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LADYIRIS313's Photo LADYIRIS313 Posts: 926
6/14/09 5:32 P

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Hi everyone!

Leslie, I feel what you are saying. I was just looking today at the Spark report on my goal weight, and I am still over what my RED goal line says I 'ought' to be.

Well, after reading this thread, I'm not going to let it get me down. I'm really starting to 'get' that this isn't short term - this is my life we're talking about. It's not a race, and every day, every little time I make a 'better' choice, that is a huge victory. We ALL have much to celebrate.

We're learning, we're getting stronger, and we did the best we could with what we knew. Now we know some new things, have some new tools, and while we may not be perfect, we ARE getting better every day.

The scale might not budge, but I bet we've all seem some improvement every week - a stronger back, better sleep, more endurance, better stress tolerance, looser shorts (!!), or better skin from all that water (lol). Use whatever measure of success you can muster and cling to that, because its REAL and it matters.

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Edited by: LADYIRIS313 at: 6/14/2009 (17:33)
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us
are looking at the stars"

Oscar Wilde


 Pounds lost: 8.0 
 
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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,515
5/18/09 7:25 P

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I just wanted to acknowledge you again for getting on the scale and finding out where you're at in terms of weight. However, following your plan sounds like a great idea. Our real peace of mind comes from our acceptance of ourselves and our habits. You will know when you are being reasonable with yourself about your eating and exercising-at least, I hope so. It's likely your weight will come down when you do that, but it may not be as you picture it. You'll still have plenty to pat yourself on the back for. You're already an inspiration to me just by coming here and posting. Please keep up with us.
emoticon

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


1,821 Days since:  I began the NO S lifestyle
 
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RACHELRB's Photo RACHELRB Posts: 1,485
5/18/09 12:53 P

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Leslie,
So glad to hear you faced the metal monster! It sounds like you have a plan in place. Remember, the scale is stupid and does not know that you are exercising and eating healthy. Don't beat yourself up when the scale is not responding to your efforts. At one point on my journey I switched to weighing in every 2 weeks because I got frustrated with the 1 week turnarounds.

If you win 51% of the battles you have won the war.
LESLIEJ's Photo LESLIEJ Posts: 473
5/18/09 11:38 A

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Hi,
thank you for your kind replies. I was torn about whether to weigh myself.I wavered back and forth, and decided I needed to face it. My worst fear was that I had gained all of the weight back and then some. My highest weight was 293 lbs... I was terrified I'd be over 300. I needed to know, and to know where I am starting from. So I finally did get on the scale and I weigh 275 lbs. That's a lot, but still, better than I thought it would be. So I'm starting from there.
I plan to weigh in once a week, but otherwise focus on my plan, which is exercise, drinking water, sticking with real food (not junk food), getting adequate sleep and rest, and eating a healthy breakfast. It is a simple plan, and a good place to begin my journey again.

Once more, thank you SO MUCH for your support. MUCH appreciated!!
Hugs,
Leslie

ps - Susan, thanks for the reminder about the Shrink Yourself program. You're right, I did much better while doing that program. I still have a membership, and I'm going to get involved with the site again. Also, I printed out all the workbooks, and I'll reread them. emoticon

Edited by: LESLIEJ at: 5/18/2009 (11:39)
NEVER GIVE UP - go over, go under, go around or go through, but never give up!


 current weight: 263.0 
 
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RACHELRB's Photo RACHELRB Posts: 1,485
5/17/09 10:49 P

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Leslie,
You have already received some great and insightful feedback here. I would like to add some simple thoughts.

You haven't lost the battle till you actually give up. It sounds like you're back and you haven't given up. You are learning to love and take care of yourself. There was a bump in the road (perhaps a big bump!) but you are getting right back on course. If you are getting on the scale to measure your progress that's cool, but don't beat yourself up. Thank yourself for being good to yourself and recognizing it's time to get healthy again. We take all posters here- you don't have to be thin/fat/good/bad You are just you and that's what we are looking for.

If you win 51% of the battles you have won the war.
SUSANHKS's Photo SUSANHKS Posts: 891
5/17/09 1:27 P

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Leslie, I didn't recognize you from prior posts so I went to look at your recent posts and saw that you did the online course last year and were doing really well. If you later got off track, I would try to think of this now as practicing the skill of refining the skill of Bouncing Back, and learning what makes you bounce back.

