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DIDMIS's Photo DIDMIS Posts: 97,211
6/16/11 3:38 P

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Thank you. we all need a good laugh sometimes.

IRENE FROM TEXAS
The Lord bless you
and keep you;
The Lord make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:22-26 (NIV)



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RUTHIE254's Photo RUTHIE254 Posts: 262
6/16/11 3:37 P

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Thanks for the humorous thoughts! -- enjoyed this thread.

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DIDMIS's Photo DIDMIS Posts: 97,211
6/16/11 1:38 A

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A little different. Someone from another team sent this so I am sending it to you.

You've no doubt heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves. My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick. The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans. And then the thieves struck again……

My butt was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my new butt was attached at least three inches lower than my original! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favor of long skirts.

Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary - my body was being replaced one section at a time. What could they do to me next?

When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story. Women of the world wake up and smell the coffee! Those ‘plastic’ surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts - stolen from you and Me! The next time someone you know has something 'lifted',
Look again - was it lifted from you?

THIS IS NOT A HOAX - This is happening to women everywhere every night.

WARN YOUR FRIENDS!

P. S. Last year I thought someone had stolen my Boobs. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.

I thought this was too 'important' not to pass on.


P.P.S. Those same thieves just came into my closet and shrank my clothes

IRENE FROM TEXAS
The Lord bless you
and keep you;
The Lord make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:22-26 (NIV)



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DIDMIS's Photo DIDMIS Posts: 97,211
5/11/11 10:14 P

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Thank you Marsha.
Irene

IRENE FROM TEXAS
The Lord bless you
and keep you;
The Lord make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:22-26 (NIV)



 current weight: 152.0 
 
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SLENDERELLA61's Photo SLENDERELLA61 SparkPoints: (148,112)
Fitness Minutes: (110,759)
Posts: 7,649
5/11/11 9:54 P

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Thanks, DiDi!! Some real truth here in the midst of humor....

Central Florida, Eastern Standard Time Zone

Marsha's Keys to Success = Tracking! Super Foods! Step Up Cardio! And most important: Quit Quitting!!


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DIDMIS's Photo DIDMIS Posts: 97,211
5/11/11 2:49 P

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Something else I copied from a friend who copied it from someone else.
Another little orphan with no place to go but don't want to start another topic.
I don't believe we have a chat do we.

HERE IT IS.
"somebody is caring about you.
somebody misses you
somebody wants to talk to you.
somebody wants to be with you.
somebody hopes you aren't in trouble.
somebody is thankful for the support you have provided.
somebody wants to hold your hand.
somebody hopes everything turns out all right.
somebody wants you to be happy.
somebody wants you to find him/her.
somebody is celebrating your successes.
somebody wants to give you a gift.
somebody thinks that you ARE a gift.
somebody loves you.
somebody admires your strength.
somebody is thinking of you and smiling.
somebody wants to be your shoulder to cry on
Believe this in your heart and you shall receive what God has for you.


IRENE FROM TEXAS
The Lord bless you
and keep you;
The Lord make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:22-26 (NIV)



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DIDMIS's Photo DIDMIS Posts: 97,211
5/9/11 12:47 P

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Glad you liked it. emoticon I copied it from someone who had copied it from someone else and gave me permission.

IRENE FROM TEXAS
The Lord bless you
and keep you;
The Lord make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:22-26 (NIV)



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HOUNDLOVER1's Photo HOUNDLOVER1 Posts: 7,903
5/9/11 11:31 A

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emoticon emoticon
Thank You! That was good!

You can talk to God all you want and that's great, but the changes happen when you start listening to him.

BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN OTHERS.




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DIDMIS's Photo DIDMIS Posts: 97,211
5/9/11 11:03 A

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I don't find an adequate place for this so thought I would add it to something else funny I sent.


I finally figured out why I look the way I do!

As I was washing my hair in the shower this morning, I took time to read the bottle. I am in shock!

The shampoo I use in that runs down my entire body says "for extra volume and body"!

Seriously, why have I not noticed this before?

Tomorrow I am going to start using "Dawn" dish soap! It says right on the bottle, "dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove".

It pays to read the warning labels, my friends!
Thought I would spread a little humor today.


IRENE FROM TEXAS
The Lord bless you
and keep you;
The Lord make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:22-26 (NIV)



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DIDMIS's Photo DIDMIS Posts: 97,211
4/15/11 3:50 P

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Thanks everyone for commenting.
Irene

IRENE FROM TEXAS
The Lord bless you
and keep you;
The Lord make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:22-26 (NIV)



 current weight: 152.0 
 
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HOUNDLOVER1's Photo HOUNDLOVER1 Posts: 7,903
4/15/11 1:32 A

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emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

You can talk to God all you want and that's great, but the changes happen when you start listening to him.

BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN OTHERS.




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MARTHAWILL's Photo MARTHAWILL Posts: 3,725
4/14/11 9:51 P

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Hilarious. Thanks for sharing.

Mary
EST

Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you'll start having positive results.

Willie Nelson

Ontario, Canada



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BELLACUDDLES's Photo BELLACUDDLES Posts: 21,361
4/14/11 5:07 P

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Amen, sister!

Barbara .....that's what my friends call me! Never cared for the name Barb.

Make it a blessed and healthy day! IT IS YOUR CHOICE!

Remember how special you are and how you are soooooo worth it to be healthy and fit!!

Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the assurance of things unseen. Hebrews 11:1

Leader of Christian Inspirations for Healthy Living



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ELECTRALYTE's Photo ELECTRALYTE Posts: 10,207
4/14/11 3:17 P

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emoticon too true!

“it's been up to me to inspire me.”
~ Eric Clapton ~

"Atheism is a non-prophet
organization"
~George Carlin~

“When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.”
~Jimi Hendrix~

"A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality."
~John Lennon~

70 lbs. done!


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DIDMIS's Photo DIDMIS Posts: 97,211
4/14/11 2:29 P

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Some nice benefits of growing older
From senior news Contributed by Susan Capps
1. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
2. It’s harder and harder for sexual harassment charges to stick.
3. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
4. People call at 9:00 p.m. and ask, “Did I wake you?”
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There’s nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won’t wear out.
8. You can eat dinner at 4:00 p.m.
9. You can live without sex but not without glasses.
10. You got cable for the weather channel.
11. You have a party and the neighbors don’t even realize it.
12. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
13. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
14. You send money to PBS
15. You sing along with the elevator music.
16. Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.
17. Your eyes won’t get much worse.
18. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off
19. Your joints are more accurate than the National Weather Service.
20. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them either.

I am not in agreement with all of these but won’t tell which ones.


Edited by: DIDMIS at: 4/14/2011 (22:38)
IRENE FROM TEXAS
The Lord bless you
and keep you;
The Lord make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:22-26 (NIV)



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165.5
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