Author: Sorting Last Post on Top ↓ Message:
SUZYMOBILE's Photo SUZYMOBILE Posts: 9,867
9/15/12 11:33 A

Community Team Member

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I've found that most social gatherings that I attend any more offer at least something that I feel comfortable eating, and if that's unlikely to happen, I bring a nice, big salad. I have no trouble avoiding bacon-wrapped scallops, stuffed mushrooms, cheese balls, or crackers. I might have one and leave it at that, then gravitate toward the veggies. Where I most have trouble limiting myself is the wine glass, so I bring my own zero-cal soda and lime to mix with the white wine.

"Awareness is all."

"Letting go is much harder than fighting."
—SUZYMOBILE

"Everything is exactly the way it's supposed to be."

“Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next.” —Gilda Radner

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference." --Reinhold Niebuhr


 current weight: 7.2  over
 
10
5
0
-5
-10
MANDELOVICH's Photo MANDELOVICH Posts: 2,374
9/15/12 8:56 A

Community Team Member

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I have two nights in a row of celebratory events. And the last few events I attended, I ate too quickly and a bit too much. Tonight and tomorrow, my intention is to savor every bite, to eat seated, slowly and mindfully. Also, at tomorrow's event which is for the Jewish New Year, I will be focusing on helping. My intention is to take the burden off my mother and really help her as much as I can, serving, clearing, etc. Tonight my intention is to focus on the love I have for my family, more than the meal.

Julie
Brooklyn

As you go through the day today, ask yourself this question: What's right? Notice it. Take it in. Allow yourself to be filled. ~ Geneen Roth

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. ~Mark Twain

"When we enter a state of mindful attention, the present moment, the now, eases open. And when it does, life pours in."
— Anne Glusker


 current weight: 120.6 
 
134
128
122
116
110
MJZHERE Posts: 630
9/15/12 8:53 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Lol Brooklynborn, just yesterday the thought of buffet came across my mind and I panicked. I have done a lot of work these past months but addressing my frugalness - when it comes to food at a buffett? How am I suppose to possibly maintain there? Thank you for your comment about the dessert - that truly helps. When I get to goal (only 3 more lbs to go), I will be ready for even going to the buffet.

93 Maintenance Weeks
 
0
25
50
75
100
BROOKLYN_BORN's Photo BROOKLYN_BORN Posts: 2,246
9/15/12 8:41 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Like MJZHERE I've generally been told that "I didn't have to lose weight in the first place."
I agree with them that as America got larger, my extra 30 lbs was hardly noticeable. I didn't HAVE to lose it, I just didn't want to "carry it" anymore,

Our food centered occasions are mostly church centered potluck, buffet things, and so many people pile their plates so high we actually have had to ask the group not to do that until everyone has been served so we don't run out of food. Then they are welcome to go back for seconds. So if my plate isn't full, it's OK.

I have a harder time when a group goes to a buffet restaurant where my frugal self is tempted to "get my money's worth." Lots of fresh fruit and raw veggies on the plate help me there along with a large chicken breast and dessert. I don't bake at home EVER, so I will eat the cheesecake or chocolate pie when available. Fortunately with everyone scarfing down multiple enormous platefuls. I kind of get lost in the crowd.

The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running.


241 Maintenance Weeks
 
0
65
130
195
260
WOLFKITTY's Photo WOLFKITTY SparkPoints: (65,714)
Fitness Minutes: (43,738)
Posts: 25,448
9/15/12 12:45 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I recently encountered this and simply wasn't prepared to react properly. Thanks for all of the advice and thoughts shared here! :)

Jocelyn

Get to it! "The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience..."-Eleanor Roosevelt
.
.
Are you done? Join the team!
teams.sparkpeople.com/DoneGirls


 current weight: 293.0 
 
375
325
275
225
175
MANDELOVICH's Photo MANDELOVICH Posts: 2,374
9/9/12 3:09 P

Community Team Member

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I so agree. Setting an intention and being very clear on values really helps to stay grounded and on track.

Julie
Brooklyn

As you go through the day today, ask yourself this question: What's right? Notice it. Take it in. Allow yourself to be filled. ~ Geneen Roth

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. ~Mark Twain

"When we enter a state of mindful attention, the present moment, the now, eases open. And when it does, life pours in."
— Anne Glusker


 current weight: 120.6 
 
134
128
122
116
110
ROSEWAND's Photo ROSEWAND SparkPoints: (92,600)
Fitness Minutes: (51,019)
Posts: 816
9/9/12 2:58 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Focusing on our values helps us stay focused on our intentions.

