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TOPIC:   Maintenance Let Down? 


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VTRICIA
VTRICIA's Photo Posts: 1,897
3/9/13 9:29 P

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I'm nearer the top of my normal BMI range and am thrilled to be where I am, but I hear you about the breastfeeding. DS is finally eating enough to keep he asleep at night, but I think I need to adjust my calories down. Small increments, as always. I'll probably be weaning him in about a month.

Tricia in UT

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MJREIMERS
MJREIMERS's Photo Posts: 3,193
3/9/13 6:17 P

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I've felt the same way, too! I think it's because we are so focused on losing the weight that when we finally are successful we don't know how or where to refocus that energy! We get to our maintenance phase and are, "Now what do I do?"

However, this passes. Everyone figures out how much to eat, how much to exercise, how to maintain. We set a weight range goal and then figure out how to stay in it. We come to this group and get the support we need to continue to be successful on this journey that basically never ends. It's a good journey and one that I hope doesn't end for a very long time!

Maintenance is emoticon !

~Mako~


9 Days until:  Oklahoma 1/2 Marathon
 
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SEMISWEETCHICK
SEMISWEETCHICK's Photo SparkPoints: (12,647)
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3/9/13 11:11 A

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Thank you, thank you, BME_22 for starting this thread. And thanks to everyone for the excellent advice.

I'm 8 pounds away from my theoretical "goal weight" (a weight I sort of picked out of thin air), and I am feeling scared on many levels. I'm scared I won't get to my goal weight. And I'm scared I WILL get there. I'm scared of the letdown when I get there -- exactly what one person described as the loss of all that attention, the oohing and aahing over the weight loss.

A secret part of me wants to lose 10 pounds more than my stated "goal weight," and I wonder how much of that is the continued challenge involved in losing. Like another person said in this thread, maybe it's time to find different challenges (fitness-related would be good) to replace the competitive drive to move the scale needle.

Anyway, thank you again for starting this thread. It's nice to know others have gone through these apprehensions and have generously shared such great advice for coping.


 current weight: 166.1 
 
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MAREE1953
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3/1/13 10:25 P

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Ah, those child-bearing years...they are special. This is definitely a special time of life for you. I'd say focusing of what feels healthy for you right now is a great priority. Best wishes!


 current weight: -1.5  under
 
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SKIRNIR
SKIRNIR's Photo Posts: 5,126
2/28/13 1:42 P

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Sounds to me like maybe you should relax and maintain where you are. 10 pounds would be fine too. In the end, you have to decide. But either way know that with breast feeding eating a bit more is normal and life with a young child is stressful and stressing over your weight, isn't the best. Make up your mind where you want to be until you start trying to get pregnant again and try and be stressfree, weight wise anyway. A young child will bring plenty of stress and change!

3/31/12 Trailbreaker half marathon 13.1 miles in 3 hours 13 minutes
4/20/13 Neighborhood Watch 5K 39:17.6
10/5/13 5K Grace Pet Fest 38:47.6
12/1/13 Secret City Half Marathon, hopefully in under 3 hours!


 current weight: 7.3  over
 
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BME_22
BME_22's Photo SparkPoints: (13,408)
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2/28/13 9:26 A

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I guess there are other factors contributing to my uncertainty that I didn't really explain. I'm still breastfeeding my daughter, though we've cut back quite a bit since she turned a year old. I do wonder if quitting completely will have an effect (good or bad) on my weight. Up to this point, too, I haven't really been physically active at all. But I miss running. And now that I'm not waking up early to pump an extra bottle for the day, I have time to wake up early to run. I wonder if that might jump-start a little extra loss.

But I've just been so hungry lately. I feel like every day is a "hollow" day, where no matter what I eat, I'm still hungry. And as a result, the scale hasn't been moving. So yeah, i don't feel *great* about stopping here given the circumstances, but I guess it's not a bad place to be.

