I haven't told many people about it. Obviously my hubby and son know, because they are on the journey with me, and have to live with me, and 2 people from my (former) office know. One because he lives very close and revealed to me he has started looking to lose weight (he gained about 50 pounds in the last 3 years of working there too). So he may in fact become my workout buddy. I also told him about sparkpeople....so maybe we'll see him on here too :)
I haven't told the rest of my family or friends because they don't really need to know. When the weight starts coming off, they will notice. I always had this fantasy about losing the weight, and then doing the reveal :) I don't know if that will happen....maybe with those that I don't see often. But for family, like my mother.....I don't need them telling me how to do this and that and it's not coming off quick enough, or too fast. And what I eat....monitoring every last morsel...I already do that, I don't need someone else taking notes. As well, none of them know what it is like to be over 300 lbs, and everything we go through everyday. Their situations do not apply to me because they have not walked in my shoes.
Being accountable to Sparkpeople, and the fine people on this site is good enough for me :) This group and other fine people are very very encouraging, and joining in the challenges gives enough of a competitive edge to keep me going.
current weight: 284.6
Fitness Minutes: (664) Posts: 10 4/26/12 1:27 P
I agree, although I am so excited right now that I have shared it with a few people. I regret sharing this with a family member who always makes me feel bad and feel as though she is patronizing me. She can say "good for you" in such a way that I feel as tall as a pen.
Oh, well. I'm trying not to let her reaction effect my action. I'm doing well so far and I just need to remind myself that I'm doing this for myself and not for her.
I was also very leery of who I told that I was going on this lifestyle change. I felt that the more people I told the more people were watching me and it seemed like there was an expectation to see me fail. They want me to fail so they are okay with their own failures in the weight loss area. I know that sounds crazy but that's what it felt like to me. That's how I felt then.
Two years ago I dropped 80 lbs in a summer but the bad part was I didn't see or feel a change in myself. So i quit. I regret that decision now (since I have to relose that 80 plus a little) but its a life lesson learned. So I do and don't feel like failure. I do because I regained the weight but I don't because it was my own decision to give it up. So its an inner demon I gotta face.
The other thing that really bothers me is when other people tell me the right way to loose weight. You have to do this, this, and this and the only thing i'm typically thinking is "if that all i have to do, then why aren't you thinner". I don't mind them suggesting maybe a new exercise or a recipe but don't tell me what i'm doing is wrong.
Now I don't really care. My reasons for want to get this weight off has slightly changed. I have a better reason to stay focused over time. I now have a blog, sumdumbgi.blogspot.com/ . I also post my new blogs on my facebook wall. I have no idea if anybody is reading them but its out there. For the most part I have a pretty supportive family.
I wish you the best of luck on your weight loss journey. I hope you have much success and let me know if I can help in some way :)
To give anything less than your best is to sacrafice the gift -Steve Prefontaine
If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get, what you've got. -unknown
You are exactly right! Although it is important to have support, sometimes the people around you aren't the ones to get it from. If you get a chance, read my blog, Through Thick and Thin, and see what I have gone through by comments from "well-meaning friends and co-workers". I now have become very strict about not discussing it with anyone but my immediately family and my medical staff. I will still get comments like "What is THAT you are eating?" or "You're not eating enough; you're going to fail!" etc., etc., etc. My stock answer is "My health and personal habits are not open for discussion. I am under medical supervision and am doing exactly what I am supposed to, but thank you for your concern.". I am finding the comments are a lot less frequent when I stand firm. Thank God for Spark People, where you can discuss these things in a safe and caring environment and get REAL support!
Sometimes when you announce it to the world it puts mega stress on you. So I have found the fewer people the better. Except of course your spark friends and they understand the ups and downs and are there to support you through thick and thin.
"Anything is possible, It's your choice whether or not you choose to make IT happen."
"If a man really wants something he will find a way, if he doesn't he will find an excuse." Stephen Dolley, Jr.
current weight: 182.6
Fitness Minutes: (45,784) Posts: 7,911 3/31/12 7:14 P
I never announced to any one that I was going on a "diet" I did let my family know I wanted to have the lap band surgery and everyone supported me, then I found out I could not have it due to a medical condition, I kept on a healthy life style because I was determined to get healthy, I still did not announce to any one I at work. after 3 months people started to notice my weight loss. then they all knew.
I havent told anyone I'm trying to lose weight again either. Yes it is a lifestyle change. I had lost 50 pounds a few years ago and I told everyone I was changing my life. Well I put the 50 back on and an additional 30 pounds. I feel like such a failure. That's why this time I'm not telling anyone either and when it becomes noticeable that I'm losing I'm just going to down play it also. Good luck on your journey AZURESEAS! We are all here for you!
Dory from NW Ohio
Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life, tip toe if you must but take the step.
No, just here on SparkPeople. (And of course my doctors:)
I'll go a step further, I don't talk about diets or dieting, period. If someone starts talking about the latest diet they're on or how they need to lose weight, or how they shouldn't have eaten this or that, I never comment and change the subject. To me it's one of the most boring and unproductive subjects around and from hearing other's conversations it usually turns in to a big whine fest.
And it's not about failing either. I've always been this way, even when I was at normal weight. You either do it or you don't.
Thank God for SparkPeople though or else I'd be in a looney bin somewhere, LOL!
So glad you posted! Don't forget to make your SparkPage. It's a great way to receive support and for everyone to get to know you better:)
I don't tell many people I'm trying to lose weight either. I just want to get to it and do it and they'll notice along the way. This team is very encouraging and supportive. Anytime, you need encouragement or support, just ask for it.
In the meantime,
Pounds lost: 14.0
Fitness Minutes: (6,316) Posts: 11 3/30/12 8:23 P
I decided this time that I am not announcing to all who know me - I'm on a weight loss journey! There are only 2 people that know what I'm doing. The doctor that is helping me recover from a car accident, and the man that told me about SparkPeople. I have plenty of friends who have declared themselves on a diet of some sort and I am happy for them and support their effort. Where it gets weird is when I ask them how they are doing and they avoid answering the question or answer in a monosyllable. It makes me sad because I wouldn't judge them or turn into the food police on them. I know how that feels to be judged. I'm going to do the work, be accountable to myself and enjoy the small victories. At some point my family and friends will notice the change in me and I'll downplay what I've been up to. Just give them enough info so they won't think I have an illness. This is a lifestyle I want to create for me, in the way I choose. Thanks for letting me share.
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