As someone who has not eaten meat for over twenty years,
I have learned to be in many social situations where meat is
the center of the meal and easily maintain my meat-free values.

Because I am committed to being meat-free, social pressure
is meaningless to me.

I have found that it is only when I have internal conflict that
I am susceptible to social pressures.

Clarify, clarify, clarify your values, intentions, and priorities,
and you will start and end right where you want to be.


Lost sixty pounds.
Have been in maintenance
for three years and nine months.

Goal weight 126


 current weight: 1.6  over
 
5
2.5
0
-2.5
-5
GOTTAPLAN4U Posts: 290
9/9/12 1:20 P

Send Private Message
Reply
Thank you all for your great replies. So many perspectives and so much insight. I have plenty enough to think about now.
emoticon


CELIAMINER's Photo CELIAMINER SparkPoints: (156,773)
Fitness Minutes: (88,618)
Posts: 11,282
9/9/12 12:52 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Such a thought-provoking thread! I'm glad I work with people who respect others' food decisions, and I live far enough from extended family that I don't get pressure from them. Recently though, my MIL, who is rail-thin, told me not to lose anymore weight. I replied that she was a great inspiration for me, in that I watched how she ate to maintain her weight and tried to pattern myself after her. That seemed to satisfy her.

Celia
Maintaining since May 19, 2012


 current weight: 3.0  over
 
5
2.5
0
-2.5
-5
MANDELOVICH's Photo MANDELOVICH Posts: 2,374
9/9/12 6:41 A

Community Team Member

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I recently learned of a reframe for social occasions. Before you go, find a non-food focus for the event. For example, make it a goal to meet a new person or help someone there, or to find time to explore the space where the event is held. If you go there with non-food goals in mind, it will help to take the focus off eating and drinking.

Julie
Brooklyn

As you go through the day today, ask yourself this question: What's right? Notice it. Take it in. Allow yourself to be filled. ~ Geneen Roth

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. ~Mark Twain

"When we enter a state of mindful attention, the present moment, the now, eases open. And when it does, life pours in."
— Anne Glusker


 current weight: 120.6 
 
134
128
122
116
110
POPSY190's Photo POPSY190 Posts: 4,500
9/9/12 12:55 A

Community Team Member

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I find the same problem with alcohol, which is empty calories, and which I don't really like anyway. Walking around with a wine glass of water and ice seems to work. People assume I have a "proper" drink and I have something in my hands to stave off having unwanted food pressed on me. People who try too hard to persuade you to have what you don't want are trying to assuage and rationalise their guilt over their own poor choices, and are basically being rude in the guise of concern.

Penny, Christchurch, NZDT GMT+12

Co-captain Panthers BL24
BLC25
www.blcpanth
ers.com


Genealogists live in the past lane.
The past is our definition. We may strive, with good reason, to escape it, or to escape what is bad in it, but we will escape it only by adding something better.


 current weight: 160.0 
 
160
155.25
150.5
145.75
141
4A-HEALTHY-BMI's Photo 4A-HEALTHY-BMI Posts: 5,926
9/9/12 12:06 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
For me, the challenge to be social is shifting the emphasis OFF the eating.

Some of that involves trying to suggest ways to socialize that don't revolve around food, but rather about activity - visiting a botanical garden or museum, attending an exercise class together, going on a bike ride, etc.

When it's an event that by necessity involves a meal/BBQ, etc, I try to plan ahead and read the menu online if it's available, eat something healthy beforehand so I won't be hungry enough to crave the snacks, make sure I have water, and try to continue tracking and make it fit in the plan.

If people push me to eat or drink something that doesn't fit in my plan, I just say "No, thank you, I'm content."

I don't think of these interactions as whether others are giving ME a "pass" to not eat according to their expectations. Rather, I think of these interactions as whether I am giving THEM a "pass" to goad me into behaviors I will regret. Who are THEY to say what I should put into my own mouth? LOL If they don't like how I'm keeping fit, that is their problem, not mine. :-)

As you said in the original post, YOU shouldn't have to be the one to deal with the feelings OTHERS have about eating. Their feelings belong to them. Unless you are their therapist, you are neither qualified nor required to deal with their feelings. I think it's OK to acknowledge that others have feelings, but the only feelings you are responsible for are YOUR OWN.

Stay strong. Know what you want. And work for it.
emoticon

Edited by: 4A-HEALTHY-BMI at: 9/9/2012 (00:07)
Never, ever, EVER give up!