I can really relate to you because 8 years ago I lost 75 pounds and then gained 85 back. Then I started the online course last August and have lost over 50 of it again.

Because of my known history of losing alot of weight and then gaining it all back, I have been trying to figure out and make a plan for how I am going to keep from doing that this time. One thing I realized was that I often didn't "keep my weight in mind" and I never really bounced back. Now whenever I have a little slip up and get off track--- I try to get right back on track, the same day or the next day, and think of myself as practicing the skill of bouncing back.

However, the real challenge will come when I have lost all the weight and go to maintenance. I realize what didn't happen last time was that there was never an event or a weight that triggered me to Bounce Back. I am making myself a Bounce Back plan-- telling myself that if I ever gain 10 pounds I will rejoin Shrink Yourself online and actively re-work the habits and post there, and also will join up for that next month's Done Girl Buddy Support System. (Actually right now I'm still doing the online course and I think that is part of what is keeping me doing well, but I hope to eventually not need the course anymore.)

Anyway--- I think as you plan to get back on the scale-- tell yourself you are merely trying to help yourself Keep Your Weight In Mind and then think of yourself as practicing Bouncing Back. Whatever feelings or behaviors you notice can then be part of your learning experience of increasing the skill of Bouncing Back.

For people like you and I with a history of losing and regaining, I think developing the skill of Bouncing Back, but especially getting the ability to understand that inner rebel and learn to Bounce Back quickly, instead of months or years later, will be the key for lasting change.

Susan

SW 8/1/08 229.




 current weight: 153.0 
 
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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,515
5/17/09 12:33 P

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Leslie,

I'm sorry to hear you are so torn over the scale. Obviously, you must think there is some benefit to facing what you weigh. Personally, I agree with you, as long as there is not some secret need to feel guilty and miserable. It sounds like you are judging yourself terribly, or will, according to what you weigh. No matter what has been, and no matter what you have done, you can only start from today. It is unlikely that you are going to suddenly never eat to soothe yourself again and you won't be able to avoid all upsetting situations that might make you want to eat, so all you can do is move forward with the work of the book. It's not a crime to eat too much!

I'd say you should have a plan for your day. Plan something pleasant (non-food related) and plan something that will help solve a problem that you have in your life that is not food related. Also be sure you have the tools for following the Ten Healthy Habits: a variety of foods, clean exercise clothes, etc. Then have weighing yourself be just one blip in the day. You can face your thoughts and your feelings about it but don't keep dwelling on it, going over the same thoughts. If you find yourself doing that, DO SOMETHING ELSE, preferably something engaging that isn't eating. Facing feelings doesn't mean dwelling on them. The thoughts that produce those feelings are usually irrational anyway, so vow to see your life in more reasonable terms and reach within for the grownup that you are. And go on and live your day. There are so many things to be done that have nothing to do with food! emoticon

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


1,821 Days since:  I began the NO S lifestyle
 
0
462
925
1387
1850
LESLIEJ's Photo LESLIEJ Posts: 473
5/17/09 11:01 A

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Hi,
I haven't been posting alot - avoiding posting, actually. I have been avoiding alot over the last months - avoiding exercising, avoiding eating healthy, avoiding making healthy choices for myself. About the only thing I haven't been avoiding is overeating and binging. I had lost 103 lbs, and now I've regained it - maybe all of it, by now... maybe more?
I haven't weighed myself for months. I thought I could track my weight with the clothes I fit, but I think that is not precise enough. So today I'm going to weigh myself. I am terrified!!
I know I need to face the scale, but I'm afraid of the results, and of what my reaction to the number will be. What if it is worse than I think it is? What if seeing what I weigh sends me deeper into overeating. What if I get overwhelmed and give up? How can I get myself into the right place 'head wise' to face the scale?

I really need some suggestions and support to do this. Can someone please help me?
Hugs for all,
Leslie


NEVER GIVE UP - go over, go under, go around or go through, but never give up!


 current weight: 263.0 
 
293
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231.5
200.75
170
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