Posts: 6,355
3/10/07 9:18 A

thank you for the wonderful tips and inspiration everyone..I guess we are all so much alike.

I have been nervous since I have been at goal. Afraid that I will overdo it. I am forcing myself to weigh only once a week and trying to do without the nutrition tracker. I do find myself eating more "treats" but not overindulging. And I agree, my image hasn't caught up yet. I don't see myself as "looking great" even though I am in the size I want to be at. Its funny, when I was overweight I didn't see myself as overweight (still saw the thin old me) but now that I have lost the weight I don't see myself as everyone else does. Very weird.

Luckily I have running goals that keep me focused..if I eat bad I feel terrible when I run. The cardio is part of my routine and I haven't had much trouble getting it in.
thanks for listening...

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3/5/07 8:33 A

Awww - thanks both... didn't expect any replies but you've made me feel really good :)

P

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3/5/07 8:24 A

Great job, Paula!

I think that's part of what everyone needs to work on. All those studies show that women have an "all or nothing" attitude when it comes to food/dieting/healthy eating so I'm working on not being one of them... so you had the wine. You enjoyed it and tomorrow is a new day!!

-Sarah

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3/4/07 10:53 P

Good for you Paula! I notice that it's getting harder and harder for me to do that, so I recognize how important it is to remember how to enjoy food without guilt!

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3/4/07 5:38 P

This isn't really anything to do with body image but this is has been a nice thread with nice people and I wanted to report something I'm quite proud of.

I've been away for the weekend with a friend of mine and usually I'd stick rigidly to my normal routine or start getting a bit stressed about it.

I had 3-4 glasses of wine yesterday and enjoyed some really nice treats today that bumped my calorie intake about 500 cals above normal and .....

instead of panicking - I've had a nice time and am ok with it. It's just 2 days, one weekend, one well deserved bit of indulgence and I'm going to just get back to it properly tomorrow.

This is not like me at all!! but it's nice.

Paula

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3/4/07 4:31 P

Just wanted to say a few things as well. I too know I struggle with body image too. Sometimes I look in the mirror and still view myself no differently then I did when I started. It seems like I have these days, and days where I look in the mirror and think I look great. I definitely think it's a mind game, and just have to ignore myself and tell myself that I look great.

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3/3/07 3:22 P

Hi Kit,

This is such a reality for all of us. I went to shop for trousers today. Even though I've absolutely no rational reason for my size to have changed I somehow convinced myself there's no way I'd fit in the size I bought a fortnight ago (even though I've been wearing them) and it STILL came as a surprise when they did.

This is real stuff, for real people about real emotions. I've been feeling this way for a lifetime, it isn't going to switch itself off overnight and I realise now that I maybe NEED to remind myself regularly with things like shopping for me to get the message and come to terms with my new reality properly.

Paula

Posts: 386
3/3/07 8:50 A

I'm so glad this post was here this morning. I've crept up several pounds in the last few weeks, what with birthdays, restaurant meals, house-searching and too many appointments at work. And my body image multiplied those three pounds by, say, a a factor of 20! Yet yesterday, when I went out to pick up a new pair of jeans, they were still size 8s. So, there is a disconnect between my brain and reality on this one, just as many of you have been describing.

Getting back on the horse, I just planned a weekend of some of my favorite sure-fire weight loss foods, and lots of activity.

Thanks, all.

Kit

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3/2/07 1:03 A

Thanks so much ladies for your support! I've been off-line for several days due to the fact that we went over our alloted megs for internet use and got cut off. No such thing as unlimited internet use here. Thanks especially to Lenore to be reminded that I am God's child and He loves me no matter how I'm feeling. I also like the idea of putting up a picture of myself.
Blessings

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3/1/07 10:42 A

I still think of myself as "fat" and so on. I think it frustrates my husband a great deal since my mental vision of me is a lot slower in catching up with me. I look at my stomach and sigh over my laziness and paunch that I still have.

I have to make an effort to realize that part of the paunch is the end result of being female. And yes, I am not motivated enough to work on that aspect of my figure so I need to stop complaining till I do!

Like Shani, I'm always surprised when I see my reflection and realize that it's me. Me? I look like THAT? I look GOOD!

I also weigh-in officially once a week (never quite motivated enough to step on the scale daily, though I still only record it on the same day each week), which helps me keep an eye on my weight and which way it's going. I still log my food. I know that doing these things will help stall a regaining of the weight. Since I know that, it helps my demons stay quiet about gaining the weight back... but they're not gone.

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2/28/07 5:07 P

Hi Lenore,

I've found another tactical way to keep the maintenance programme going strong and stay in touch with my long-term goals.

I began rock-climbing last week. It's the kind of activity I could never have considered 8 months ago but now my lean, nimble, flexible and athletic body is really well suited to it.

