I am so pleased for you that you have found exercise that you enjoy and are reaping the benefits from it. That is a wonderful step and as you say, critical for your mental and physical health.
I'm sorry that you are sensing resentment from your husband about your time spent exercising. It is hard to know what may be causing it, but it can be anything from guilt over not exercising himself, hurt that you are spending less time with him, or any number of other reasons. The fact remains, though, that he does seem like he is feeling put out by your gym time.
While exercise is important to you and your health, I assume your marriage is also important. My suggestions would be two-fold:
(1) speak to your husband about what you are sensing and get his take on it. Most people find it easiest to broach a topic that may be sensitive when they and their spouse are relaxed and happy, not just when one of you is doing the chequebook or taxes! lol! Let him know how important exercise is to you and that you envision yourself continuing your routine. Do ask him if there is something bothering him about your exercise time. Does he miss eating dinner with you? Wish you had more time together in the late afternoon? Whatever his concern is, you cannot help to alleviate it or talk it through until you know what it is.
(2) Mae some concessions, depending on what his concerns are (if any). If he prefers to watch a movie with you on Saturday afternoons, perhaps you can schedule your exercise around that, or if he would rather you eat dinner together at a certain time, see if there are spin classes at a different time or whatever. Most happily-married couples find that a little give-and-take does wonders for their marriage. And most times, the concessions do not have to be that huge, just heart-felt.
I am a breastfeeding counsellor and many women ask me how they can manage to care for their children (especially when they are younger and need so much attention and time) and keep house without going insane or getting only 2 hours of sleep a day! I tell them, no one says you have to clean the whole house - only do that which is most important to themselves and their spouse. (for example, if their husband really hates to see dirty dishes piled up in the kitchen, but could care less about dirty laundry or the state of the bathroom, then she should concentrate any housework time she can squeeze into a day on the dishes. Likewise, if baby's father can't stand dirty smudges on the windows or glass tables, spare moments should be spent cleaning those instead of dishes or what have you). The same goes for exercise and time. Concentrate on that which is
important to you both, and leave the rest.
Edited by: CJBAGGINS at: 5/1/2009 (22:03)
The smallest good deed is better than the grandest intention.
Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.
|28 Days since: negative thoughts of myself