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MANICUREFAN's Photo MANICUREFAN SparkPoints: (1,065)
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6/9/13 10:51 A

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I've been told I have BDD, body dysmorphic disease. I always feel like I need to lose weight, and I don't listen to people who tell me I look fine and don't need to lose weight. I don't recommend this mind-set. For me, I have to look at objective information, such as body mass index, rather than subjective judgments from myself or other people.

"Our life is what our thoughts make it." Marcus Aurelius


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GOODLANDGAL3 Posts: 7,942
6/9/13 10:02 A

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Thank you all for your wonderful posts. They are all so helpful to me on my weight loss journey.

Mary


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JOMADSEN47 SparkPoints: (4,664)
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6/9/13 8:45 A

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I agree.... You make life more important than food! It seems that I work hard to maintain all the time... Then if I do one thing like eat dessert with a meal I gain a pound that then won't leave. So one pound at a time over the years I have gained. I keep eating well and exercising but can't lose. Everyone says ...oh you don't need to lose. Or it's always been easy for you. They have no idea!!! Been doing this for a few weeks now. Still haven't lost anything.

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MOBYCARP's Photo MOBYCARP SparkPoints: (159,271)
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6/9/13 7:34 A

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Keeping the weight off can be as much of a challenge as taking it off, if not more of a challenge. As I approached goal, people started telling me I'd lost too much weight. After I got to goal, I lost another 10 pounds learning to stop losing weight. Along about the time my weight stabilized, I started hearing comments about how I really shouldn't lose any more weight.

Over the next year, the comments gradually stopped. People got used to my new normal appearance. But getting through that first year took a bit of mental fortitude and patience with well meaning people who only remembered me from the overweight period.

There's a classic saying, "Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels." That saying doesn't do much for me. I don't really care whether I'm thin or normal sized, and normal sized is an elusive concept to quantify anyway. So I developed my own sayings:

"Nothing tastes as good as being able to run a 7 minute mile feels."

"Nothing tastes as good as being able to do pullups feels."

"Nothing tastes as good as being able to walk comfortably at 91° F feels."

All of those are things I couldn't do before I lost the weight, but can now. I don't want to lose any of them.


- Kevin

"Discipline is remembering what you want. " - David Campbell

Max Lifetime Weight, 221
SP Start Weight, 196.6
Initial SP Goal, 175
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JOMADSEN47 SparkPoints: (4,664)
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6/8/13 10:48 P

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Don't think so much about how you look .... As how you feel. I tell myself I would rather wear what I want than eat what I want!

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LAST20FORME's Photo LAST20FORME SparkPoints: (4,152)
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3/22/13 5:33 P

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Thank you to the last few replies I haven't thanked yet. These stories are so helpful to me you can't imagine. I'm trying so hard (mentally if that makes sense) to keep the weight off and so afraid that people telling me I look average weight will relax me and make higher calorie food choices. Yes, I need some work on my psyche.
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BRENDAGAIL9's Photo BRENDAGAIL9 Posts: 7,365
3/22/13 4:19 P

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My downstairs neighbor who has lost over a hundred pounds with the lap band surgery made a remark the other day that I look fine and don't need to lose anything. I told her I do because my waistband is too tight but getting looser. Anyone smaller than her looks good to her. The card players sit and play at least four times a week and munch candies and chips and whatever else the baker's put out. They are all overweight.

I don't listen to others as I am my own person and don't need any advice or someone telling me what to do.

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Brenda

Chehalis, WA


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RHAL1462's Photo RHAL1462 SparkPoints: (63,411)
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3/22/13 11:31 A

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Remember why you started this - YOUR health - not someone else's OPINION. Your heart, knees, blood sugar, blood pressure, bone health, etc will all be better and YOU will feel better. When we let other people dictate how we feel about OURSELVES we are setting ourselves up for failure. YOU are worth more to you when you are fit and healthy than you are overweight and unhealthy.
Also remember that jealousy from others is a way for them to sabotage us as they may be wishing they could do what you are and don't have the motivation yet. Your improvements may make them uncomfortable but that is not your responsibility.
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HARVESTER54's Photo HARVESTER54 SparkPoints: (13,432)
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3/22/13 10:31 A

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I have had that happen to me. By a physician who I work with of all people!. He looks at me and my extra 30 pounds and says that I have nothing to worry about! BUT I know how I feel. Those hurting joints, low energy, tight jeans. UGH! Just a few pounds off has helped so much. I am looking forward to how well I am going to feel when I reach my goal weight!

