Today I have been feeling really weird....I feel so disconnected...Last night when I was doing as my therapist suggested and wrote a letter to the guy who sexually assaulted me and tell him how he has hurt me, before I wrote it I was worried it was going to cause me to completely flip out and want to cut again...instead while I wrote it I totally blanked out...I remember sitting down to do it, I remember pulling out the paper and starting to write, but after that I dont remember it...When I got up this morning I wasnt sure what happened...I did write it and I tore it up like my therapist suggested but I dont remember doing it...that is so weird...Then today while I was talking to her during my appointment I did about the same thing...my therapist had to pull me back and lead me through some grounding excersizes, I have had this happen before it happened a couple times when I was in school, I would miss whole lectures because something would trigger a flashback...but not quite like this...Right now I am really feeling lightheaded and disconnected...I think I just need some sleep now...sigh...anyway that is what is going on for me right now...just feeling weird...haha...big warm angel hugs for all.
Even the smallest people can change the course of the future. -Galadriel, Lord of the Rings fellowship of the ring.
Around here we don't look backwards for very long. We keep moving forward, opening new doors and doing new things, because we're curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths. -Walt Disney, Meet the Robinsons
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