From BMI 53 (336 lbs) to under 30. Now aiming for less than 20% body fat.

Media
tinyurl.com/4a-healthy-bmi-me
dia


Weight chart
tinyurl.com/4A-HEALTHY-BMI-graph

Blogs
tinyurl.com/4a-healthy-bmi-in
dex


Goal 155 +/- 3%


234 Maintenance Weeks
 
0
60
120
180
240
MARTHAWILL's Photo MARTHAWILL Posts: 3,725
9/8/12 9:34 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Wow- these posts are so helpful. Thanks to everyone. Great reminders to me. I find that when I have willpower, nothing and no-one will stand in my way to achieving my goals and maintaining my goal weight. When I am floundering, as I have been recently, the temptations are harder to avoid. It's a roller coaster ride. So thankful for SparkPeople and fellow Sparkers who share their struggles and approaches. What did we do before the internet? We were much more isolated in our efforts. I am getting back on track again- this is something I was not able to achieve in the past.
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Mary
EST

Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you'll start having positive results.

Willie Nelson

Ontario, Canada



 Pounds lost: 73.2 
 
0
21.5
43
64.5
86
HOUNDLOVER1's Photo HOUNDLOVER1 Posts: 7,906
9/8/12 8:53 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I can usually find something I can eat at a party and if asked if I want something I prefer not to eat I just say "Thanks I'm full".
Birgit

You can talk to God all you want and that's great, but the changes happen when you start listening to him.

BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN OTHERS.




 Body Fat %: 18.1
 
23.6
21.7
19.8
17.9
16
-SHOREIDO-'s Photo -SHOREIDO- SparkPoints: (27,204)
Fitness Minutes: (28,457)
Posts: 914
9/8/12 7:41 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Great outlook and advise!! People do tend to not understand at first but over time the message sinks in. Hey I didn't get it myself at first but I do now. Good luck with your goals. Will check out the Facebook page and see if it fits. Enjoy the rest of your week-end.

Lets RUN with the wind!!


 July Minutes: 173
 
0
29
58
87
116
MOBYCARP's Photo MOBYCARP SparkPoints: (144,922)
Fitness Minutes: (74,037)
Posts: 10,414
9/8/12 7:22 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I think this depends on how each individual fits into his or her social environment. I'm going through my second year on SP, and I'm finding some of the same events easier to deal with a year later.

A year ago, I was fighting both myself and people who noticed I wasn't eating as much as I used to. Some of these people were concerned about my sudden weight loss and apparent lack of appetite, obviously warning signs of a health problem!

Now, I'm down 4 whole pounds since January 1 and have several months of maintaining in a tight range. People are getting used to this is how I look, instead of being shocked that I've lost a lot of weight. On the internal battle, I've learned stratgies like wandering around with a glass of water, and asking if there's sugar in the iced tea. (Last Sunday, there was unsweet tea! Hooray!) And I've learned to make a small treat last a long time, instead of inhaling multiple small treats like I would have done before SP.

It's possible that I just associate with people who really do mean well and can learn, but I'm seeing that this is easier (not trivial, but easier) than it was a year ago.


- Kevin

"Discipline is remembering what you want. " - David Campbell

Max Lifetime Weight, 221
SP Start Weight, 196.6
Initial SP Goal, 175
Current Goal on Ticker, 162


 current weight: 0.8  over
 
5
2.5
0
-2.5
-5
WILLOWBROOK5's Photo WILLOWBROOK5 SparkPoints: (10,797)
Fitness Minutes: (29,091)
Posts: 248
9/8/12 7:10 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I concentrate on the social aspect of the event and don't worry about whether my eating habits are pleasing others. Which sounds a little anti-social but my health decisions aren't dictated by a committee. I do get comments about being too skinny (I try not to roll my eyes at that), I shouldn't lose any more, I need to eat more, etc. I figure people mean well and change the subject.

Sometimes there is very little I want to eat because the food is so calorie dense. I either eat lightly before/after the event to make up for the fatty food or more typically I eat a real meal when I get home after eating lightly at the event.


