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MRSWILKI's Photo MRSWILKI SparkPoints: (5,940)
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9/10/11 6:29 P

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I have heard some pretty ignorant things since my husband joined 3 1/2 years ago. However, about a month ago a man was attempting to flirt with me, I told him I was married. He asked where my husband was and I responded "Afghanistan". He then took it upon himself to tell me how he really respects soldiers and a really extensive story about this guy he barely knew who was killed by an IED. I literally left the room crying. Some people have no respect. When I composed myself and came back (because my friend was waiting for me) he then proceeded to tell me I was hot and he wished I was his wife. I promptly left. The nerve. *shakes head*

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ANEENZZ's Photo ANEENZZ Posts: 447
3/3/10 7:35 A

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i've heard all of these too, i just can't believe some people! and alot of them i've gotten from friends and family members! the worst part? i'm still pretty new too! i got most of these while DH was in basic training this summer, then he was gone for AIT, then it was straight to korea for him! my fave actually came from my cousin...

"why don't you have your fun (cheat) you know he already is with those skinny korean bar girls"

yeah, i don't talk to her anymore, cause she got mad at ME for moving to korea to be with my DH!! and thankfully she was wrong, neither of us cheated...idk why just cause your military, everyone assumes your not faithful...i know alot aren't, but why do they jump to conclusions??

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WIFEOFARMYGUY's Photo WIFEOFARMYGUY Posts: 205
2/14/10 10:42 P

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How about living where they have photos blow up huge of wounded and dead and they protest on the side of the road and have anti-military propaganda outside of their homes, on their cars, etc? Yep, that was life at Fort Ord about 3.5 years ago... It was horrible to drive to parts of the community and to the beach right down the road from where they always protested. I almost rammed a pick-up that was painted to look like it had blood splattered all over it with a full sized flag flying upside down in the bed and anti war/military sayings down the side of it...

But, I have also been blessed to volunteer with people who's heart is in the best of places, struggling to help our troops when they have very little themselves.

So, I guess it comes down to what our spouses all fight for: freedom. To say and do whatever a person wants as long as it's within the confines of the law. It sucks when it's mean and ugly though...

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FATGIRL22087's Photo FATGIRL22087 Posts: 29
2/11/10 11:17 A

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Wow! I've gotten almost all of these and mostly from family who now know to steer clear of stupid questions like that to me or my husband when he gets back from a deployment! Outside the family, I've gotten 'thank yous' and hugs. But my daughter got a nasty comment about the pin she was wearing at work with her Dad's crest on it, while he was deployed the second time; the comment was, 'why would you support this war when you know we shouldn't be over there?!' And my daughter politely told her, 'this doesn't support the war. This supports my Dad who is fightin' in a war that he didn't start, but that his bosses say he has to go to because that is his job! Now will that be cash or credit, ma'am?' The lady quitely paid her tab and left, then the next woman thanked her for doing that for all the Army wives and brats!! She had to take a break after that, she was so upset by the whole thing. But I told her she was so brave to have fought for her Dad like that and not loose her composer or temper!! I was so proud of her!!

Machelle



We don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stopped playing!

The true test of character is not how much we know how to do, but how we behave when we don't know what to do- John Holtz


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CIRRUS09 Posts: 9
2/11/10 10:31 A

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I've had just about all of them too. Some from family (I think their mission was to purposly make me cry after reminding me my husband was deployed), some from people who don't get it.
My two least favorites:
so, um.. how are you doing.. and stuff?
How often do you hear from your hubby?

I haven't had the haters I read about from you guys, but I am certainly not afraid to voice my disgust when people stick their nose in my business.

Warm regards :)
Jenn

UGLYTOEBOYS Posts: 4
1/1/10 11:56 A

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I am so glad I found this blog! My husband and brother are both deployed (1st time)to Iraq and I think I can honestly say that I have been asked all but one of the things on the list. It probably doesn't help that I teach high school kids that love to talk. I really get annoyed at their ignorance, but I just have to keep telling myself that they just really don't get it. Maybe someday they will. Thanks for all of the comments. Now I don't feel so out of place. I have even avoided church and family gatherings because I didn't want to hear the ever so popular, "So, have you heard from him lately?" The only answer for that is "Every chance we get!" I love the internet and IM for that reason.

