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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
9/12/08 7:27 A

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I'm totally awed at your progress, Shannon! I can't imagine 18 days binge free at this point, not to mention 21. And you say this is your third time?
I've fallen off the wagon, yet I forgive myself. I realize I haven't developed the resources yet to replace what food does for me. It's not that other pleasures don't compare; it's that they are not as available or convenient. I love dancing, but when I'm rushing between obligations, I can't stop and take a dance class, but I can chomp away on cookies in the car. Something else has to come into play to give me the strength or patience to wait for other gratifications. I have done it in the past, and I will again. I'm still not wringing my hands and weeping over it, which is a good thing for me. It was not at those moments that I made any momentous decisions. So I do what I can to eat well at least part of the day. And gear up with thoughts and posts like this. emoticon

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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SHANNONSNAIL's Photo SHANNONSNAIL SparkPoints: (0)
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9/11/08 4:55 P

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How am I doing?

I have been mostly focusing on staying binge-free since that is my biggest issue and today I am 18 days binge-free. I am hoping to hit 21 days (21 days makes a habit, right?) and if so it will be the third time since I started tracking it.

I think once the binge eating is under control it will be time to move onto general overeating due to emotional reasons and begin working on that.

I have come to the conclusion recently that while I might have "weight loss goals" my focus must be on curbing my bingeing and emotional eating behaviors rather than focusing on a "number". I have accepted that I may not real my "goal weight" in the timing that I would like but rather, I must push on to reaching my goals in changing my behavior around and relationship with food.

~Shannon


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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
9/9/08 11:50 P

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How did i do today? I made progress. I had fallen off the deep end for awhile, buying 11 oz. bags of M & M's and eating them all in 24 hours or less, even though I had packed nice meals and snacks to take with me to work and beyond. Today, I didn't!

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
9/5/08 12:55 A

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I had to move out of my house on July 23 and am still not reorganized from that. Had to start back to work and it's the hot season, so not much will get straightened out at home. Don't even know where my SY book is! I'm doing only the minumum online, yet I still think of this as the last piece in the puzzle and know when I get in the swing of things again, it will be this I use as my guide, and not a diet. In the meantime, I'm using food, but I refuse to let that weigh me down more than it needs to. I'm beginning now.

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 55,284
8/26/08 11:51 P

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I just love reading "SHRINK YOURSELF" because I keep learning new things about myself each day.

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SHANNONSNAIL's Photo SHANNONSNAIL SparkPoints: (0)
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8/1/08 10:47 A

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Jibbie: I use the yoga strap to stretch my calf and hamstring muscles. I have terrible plantar fasciitis so I do this every morning before I get out of bed and then also whenever I exercise and any other chance I get. It gives a really nice stretch!

~Shannon


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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 55,284
8/1/08 1:44 A

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I went all out today and bought a YOGA STRAP for $3.49 that has velcro on the end so you can secure your foot for various poses. I've always talked myself out of buy on before saying "It isn't necessary." emoticon

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BANNORB's Photo BANNORB Posts: 215
7/30/08 5:23 P

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How did it go after dance class?

Beth

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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
7/27/08 4:33 P

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I've done well so far today, but am feeling a bit nervous because the last few times I've gone to dance class, I've ended up ee'ing afterwards, which is a new behavior for me. I used to count on not eating until later when I waas hungry after dance. Haven't examined it much yet; I'm hoping that by posting before I go, I'll feel more accountable to stay on track. Not staying at my house now, so computer access is spotty. I'll assume I'm being wished luck!

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 55,284
7/27/08 12:29 A

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I've been listening to clips on YouTube on Procrastination and one guy says we procrastinate because as children we were FORCED by our parents to do things and we rebel now. Dr. Gould talks about our Rebellious self. I didn't realize how strong that was in my nature and what a problem I have made it for myself. emoticon

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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 55,284
7/25/08 2:02 A

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I find reading the book just gives me MORE motivation, because Dr. Gould is so "on the money" about feelings and being truthful about how to get POWER. It just makes me KNOW that I have the formula to win. emoticon

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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 55,284
7/19/08 12:23 A

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We picked our son up from the airport as he has moved home now for the next year before he starts to medical school and we all went to eat at "CHILI'S" and I was very good. I got a Pita Steak Sandwich and over the objection of the waiter told him to cut it in 1/2. I gave 1/2 to my dd, Maggie, who'd just gotten an appetizer. It was a huge plate of nachos. BUT, I did great and was satisfied.