Edited by: WILLOWBROOK5 at: 9/8/2012 (21:03)
 July Minutes: 0
 
0
500
1000
1500
2000
1LADYMYSTIC's Photo 1LADYMYSTIC SparkPoints: (22,075)
Fitness Minutes: (36,505)
Posts: 131
9/8/12 5:09 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Wow. That is definitely a problem that I face all of the time. I'm vegan and gluten-free and have been for quite awhile, but I still have friends who invite me over for cookouts and dinners where all I end up being able to eat is the salsa and chips or the veggie platter. I constantly feel like an outsider, although that does not stop me from asking if I can bring some portabellas or zucchini to throw on the grill or my salad to a department luncheon. If anyone asks, I just smile and say that I don't eat certain things and if it is a question of why I am not overloading my plate, I simply say that this is all I need. People still make comments sometimes, but usually a simple answer will deter further questioning.

There is only one of you in the world, so take care of yourself in all matters.


 Pounds lost: 8.5 
 
0
2.125
4.25
6.375
8.5
MJZHERE Posts: 630
9/8/12 4:55 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Just got home from barbeque social. Saw this post before I left and that taught me a major lesson - prepare ahead of time. I tend to stew not prepare. So thought about the event, the problems some of the people there are having with changes in me, and my past food issues and how to answer if weight came up (which I expected). Decided I would have small portion of ribs (which I love) and see what else might be there. So the one who dished out potato salad and beans, which I didn't accept, made a point to talk to me later. Said it is time to stop this weight loss, I look like a scarecrow. I said that I am stopping (true as I have hit my first goal and second goal of 5 more lbs is down the road now due to injury). When she talked on, upset with me, I just answered the truth, "I feel so much better now. I could barely walk before and now I feel great!" (again all true). I love this person so later joked with her that it might be true I wouldn't have gotten hurt so bad if I still had the extra padding (fell) and she did laugh (despite herself!). There was a great salad, fresh fruit which I enjoyed also. Made a point of telling those who cooked how good it was - which it was. One of them softened and later told me how good I looked - also stating it is time for me to quit now. I reminded myself here and before I got there how much I love these people. Really enjoyed myself and will be careful today to make up for those ribs (and stay out of the ones sent home with dh).

93 Maintenance Weeks
 
0
25
50
75
100
NANCYANNE55's Photo NANCYANNE55 SparkPoints: (83,565)
Fitness Minutes: (94,565)
Posts: 5,042
9/8/12 4:32 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I don't know about the mental sabotage part, but in social situations I simply say "No, thank you". If they ask me why I reply with "I'm so sorry! That looks delicious, but it just doesn't fit in with my eating plan right now." It's honest, but not offensive.

I found that over time people started accepting that I wasn't going to eat crap most of the time and left me alone. Maybe they think I'm fanatical, but who cares? I'm the one who's responsible for taking care of this body God has given me responsibility over, not them.

Nancy Anne

My blog, about my personal experience and opinions of fitness related stuff: itallmakesadifference.blogspot.com/


 Pounds lost: 27.0 
 
0
11
22
33
44
PHEBESS's Photo PHEBESS Posts: 31,941
9/8/12 3:44 P

Community Team Member

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I'm not quite in maintenance yet, but I have maintained my initial weight loss. Anyway, I'm like PeggyT3 - I have small portions of the high cal stuff (or skip it), a lot of salad or vegs or fruit, and maybe one small treat - and log it all in. I also ONLY eat foods I LOVE as that treat - if it's something I feel so-so about, I don't waste calories on it. If it's something I love, then that is my treat for the day (or more likely the week).

We went to a BBQ last week, I had watermelon and one chocolate chip cookie - because I don't trust potato salad or coleslaw, and I don't like pulled pork. But I do love watermelon (3 slices) and I also love chocolate. So that was my compromise.

"Dance as if no one is watching."


 Pounds lost: 45.0 
 
0
22.5
45
67.5
90
MENNOLY's Photo MENNOLY SparkPoints: (85,589)
Fitness Minutes: (61,389)
Posts: 8,329
9/8/12 3:32 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I guess I approach it differently. As long as I am on target nutritionally most of the time I don't worry about social events and eat what I want from what is offered. When I was working and food was available in the office. the others knew I did not eat what was brought in. On the other hand tomorrow I will be going to the Renaisance festival and I will be eating fair food. I won't track and I won't stew. I will probably gain 5 pounds on Monday morning from the salt but it will be gone by next Saturday. Since I have approached this as a lifestyle change and not a diet, I am allowed any food I choose to have. Most of the time it is fruits and veggies with some protein and limited grains and fats. For an event I eat anything I want and don't worry about it. So far I have been on a downward trajectory over time, so I am doing OK for me.

"Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of." anonymous

Carpe Diem! Seize the Day!