THATS_KARMA's Photo THATS_KARMA Posts: 98
12/9/09 8:46 A

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I get these from family :) My sister is the biggest offender, she came to visit us on post, looked at our house and said wow so this is where my tax dollars go

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ELISAMLW's Photo ELISAMLW SparkPoints: (0)
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4/22/09 9:29 A

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I've been an Army wife for all of a week and I've heard a lot of those already... gah. My hubby's barely started Basic Training!!

Let us run the race with endurance! (Hebrews 12:1)
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DETERMINEDAGAIN's Photo DETERMINEDAGAIN Posts: 3,553
4/20/09 2:32 P

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Lol, I totally had to share, this airman's wife was talking to me after Zumba. She was talking about how cute my husband and I are blowing kisses and stuff. She asked me if we were newlyweds and I said no, he just got back from a 16 month deployment. She goes, oh I know how you feel. My husband goes on these little trips for like 3-5 days. It's killer!!

Sigh. If only his were that "killer!"

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LABALLARD30's Photo LABALLARD30 Posts: 21
4/20/09 12:14 P

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I have gotten most if not all of these in the last 12 years I have been married to my husband. My personal favorite lately is, " Oh he's just in afghanistan. Thats not as bad as Iraq" I just want to look at them and say What do they think he is playing golf over there. No he is finding IED's and taking out the guys who did this to us all in the first place.

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SAMCHITA's Photo SAMCHITA SparkPoints: (30,433)
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4/14/09 12:29 P

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o my god u forgot "wow he's already coming back? that went by fast!!"....and " have you heard from your husband?"....aughghgh!!!!

life is too short to live it unhappy


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MRSNANABOAT's Photo MRSNANABOAT SparkPoints: (48,626)
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4/13/09 1:09 P

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I get asked a lot of these. Its like a broken record sometimes.

The only way of finding the limits of the possible is by going beyond them into the impossible.
Arthur C. Clarke


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DETERMINEDAGAIN's Photo DETERMINEDAGAIN Posts: 3,553
4/4/09 7:37 A

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I think the one comment that stick out the most in my mind is the one a German male made about how American Soldiers are evil, that they force their beliefs on people and kill to do it. I just smiled and said 'You know, that reminds me of something, what was it again? Oh that's right. Genocide. I seem to remember this country engaging in despicable acts now known as the Holocaust. Millions of innocent people from this country and others were killed mercilessly. Now what was it you were saying again?' He shut up and tried to use his hand to cover up the swastika on his forearm. Dickhead. It still boggles my mind that over half the people I've met here try to say that the Holocaust is American propaganda and it never happened.

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LISAMM1877's Photo LISAMM1877 Posts: 29
4/2/09 9:34 P

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Good Lord... I can't believe someone said that to you. I too live in a place with plenty of military families reside and I have gotten nothing but kindness and 'thank yous' for my husband. Geez, that just blows my mind.

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MEECA79's Photo MEECA79 Posts: 174
2/9/09 5:20 P

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So sad I've gotten ask all the questions and one that's not on there. We have a autistic child and someone ask did the Army cause that because my husband is deployed so much. So thank God for a great sense of humor!

Stand for for something or fall for anything.


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MEMEME10's Photo MEMEME10 SparkPoints: (0)
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2/4/09 1:30 P

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Ladies, I have gotten 1,2,5,6,7,8,9 over the years. My husband retired in '92 and recently passed away from Agent Orange related illnesses. So not only do our men risk their lives while young, its also in their retirement years.

Then you get the "but you're getting his tax free benefits" why complain about money.

The best one was from his hippie cousin who never grew up. "I should rejoice in his death. Now I can find a man who is not so sick!" Lucky the "b" was on the pacific coast while I am in KY. emoticon

"To those who have fought for it Life has a flavor that the protected will never know"....Ayn

My Husband's favorite phrase.


