your not alone...i tried so hard to maintain this last year and instead i gained back 30 of the 95 lbs id lost. I've let the world get me down and I'm feeling like I'm at the bottom. i tell my self every morning, this day is going to be different. I'm going to walk today, I'm going to excersise for just 10 min. I'm go to eat just fruits and veggies. I'm not going to binge. I'm going to control it today. and then BAM there it is another day past and I've done all the things i said i was not going to do and i did none of the things i said i would.
I feel like such a failure. i blame it on all the stress I've had, the loss of family, home and finances. I blame it on my husband for not being supportive and saying negative things to me, or not being willing to simply go for a 15 min walk with me.
The fact is, its me. Just plain me. even now as i sit here and write this I want to blame everything else and everyone eles around me.
so today i decided that the first step is to admit that i have a problem...i have done this before and i know that i can do this again. so I did just 10 min of excersise. and then i did the unthinkable i ate ...not just a small snack to reenergize me, but i started and didnt stop. so now I'm going to do something else, I'm going to go for a walk. i started a pot of rice so that i would have it already cooked in the fridge. and I'm going to go shopping for some more veggies and prepare them in small meals and put them in containers and have them ready to grab when i feel like i want something to eat.
one of my biggest problems right now is sugar. so now that I've admitted it I'm going to do something about it.
I'm coming out of the darkness of my hiding and I'm going to put some light on this evil that is trying to evade me.
i know that i cant do it alone. i know that i have to be open and honest about what i am doing. the only person that i lye to is me. and no matter where i go to try to hide, I'm always there. i want to be able to look in the mirror again and say I like me.
i want to not only ask for support but i want to be supportive. so I'm coming back to be more active again... yep again...I'm really going to try
| Pounds lost: 0.0