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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
7/18/08 6:37 P

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I just got hungry for lunch and had some delicious pasta with pesto, broccoli, and a few tablespoons of cottage cheese.

However, this morning I finished off a bag of chocolate chips I had started on last night. I knew I was going to have a lot to divert me from eating during the morning, so I justified it that way. Another way I see that I often justify eating junk food is if it is "good enough." I'll go into one of the little discount stores I go to, thinking that I won't buy any junk unless there is some thing really good emoticon . Somehow, that seems logical at the time, as if there isn't tons of really good food available almost all the time! and, so what! What has that got to do with whether or not I'm hungry and if it what i need at the moment? That's the addiction talking!

Anyway, the rest of the day looks good. I've got specific things I need to and can do to get ready for having my foundation worked on next week and then I am going to a dance class. When I come home, after my shower, I'll have my date (he doesn't know we have this date) with The Dog Whisperer on the National Geographic channel. Then to bed.

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
7/16/08 1:26 A

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I did actually get hungry twice today and had nice, "clean" meals, plus a clean snack when I wasn't really hungry because I knew my calories were so low, and I had not had enough fruit/veggie servings. I feel pretty good about the lack of emotional eating and the connection between hunger and eating.


*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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SHANNONSNAIL's Photo SHANNONSNAIL SparkPoints: (0)
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7/15/08 3:46 P

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Oolala,

Sometimes you just have to do what you can do. I've been through a lot of illness over the last couple years and would get really upset that I could not be out exercising or couldn't really work on eating healthier since the illnesses supressed my appetite or the medication to treat my illness made me gain weight (it really did - prednisone!).

At any rate, one of the things I've learned through these trying times is to do what I can. If I can lift little 5 lb weights for bicep curls, well, then I'd just do that. Even something small can make a difference. Work on the things that you can while you deal with the circumstances of your life and you will not allow those circumstances to cause you to feel powerless (and we know where takes you, right??).

Hang in there!!
Shannon

~Shannon


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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
7/15/08 2:38 P

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The last few days have continued to be a wash. I have not been willing to take advantage of the gap between the itch and the scratch. Today, I can't take credit because I am back on a medication that depresses my appetite. All versions of the med do the same thing. It might sound like heaven, but it's not when you are trying to respect the body's natural signals for food. I have to eat when i'm not hungry because otherwise I could go ten hours easy, and I know my body needs food. Oh, well, I'm still going to try to monitor my feelings periodically throughout the day.

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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SHANNONSNAIL's Photo SHANNONSNAIL SparkPoints: (0)
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7/11/08 12:00 P

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"Chinese food not make you fat" - oh my, you're killin' me! I LOVE Chinese and do not think I can stop when I eat it so in my case, it might make me fat!

So, I started something new this week - tracking my food. I had taken about a 4 mth or more hiatus from tracking because it seemed to trigger bingeing - like I felt too controlled or would be disappointed when the numbers weren't what I wanted. Anyway, I am terribly behind in my weight loss goals so it dawned on me to try the tracking again. Today was Day 4 (binge free and tracking) and it is going pretty well. Today I weighed and I have lost the 2.8 lbs I put on during my DC trip over the 4th so I was glad to see that. In regards to my weight goals, I should have lost 4 lbs at this point to reach my goal by next May and I've only lost 0.2 but I am not going to dwell on that - just keep on trucking.