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CBIGELOW's Photo CBIGELOW SparkPoints: (62,319)
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1/21/09 10:18 A

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Let's face it,there are always going to be ignorant people in this world and they truly don't understand all the we military families go thru before,during and after deployments. I have also had people tell me I shouldn't be on the phone while checking out but I am like you and I always forward the phone so I don't miss his call and I don't care what I am doing so I can speak to him and if the kids are with me they get to say hi to dad also. I had someone tell me how could I stay married to someonewho kills for a living. I looked at her and said that I am proud of my husband and my father who have given her the right to say that and how does she know that she doesn't do the same thing.(my temper). So everyone Rock on





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AVNARMYWIFE's Photo AVNARMYWIFE Posts: 36
1/21/09 1:54 A

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I've gotten all them. With my temper, I'm liable to go off on people, which is usually what happends. lol. I always give them stupid answers to their stupid questions.

Tyakeia
Proud Army Wife
"Láech cach fer co forragar"
"La colère vous fait plus petit, pendant que le pardon vous force à grandir au-delà de ce que vous étiez."
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." – Confucius


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TIFBROWN's Photo TIFBROWN Posts: 37
1/18/09 5:33 P

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I have gotten 4,7,8, and 10. I love it when people I went to high school with ask me if I like being alone or if I just REALLY love my husband. That ones awesome. And number 4 killed me over and over again. He left a month before our baby was born. I wish he could have been here.

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HUNAFIT4LIFE's Photo HUNAFIT4LIFE Posts: 137
1/17/09 11:08 A

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I was in TJ Max one time getting ready to check out. I had two items, no biggie right?

As the girl was ringing me up, my husband called from Iraq. Now we all live in the world of multi-tasking and having our cell phones practically embedded to the side of our faces... so I didn't think this was anything new as I was finishing up my transaction.

Out of nowhere, the lady behind me said... "don't you think you're being rude right now?"

I am normally the one that avoids situations like these, but she caught me on a day where I was not taking crap.

So I fired back, "Don't you think you should mind your own business?"

Her, "You shouldn't be on your phone while checking out."

Me, "I happen to be on the phone with my husband who is in Iraq, and gone for 15 months, to help defend this country and you in case you forgot. Do you know anything about that? Do you go home to an empty house, do you sleep alone at night... if you are lucky to get sleep because your mind is racing with miscellaneous thoughts, and worry, and prayers? I am lucky to get to hear his voice and I don't care where I am or what I'm doing... if and when he calls... I am going to answer. So you can take your attitude and shove it or go suck one... whichever you feel like doing!!!!"

Needless to say, I was flushed, flustered, grabbed my bag and speed walked to my car. Once in, my hubby was like...dang honey... you told her... are you speeding away now?!?! I was like heck yeah... she's libel to come hunt me down!

Some people just DON'T understand... and don't catch us on the wrong day... lol

emoticon

Jenny

SHANNIT's Photo SHANNIT SparkPoints: (5,963)
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9/4/08 2:01 P

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I have gotten numbers

1, 3, 5 (from my husband), 6, 7 (over & over again), 8

I know it may be strange to get that from your husband but I guess it was not so much a suggestion, he just thought I would have already done it. And for the record, no I didnt.

I dont get too offended, because they really do not know and are just curious. I love my life and am willing to shed some light to others of the life of a military wife.

I've often gotten the, "tell your husband thank you and here's a hug for your family" Most often we get smiles and a nod of thanks. We are from the midwest and being here in Georgia, there really isnt the community "thanks and recognition" there is in the midwest. On Post, yes, I love living on post, but outside of it, its just not there.

I wasnt getting any emails of postings from here so I thought the group just went away. Sorry, I know you are all here now, so I will check in more often!

Shanni

~*~*~SHANNI~*~*~

The task ahead of you is never as great as the power behind you.
~~US ARMY

Coming together is a beginning; staying together is progress; working together is success.
~~Anonymous









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SHELLY_DAWN's Photo SHELLY_DAWN Posts: 1,933
8/15/08 9:50 A

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Make sure you brain is in gear before engaging your mouth is what i say to these ppl!

