite authors has a brand new book out: Dead Heat by Patricia Briggs. This is in her Alpha and Omega werewolf series. I went to Barnes & Nobles, renewed my membership, bought the book and started reading. I'm taking breaks now and then to do something (like Sparking or making a salad for dinner), but will probably mostly be reading for the rest of the weekend! What fun!!

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/20/15 11:56 P

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Yes, wishing all our goddesses an awesome Ostara! (Or a special spring equinox. emoticon )

Great news on Rhonda, Eva, & thanks for the reminder about who Essie is! Can't wait for your pix--I admire you for being so creative.

I'm really sorry you have such a long commute, Athena. Hope your hip gets feeling better. I've seen a new thrift store close to my place, and also wondered where the money went. The don't mention a charity obviously, but refer to themselves as a "neighborhood thrift store." I go further away to donate to Value Village since I know they help the community. But I'll try to learn more about this other place; if they also help victims of domestic violence, I will so load them up!

I finally spent some time on wellness activities which were long overdue, and it felt so good to be doing something really positive that I love doing to encourage my coworkers to lead healthier, more active and balanced lives! emoticon The new supe and I still need to work on our relationship (at least as I see it), but I'm working hard to stay more in a place of choice about what I focus on, regardless of conditions and choices being made around me.

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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3/20/15 8:47 A

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Happy Ostara Ladies!

I am glad spring is here, its my second favorite season, only after fall. The only thing I hate though is it tends to warm up too fast in the Carolina's. As of right now, we are cold and in the 40s, we are supposed to warm up to the 70s this weekend though.

Thanks for the suggestion about the chiropractor, Eva. I used to go often back in 2012 for trigger point therapy to loosen up some really bad PF I was having. I also got frequent adjustments. My chiropractor used to be one mile from my office so I could swing by on my lunch breaks, but he relocated his office to about 10 miles away and its not convenient to get to him anymore because hes neither near my office or home. I need to find a new one. I also need to find out how much a visit will cost with this new insurance plan I am on. I think I have to pay 30% of the visit up front, but wil need to check. I have had so many expenses come out lately that I need a financial break! I am taking my car into the shop for the second time in the last couple of months and after this repair, I would have spent $500 in repairs, on top of Hovies $250 pet bill for shots and tests, and Roys new glasses which I paid $100 out of pocket after using my HSA Card. My poor savings account has taken a hit and I dont want it to drop any lower than it already is. I did do yoga last night after being pretty stiff in that hip area and it felt so much better after class. Woke up a little tight this morning, and getting out of the car this morning wasnt as painful as the last couple of days. I probably wont do any running today, I may go for a walk. I may try to run on Saturday when I get back from the repair shop.

I asked for a bunch of boxes from the janitor here at work and took them home yesterday. This weekend I am going to start the spring cleaning project of all spring cleaning projects. I am going to completely get rid of so much stuff that sits around in my home and takes up space but never gets used. There is a thrift store I have been donating too over the last year. I honestly thought they were just a "for profit" thrift store, but when I looked up their website to get their phone number to call and see what types of items I can donate (other than clothes), I actually found out the profts go to helping battered women and their children. This made me so excited to help such a good cause! So I am going to get rid of a bunch of clothes, shoes, dishes, books, dvds, trinkets, and donate it to them. I love the fact that the thift store is less than a mile from my home too.

I am taking a week off for Roys spring break starting on March 30th. Looking forward to that!

Hope you all have a nice weekend!

Edited by: ATHENAFOREVER81 at: 3/20/2015 (08:50)

It's hard to beat a person who never gives up!

Keely in North Carolina, EST.

The FIRECRACKERS Team
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