~Shannon


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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 55,284
7/10/08 1:00 A

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Okay, if you are AWARE when you buy the chocolate and give yourself PERMISSION, then that isn't a big deal. It is just when you have to argue with "Harriet" over the behavior that it gets to be a problem. I went to eat lunch with my daughter yesterday and she said "I want to eat at Subway." She has lost 34# since being on SparkTeens and has changed her eating habits. I told her "I'm having Chinese, because Paul McKenna says to Eat what you Love." I only ate 1/2 of the order and was full and took the rest home for my son. The lady at the Chinese take-out said "Where have you been?" I told her I'd lost 35# on Sparkpeople and hadn't been eating Chinese for a good while. She said "Chinese food not make you fat." emoticon She's right, I'm sure it was all those chips and cookies late at night.

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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
7/9/08 11:56 A

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Jibbie, I'm glad you know who[m] you're talkin' to-I can take some good-natured ribbing, and even appreciate it because it reminds me in the end that 1) it ain't personal, and 2) our human foibles are absurd and funny. I ate 12 oz. of chocolate in a day: shoot me at dawn! What did I do, kill somebody? Okay, I know my health may be at stake and I can't make too light of it, but I really believe I am on the downhill on this emotional eating thing, and not alike a smoker who says s/he can quit anytime. It's just that I have made so many changes over the years that are solid. but, anyway, I get a bag of Hershey's Nuggets-truffles of milk chocolate filled with chocolate creme. That's 12 ounces. Believe me, before I buy them I have talked myself out of them several times-just not the last time! I posted on the book chapter 3 (on powerlessness) thread on this issue and the motivation. Excuses! excuses!

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 55,284
7/9/08 12:35 A

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WOW, let me see. 12 oz. of chocolate is like 6 Hershey's bars, right? When are you BUYING these? (I'm saying this in a really nice voice.) That is the point at which you need to talk with "Harriet" and tell her that you are not bringing this HOME, because it is controlling you and you can't eat it and feel GOOD about yourself.
In reading SY, I have gotten a lot out of Dr. Gould talking about "Harriet" that inner voice. I've called my INNER BRAT, SPONDULEX, because when I was a kid, my mother said that a Spondulex was German for a "brat kid like Dennis the Menace." (Bart Simpson, now.)
I know that my Inner Voice LIES like the Devil, always promising me that TOMORROW will be different, and then after I eat it, or don't exercise, boy, do I get the NEGATIVE TALK. You know just what I mean.

WE are all in this together. emoticon

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WEN@TBAY's Photo WEN@TBAY Posts: 752
7/8/08 7:58 A

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Hi Oohlala,

I'm sorry to hear that you've been struggling lately. But I am glad to hear that you are wanting to and turn it around and get back on track & I know you can do it! emoticon
The LBF 21 day challenge helped me to get some accountability in this area- - Binge eating is my biggest challenge. Working through the issues presented in the SY book has also been extremely helpful as well. But my most recent "Secret Weapon" has been the free downloadable relaxation / guided imagery downloads from the Paul McKenna (I Can Make You Thin) spark board (Early on under the Links for Newbies thread) I have found it to be amazingly effective. Check it out!

emoticon

Wendie

Life is a gift! Tear into it!!!

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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
7/7/08 9:10 P

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Okay, the truth of the matter is I have sucked at this for several days, averaging 12 ounces of chocolate a day, plus some cookies or something like that extra. Amazingly, I am more likely to get stuffed from eating an extra slice of bread than I am from that, which is part of the problem. I know also part of it is the lack of structure in my days and anxiety over some projects I should be taking action on. I'm going to peruse the book and do one of the daily challenges: do a combination of a minimum of 15 minutes of reading and posting to the thread associated with the chapter read. And I will absolutely wait until I am hungry to eat again today-which may take me into tomorrow.

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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WEN@TBAY's Photo WEN@TBAY Posts: 752
6/28/08 11:05 P

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Good job on not beating yourself up over the piece of cake. I find that an occasional indulgence makes me feel like a normal eater and that really is my goal, after all. It will take me a bit longer to get to my goal weight but I need to learn how to handle treats and parties and all the rest and if I don't do it on the way to getting to my goal weight then how on earth will I be able to stay at my goal weight? Balance & Moderation is the key, I think.

This week I had some chips with my lunch and today at the movies I brought a Dove chocolate square so that I could enjoy a treat while everyone else was. It was just enough and I didn;t feel deprived at all.