Shelly Dawn


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WIFEY2DREW's Photo WIFEY2DREW SparkPoints: (0)
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8/4/08 3:22 P

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well as being both a wife n a brat of the army i wana say that u saulte all of us who serve just like our men do we all strive to make them understand were the back bone to the men we love. its not the serveing it's the respect n honor we should all bring to the group n family we are one of a kind the wives of the millitary we do a duty that no one can out do. but for that being said we also dont egt our credit where it is due we do more then most ppl do in a day we are up with the sun n down at dawn we the back bones to a country of men or weman that so what they do. for my i am just becomeing n army wife but none the less i love doing what i do. no one gives our kids a second though either they do the same as us so as wives as sisters as children of severice men n weman stand united as we strive to make a life well served.

http://www.alohaz.com/dress_wedding.html


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MISSMISCHIEF's Photo MISSMISCHIEF Posts: 487
7/28/08 5:34 P

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While my husband was in PTRP they took all the PVTs to a minor league baseball game and he told me there were people all over the stadium standing up shaking their hands and saying thanks. And a little boy saluted him.

Never regret, regrets mean you never learned the lesson you were supposed to. Instead of getting even, make them miserable by being happy despite their attempts to rain on your parade.



LORILORENZO12's Photo LORILORENZO12 Posts: 65
7/28/08 2:24 P

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I think I have heard all of these at one point or another. Mostly I just say, "You're right, our famiy is super strong to be able to get through it." and people generally shut up. Only another military family can understand how it is. I guess I don't get too offended when I know someone is trying to be compassionate. My husband gets "thank you so much for serving" all the time and he's even had people buy his meal once or twice.

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MISSMISCHIEF's Photo MISSMISCHIEF Posts: 487
7/27/08 3:25 P

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Dude. I am so sorry you had to deal with that. I am lucky enough that I live in an area where a lot of military families live. So we get nothing like that. More often than not I am lucky enough to be told to tell my DH thanks for serving by the strangers I meet. Wow.... you're right ignorance is a "wonderful" thing. Sorry for the sarcasm.

Never regret, regrets mean you never learned the lesson you were supposed to. Instead of getting even, make them miserable by being happy despite their attempts to rain on your parade.



DEENNA's Photo DEENNA SparkPoints: (869)
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7/27/08 10:02 A

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I have heard some of those as well. My most appalling was when a mother and her two children (under 12) walked by us and the mom said to her children, her husband kills people and that is a bad thing. Of course the youngest had to keep watching us until they got in their car and left. Or the people who drive by us (we have support ribbons all over the back of our car) and flip us off and call us killers. Gotta love ignorance.

Everything happens for a reason... Just Believe



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HOPPY7327's Photo HOPPY7327 SparkPoints: (15,008)
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7/27/08 8:37 A

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I also have gotten a few of these and yes it can be very irritating.

Shannon

“The more time you have to think, the more time you have to make excuses.”


“People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing -- that's why we recommend it daily.” Zig Ziglar


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MISSMISCHIEF's Photo MISSMISCHIEF Posts: 487
7/27/08 1:45 A

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1. As you find out her husband is deployed, take it upon yourself to tell her exactly how you feel about the war and how WE shouldn't be over there.
2. Follow that up by asking how she feels about the president.
3. Look surprised and say, "I don't know how you do it. I could never LET my husband do that."
4. If she is pregnant, be sure to ask her if the military is sending her husband home for the birth.
5. Tell her she should really consider getting more life insurance since her husband has a good chance of getting killed.
6. Remind her how lucky she is that her husband gets all that tax free money when he is deployed.
7. Try to relate to her by telling her exactly how she feels because your husband was out of town for a week on business last month.
8. Ask her how she can be faithful for 15 whole months and if she worries about her husband cheating on her.
9. Inquire on whether or not her husband has killed anyone.
10. Be sure to ask her when her husband comes home if he is done with the military or if he has to go back.


I found this on a site and I for one have gotten #'s 3, 7, and 10. Just wondering if this annoys anyone else as much as it does me.

Never regret, regrets mean you never learned the lesson you were supposed to. Instead of getting even, make them miserable by being happy despite their attempts to rain on your parade.



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