I am really enjoying it - it's utterly knackering and gives me a mega-workout - and if I want to continue enjoying it (and the social side of it because it's a lot of fun) then I have no choice but to keep in the shape I am now.


Paula

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2/28/07 3:09 P

I need a reality check every once in a while too. I look in the mirror and I don't see that I've lost weight. I look the same to myself. I have to remind myself that I am wearing pants four sizes smaller, and that yes, I really am that small. Like Shani, the only time I really see myself is when I catch a glimpse in a window or mirror and don't realize at first that it's me. Just keep telling yourself how much you have accomplished.

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2/28/07 2:18 P

Wow, you guys are so on the ball (and beautifully said Lenore!)... I've found myself in these patterns and what I find helps is a current photo of myself. I forget that I look as good as I do. It is like that time I was in the airport and I caught my reflection in a window and was shocked at seeing a slender woman pulling her suitcase along and realizing it was me. I still tend to think of myself as much chunkier and focus on the parts of my body I don't like. Ugh... how silly. The truth of the matter is that we all have those body insecurities to some degree or another. So yes, I have the same issues, and a current photo makes a huge difference in combatting the feeling that I'm not doing well.

Shani

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2/28/07 8:26 A

Kathy - I can see how this could happen once we get to a point where we are simply maintaining and think we have stopped progressing. One thing that can help is setting new goals. That will help you to have something to aim for even though you are maintaining your weight. I have some long-term goals but I also have some medium-range ones too. I am no longer interested in losing weight but I am doing some precious body sculpting through some heavy lifting, just two days per week. Now, I know that kind of thing is not for everyone, but could be a different kind of change in your routine: you could decide to take up some sort of tai chi (a good way to get into your community as a missionary!) or maybe try a vegetarian diet for a month and see if you feel any different; or find some people to tell about SP and encourage them on their journey.

A fit and healthy life is not about maintaining, really. It's about learning how to always be changing while staying healthy!

And, my sister, the best advice I can give you is to remember how you are seen by our Abba. Loved, adored, cherished and set apart for His work!! Blessed beyond blessings on this earth. Claim your worth and your beauty in Him and He will uphold you!

Lenore

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2/28/07 6:53 A

Paula - very well said...I think we all allow negative self-talk to creep in our heads.

Kathy - I've been going through the same thing off and on and I think all of us in this group have experienced similar problems. It's a battle we have to continue to fight and part of the whole maintenance journey. We're lucky to have others to support us and remind us we're not alone. We're also fortunate to have lots of tools and info here on Spark to keep us on the right track...practice the positive self-talk. Track your food to remind yourself how well you are doing at making good choices. (This helps me so much when I see that even on my worst days I am doing so much better nutritionally than when I started.)

Robin

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2/28/07 3:21 A

Hi Kathy,

I think our minds contiuously play one trick or another and it just depends what's happening and where we are at emotionally as to what trick is happening and when.

I use a range of mind tools and thinking patterns to make sure I choose useful and positive thinking to protect me from the negative ones. I believe it's really easy to slip into negative patterns and I need to notice them early when they happen so I can change things.

As for body image - I keep a really strong image in my mind of what I'm aiming at. Really clear and familiar and really detailed. This is so I don't lose sight of exactly what I'm aiming for. Otherwise, like you, I can find I'm beating myself up for not being good enough - no matter how good I am or what I achieve.

I think we sometimes accidentally move the goal posts without knowing it. I'm sure we've all done it in one way or another... you start wanting to be healthy and lose 10lb, but once you've done it then you decide you want to be fit AND healthy and this motivates you to lose another 10lb. Now you're on a roll, you decide you want to be fit and healthy AND look great, so you keep going and then (even though you've surpassed your original expectations and goals by miles and should be enormously proud of yourself) you then decide you want to GET INTO THOSE SKINNY JEANS YOU WORE WHEN YOU WERE 25 and you're used to reaching your goals so you're hell bent to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If it does happen, great, but it poses the question about where do we stop. If it doesn't (because by now you're setting ridiculous goals for yourself - no longer based on reality) when you don't make it you label yourself a failure.

FAILURE! you've made huge positive changes, increased your life expectancy, radically changed our image and how you feel but now that you've failed you risk getting miserable about it and giving up and yep - you guessed it... start consoling y$ourself in just one treat, just another treat and before you know it ... you're back in the thinking patterns you started with.

I find it protects me from all of that if I just keep in mind where I started, where I want to end up when I am make sensible goals that I can be proud to achieve.

Paula

Posts: 145
2/28/07 12:05 A

This is something that I have been struggling with recently. In my head I sometimes feel like I am back to the same weight I was when I started my diet. I think, "when are people going to start saying, 'when did you put all that weight back on?'" It's true I've added a couple of extra pounds and I know that I really don't look that way, but my mind plays tricks on me. Anyone else ever feel that way? I know its a mind game, but I don't like playing it!

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