"The joy of the Lord is my strength!"


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BSHOSH's Photo BSHOSH Posts: 210
3/20/13 9:42 P

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I had some of the same. Everyone here is right! I have to continue to tell myself to push to get there and push even harder to stay. If it were easy to obtain and maintain everyone would be at goal. The fit person in all of us is there, let it roar! No pain - no gain is so true.

“Movement is a medicine for creating change in a person's physical, emotional, and mental states.”


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MACILINN's Photo MACILINN Posts: 6,558
3/20/13 6:53 A

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Last time I was at goal wt, (which is much higher than the wt charts) I was deeply sabatoged by my overwt daughter, she said things like my face was so much preetier heavier, my wrinkles showed more, I didn't feel or act like the same person, and she was sad that my gdaughter wasn't going to get to grow up with the soft cuddly mom she had. She hated all the attn I got, that she didn't want to go anywhere w/me because everyone made comments, etc, etc. It was tough, it was only after I gained most back that I realized it was her stuff not mine and this time I swear to remember that.

Yes do it to feel better! Another thing that happened to me was comments from the neighbors (men) harmless, but It was abit scary. It's funny how the wt makes us more invisable. Enjoy your wt loss when it comes, its truly a wonderful gift if you focus on yourself.

~Maci~ Oceanside, CA
*If you don't like something... Change it!

~A special prayer to all~
"May your Neighbors, respect you, Troubles neglect you, Angels protect you, and Heaven accept you!"


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BRENDAGAIL9's Photo BRENDAGAIL9 Posts: 7,365
3/19/13 2:19 P

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I don't really like compliments because it makes me feel like I didn't look good before. Sometimes is feels like negativity to my mind.

Brenda

Chehalis, WA


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KAB7801's Photo KAB7801 SparkPoints: (77,398)
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3/19/13 2:01 P

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I think the more compliments I get the more I will keep it up. Right now it's hard because I am not getting any compliments, but I will!

A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body

See it, Say it, Believe it,
And it Will Happen

Take Delight in the Lord and He will give you your heart desires


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LAST20FORME's Photo LAST20FORME SparkPoints: (4,152)
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3/17/13 11:51 P

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Thank you everyone for your thoughts. With age comes wisdom and all of you have given me many gems to contemplate and digest. I appreciate all your responses.

ALANNN Posts: 7
3/17/13 3:37 P

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Our lives are filled with powerful media negativity. It may take daily messages to our selfs for years to overcome outside negatives. Some reason why media is always negative? Money.
Grief sells. Just be positive in your own life and the stress will calm down.
Down with negativity, free your self for what's impt.
Alannn

COUNTESS6's Photo COUNTESS6 SparkPoints: (6,163)
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3/17/13 2:05 P

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It seems that you are worried and anxious abut something that may never happen. Try to free your mind about what will or will not happen and concentrate on feeling good and doing good things for yourself. What others say and do should not effect you. Stay the course !

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TCHNCRFT's Photo TCHNCRFT SparkPoints: (15,333)
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3/17/13 1:12 P

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Alannn,
I really like all the positive messages in your post. You're so right that we need to send ourselves positive messages that will influence our mindset. Long ago, a WW leader said to think of how you'd talk to a friend, and treat yourself like a good friend.

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Carol

CAROL from PA

Ask your doctor if getting off the couch is right for you.


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ALANNN Posts: 7
3/15/13 2:10 P

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If you want to have control you need to practice control.
As part of our brain is dedicated to liking freedom
We as humans have to modify this freedom.
With control of the mind the exercise and diet is easier.

To practice control the first thing is not to disturb the mind with negative
Thoughts like this is too hard or I can't do it. Always be positive. Start
Thoughts with. I can, I will, I want to, I am going to... Make it positive: the
Brain responds to positivity as well as negativity. So because positivity
Is less stressful, it is actually more healthful to be positive.

