This may not be best for our group...but it is funny.
SCOTCH AND WATER
A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, 'I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 68th birthday and it's today.'
The bartender says, 'Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink. In fact, this one is on me.' As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, 'I would like to buy you a drink, too.'
The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water.' Hello my fellow Canadians, the sun is shining brightly. have a super duper day......'Coming up,' says the bartender.
As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, 'I would like to buy you one, too' The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water.'
'Coming right up,' the bartender says. As he gives her the drink, he says, 'Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?'
The old woman replies, 'Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor. Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue.'
Edited by: BKP4166 at: 4/27/2008 (02:23)
Kathy from Oregon
60+LQQKing to Lose 50+
It's foolish to ask God to direct your steps, if you aren't willing to move your feet.
Next time you use a pair of rubber gloves, You're going to smile when you think of this:
A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his Gloves.
'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked.
'No, I don't,' she replied.
'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size.'
She didn't crack a smile.
'Oh, well. I tried,' he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.
'What's so funny?' he asked
'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'
Gotta watch those little old ladies! Their minds are always working!
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