"Arriving at one goal is the starting point to another." John Dewey

Eastern Time


 current weight: 200.0 
 
272
241.5
211
180.5
150
PEGGYT3's Photo PEGGYT3 Posts: 2,368
9/8/12 3:28 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
My husband and I go to most social occasions together and yesterday we went to a barbecue cook-out. There was delicious barbecue, salad, potato chips and a Klondike bar for dessert.
I had one small barbecue sandwich, lots of salad, no potato chips and the Klondike bar. I felt I shouldn't have had the last item, but it was a hot day and I hadn't had a treat like that in
ages.
When I got home I entered everything I had eaten in my Sparkpeople nutrition log and was surprised to find I had not gone over my calorie count. Nobody commented on what I ate or what small portions I chose. We're all over 60 and have learned that the fellowship is much more important than the food. We had a great time!

Sparkpeople and Jazzercize veteran


 
109,844 SparkPoints
SKIRNIR's Photo SKIRNIR Posts: 5,172
9/8/12 2:11 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I do feel this pressure some too. But I have found that when I say, "I lost 50 pounds two years ago and I intend to keep it off." that people seem fairly open to that. I do feel that I should at least often times have one cookie when they make homemade cookies or goodies, but tend to limit it at that.

Potlucks, I make sure I bring some fruit or veggies, so that I have something healthy to chew on. Basically, I am rather shy and sometimes having a plate with a few carrot sticks helps me hide behind it a tad. It gives me something to do between conversations that doesn't look like I am hiding in a corner and people also don't constantly suggest I get food. They assume I have gotten food and this is what I have left. Make sense? IE at church walking around with nothing in your hands during coffee hour makes people encourage me to grab food. Having a cup of water, or some carrot sticks on the plate, says I have gotten food and don't need to be pushed.

3/31/12 Trailbreaker half marathon 13.1 miles in 3 hours 13 minutes
4/20/13 Neighborhood Watch 5K 39:17.6
10/5/13 5K Grace Pet Fest 38:47.6
12/1/13 Secret City Half Marathon around 3 hours and 4 minutes
4/19/14 Butterflies for Hope 5K for Lupus 39:23.8 (I hurt my back a few days before, and though it was my first official 5K with some jogging, my back hurt, so was very slow.)


 current weight: 7.3  over
 
10
5
0
-5
-10
GOTTAPLAN4U Posts: 290
9/8/12 2:09 P

Send Private Message
Reply
Electralyte,

So did you just wear them down over time so now they don't care or did you have a natural alpha mind that willed them to leave you alone about it from the start?


Edited by: GOTTAPLAN4U at: 9/8/2012 (14:09)

ELECTRALYTE's Photo ELECTRALYTE Posts: 10,207
9/8/12 1:27 P

Send Private Message
Reply
I guess when I was younger I had all those people in my life, parents etc. that pressured me to eat what they made.
I think now that excuse doesn't fly for me. Nobody really cares what I eat or how much I eat except for me.

“it's been up to me to inspire me.”
~ Eric Clapton ~

"Atheism is a non-prophet
organization"
~George Carlin~

“When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.”
~Jimi Hendrix~

"A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality."
~John Lennon~

70 lbs. done!


170 Maintenance Weeks
 
0
45
90
135
180
TINAJANE76's Photo TINAJANE76 SparkPoints: (61,620)
Fitness Minutes: (45,429)
Posts: 3,967
9/8/12 12:03 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I think this is a tough one and something I definitely struggle with. Since it's not realistic for us (nor would it be pleasant) to cut off all social contact that involves food, we need to think of an alternative. I suppose you could try, though it wouldn't always work, to move the social interaction into friendly territory such as your home or places that you know have healthy options. Then you could have more control over what you're eating without feeling guilty that you're not loading up on the unhealthy food your host provides.

As far as developing mental toughness goes, I think you have to stand by your convictions that what you've done and what you're continuing to do works for you and that you need to stick with it. If anyone gives you a hard time about not piling your plate high at events that are filled with lots of unhealthy options, you could respond that "while I'd love to and it's definitely a sacrifice not to eat all of the wonderful food you've prepared, I know overindulging would be a negative step towards undoing all of the progress I've made and that would make me unhappy. Enjoying your company and sticking to portions I feel comfortable with is the nicest way I can imagine celebrating this special occasion and our time together." I think something to this effect could work because you're acknowledging the hard work your host has put into the event, letting him/her know that you value your relationship and sticking to your guns all at the same time.