To practice control there must be limits. First put up a do not enter sign on your
Goals and after you reach your goals. Let nothing negative enter your own mind,
Only you can do this, but if it's difficult you must reinforce your mission every day.

It's easier and more rewarding to reinforce yourself by repeating your mission daily
With positive thoughts than the alternative.

If you find your self slipping stop and put your mind back in order with a strong positive thought and another do not enter thought for negativity.

The more you practice with the mind the more you will see success.

Are you looking at exercise positively? Make it positive. Exercise is part of the mission,
Exercise is part of the goal, no negative thoughts about exercise period. Just
Do it and praise yourself well. Soon your mind will like exercise because it will release
Chemicals that make you feel good. Think of it, you will feel good when you exercise
If you keep out the negative thoughts. Do it, and do it right.
Repeat " I like it". With every step until your brain is retrained. I promise you
The positivity will then come naturally, all the do not enter signs must stay. Up.,
And up, foreverer, because we are all animals that need control.


SUNNYBEACHGIRL's Photo SUNNYBEACHGIRL Posts: 2,329
3/15/13 1:49 A

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I have a really hard time when I reach goal weight. It is not the comments from others but my ownissues with food and emotions that cause a relapse.


Sunny in Southern California PST

Challenges are what make life full of stress and anxiety and overcoming them is what can wear you out. Stay stong.

Don't stay down, every storm runs out of rain.

Team leader for 50+ members with 10-24 pounds to lose Team


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TIMOTHYNOHE's Photo TIMOTHYNOHE Posts: 4,317
3/14/13 11:13 P

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Do not! let well meaning people keep you from your goal. A lot of time people will tell you that you look sick. They are so used to seeing the extra large you that they just cannot accept the fit as a fiddle you.

Keep your eye on your goal.

Start by doing what is necessary, then do what is possible and suddenly you will be doing the impossible -- St Francis of Assisi

Rock 'n' Roll Dublin Half Marathon, Dublin, Ireland, 8/5/2013
ie.competitor.com/dublin/


NANCYRUBIO's Photo NANCYRUBIO Posts: 318,417
3/14/13 6:06 P

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You must do what you feel is best for you, no one else knows how we feel. Compliments and negative replies is just someone elses thoughts, not yours. Be good to you, you know what is best for you~

Edited by: NANCYRUBIO at: 3/14/2013 (18:07)
Depression is the impression left by fear. Be willing to fight the fear. Conquer it with love.

Nancy Rubio
Oro Valley, AZ


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ALANNN Posts: 7
3/14/13 5:44 P

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Compliments help me but if they detour you you are not alone, we all have detourents or we wouldn't be here. Put up a no stopping now sign in your mind when you get them and just take them in with a smile. It might change you mind set if you put up a sign "compliments can't change the mission". Or engrave it on your fork. Your heart thanks you more than you can appreciate now but you will later.

LAST20FORME's Photo LAST20FORME SparkPoints: (4,152)
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3/14/13 4:52 P

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Thank you for all the comments below. It really helped me!

BRENDAGAIL9's Photo BRENDAGAIL9 Posts: 7,365
3/14/13 4:09 P

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It's your body and no one knows it like you do. Don't listen to others. This is your journey. emoticon

Brenda

Chehalis, WA


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MUMSEY5's Photo MUMSEY5 SparkPoints: (42,841)
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3/14/13 4:01 P

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emoticon and emoticon

Keep working on your thought patterns, track your food and exercise and you will get there emoticon

Fiona
My personal blog
mumseysramblings.blogspot.co.nz


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KATWINK SparkPoints: (5,930)
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3/14/13 2:39 P

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I am trying to get to a healthy weight not to just look better, but to feel better. Keep reminding yourself that you are doing this to feel better!!!! emoticon

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LAST20FORME's Photo LAST20FORME SparkPoints: (4,152)
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3/14/13 2:21 P

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I just did a blog about an experience I had. A random person told me I looked fine and didn't need to lose weight. I actually need to feel overweight to push me to exercise and not eat a lot of carbs. I am now worried what will happen at goal weight. Will compliments cause me to relax too much and gain back. Anyone else have thoughts similar to these?

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