: ) Wendie

Life is a gift! Tear into it!!!

Total Wt Lost: 36.2 lbs




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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
6/28/08 11:36 A

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Thanks for the encouragement. Yesterday, I did an unusual thing, which was to eat rich food after a dance class. I got to take a shower right after the class (we sweat like we're in the tropics!), which always makes me feel extra good, but it also allowed me to go to a going-away party where there was cake. someone cut me a gargantuan piece. Usually, I'd just go ahead and cut it down myself and put the extra back or on a new plate, but I felt self-concscious and didn't do it. Plus it had a kind of frosting that represents PLEASURE to me and I just tucked into it. I don't feel horrible about it and I notice that I'm trying not to be scared because I can usually count on eating sanely after I work out. I think I'll have to journal more about this later.

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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WEN@TBAY's Photo WEN@TBAY Posts: 752
6/26/08 11:27 P

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Hi OOhlala,

Sorry that you are having some bumps in the road with your relationship. I tend to be oversensitive so there may be a chance that your reading into his vibe and jumping the gun? Either way, I find that if I am going through something tuff (even if it's just PMS, which has gotten to be quite a bear at my age I might add!) I allow / plan in some chocholate into my food plan that week. It lessens the guilties and usually I can handle a small, preplanned amount rather than grazing on them. My treat of choice is the Dove dark chocholate squares. They are rich and filling and the dark chocholate is healthier than the milk. Just a thought. Two of them are around 70-100 calories --that and a cup of coffee or a glass of milk is soothing and filling. You are so lovely, and eloquent and intelligent... if he really is giving off a bolt vibe I must say, "Good Riddance!!"

emoticon

Wendie

Life is a gift! Tear into it!!!

Total Wt Lost: 36.2 lbs




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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
6/26/08 7:39 P

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Today wasn't so great. I thought I was keeping my cool in a new relationship, but I got the "getting ready to bolt" vibe from him last night, and although I have been using many mental techniques to deal with this, I've also been popping the Hershey's Nugget Truffles. I guess I'm just not ready to give up the pleasure of them in the present. It sounds so crazy as I write it, knowing the possible repercussions. I've been emotional eating (ee-ing) over the last week anyway and have miraculously not really gained much, which is a double-edged sword. But, I am doing the best I can, is what I have to say to myself. Or maybe I have to sit with the hurt a little more? I wonder if I have that "best" in me?

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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WEN@TBAY's Photo WEN@TBAY Posts: 752
6/16/08 2:47 P

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Hi There,

I totally agree! I loved Paul McKenna's program, "I can make you thin" becuase I hate dieting! It taught me some great things too ( never got the book, though. I taped it on tivo) But the book "Shrink Yourself "is really pulling it all together for me since emotional eating is what has packed on the pounds all these years.

The only reason I 've went off carbs ( and started craving them) was becuase I was trying to clear up a Urinary Tract infection and my friend insisted that i needed to avoid all carbs for a week and then do a green vegetable juice fast for 1 day and it would clear it up ( and it did!)

: ) Wendie



Life is a gift! Tear into it!!!

Total Wt Lost: 36.2 lbs




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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 55,284
6/15/08 11:31 P

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I read "Shrink Yourself" before I read "I Can Make You Thin" by Paul McKenna and started listening to his CD for hypnosis. Paul says "Eat what you want." That is one of his four rules. I can see so much sense in what he says. Of course, he does say that if you can't STOP, then the food is controlling you, so avoid it. That is where Dr. Gould's information comes into play. So, I find understanding the emotional issue the most important for the long term.

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WEN@TBAY's Photo WEN@TBAY Posts: 752
6/12/08 7:38 P

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Well I'm not sure if it was the weather, or having an online course to finish up, or if avoiding all carbs is getting to me ( i did have a tiny amt of fresh blueberris with cottage cheese for breakfast today though!) but I thought about food all day long today. I am STILL thinking about food and I just ate dinner 1.5 hours ago!! It poured today and I just kept having to drag my mind away from the fridge. I kept watching the clock and finally let myself have a snack at 4:15. In my defense I am eating alot less than normally. ( No carbs = No fun!) What a brat. I did make some wonderful fresh broccoli and string beans. And tuna salad. And a turkey burger. But i want hummus and oatmeal and brown rice!!!! AGGGH! Just a few more days and BAM! Back to normal I hope!

