First of all, I definitely would have had a problem with this on many levels. The little girl didn't need to be treated any differently. Should any of the children have had two pieces of pie. I understand letting them have more on Thanksgiving, but my guess would be that with their current weight none of the three children have learn to balance treats and healthy food. For me, I make it a point to talk to my parents and in-laws about what I don't think is appropriate for my daughter and step-son. My in-laws love to indulge their grandchildren, sodas, cookies, cake, ice cream, pudding. You name it they give it; but since the kids haven't yet learned to balance their diet, I asked the adults in their lives to help them. Personally, I would take this experience and use it next time, talk to your mom before Christmas dinner and make sure that there is one standard for all of the children.
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I agree it's not right, but how about talking to your mom about it....give her the opportunity to discuss this with you and she may see the err of her ways.
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The little girl should not have been treated differently, if the boys were able to have a second piece so should she. That would have upset me and none one would have had a second piece. When she told the girl no, I would have taken it from the boys and thrown it away if she can't have it neither can they. Or I would have just given her a piece myself and dared anyone to take it or make a comment about it. Iw ould have sat right there beside her and enjoyed a second piece myself. It really burns me up when children attending the same gathering are not treated the same.
Fitness Minutes: (8,488) Posts: 1,838 11/29/07 12:41 P
I agree that the girl should not have been treated differently. But isn't this how it is with adults too with weight. Think about overweight men and how they are viewed as opposed to overweight women. Men are viewed as needing a little meat on their bones, but not women. My husband even says that to my kids-that they need a little meat on their bones when they are at the healthy weight for their age. Women are passing that on to their kids and thats why little girls are growing up with eating disorders and low self esteem. We should all strive to be healthy!
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Fitness Minutes: (208,459) Posts: 7,359 11/29/07 12:35 P
I don't know the situation. I personally think that Thanksgiving is one of those occassions where you should be allowed to have that extra piece, as long as the kid is not gorging him/herself. I allowed my son to have a slice of pie and 2 pieces of fudge. He is not overweight, but normally, he is allowed one dessert, just to teach him balance. Either way, I try not to make a big deal out of it. As for the discrimination, I think it is definitely wrong. I think it's telling the girl that she is being treated differently and at that age that can hurt self-esteem and/or start eating issues for her. She might get resentful and start sneaking food, for example. Of course, I don't know the circumstances of the real situation nor the relationships involved. I think it's done with, so I would let it go. I think it is something to have their parents take up with your mother. How do your siblings feel? If you want to confront your mother, it might be okay to let her know what you thought, but try not to get involved too deep, since they are not your children and it might cause family tension.
Last week at Thanksgiving dinner, both my nephews (ages 10 and 7) asked for a second piece of pie. My mother happily served it to them. When my niece, age 8, asked for a second piece of pie, my mother told her she had had enough.
All three of these kids are overweight. Why was it ok for the boys to have more pie and not the little girl? Why was it ok for anyone to have more pie?
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