Maintenance for me will be for a limited time only. My husband would like to start trying for a second child as early as June, so I'll soon be putting weight back on, on purpose. That might also contribute to my uneasiness... I keep thinking, "but if I get down to 130 and then keep my weight gain to 30lbs, I'll still be at a normal BMI when I give birth. But if I get down to 120 and keep my weight gain to 30lbs, my highest weight will be my starting weight with Laura, etc".

Really, I'm about at the point where I'm sick of worrying how much I should weigh, though, so that might trump everything else :-/

If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?

What is right is not always easy, and what is easy is not always right.


84 Days until:  Baby #2
 
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LOGOULD
LOGOULD's Photo SparkPoints: (82,440)
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2/28/13 8:00 A

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I think that's why I so appreciate this team. I have been battling where my maintenance range should be since I hit my goal weight. I think I know where I want to be, and would be content with it not being at my lowest. Now to just get everything balance to be able to stay at that point.

"Success is the result of what you do when the Woo Hoo is all through....."-ON2VICTORY (Robert)

"The miracle isn't that I finished...the miracle is I had the courage to start." - John 'The Penguin



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SKIRNIR
SKIRNIR's Photo Posts: 5,126
2/27/13 7:51 P

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I have experienced that let down too. I do think that my 120 lbs. at 5 foot 3 is a good weight. It places me directly in the middle of a healthy bmi, probably for the first time in my life. But sometimes I want that flat stomach. Now my stomach has loose skin and just looks a bit weird/icky. I have fairly thin arms, but would love a flatter stomach, smaller thighs and smaller butt. But it seems that when one looses weight, they loose it everywhere, not just in the spots they hate, so one winds up with a smaller but samely proportioned body. Strength training would probably help me, but dag, I find it so boring.

3/31/12 Trailbreaker half marathon 13.1 miles in 3 hours 13 minutes
4/20/13 Neighborhood Watch 5K 39:17.6
10/5/13 5K Grace Pet Fest 38:47.6
12/1/13 Secret City Half Marathon, hopefully in under 3 hours!


 current weight: 7.3  over
 
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SUZYMOBILE
SUZYMOBILE's Photo Posts: 9,802
2/27/13 4:04 P

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You're getting a lot of great advice already!

I'd say: If you aren't sure, why not push through?

At this point in my journey, I've been at the weight where I feel the best, and I know that's where I want to be. I'm a little below that weight now, which feels even more comfortable, and my body doesn't let me get lower than that, which is okay. If you don't think you've reached that happy place yet, keep on pushing until you're sure you've reached it, and then you'll have a basis for deciding.

"Awareness is all."

"Letting go is much harder than fighting."
—SUZYMOBILE

"Everything is exactly the way it's supposed to be."

“Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next.” —Gilda Radner

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference." --Reinhold Niebuhr


 current weight: 4.8  over
 
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TINAJANE76
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2/27/13 4:01 P

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I have ABSOLUTELY been in your shoes many times before and it's part of what's informed my decision about my goal range this time around and not setting it too low. I've learned from past experiences that constantly striving for a lower weight only sets me up for failure. As your weight continues to go down, it becomes more and more difficult for you to maintain because the less you weigh, the lower your calorie needs are. At a certain point, you need to decide how much effort you're willing to put in to maintain. How few calories are you REALLY willing to consume on a daily basis forever and how much activity can you envision yourself continuing to do just to stay the same? You also need to make peace with the fact that staying the same is a good thing that's worthy of celebration. I've seen quite a few people literally unravel striving for constantly lower numbers that are sometimes unattainable. I'd suggest continuing to check in with weigh-ins however often you feel most comfortable doing them to make sure your weight doesn't start creeping up. At the same time, think about developing other goals for yourself that aren't connected to weight loss and the number on the scale until you feel more comfortable with the idea of staying the same. Good luck!

My name's Tina. I lost more than 90 pounds between March 2010 and March 2012 and have been keeping if off ever since.

Central European Time (CET), Venice, Italy


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TANYA602
TANYA602's Photo Posts: 946
2/27/13 3:11 P

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I am so glad you posted this question and that everyone is responding. I am nearing this point, and CATMAGNET defined something for me - it's that look in the mirror. I have a goal, and yet never imagined wearing the size pants that I am and yet I am 14 lbs from my goal. Maybe I am overshooting? I know I am still learning so much from not only the other teams I am a part of, but from all of you! Thank you!

