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TINAADVANI's Photo TINAADVANI SparkPoints: (4,398)
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5/17/11 4:52 P

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I have a 15 year old daughter that I would love to be able to get to exercise or at least be active. She also could stand to tone up. She eats almost everything that we eat. She has always been very good about trying everything that we fix. One of the problems is that she is only with my husband and I every other week. when she is not with us, she is at her dad's. We make it a habit to cook healthy meals since we (my husband and I) are trying to lose weight and get in better shape. I have tried to get my daughter to work out with me when I get home from work. She won't. She thinks she gets enough activity taking her dog (at her dad's) for walks after school. She has terrible menstrual cramps. We have put her on the pill to help remedy that in addition to getting prescription pain relief for her. when I took her to the doctor, she was told that being active, eating healthfully, and drinking lots of water will also help the cramping. After we went to the doctor, I even found an article in her Seventeen magazine that said the same thing. I keep reminding her of this fact but she only thinks about it during "that time of the month" which only happens every 3 months now that she is on the pill.

Sometimes I think about how I ate and what my activity level was like when I was her age. That is when I try to talk to her more about it. I really don't want her to have the same weight issues I have now.

I understand your issues with your teenager and wish I had a guaranteed fix for it for my own daughter's sake.

Tina Advani

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TRISHAJO17 SparkPoints: (0)
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5/12/11 10:04 P

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I have a 13 yr old son that I get worried about too. He sounds alot like your daughter. He is overweight & I try to get him to eat better but I don't want him to get down on himself. He played football for 6 years & just gave it up. I don't understand why... Now I get worried about him getting the right exercise. I get so frustrated with him but I don't want him to know. I have been trying to get him to walk with me everynight but he won't have that either. I guess it's not cool for a boy to be walking with his mom. LOL! Thanks for listening!!!

MOMTO3CUTEBOYS's Photo MOMTO3CUTEBOYS Posts: 603
5/11/11 11:53 P

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My oldest is 16 and I added him onto our gym membership. He goes to the gym with me and we workout together. He's the oldest of three (he has two brothers 7 and 2) He loves it (although he probably wouldn't admit that to friends...lol) because it's something him and I can do and his brothers can't go with us. We don't get a lot of one on one time and I found this gives me some time with just him at least four or five times a week.

The three very best things I've ever done in my life are Ty William, Bryce Julius, and Preston Scott.

R: Refuse to Quit
O: Overcome Obstacles
A: Account for my Actions
R: Reach all my Goals

The question should be, is it worth trying to do, not can it be done. - Allard Lowenstein

Nothing is IMPOSSIBLE, the word itself says "I'M POSSIBLE"!!! ~Audrey Hepburn

The toughest lift of all, is YOUR ass off the couch.


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STLRFNS's Photo STLRFNS SparkPoints: (13,632)
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5/10/11 8:46 A

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I think with teens and preteens - you just have to keep trying. They definitely try your patience more than little ones do. Hang in there - she will come around!

Sheri, St Louis, MO

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YBRIGGS625's Photo YBRIGGS625 SparkPoints: (1,785)
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5/10/11 12:02 A

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Thanks everyone.
She is extremely stubborn. Luckily her father got her eating broccoli when she was a toddler which led her to eating other veggies. We haven't drank soda on a regular basis in years so no worries there; she knows it is a treat. We live in Brooklyn and don't have a yard so yard work is out of the question but there are plenty of other chores she can do. It is just getting her to do them may actually take some punishment from me first, like taking away that cell phone she loves to chat and text on. I have been trying to get her to go to the deli around the corner from us (a 1 minute walk) by herself to get bread or milk or even that pack of gum but to no avail. Part of the problem will be my boyfriend who lives with us. He is junk food addict and I have tried till I'm blue in the face to get him to not buy so much junk food but all I get from him is I like what I like and I'm not changing the food I eat. She loves to drink milk and will eat yogurt too. I was reading an article today about kids lunches and plan on packing tangerine sections in her lunch tomorrow. She gets school lunch three times a week, we have to preselect the lunch a month in advance; it is the same every month but I always go over the menu with her. They actually serve pretty good food, they get it catered in from local restaurants. It's not that she eats horrible junk food, it is just needs to eat more balanced meals. Plus, she needs to exercise more. It is such a hard age. My son who is 17 and has aspergers syndrome was easier at this age than she is. The mood swings are amazing. Last week I put my foot down at dinner to get her to bring the silverware to the table for dinner and she refused even though it was food she likes. My boyfriend finally got the silverware except for her as she had said she could eat with her hands so we took her literally. She ended up saying how much she hated my boyfriend yet earlier she was hanging all over him, sitting on his lap and telling him about video games. She really does look to him as a father (her father died two years ago). She never ate her dinner. I get a little worried I guess with food cause if she gets low blood sugar she get a migraine and she knows I get worried about this. I'll just provide her with better food, if she doesn't want to get a headache then she'll have to eat it. I'll talk to my boyfriend about the junk food, he has before put cookies etc above the fridge where she cannot reach. As for the chores, that will be a challenge.