: ) Wendie

Life is a gift! Tear into it!!!

Total Wt Lost: 36.2 lbs




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WEN@TBAY's Photo WEN@TBAY Posts: 752
6/7/08 11:56 A

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Hi, Just checking in. How did you do at your big celebration thingie?
Hope all is well!
: ) Wendie

Life is a gift! Tear into it!!!

Total Wt Lost: 36.2 lbs




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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
6/7/08 10:55 A

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yesterday, I did eat when I wasn't particularly hungry, but I don't feel it was overboard at all. I think I'm at a stage where it's realistic for me to have something to eat sometimes when I'm not hungry. I don't have to gnash my teeth about it. I've got today set out loosely, and it looks pretty "safe." I'm going to a big celebration at a meditation center tonight and I know I will want to be able to sample what looks best there, so I'll have that as incentive to eat in accordance during the day, not starving, but making the best possible choices on the way. I'll be accountable to you about it tomorrow!

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp


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WEN@TBAY's Photo WEN@TBAY Posts: 752
6/5/08 8:58 P

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Just checking in. Had a tiff with my DH ( he is driving me batty lately...then again, maybe it's me!)
Anyhoo, just touching base for a little bit of accountability. I'm ok as long as I stay in the office. The minute I head toward the couch / tv it gets a tad iffy. I am taking a sublingual B vitamin, making a large ice water with lemon and finishing up in here. I will hit the hay early tonight --was up a bit late last night and have been taking an online course all day. I'm pretty drun beat! Night all!
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Life is a gift! Tear into it!!!

Total Wt Lost: 36.2 lbs




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WEN@TBAY's Photo WEN@TBAY Posts: 752
6/5/08 11:28 A

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Great job on handling that cake. ! emoticon

I too had a dessert brought to me by my daugher and her friend that they had baked. I had a taste and it was great. I scheduled a small piece for after dinner since it was my TOM and I knew I'd be in the mood for something sweet. I had it, I enjoyed it and I didn't binge. Feels great!

Life is a gift! Tear into it!!!

Total Wt Lost: 36.2 lbs




 Pounds lost: 36.2 
 
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OOLALA53's Photo OOLALA53 Posts: 8,306
6/4/08 7:30 P

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There was a faculty meeting this afternoon which included some tributes to retiring teachers. Cake with luscious frosting was served. I had a piece with a good amount of frosting. I enjoyed it and was glad I had it. I don't feel like eating more now. It was a pleasure and it was enough.

*"The goal of weight loss is incompatible with recovering from disordered eating." Center for Clinical Interventions
*The No S Diet saved my emotional life! Four years and counting. nosdiet.com/ *Be happy with this moment. This moment is your life.
*Get to the next meal hungry!
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1,660 Days since:  I began the NO S lifestyle
 
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GODDESSNESS's Photo GODDESSNESS Posts: 98
5/14/08 9:34 A

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I think it might be a good idea to keep track of our failures and successes, as well as considering the reasons why we don't do well on some days and how we can do better in the future.

I'll start. Today I began a binge again, but luckily nipped it in the bud. It started with a candy bar, which turned into two. That became a bag of babybels and ended in a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. As I was eating the sandwich, I stopped and asked myself what I was doing. Essentially, I was pigging out on "forbidden" foods. So I gently reminded myself that no foods are forbidden - all have been created for us to enjoy. I was able to slow down my eating and actually taste and enjoy the rest of my sandwich. The binge stopped there and I've been fine since then.

I think what went wrong was that I waited until 11am to eat. By then, I was hungry and eager to gobble up anything I could find. In future, I'll make sure that I stick to my scheduled meal and snack times.

~ Vicky, the vegetarian from South Africa ~



I only eat cereal that turns the milk purple - Calvin (and Hobbes)


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