Tanya
San Diego, CA

"Somebody said they saw me, swinging the world by the tail
Bouncing over a white cloud, killing the blues."
Robert Plant/Allison Krauss


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CATMAGNET
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2/27/13 2:54 P

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Definitely NOT alone!

I think it's all about what you're comfortable with. Are you happy when you look in the mirror? I know for me, it's was kind of like defining what's obscene or what pornography is: I knew it when I saw it. Somehow, I just knew that 155 was where I wanted to be, although it's a little higher than a "normal" BMI by less than a point. I just didn't want to lose anymore and was happy with where I was..and still am.

Jane

Camp Good Grief 5k 2012 - 31:50
Gobble Wobble 5k 2012 - 30:00
Turkey Trot 4 Mile Race 2012 - 38:38
Ugly Sweater 5k Fun Run 2012 - 27:19
Move-It Memphis 10K 2013 - 55:36
Germantown Half Marathon - 2:08:53
FedEx St. Jude Classic Fairway 5k - 4/13/2013
Pittsburgh Half-Marathon - 5/5/2013




NELLJONES
NELLJONES's Photo SparkPoints: (186,908)
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2/27/13 2:53 P

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No, you are not alone, and the let-down feeling is one the reasons for a Spark Maintenance team. Losing weight is exciting. You do what you are supposed to do and see results: the number on the scale goes down. Lots of applause, lots of oohs and aahs from friends and family. It makes tracking and doing all the new things you learned so exciting. Then you get to goal, that number that seemed so impossible, and.........what? No more applause.

So we keep doing what we learned while losing and applaud each other for Staying the Same. There is an excitement to that, too, but it isn't as obvious. The challenges are about staying within goal range for periods of time, and it feels great to get to the end of a challenge period...the same.

Keep coming back!! Keep sharing, stay close, and stay the same with us!

Nell

No one ever got up in the morning wishing she'd eaten more the night before.

Original Goal: 114. Current old lady goal: 106.


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ELECTRALYTE
ELECTRALYTE's Photo Posts: 10,207
2/27/13 2:42 P

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EXACTLY what you said Michelle! I could have written your post word for word. Nope, you are so not alone.

“it's been up to me to inspire me.”
~ Eric Clapton ~

"Atheism is a non-prophet
organization"
~George Carlin~

“When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.”
~Jimi Hendrix~

"A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality."
~John Lennon~

70 lbs. done!


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MKELLY72
MKELLY72's Photo Posts: 1,919
2/27/13 2:26 P

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I understand how you feel--I have been exactly there, and I can't really say that I have ever stopped being there, even tho I have maintained 148 (give or take 3 pounds) for the past year, I still keep thinking I want it just a little lower, but I'm happy staying here--it's a good place for me. I figured I would just keep doing what I was doing, and see if I lost a little more--but I really haven't--I've gotten down as low as 145 for a day or so once...but if I get there and stay there, will I want it to be 140?? I keep asking myself these questions too.
I don't have anything particularly helpful to add--just know that you are not alone in this mindset :)

Michelle

Highest weight: 248 August 2010
Reached goal weight of 148 Feb 23, 2012
1/29/14-Gained back 20-peeling it off!



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BME_22
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2/27/13 2:11 P

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I've been all over the place with trying to set a goal weight. I finally decided that I would just keep doing what I was doing until my weight loss slowed, and then I would work on staying put.

I'm getting to that point where my weight loss has really stalled. My BMI is about 20.7, so logically, I know that it's fine if I choose to maintain here. But....

I just feel kind of disappointed, like this is some major bummer that I have to stop HERE, not 2, or 7, or 10 lbs from here. Is this normal? How do you get over that feeling? Or do you just push through and keep losing weight until you DON'T feel disappointed with where you're stopping?

If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?

What is right is not always easy, and what is easy is not always right.


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