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OLGAINTX's Photo OLGAINTX Posts: 3,473
5/9/11 10:57 A

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My DD was always a picky eater ever since she started eating solid food as a baby. I would complain to her doctor about it. He said to just offer her food that she needs to eat and make sure to eat that food yourself and show a good example. He said not force the food on her, just let he food sit there and she will eventually try it. He was right. It took years in some cases, but she eats almost everything now.

Olga
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It maybe too late to go back and make a new start, but it's not too late to make a new ending.

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I eat to live. I don't live to eat.
CMFARRA's Photo CMFARRA Posts: 602
5/9/11 10:31 A

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This is so hard! When I was 12 all we did was play outside! Now, either because of schedules or fear of freaks we can't just let our kids roam the neighborhoods like we did!
I have 3 boys, all of whom are involved with judo and the older two with wrestling. The oldest is on the US Judo team for the visually impaired and was just in Florida defending his national title. He and the middle one (they are 18 and 15, the youngest is 11) go down the basement and lift weights. Although they spend their fair share of time playing video games they all have to take turns mowing the lawn (the visually impaired one sometimes gets out of this!) hang laundry outside, and walk the dogs (which the 11 year old gets out of because the dogs weigh more than him!). If I'm doing major yard work they are out there helping me. We also have a pool in the backyard, which helps in the summer.
I would start requiring you daughter to do household chores, as a requirement of living in the house. The more physically active the chore, the better. If there's yard work to do, a dog to walk, laundry to haul up and down the steps, or handwashing dishes, get her involved. It may not be much but it'll be a start and you know she won't just be rotting her brain sitting in her room! If she's willing to walk or ride her bike with you to the store to get that pack of gum, go for it! If she says she'll ride for a bag of potato chips, that would be a different story! If there's a neighbor who needs their dog walked, either because their elderly or they work during the day, see if they'd like her help. For so many of our kids the school phys ed program is the only time they get exercise. It's a shame. I loved the days when I'd eat breakfast and then my mom wouldn't see me until dinner and not worry about it!
Good luck!

www.amway.com/mcfarra


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STLRFNS's Photo STLRFNS SparkPoints: (13,632)
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5/8/11 11:34 P

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I have two daughters - soon to be 14 (Mikayla/Kayla) and 15 (Anastasia/Staci). Staci is a picky picky eater - she doesn't like many fruits or veggies. She gets it from her Dad who is the same way. Kayla on the other hand loves almost everything. Staci is also a chocoholic. Staci is 5'8" and about 180 lbs which is about 30 lbs over what she should be for her height. Kayla is 5'4" and 114 lbs so she is right on.

I have done a few things with them and I'm not sure what you are facing with your daughter but these things have worked for me. I got rid of soda and almost all unhealthy snacks from the house. I buy things in individual portions instead of boxes. I buy bottled water because they like it. After I joined a gym, they wanted to join too so I signed them up. They don't go as many days a week as I do but they do go. I buy Staci whatever fruits and veggies she will eat. The choices have to be theirs but what I've noticed over the past couple of months is that they have slowly started moving towards better choices. There is also a Sparkteen website and they both signed up. They don't track religiously like I do but it's another way to make someone aware.

Part of it does rely on them but I gave them the tools. And sometimes I just pull the Mom card. They may not want to do it but it's too bad - they are going to do it. I don't use it often because you don't want them to resent it but sometimes when they are sitting around too much - it must be done. Hope it helps!

By the way - both of them are blue belts in Tae Kwon Do!

Sheri, St Louis, MO

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ECONLADY's Photo ECONLADY Posts: 5,417
5/8/11 4:49 P

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Your daughter eats better than my 15 year old when it comes to veggies. First, bribing doesn't work and only causes other problems. I would put it back in her hands. Give her healthy food and if she refuses to eat let it go. It has to be her idea.

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YBRIGGS625's Photo YBRIGGS625 SparkPoints: (1,785)
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5/8/11 4:27 P

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I have come into realization since joining Spark that my daughter needs to eat better. She has always eaten veggies like broccoli and asparagus but doesn't like fruit too much. I can get her to eat unsweetened applesauce but not an apple and she will eat clementines and tangerines but these are only in season such a short time a year. She is a chocoholic and would eat chocolate all day every day if I let her which I don't. I usually wind up having to make a 'deal' with her to get her to eat a more balanced meal. She absolutely refuses to try new foods and I don't push her too hard on it because I don't want her to have food anxiety.
She also won't exercise too much. Today is absolutely beautiful and I wanted her to go for a walk with me but she tried bribing me to get her come with me (she wanted me to buy her a pack of gum). I asked her if she wanted to go ride her bike but still no. She says she gets enough exercise hanging out in her room. Last year she was up to a red belt in taekwondo and other than passing the test for black belt she also had to participate in a competition to receive a black belt. I took her to a competition and even though her friends were there in encourage her she refused to participate and she never went to taekwondo again. So three years of lessons and she just quit then and there. Since then I cannot get her to do any extra curricular sports or exercise in any way.
How do I get her eat better and exercise more?

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