My name's Tina. I lost more than 90 pounds between March 2010 and March 2012 and have been keeping if off ever since.

Central European Time (CET), Venice, Italy


 current weight: -1.0  under
 
5
2.5
0
-2.5
-5
KIM--POSSIBLE's Photo KIM--POSSIBLE Posts: 2,651
9/8/12 11:46 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
This has been a constant struggle for me. I eat mostly fruits and veggies, very limited sodium, and severely restrict processed foods. As a teacher, this has been difficult since there are so many meetings and luncheons where food choices are not necessarily healthy. With 5 kids and a husband who runs a fast food restaurant chain, this issue is compounded for me. The people I work with, though, have only known me as I eat now. I changed my eating habits before I came to work there two years ago.

I either bring my own salad and limit what I eat from the faculty meals or bring a main dish that I know I can eat that will fit my requirements. I have been known on many occasions to bring my own salad to McDonlads or other restaurants, and DH's staff at the local restaurant know exactly how to prepare my salad and grilled chicken.

Just yesterday, a friend said to me that I don't eat good because I "need bread" and other foods that she knows I don't eat. I'm not sure why exactly it is assumed that I don't know what to feed my body and don't know how to read the cues that I receive when I eat different things. Bread makes me feel bad, makes me swell. I don't need it, haven't eaten it regularly in a long time. My assistant comments frequently on the way that I eat, but I have learned to let things go and ignore it. She is the one with diabetes, eating crackers and fast food, then complaining that she can't have this or that. I eat what I love: salads, fresh fruits and veggies, lean chicken and fish. I avoid the things that I don't like and that make me feel bad.



~~Kim in NC~ EDT
Aug 2009: 175
Dec 2009: 142
Aug - Dec 2012: 135 size 4
*30lb gain in 8 weeks*
Feb 2013: 164
Hypothyroid Diagnosis,
April/13: 166 size 12-14
July/13 Jaw surgery
Sept- confirmed Hashimoto's
Dec 2013: 162
March 2014: 155
Goal: 135-140 size 4
“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength!"~ Unknown


 current weight: 155.0 
 
175
165
155
145
135
MJZHERE Posts: 630
9/8/12 11:36 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Waiting to hear - I am leaving in about an hour for a very food filled social event. Most there are overweight. Lately, it is as if I am on the "outside" because I am losing weight. C'omments have been made about how I didn't even need to lose in the first place. Even before I was losing, it didn't feel socially acceptable because I didn't pile my place high. Hoping to get other's ideas for help. So far my self talk is this: I want to be here for the people and the event. I will enjoy what I do eat - if I pile my plate skyhigh I don't enjoy it, I just plow thru it. I know why I have lost this weight. It would be nice if others were happy for me, but I don't need their approval to be happy. I am happy with myself. I love these people and will show them I love them.

93 Maintenance Weeks
 
0
25
50
75
100
GOTTAPLAN4U Posts: 290
9/8/12 11:18 A

Send Private Message
Reply
To be social is to be eating. I expect my healthy eating plan to be in constant battle with the pressure of social eating. Even when I reach the point where my nutrition plan is totally ingrained and has become a very happy, comfortable habit, I expect to be fighting social convention: the pressure to eat what others have prepared, to participate when other are indulging, to comply with their judgments of what is healthy, etc. These are powerful forces.

When we are in weight loss mode we are given a pass on social eating either as a gift by well wishers or by demanding it. After reaching goal the pass will be rescinded. As you have all commented. People will come to know you as you are currently.

I would like to develop a mental toughness about this now that will be ready when I reach my goal. I would like to be completely unfazed by this type of effect. I want to force (if necessary) everyone else to "just get over it" ( the way I eat or don't eat). I don't want to be the one that has to deal with their feelings on eating.

Have you been able to get past this type of mental sabotage?


Page: 1 of (1)  

Report Innappropriate Post

Other At Goal & Maintaining + Transition to Maintenance General Team Discussion Forum Posts

Topics: Last Post:
Daily check in 5/14 5/15/2014 3:06:33 AM
BOPPY_ has maintained for ONE YEAR!!! 6/29/2014 2:53:33 PM
Daily check in 1/14 1/14/2014 11:26:35 PM
Daily check in 9/25 9/26/2013 2:41:15 PM
DIANNEMT has maintained for ONE YEAR! 5/7/2014 9:41:17 PM

Thread URL: http://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/team_messageboard_thread.asp?board=0x1111x49827560

Review our Community Guidelines