Ashley - so sorry that you feel like you have no support for your healthy lifestyle from your husband. How frustrating and upsetting for you! It would be so much easier if those around us were in full support and did all the right things to help us meet our goals. The truth is, though, that they don't always and we have to find the support elsewhere. Your sparkfriends and sparkteams are a good place to start, but also your other family members, or friends in 'real life' may be able to offer the encouragement and support you need to make it this time.
It's so hard when there is little to no support at home for your efforts. I often wonder if husbands feel threatened when their wives lose weight. Do the men feel that they will also be asked to lose weight or get healthier? I believe this is how my husband thinks. He has actually gained more weight while I've been losing mine.
It may help to change your mind-set a bit. Only you can control what you do and eat. Only you can choose to exercise or not. I don't expect my family to change their eating or exercise habits for me. (It would be really great if they did!) So I just forge ahead on my own. If we eat out, I find something on the menu that fits into my food plan. I will also only eat half to one third of what is served to me. When I shop or prepare meals at home (and yes, I do most of it), then I make sure there is something for everyone. I don't expect anyone to eat like me.
This can create a fair amount of work, but it is so worth it. I will never go back to being my old size. My husband and I have been thin together and big together. This is the first time in over 30 years together that we are of different 'sizes'. We'll survive this too.
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." --Mark Twain
current weight: 163.0
Fitness Minutes: (17,933) Posts: 12,783 12/17/09 9:34 A
I had my third child in June and I have still yet to get back into losing. I just haven't had the motivation I need and hubby works so much that I pretty much take care of everything and don't have the time to eat properly like I should. I hope to get myself refreshed after the first of the year and get back into losing myself. The holidays are always the hardest for me. My hubby also says things like that as well but I have to determine to myself that I will lose anyway. Good luck and let me know if I can help.
Cherly I can do all things through Christ who strenghtens me Philippians 4:13
Hey everybody. I joined this team awhile ago but just now starting to get back on the wagon.
Recetnly I've realized that my husband is not supportive AT all with my weight loss. I had our second daughter in July. By Sept. I'd lost 30 pounds and was finally starting to love myself. Then my husband started making comments about me loseing weight and he was happy with me so he didn't understand why I kept trying to lose the weight. So slowly I started packing back on the pounds and now close to being at my heavest weight again. He has made comments about how he dosen't like me "skinny" because he is scared that I will find somebody else. That is totally not the case. I want to lose the weight for ME and nobody else.
Any ideas on how I can get him to start supporting me? It makes it really hard to keep trying when I have no motivation at home.
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